Love is a Drum Beat (Rockstars Anonymous)

by Michelle MacQueen

  “Jo Jackson? Dax, most friends go to the hospital after the baby is born, not during the birth.”

  “I’m not most friends.”

  “Why?”

  Dax swung the bag over his shoulder. “Because I’m in love with her.” He’d fought it when she needed a friend, when being seen with her was one step closer to his anonymity disappearing.

  Now, none of that mattered. He pictured her in a hospital room surrounded by nurses she didn’t know. She needed him.

  “Crap, I don’t have my car.” His bag slid from his shoulder, dumping some of its contents.

  Marco bent to help him. “Calm down, Dax.”

  He blew out a breath. “I have to get to her. Can you order me a car?”

  “I’ll do you one better. I’m parked out back. Come on.”

  Dax was so frazzled he didn’t realize he’d left his ball cap sitting on the couch. All the care he’d taken to avoid being seen entering or leaving the studio didn’t seem to matter anymore.

  Not when he had to get to Jo.

  Marco lead him to a dark blue SUV and unlocked the doors.

  “Please hurry.” Dax leaned his head back on the seat.

  Marco wound through traffic. It didn’t surprise Dax that Marco knew which hospital to go to. The entire world had seen the pictures of Jo.

  “Drop me off at the ER. It’s the quickest route to labor and delivery.”

  Marco didn’t remark on Dax knowing that bit of information, and Dax didn’t tell him why. A drop of rain hit the windshield, followed by another and another until a steady drumming sounded off the roof of the car. Each moment gave more life to the rain as it pounded into the earth.

  They reached the hospital as the skies opened up. A line of cars blocked the ER patient entrance as people waited for the valet.

  Dax opened his door.

  “What are you doing?” Marco tried to stop him. “It’s pouring down rain out there.”

  “I don’t care. She needs me, and there is no way I’m letting her down.” Whatever he had to do. “Thanks for the ride.” He didn’t hear anything else Marco said as he dove into the rain and started running past the line of cars. Paparazzi huddled under the overhangs, kept outside by a guard watching over them. They were here for Jo, but they wouldn’t get close to her.

  The paps paid no mind to the average guy sprinting by them. The doors slid open, letting out a blast of cold air that had him shivering. He stepped into the full waiting area, water dripping from his hair and rolling across the lenses of his glasses. He left a trail of water in his wake, but he didn’t look back.

  There was a line at reception, and he waited. And waited. When he stepped up to an older woman sitting behind the computer, he slapped a wet hand on the counter. “I need to know what room Josephine Jackson is in.” He couldn’t remember if she used a different name.

  The woman didn’t smile. “You and every other reporter who has found their way in.”

  “I’m not a reporter.”

  “Sure, and I’m not the receptionist.”

  “What?”

  She looked up. “We aren’t in the habit of giving room numbers of our high profile patients. You’ll have to watch the magazines like everyone else if you want to see if Apple or Banana has been born.”

  “What?” Apple? Banana?

  This time, when she looked up, it was at the line gathering behind him. “You aren’t getting up to that floor. Now go. You’re clogging up my line.”

  He stepped aside, eyeing the double doors.

  “Don’t even think about it.” The woman scowled. “I already had one patient sneak by me today. Leave.”

  Pulling out his phone, Dax stepped away from reception and prayed for his mom to answer the phone. She’d get him up there. He hung up when her voicemail played.

  Dax crossed his arms and turned to survey the waiting room. There had to be a way that didn’t involve making a run for it.

  It hit him then. There was.

  He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. There were two IDs in it. One said his name was Dillon. He only used that one to buy his scotch.

  The other… He smiled in apology at a woman approaching the desk. “Excuse me, this is important.” He slapped the second ID down on the counter, making the woman jump.

  “What’s the meaning of—”

  “My name is Dax Nelson, and I need to get up there because I’m the father.”

  “The—”

  “Father, yes. Feel free to go get your fifteen minutes of fame by talking to the reporters outside. I’m not hiding anymore. Jo Jackson is having my baby, and if I don’t get to her, she’ll be doing this alone. That’s not good enough for the woman I love.”

  The woman peered at his ID. “You’re really him.”

  “Yes, now, are you going to hand me a visitor’s pass or not?”

  She gave it to him, her entire face going red.

  Dax tried to avoid looking at the phones recording his every word, but they pushed closer and closer. Their word bounced off him, a jumble of sound he couldn’t quite work out.

  He backed up, clipping the visitor’s pass to his sopping shirt.

  “Dax,” someone called.

  “Is it really him?” another asked.

  The scowling woman behind the desk gave him a much kinder smile now. “Son, this is a place for the sick. Your presence here is not a good idea. I’d go. Run through those double doors and to the elevator. They’ll be able to tell you where Jo is at the nurse’s station.

  He blocked out the rest of the sound coming from the people who had been witnesses to the biggest moment of Dax’s career.

  The day his face became just as famous as his songs.

  And he didn’t care. The worry racing through him wasn’t because of the crowd he’d left behind or the paparazzi outside the hospital doors.

  None of that mattered. Only Jo.

  21

  Jo

  Jo leaned back against the pillows and groaned. “Just get this baby out of me.” Her arm shot out, tangling in the IV cord, and she grabbed Doctor Lawrence’s wrist. “Name your price. Any price. I’ll pay it if you just start now. Cut me open. Do whatever you have to do.”

  The doctor smiled at her, trying to put her at ease. It didn’t help. There was no at ease. “Jo, this takes time. I don’t like to make any cuts unless it’s absolutely necessary. We will give you a medication called Pitocin, however. It will help the labor progress more quickly. I’ll have a nurse bring it.”

  “I was supposed to have another month. I’m not ready. I changed my mind; when the baby starts coming, push it back in.” It wasn’t lost on her how ridiculous she was. A rock star with the worst half-haircut known to man and demands no woman would make.

  The doctor pursed her lips. “You’re about three centimeters dilated, still not ready for active birth. We’re going to be monitoring you closely through all of this. Preeclampsia can cause complications, but we have no indication it will for you. Everything seems good to go. You’ll be thankful you spent the past month on bedrest.”

  At Dax’s house. Eating his food. Sleeping in his guest room. Letting him become one of the few people she could count on. “Doc, find Ben. I need to talk to him. I was wrong. I don’t care about interrupting Dax and his music. I just want him here.”

  She smiled again. “If I know my son, right this minute, he’ll be standing in the doorway of your hospital room, looking like he forgot showers didn’t require clothing.”

  Jo’s gaze darted to the doorway where Dax stood, chest heaving, and clothes dripping.

  “It’s raining.”

  22

  Dax

  The doctor ushered the nurses out as a tear rolled down Jo’s cheek. “I’m having a baby, Dax.”

  He crossed the room in three long strides and sat in the chair next to her bed. His hand found hers tangled in the blanket.

  “I left you a note,” she whispered.

  “You didn’t call me.” Hur
t flashed in his eyes.

  She blinked away tears. “I know how much you love your music. I didn’t want to get in the way.”

  He leaned forward, pressing his forehead to hers. “The music will always be there, Joey. Moments like this come and go.” Dax ran a hand over her head, a smirk appearing on his face. “What did you do to your hair?”

  She sighed. “There might be a mess in your bathroom. Ben was cutting my hair when my water broke.”

  “I should have been there.”

  “No, you’ve done enough for me, Dax. Once this baby is here, we won’t be your problem anymore.”

  He pulled away from her, a frown tugging at his lips. He’d once thought his music was the most important thing in the world to him—other than his parents. It was where the confidence came from. She’d guessed that about him long before living with him.

  But he realized he no longer shied away from Jo, he didn’t stutter or agonize over every word he said to her.

  Because she gave him the same confidence as his music, the same feelings.

  Jo closed her eyes, but he knew she hadn’t fallen asleep by the smile curving her lips.

  Dax loved this woman. And he loved her baby before he even met the kid because it was a part of her. He squeezed her hand. It wasn’t the time or place to be making declarations.

  Just like it probably hadn’t been the time or place to reveal his identity. Devlin was going to yell at him for it, but he didn’t care. If living under the media’s scrutiny was the price he had to pay to have Jo in his life, he would.

  “Have you ever thought you were both?” Jo didn’t open her eyes. “Perfect and good?”

  He remembered every word he’d ever said to her. I never wanted to be a perfect man, Jo. I just want to be a good one.

  He shook his head. “Jo… have they given you the epidural yet?”

  “Yes, but your mom told me it wouldn’t make me loopy, so I’m not. Can you distract me? Please? Anything beats laying here feeling my legs turn to Jell-O as the meds work magic.”

  He knew exactly how to take her mind off it. “So, I sort of told them I was the baby’s father so they’d let me up here.”

  She opened her eyes and pinned him with a disbelieving look.

  “I have proof.” He pulled out his phone, knowing all those people with phones probably uploaded his moment on the web already. It only took Googling his name. He passed the phone to Jo.

  She watched the video play out, her eyes rounding. “Dax.” She covered her mouth with her hand. “Have you called Devlin? He can do some damage control, claim you weren’t speaking truthfully, and—”

  “No. I’m not going back to the anonymous guy who had to sneak into his label’s own studio and couldn’t be seen hanging with his famous friends.”

  She handed his phone back and couldn’t decipher the feelings rolling through her. She was worried for Dax, but also… “I’m proud of you.”

  They shared a smile, the kind of smile that betrayed their friend pact.

  The kind of smile that would burn itself into Jo’s mind. “So, Dax Nelson, you’re about the become the most famous singer in the world. How does it feel?”

  How did it feel? He pictured media outlets from around the world talking about him, fans recognizing him on the streets. No more brawls in grocery stores—even though he never planned to do that again.

  “It feels… Jo, I think I just turned my world upside down.”

  “Welcome to the celebrity life. You’re probably going to hate it.”

  He knew that. It wasn’t like he’d planned to have his face in videos across the web. “I don’t care. I needed to get to you.”

  23

  Jo

  Doctor Lawrence walked into the room and put a hand on her son’s now dry shoulder. Dax and Ben went to the gift shop, looking for dry clothes for Dax. He’d ended up finding a pair of green sweatpants with the hospital’s logo on them and a T-shirt that read “It’s a boy.”

  She’d always known Dax was a bit of a nerd, but this look... She couldn’t hold in her laughter.

  “It’s all they had.” He crossed his arms, meeting his mother’s gaze.

  Doctor Lawrence kept smiling. Why was she smiling when Jo had been here for ten hours with no baby appearance? Everyone was exhausted, but she was the only one who showed it.

  “Stop smiling.” She scowled.

  Doctor Lawrence didn’t listen to her. “Well, who is ready to have a baby?”

  “What?” It was the moment she’d waited all these hours for. “No. No, no, no. I’m not ready to push this alien out of anywhere. Give me another epidural. No, give me three. Why don’t you put me to sleep? Can’t you get this baby out of me while I’m unconscious?”

  “Jo.” Again with the smiling. “Trust me on this. You won’t want to miss the birth of your son.”

  She was right, of course. Jo was just being a big old baby. Ironic under the circumstances. “Is it still just Ben out there?”

  Dax leaned forward, his elbows on the bed. “He left, but he’ll be back.”

  “He left?” No. That wasn’t right. These rock stars she’d become so dependent on had to be here. “Drew isn’t here yet?”

  “He’s driving, so he’ll be here soon.”

  “Okay. Okay.” And Noah was on his way.

  But so was this baby. Two nurses entered the room. Jo couldn’t remember their names, but she struggled to recall anything when they rolled equipment into the room. “What’s all that for?”

  Doctor Lawrence pointed to one of the nurses. “Because of your condition, we need to have extra precautions in case the baby struggles to thrive outside your womb. They’re from the NICU.”

  Jo’s lungs squeezed for air as she hyperventilated. NICU. Failure to thrive. “Is my baby in danger?”

  Was she already a bad mom letting something happen to the baby? Why couldn’t she just stay in bed like she was told for the last month?

  Doctor Lawrence sent her a soft smile. “I can see the gears working in your head. You do not have control over this, and you do not have fault.”

  “I need…” She sucked in a breath. “Dax, squeeze my hands so hard it hurts.”

  “Why?” He didn’t want to hurt her, she could tell.

  “Just do it!”

  He took her hand and squeezed, watching her face for a reaction. Her breathing evened out, and she looked to the ceiling. “Okay, Doc. Now, I’m ready.”

  “Don’t be impatient, Jo. Active labor can take a while.”

  There was a noise at the door, an “oh my gosh” Jo recognized without turning to look at him. “Dax, get Drew out of this room right this minute!”

  24

  Dax

  Dax rose and walked into the hall, dragging Drew with him and shutting the door. “I only have a few minutes before I need to get back in there.”

  Drew followed him down the hall to the waiting area. “So, this is happening?”

  “Looks that way.”

  Dark circles ringed around Drew’s eyes, and he let out a tired sigh as he dropped into a chair.

  “You okay?” Dax sat next to him.

  “Don’t worry about me. Go be with our girl. I’ll just wait here to meet the little guy.”

  Dax stood, ready to take him up on the offer when his phone rang. “Drew, do you know why Piper is calling me?”

  Drew only shrugged and leaned his head back.

  Dax answered the call. “Hey, Piper.”

  “Finally.” She sighed. “I haven’t been able to get any of you on the phone. Jo and Ben aren’t answering. Noah and Mel are still in London, so they wouldn’t be any help.”

  “There a point to this call? I’m kind of in the middle of something important.”

  “Have you seen Drew? He had a concert tonight, but he disappeared. I kept hoping he’d show back up before he had to be on stage but no such luck. Not even Lola knows where he is.” She didn’t sound mad, only tired. “We have to refund people, and it’s ju
st a giant mess.”

  Dax pulled the phone away from his ear and looked down at Drew. “You jumped in a car and drove for hours to get here but didn’t tell your assistant or your girlfriend you were leaving?”

  Drew groaned. “I knew I was forgetting something. You know that feeling when you’re packing for a trip—”

  “Yes, that’s the equivalent of standing up thousands of fans.”

  “Is he there? I heard him.” Piper wasn’t going to give up.

  Dax handed his phone to Drew. “Pipes, you don’t understand. Noah called and told me Jo was in labor. It was like I couldn’t think of anything else. I had to get here.”

  Dax knew the feeling.

  “She’s my sister, Pipes.”

  Okay, so different feeling than Dax had.

  He spoke to her for a few moments longer before hanging up and handing the phone back to Dax.

  “You in trouble?”

  He didn’t get a chance to answer because the elevator dinged as the door slid open to reveal Ben and Noah, matching grins on their faces. “Baby here yet?” Noah asked.

  It had been a while since they’d all been together. There were handshakes and pats on the back. Shared smiles and excitement. Whether Jo believed them or not, this baby would be a Rockstars Anonymous baby.

  “I want to see her.” Noah took off down the hall.

  Dax followed him. “It’s your funeral.”

  Noah entered the room first.

  “Get out!” Jo yelled.

  Noah froze. “Joey…”

  “Noah Clarke, if you don’t leave this room right now, I will never let this baby learn bass guitar so he can join our band.”

  Noah’s eyes widened as if that was a huge threat. “Fine, but he better come out looking like me.” He turned on his heel and strode out.

  Jo caught Dax’s eye. “Have you seen many newborns? They come out looking pretty gross. If that’s what he wants to be compared to…” A laugh cut off as curse after curse flew from her mouth.