Damaged

by Leona Keyoko Pink

  Julia watched as it was sinking in. The bed, the bed, this whole mess of confusion and madness, had started because of the bed, the bed, the head on the bed. I swallowed, my throat dry. I stumbled back, hitting the dresser hard, refusing, refusing to even entertain the idea. And yet...

  "Well?" said Julia, growing impatient.

  I just stood there for a moment, quivering.

  "Well?" demanded Julia, "SAY IT!"

  "I don't know," I said, my voice cracking with emotion. Tears welled up in my eyes, blurring my vision. This was insane. I had no idea what was going on. I had no idea where he was. I didn't know. I didn't know anything.

  "You know," said Julia. "You just don't want to admit it."

  I looked at her but said nothing. This was all too much. Real or not, I was done. I raised my hands in frustration and turned to leave the room. Julia could see I was done with her game. She pouted, "You really are no fun, you know that?" She turned and waved her hands through the air.

  The room returned to what I'd seen when I'd first entered. Rose petals were scattered all over the floor and on the bed. Closer now, I could see the blood splattered on the bedspread. The rose petals must have masked it at first glance or perhaps it wasn't there before. The head was also back in the center of the bed. I was able to see the details of Thad’s face more clearly.

  I noticed there was blood on the floor and a body of a headless, naked man. I knew that body well. Without thinking I stumbled forward. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't think. I clutched my stomach and fell to my knees, vomiting everywhere.

  Julia got what she wanted. She relished in my pain, ate it up as I found myself screaming. My mind went into hyper drive. This wasn't real! This couldn't be real! What was wrong with me that I was imagining this? I started breathing heavily once more and fell on the floor. Julia laughed for several minutes, watching me, her face turning red.

  I heaved again before coughing and gasping for air. I nearly passed out. I wiped my mouth and continued to scream at the top of my lungs. Strings of snot escaped my nose, drizzling down my face as my entire body shook. I could barely see anything. I felt like I was going mad, truly mad.

  I don't know how much time passed but eventually my screams turned to whimpers. I curled up, bringing my knees to my chest and slowly rocked. When I was silent Julia boasted, "You know, removing a head isn't as easy as you'd think. But I have to say, it was worth it to see your reaction just now. I should've filmed it." She snapped her fingers. "Oh well, I'm sure we'll have more fun later."

  I glared at her and she rolled her eyes, "Oh, don't blame me. You're the one who involved him, hooking up with him in the first place. You still don't have any taste in men. I suppose with me not around to steal from, you did what you could."

  Again I said nothing. I could hear her speaking but wasn't quite processing it all. She moved over to the bed and sat on the edge again. She picked up a handful of rose petals and let them fall to the floor. "The rose petals were all him. I think given more time there would have been candles as well." She scrunched up her face in disgust. "How cliché, right?"

  I sniffled and wiped my eyes. I knew what she wanted. She wanted me to ask her what had happened. I didn't want to give her the pleasure but I needed... I needed to know. My voice came out barely a whisper, "What happened...What did you do?"

  She smiled, happy to have an audience. "Well, if you must know, the master sent me to collect you,"

  "The master?"

  "Don't interrupt or I won't tell you." She paused for dramatic effect and then went on. "I figured you'd be home like always but alas, you were at that lame office party. I waited for you. I watched Thad come home. He got all dressed up in his ratty clothes and put on his gas station cologne. He got all excited, taking out the rose petals and scattering them about. I got bored, soooo… I pretended to be you."

  She fully changed again. This time she became an exact copy of me. I didn't have to hear her say it to know what she'd done. She'd shown up as me and surprised him. He asked... he asked her to marry him, thinking it was me. I zoned her out for a minute, staring at the rose petals on the floor. When I zoned back in she was still going on.

  "And, of course, I said yes," she said in mocking tones. "After all, I was pretending to be you and that's what you'd do." She waved her hand about, showing off the ring.

  I'd been dragging my feet, dreading Thad asking me to marry him. Tears streamed down my face as I realized now he never would...never could ask anyone.

  "He was sooo happy! We fooled around and then he got naked. When I saw how little, how very little, he had to work with, uhh, I got bored again. So, I took the ring off and said I was just fucking with him, that I could never marry a piece of shit. I told him I'd been fucking everyone and everything, trying to make up for his excuse of a dick and I wasn't about to be stuck with it until death do you part."

  I couldn't believe she'd said all that to him... I stood up. No, I could believe Julia had said all that but... but she'd said it as me. What Thad must have thought...He...

  "You can imagine his reaction. He didn't take it well. Actually, why don't I just show you?" said Julia.

  She stood up from the bed and the room changed yet again. The head, the body, and the blood all went away. Instead I saw Thad on the bed with a second exact copy of me. I couldn't hear what was being said between Thad and the copy. I could only see his reactions, confusion, anger, his hands waving about, his mouth opening wide, possibly shouting, and then the pain, heartache.

  The copy of me looked smug and then it looked as if it were laughing. Thad looked devastated. He sat on the side of the bed running his hands through his hair. He looked like he might be crying. The copy of me moved over to him. It looked as if it might be trying to comfort him. It placed a hand on his shoulder. Thad jerked away and stood again.

  He shook his head, confused. An array of emotions washed through him. The copy of me stepped up to him and tried to embrace him in a hug. He pushed the copy away and stumbled back, too upset to allow any contact.

  The copy kept moving in and then there was something sharp, shiny. It flickered so fast, I almost missed it. The copy pulled a knife and slit Thad’s neck, drawing blood. His eyes filled with shock as he instinctively grabbed his throat. He looked at the copy of me in utter horror and disbelief. He stumbled onto the bed, trying to crawl away. He barely made it halfway before he collapsed and bled out.

  I stood frozen once it was over and they were gone. I took it all in and replayed it in my head. I looked up at the ceiling. This...This...This had to be some kind of nightmare. I couldn't accept that this was real. I shook my head, wondering now if I had died. If I had died and done something wrong and was now being punished with my own version of torment. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, thinking no, if that were true, then...then Lyndon would have been here.

  A cell phone went off and I opened my eyes. Julia, still looking like me, answered it. "Yes, I got her," She changed back into herself as she began to pace in a small circle."Yes, I'm ready. Go ahead and send her." And then she hung up. She turned to me and smiled. "Well, I guess it's time. Can I manage a schedule or what?"

  I looked at her, feeling angry. So, very, very, angry. It boiled up within me, slow but steady. I grabbed the nearest thing, a lamp, and threw it at her as hard as I could. The lamp soared from my hand but didn't collide with her. My aim wasn't off. I didn't miss. It went right through her. She... not even she... was real.

  I stood there for a moment. I was done, done, done, done with everything. I simply turned and calmly walked out of the room. From the hallway, I walked into the kitchen and then to the living room. I decided to go and just keep going until something, anything, made sense again. I reached the front door and it suddenly disappeared. The wall became solid and I stumbled back.

  Julia, or whenever this thing was, walked into the room, "That wasn't very nice, Bec. You could have hit me." She smiled and then multiplied into several Julia’s. "Oh wait, no you couldn'
t have."

  "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU!?" I screamed.

  "Better than you," she responded before cackling madly.

  Oddly, though there were five of her now right in front of me, it sounded like only one laugh coming from behind me. I turned around expecting to see her standing there but there was no one. And yet, I felt someone was there.

  I turned back around and the five Julia’s were approaching. "It's time to go, Bec." each of them said but again there was only one voice. It seemed to have moved to my side. I didn’t understand. All I knew was I wasn't going anywhere with her.

  I looked to the large front room window. At this point, it might be my only way out. I grabbed a flower vase from the coffee table Thad had given me for my birthday. I turned to the window and pulled my arm back to throw the vase when suddenly the window disappeared. This time it wasn't the only thing. My entire living room changed into four solid cement walls. They slowly began to move, closing in on me. I dropped the flower vase in shock. It fell to the floor and I heard it hit but it too disappeared.

  The five Julia’s surrounded me on all sides. There was no way out. I was truly, utterly trapped. I didn't know what to do. How could I fight this? How could anyone? I screamed as the Julia’s and the walls drew closer and closer. "STOP IT! STOP IT! PLEASE STOP IT!!!"

  I shrunk down where I stood, covering myself with my arms. I closed my eyes, terrified. Suddenly, I heard glass shatter. I squealed, screaming out. Someone grabbed me and lifted me. I opened my eyes as I was being carried. The walls had stopped moving. The Julia’s were frozen, huddled around the spot I’d been in.

  I was carried through one of the cement walls and suddenly found myself outside. I could feel the cold winter night air on my skin. I saw my front room window had been shattered. The person carrying me set me down in the snow. I saw it was a man in a hoodie. I looked around, wide-eyed.

  A woman was standing in my front yard with her hands up. She looked to be struggling. "I can't hold her for long!"

  "It's okay, I got her," said the man pulling back his hood. Though it was dark, I found I knew him. "RICHY!"

  "Hey, Becca! Sorry we're late. You okay?"

  "NO!" I said shaking my head, "NO! I AM NOT OKAY!"

  Chapter Fourteen

  I was definitely not okay! My whole world was topsy turvy, upside down, and all around.

  Though, oddly, seeing Richy was the first thing that made sense. After all, the last time weird

  shit happened and I'd been this confused was around him and the others... the others.

  My chest ached and I looked around even though I knew he couldn't...wouldn’t be here. He'd made it clear, perfectly clear; he didn't ever want to see me again. Still, like a fool I sought him out.

  "Are you hurt?" asked Richy, frantically looking me over and examining my bloody hands.

  "I...” I turned to him and could see he was worried. “No... not physically, anyway… I'm just really, really confused!"

  "That's Gigi for you." said the woman, still struggling with her hands in the air. "You... just have to remember... it's not real, it's all just... an illusion."

  "An illusion?" I repeated, still confused as ever. And who was Gigi? For that matter, who was this woman and why did she seem to be struggling so much?

  "Yeah, it can be tricky," said Richy, chiming in. "She's messed with all our heads a buncha times. It's not fun."

  I wasn't quite sure what they were talking about. I just nodded, happy someone else was here, though I wondered. "What are you doing here?" Emmit had made it clear he and the others would never see me again.

  “Em-ur I mean Micheal... sent us to check on you. We came as fast as we could."

  Emmit, he was going to say Emmit had sent them. Richy had let it slip. I probably wasn't supposed to know. I swallowed, my throat still dry. Of course Emmit wouldn't come himself. But did that mean he was still keeping an eye on me? I tried not to think about it. I tried not to open old wounds. Now was not the time.

  "PATEN!" shouted the woman. "We gotta go!"

  Paten? What?

  "RIGHT! We gotta get you out of here." said Richy. He grabbed onto my arm. "Come on!"

  "Wait!" I said, pulling free from his grasp. "I want to know what's going on."

  Richy reluctantly shrugged his shoulders and gave me an uneasy look. I knew that look even though it had been a few years. He wasn't supposed to talk about it, at least not with me. It was ‘complicated’. I didn't miss this... always being left in the dark about everything, especially when it clearly involved me.

  "We'll explain later!" said the woman. "Just trust us!"

  Trust wasn't exactly easy to come by right now. Not after everything I'd just been through. I needed some answers. For all I knew... as much as it pained me to think... They also might not be real. This could just be an extension of whatever was going on.

  "Who are you?" I asked the woman. "And what exactly are you doing?"

  "This is Morgan, the girl I told you about." said Richy, smiling proudly.

  "The one that was getting married?" I said. “The one who wasn’t awake?”

  I was a bit surprised I still remembered. That time with him and the others had all happened so fast. Nearly everything had been confusing and emotional. I'd done my best to block it out and not think about it but I found I nearly remembered everything.

  "Yeah, she woke up a few days before her wedding." said Richy excitedly.

  "On!" corrected Morgan, "I woke up ON my wedding day, no thanks to you!"

  Richy just kept smiling and shrugged. "Hey, it happens when it happens."

  I looked at Richy. I remembered how he talked about Morgan. How sad he'd been. Seeing him now, I could see he was different, happy. Could we have been happy, if I'd just ‘woken up’?

  "Right..." said Morgan. She sighed and brought her hands together, forming a triangle, and then pushed them out. "Come on! That should buy us some time but not much."

  They both turned and I followed them. We headed towards a jeep that was parked across the street. Before we could get to it, what appeared to be a hole opened up underneath the jeep. The jeep fell out of sight and disappeared as if the hole had swallowed it up. A second later the hole itself disappeared. We all abruptly stopped and pulled back, pausing.

  I think...I think I understood now. This wasn't real. Giant holes didn’t just suddenly appear and disappear, swallowing up jeeps. “It’s an illusion!" I said excitedly.

  "NO! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" shouted Richy. His eyes widened and his face twisted in horror. Frantically, he looked all around us.

  Morgan looked around, terrified as well, gasping, "Yawna's awake..."

  "Yawna?" I said. All these names were getting hard to keep track of.

  "THERE!" shouted Morgan, spotting something. She pointed to my roof. It was dark and hard to see but there was someone up there.

  "Stay close!" said Morgan, getting in front of me. "Just stay close to us! I'm gonna have to let Gigi go, Paten."

  "FUCK!" Richy shouted but nodded and clenched his fists.

  Again, mention of this Gigi and Paten. Was that a nick name for Richy or something?

  I looked at Richy and noticed his fists began to change color, turning gray... The gray slowly moved up his arms and throughout his body until he was completely covered in it. He looked as if he’d turned into a moving statue made of stone. My mouth parted and I began to panic. Did this mean he wasn’t real? Oh no…. Morgan moved her hands about and then clenched her fists. I half expected her to turn into a statue or something else as well.

  A moment later I heard a familiar scream of frustration, followed by cursing. The front door of my house whipped opened and Julia came rushing out. She nearly slipped in the snow when she saw me with Richy and Morgan. She froze, looking shocked and then angry. She moved her hands to her hips and said, "Well, this isn't fair!"

  The person on my roof jumped down, landing in my front yard. I saw it was a woman with long, curly hair. Julia took notice of
her and seemed to know her. She smiled confidently saying, "Well, now it is."

  The curly haired woman glared at Julia and sourly spat. "I was told you had her."

  "I did! I do!" said Julia, glaring back at her.

  "You two need to back off!" shouted Morgan, interrupting them. "You are breaking the rules! She is not awake!"

  Again with this ‘awake’ crap. Was that what this was all about? Julia and her curly haired acquaintance turned their glares to us.

  "Luka should have thought about that before he intervened." snapped Julia. "He already broke the rules."

  Luka... Out of all the names I'd heard so far, it sounded the most familiar. I don't know why but it made me think of Emmit.

  "We don't wanna fight you!" shouted Morgan."Just let us go!"

  The air suddenly felt tense and I had a bad feeling something horrible might happen at any moment. I shivered from the cold as the snow drifted down all around us.

  "YOU can go fuck off," said Julia, "But Keyoko is ours."

  Keyoko...Keyoko...Keyoko... The name echoed through my mind. I'd heard it before at the diner when I’d run into Emmit. His eyes had widened when he saw me, his mouth parted as he stumbled forward. He’d said, “Keyoko...Keyoko...Keyoko...” His voice echoed, not in my head, but in my heart. I clutched my chest and it ached. I closed my eyes, feeling dizzy and sick. This whole night was making me horribly sick.

  "Are you okay?" asked Morgan. I opened my eyes to see she’d tilted her head slightly to glance at me but didn’t take her eyes off Julia and her acquaintance.

  "Yeah,” I said. “Just a lot going on,”

  “You’re telling me,” said Richy. I looked at him again and his current form wasn’t helping things. Morgan nodded and then looked to Richy, saying "You should take her and go. I'll buy you as much time as I can."

  Richy looked at Morgan, like she was crazy and shook his head "No! No way! I'm not leaving you! There are two of them and two of us. We got this!"

  Richy gave Morgan a reassuring smile but she didn't seem convinced. Without warning, Morgan rushed forward. She flung her hands into the air, struggling. Both Julia and the other woman froze. I realized Morgan must have been stopping time again.