It wasn’t until he pulled down his long drive he could breathe easily.
Inside those walls, a girl needed him. No matter what Jo made him feel, he’d be her rock, the person she could count on.
He’d be whatever she needed him to be.
11
Jo
The first time Jo saw the news, she couldn’t believe it.
The second time, she wished it wasn’t true.
A clip of Dax punching Blake played on repeat in her mind. Dax wasn’t a fighter. He didn’t do things that put him in the spotlight.
And yet… there he was on the evening news. Nothing less than prime time for the idiot rock stars.
Well, Blake was an idiot. She wasn’t quite sure what Dax was yet.
The front door opening had Jo scrambling from the bed. She knew what Dax would say when he found her on her feet, but at the moment, she didn’t care.
“What did he say to you?”
His head jerked up at the sound of her voice.
That was it, wasn’t it? Dax had to have been provoked. And she could only imagine what Blake said that was bad enough to get the quiet singer to make a move.
Dax set the bags he was carrying on the kitchen counter, ignoring her question.
“Dax.” She walked closer, worry causing her to frown. Dax was doing too much for her already—and she didn’t know why. She couldn’t let his entire world unravel because of her. “They’ve connected the video of you in the grocery store to the picture of us leaving the hospital.”
He grunted like that didn’t matter.
Only, she knew it did. At least to him.
He put away the groceries in silence. Jo kept her eyes trained on him, on his face. He had a placid expression, a mask.
She stepped around the island counter. “Talk to me.”
When he looked at her, his eyes held a depth she’d never seen before. She could get lost in that look if she wasn’t careful. So much pain, so much worry.
He brushed a hand through his hair, and that was when she saw the rawness of his knuckles. He followed her gaze and grimaced. “Punching people isn’t as much fun as it seems in movies.”
She smiled at that. “Were you a punching virgin, Dax Nelson?”
His cheeks reddened, the flush spreading down his neck. “I… yes.” He said it like he was embarrassed, like it meant he wasn’t tough.
Without thinking, Jo grabbed his hand to examine his knuckles. “It’s a good thing, you know.” She looked up. “To not punch people. Grab an ice pack and meet me on the couch.” She turned away from him, gripping her lower back as she made her way to the living room. She flopped onto the couch.
Dax joined her a moment later with a bag of frozen peas. Jo took it and patted the couch beside her. He lowered himself, keeping a distance between them.
“I don’t bite.” She tugged on his arm. “Come on, give me your hand.”
He studied her for a moment in that quiet, intense way of his. Under different circumstances, she might have backed off and let it be a confirmation that he wanted nothing to do with her.
But his knuckles were still raw from punching Blake, from punching him for her.
When he didn’t extend his hand, she reached over and grabbed his wrist. He didn’t resist.
A sigh escaped his lips as Jo pressed the frozen peas to his knuckles. Neither of them spoke for a long moment, but then she’d have enough. “Dax, I’m starting to think you like me.”
His brow furrowed, but he didn’t respond.
“You hold yourself so separate from the rest of us in the group, but at the same time, I see you talking to the other guys and—dare I say—smiling. I always figured I was the problem, that I was too much to handle.” He wouldn’t have been the first person to say that.
Her dad.
Blake.
Most of the people on her tours.
“I’m sarcastic,” she continued. “Sometimes, I say mean things without meaning to.” She fingered the ends of her hair. “I’m a little out there. And the kicker? I’m having a baby with a detestable human being. I always understood why you didn’t talk to me. That made sense in my messed-up world. But now, I can’t understand you at all.”
He looked down at her hand, still holding his.
Jo wanted him to say something, anything. To explain why he’d let her come stay here or why he’d punched Blake.
“I…” he started, unable to finish his sentence. He cleared his throat. “You’re intimidating.”
She frowned at that. “Dax, you’re more famous than all the rest of us combined. I mean, look at this house—or the jets you hire instead of flying commercial. Your life is huge. I’m the one who lives alone in an apartment and has been hiding for months. I’m the one the world now knows got preggers on a one-night stand.”
He reached out with his free hand and grabbed her arm. Their gazes clashed, neither looking away. “Don’t be ashamed of this baby. Not ever.”
There was so much sincerity in his voice it made Jo’s eyes tear up. She blinked the emotion away. “I’m not. At least, I don’t want to be.”
“It doesn’t matter how your son was created, Jo. It doesn’t even matter that you can’t reveal Blake’s name to the press. Not really. This baby is yours, he’s a part of you. All that matters is if you love him.”
She rested a hand on her belly. “I do. I love him so much, and I haven’t even met him. I’m not used to loving people. It’s a bit terrifying, isn’t it?”
Some look she couldn’t decipher shone in his eyes. “Yes, terrifying is one word for it.”
“Can I ask you a question?”
He nodded.
“How did it feel punching Blake?”
He laughed at that before his smile faded. “He had it coming.”
“Yes, but I expected it to be Noah or even Drew.”
“I had my reasons.” He broke their eye contact. “I won’t let him hurt you anymore.”
She wanted to ask why, to know what made Dax want to be her knight in shining armor. If anyone had asked her months ago, she’d have said she didn’t need a knight, that she could take care of herself.
But with Dax sitting beside her, she realized it felt good to have someone want to be there for her, it felt good to let him.
“Do you…” She swallowed. “Do you want to feel the baby?”
His eyes widened as they shifted from her face to her stomach.
She winced as the baby kicked in agreement. Well, she assumed it was in agreement. “Come on.” She removed the peas from his knuckles and put his hand on the side of her belly.
For a long moment, nothing happened.
And then, her baby kicked a hello.
A smile curved her lips. “Do you know Morse code? Because I think he’s trying to tell me something.”
The tension on Dax’s face cracked, revealing a small smile. “He’s not kicking in Morse code, Jo.”
“How do you know?” She dropped her voice. “Don’t listen to him, alien baby.”
The doorbell ringing snapped them out of their tiny bubble, and Dax pulled his hand away, curling his fingers in.
Jo moved to stand, but Dax shook his head. “I’ve got it.”
Her gaze followed him as he walked to the front door and pulled it open. She couldn’t make out the muffled words, but Dax returned a moment later with Nolan by his side.
Jo almost forgot Drew’s promise to send Nolan. She hadn’t told Dax yet.
“Hey.” Nolan stuck his hands in the pockets of his black jeans.
She smiled and tried to push herself to her feet. Both men rushed toward her, but Nolan got there first. He wrapped her in a hug. “We’ve missed you on the tour.”
“I’ve missed being there.” Nolan’s hug felt good, his presence calm. There was none of the tension that seemed to thrive between her and Dax.
Dax cleared his throat. “Am I missing something?”
Jo directed her next question to Nolan. “Drew made yo
u sign an NDA, right?”
Nolan nodded. “But he wouldn’t say why.”
Jo pursed her lips and looked to Dax. “He has an NDA, and I’ll explain why he’s here in a moment. But I won’t tell him everything. It’s your secret, so you decide.”
Dax pulled on the back of his neck and blew out a breath. “Drew trusts him?”
She nodded. “He’s one of Drew’s dancers.”
Dax studied Nolan for a long moment before sticking out his hand. “I’m Dax Nelson.”
Nolan’s eyes lit up with pure glee. “No way.” He looked to Jo. “This is true?”
“I’ll explain everything, but I need to sit.”
“You should be in bed.” Dax’s admonishment didn’t hold the usual sternness. Instead, he seemed… flustered?
Jo sighed. “Fine, but if I’m going to bed, you two are coming with me.”
Nolan smirked at her words, and Dax frowned.
“Ugh, not like that, ya weirdos.” She hobbled toward the room that had become like a prison cell. Sure, a super nice prison cell with a view of the ocean, but it kept her trapped all the same.
She climbed onto the bed and situated herself. Nolan made himself comfortable next to her, but Dax hovered in the doorway.
“Okay.” She looked at both in turn. “Before I explain, you both need to remember this is Drew’s plan, not mine. We all know how Drew is.” She took a breath. “All right, so our problem is that the media is trying to dig up who my mystery man is in the photo. They were helped when Dax got caught fighting Blake. We need to change the narrative.”
Dax looked like he wanted to say something, but he kept his mouth shut. Wisely.
Nolan nudged her with his elbow. “So, I’m to pretend to be Jo’s lover. I don’t care if they learn who I am. I’m a nobody, so they’ll quit digging when they do.”
“Have you talked to Melanie about this?” Dax frowned.
Jo sighed. “Mel is not our publicist anymore. She’s off kissing Noah.” She shivered.
“Are you really sure pretending to date Nolan is the right way?”
“No.” She looked to Dax in challenge. “But would you rather the media keep looking for you?”
Dax didn’t say anything after that.
Jo clapped her hands together. “So, I have an appointment tomorrow. Doc wants me to come into the hospital in case something is wrong. I’m apparently high risk now. Nolan, will you take me? We’ll enter through the front and make sure we’re seen. By the time we leave, there’ll be paparazzi waiting for us.”
It felt strange to her to court paparazzi attention. She’d spent so long hiding the pregnancy. But the news was out now. This wasn’t for her. It was for the grumpy man scowling from the doorway.
She just hoped he realized that. “Dax, can Nolan stay here tonight? He’ll be on a plane after the appointment tomorrow.”
Dax gave a short nod and strode from the room.
Nolan sighed and leaned back into the pillows. “I expected Dax Nelson to be more…”
“Yeah, I know.” Some of Dax’s music held a joyful sound, one that didn’t fit with the stoic man who sang it. Maybe he saved all his happiness for the songs. Maybe there was some joy buried deep inside.
Dax was a puzzle, and Jo was determined to figure him out.
12
Dax
Dax checked the time on his phone—again—as Ben rattled off some lyrics. It was almost two. Jo’s appointment with his mom would happen soon.
He’d thought holding the first session with Ben would occupy his mind enough that he didn’t think of Jo and Nolan posing as a couple for photos.
The song he and Ben were working on would be for Dax to record with Ben’s entire band, but he hadn’t wanted Quinn Hayes and Conner Brooks to come. They didn’t know he was Dax Nelson, and he’d keep it that way.
When it came time to record the song, he’d record his parts separately from them.
“Did you hear anything I just said?” Ben didn’t sound annoyed, that wasn’t him. But curiosity shone in his eyes.
“I’m sorry.” Dax sighed. “I’m a bit preoccupied.”
“The Dax I know never lets anything affect his music. Get it together, man. This is the first song Fate will record with you.”
Ah. Ben was too nervous to be mad. It made perfect sense. “It’s a Piper song. We can’t go wrong.”
Piper had always been Ben’s safety net, even when he didn’t know it. She’d written his band’s songs in secret while letting the world think they were her sister Quinn’s words.
Ben rested a hand on the curve of his guitar. “I know. I just wish she was here to work on it with us.”
“Do you miss her? When she’s not here?”
Ben sighed. “Every single day.”
Dax envied Ben, he envied the way he was able to admit such a thing, to bare his soul to Piper. He was a guy who believed in love, completely and without question.
Dax didn’t know what to believe.
He flipped over his phone to check the time again, ignoring Ben’s stare.
“All right.” Ben held out his hand. “Give me your phone.” When Dax didn’t hand it over, Ben sighed. “She’s fine, Dax.”
“She?” His eyes widened. “No, I’m not checking for… No way.”
One corner of Ben’s mouth tipped up. He sat back in the chair in front of the recording equipment. Dax never let anyone into his home studio, but having a friend here wasn’t as bad as he’d imagined.
Dax couldn’t take Ben’s pleased stare any longer. “Do you want something to eat? I do.” He shot to his feet and marched from the room. In the kitchen, he gripped the sink and let his head fall forward.
The truth was, he hadn’t stopped thinking of Jo since she left half an hour ago. Were the reporters following her? Did Nolan get to hold her hand?
Ben joined him in the kitchen and put a hand on his shoulder. “Tell me what’s going on.”
Dax wasn’t a sharer or a talker in general. The only person he ever revealed his thoughts to was his mother. It was what kept him somewhat apart from Rockstars Anonymous, always in the background, never letting himself rely on it too much.
But maybe that was a mistake.
Reaching for the cabinet to the right of the sink, Dax pulled down a cup and filled it with water. After he drained half of it, he turned to Ben. “I really wish that was scotch.”
Ben gave him a teasing smile. “You and your expensive booze.”
“Only on occasion.” Dax was the drinker of the group, but he also knew when to hold back. His version of heavy drinking was sitting alone on his back deck at night with a single scotch. It suited him, being alone. Sure, he had family around, and he had his Rockstars Anonymous group, but he reveled in his silence, his peace.
A peace he’d never again have if the world knew who he was.
A silence that broke the moment he’d offered to let Jo stay.
Ben leaned against the counter, crossing his legs at the ankle. “It’s Jo, isn’t it? She’s the problem.”
Dax snapped his eyes to his friend. “No. What? Why?”
“Drew and Noah placed a bet on how long this whole thing would last before you couldn’t take having Jo in your space anymore.”
Dax’s face flushed, and he turned away. “She’s fine. We’re fine. I’m—”
“Fine?” A smile curved Ben’s lips.
Dax set his glass on the counter. “What was the bet?”
Ben shrugged. “I didn’t want to get involved. Noah bet it would be over by now, that you two would have found other arrangements. He seems to think you and Jo don’t like each other much.”
Dax choked on a laugh. When he caught his breath, he met Ben’s gaze. “And Drew?”
“Well, Drew always sees things the rest of us don’t. He’s the only one in the group who’d ever thought there was a possibility of Mel falling for Noah.”
“He thinks I’ll…” Dax shook his head and clamped his lips shut to avoid reve
aling any of the secrets he’d kept buried. Jo was… He scrubbed a hand across his face. “Do you think she’s okay?”
“At the hospital?” Ben lifted one shoulder. “She’s with your mom, right? You have any food?”
“Check the pantry.”
Ben opened the walk-in pantry. “It looks like it all needs to be cooked.” He paused. “Scratch that.” He pulled a bag of salt and vinegar chips free. “You, my man, are too good to me.” He ruffled Dax’s hair like one would with a child.
Dax pushed him away and retrieved two seltzers from the fridge, tossing one to Ben. “Enjoy it. It came at quite the cost.”
He thought back on his fight with Blake. Before then, Dax had managed to get through life without ever throwing a punch. But it had felt good, too good.
“Wait.” Ben’s grin widened. “You got into the fight with Blake because you went out to buy me snacks?”
“And Jo.” He hadn’t meant to let that slip.
“Gotta say, man, when I saw you on the news, I almost died.”
“You almost died because I got into a fight?” Dax started back toward the studio. “That makes zero sense.”
Ben matched his stride. “No, I almost died because I was laughing so hard I couldn’t breathe.”
Dax hid his smile by ducking into the studio. “We have some work to do.”
“You don’t want to check?”
“Check what?”
Ben held up his phone. “I know Jo is in her appointment right now, but if anyone caught a picture of her and Nolan, it’ll be online already. She and Drew were right. The media will continue speculating about the father of her baby until we give them one. Now, the attention will be off you.”
Something about this plan still didn’t sit right with him. “You don’t think lying to the media is wrong?”
“Not when telling the truth would break the stupid NDA Jo signed.” He sat and opened the bag of chips. “My mouth is definitely going to hate me.”
“Why?” Dax perched on the arm of the couch.
“Have you never had salt and vinegar chips? Your mouth eventually starts calling out for mercy, but by that point, you can’t stop eating them.”
Love is a Drum Beat (Rockstars Anonymous) Page 8
