“Now, that is not the way to talk to me especially when I have a knife so close to tiny Josh. Please don’t anger me, you know what I’m like when I get really angry. Speak nicely to me, I need to calm down. Tell me how much you dream of feeling me move inside you again. Tell me what a useless lover Josh is.”
“Please don’t do anything to my son. I’m so sorry.”
“Sorry will not even begin to quench my rage. Speak dirty to me. Otherwise I will just stick this knife in his perfect little face and let him bleed to....”
“I’m sorry Freddie, I need to be with you now.”
“That’s it. Tell me more.”
“Please Freddie, let my son go.”
“You’re not helping me.”
She heard the swish of the knife as it left its metal case. “Freddie, please move back. OK Freddie...I long for your touch. Please make love to me.”
“Ok, go on. What are you wearing?”
She looked down her short skimpy blue summer dress, “Jeans and T-shirt.”
“Boring...What is beneath that?”
“Underwear.”
“What colour?”
“I don’t know,” she snapped.
“Take everything off.”
She heard the knife drive in home on a wooden table. She screamed hysterically. Josh put his arms around her trembling body but he did not dare speak. He did not want to unbalance his brother.
“What colour?” Freddie asked impatiently.
“Black,” she sobbed.
“What else, silk or lace?”
“Lace.”
“Now slide your hands down beneath that black lace and I want you to close your eyes and picture that wild Christmas party. See the dim lights. Feel the same beat of that music creeping inside your very core as our tongues explored the depths of each other’s souls. Feel my fingers caressing you slowly. Can you remember the way you leaned against the wall and hooked your leg around me as your dress rode high to your waist? You never cared about the three-month-old foetus you were carrying in your belly...or about the crowd pressing against us. Their envious eyes excited you and all you wanted was for them to see me carry you to the heights of pleasure, to the very top of the mountain. And then your audience applauded as your body shook with that sweet sense of gratification. Now do you want me as much as you wanted me that day?”
She heard him wedge the knife out of the table and scrape it against the wooden surface. She covered her mouth as she suppressed a muffled scream. Her voice shook uncontrollably, “Yes Freddie, I want you, I want you inside me again. Please, please do not harm him in any way, please calm down and step away from him, Freddie please, we are wasting time here. I want to leave for Longman’s airfield as soon as possible. I’ll be there, I promise, and we could be having sex all day tomorrow if you leave him alone today.”
She heard him laugh, that deep, rich, merry laugh that she used to enjoy so much. The good-humoured Freddie had emerged. She knew that it was over. She wept with relief.
“That is much better.” His voice was calm and steady. “Oh don’t worry, I was never going to do anything to Ben this evening, I just wanted to hear you grovel and scream. He is not even in the room with me. I was not going to let an innocent child hear our conversation and get to know what a slut his mother had been on a wild Christmas night. What kind of monster do you think I am...And oh by the way, I just love the blue dress you are wearing; it goes perfectly with the shape of your breasts. And your underwear, it’s not black or lacy. Well, you have nothing on today. It makes it easier for Josh who usually tears his way in. I saw you get ready for him this evening and I am assuming that you haven’t changed yet. You really should draw your bedroom curtains together. Someone might be lurking in the massive private woods at the back of your house. The fortress is not impenetrable, you know.” The line went dead.
Maria looked at her husband, “Josh, I’m sorry, I have to go. I’ll be all right. I know how his sick mind works and I think that I can handle him for a while until you come, but you must promise to come for me as soon as Ben is safe. You can’t possibly love me if you want me to live with that monster. Promise me, Josh. You have to come for me,” she insisted with tears in her eyes.
“I can’t promise that, I’m sorry too. Just accept your life with him. You will be happy, I know that, even he knows that. Just let him finish what he started during that Christmas party, you were enjoying it after all. Please don’t let me hold you back.” He stormed out of the room.
Maria looked pleadingly at Marco. He nodded, understanding her, “He’ll come, just give him some time. I will make sure that the risk he is so worried about will be minimal.”
Maria went upstairs to their bedroom. Josh was there, sitting on the side of their bed, intently looking down at the floorboards, his jaw clenched and his hands rolled in tight fists. He was in pain but there was nothing she could say that could possibly help him. She wordlessly changed into a frumpy looking shirt and an old pair of jeans; she was not going to make it easy for Freddie. Josh saw her slip their family photo inside her jeans pocket, the same photo he had seen her so lovingly caress in the dream. They set out half an hour later, the airfield being a good four-hour journey. They drove on in complete silence.
The small aircraft was faithfully waiting for them at the far end of the runway. Josh parked the car and got out. Freddie and Ben emerged from the plane.
“Please Josh,” Maria pleaded as she circled her arms around his waist. “Don’t be angry with me. That party was a mistake. My blinding jealousy smothered all reason. It was my resentment for your past that made me act that way; it was not lust for Freddie. Your dreams are wrong; I will remain faithful to you in my heart for as long as I live. I will never willingly sleep with him.”
But Josh knew that, with the passage of time, her promise to be faithful to him would eventually be broken. His dreams never lied and her passionate embrace with his brother as she wrapped herself around his body was branded on his mind for all eternity. But then again, will he remain celibate after all those years? Probably not. At that stage sex and love would have two separate meanings for both of them. He had no right to judge her. He did not want to part like this; his silent treatment would only fill him with regret and remorse later. He bent down and kissed her, that one long last kiss, as his tears rolled down her cheeks.
“Please come for me, I cannot be parted from you, this is breaking my heart. I will be waiting for you. Promise me,” she sobbed uncontrollably into his chest. With great difficulty she broke free from his arms and started walking away from him.
He saw her run the last few metres and kneel in front of Ben who was clutching the puppy. She hugged her son, pushed a note in his hand and pointed to her husband. Ben ran as fast as his little legs could carry him.
As Josh knelt down and started removing the boy’s explosive jacket, Maria’s haunting scream was carried across the distance. He looked up and saw his brother viciously hit her across her face and drag her by her hair into the waiting aircraft which took off immediately. The last image Josh had of her was her petrified face looking out of the window.
“Oh Maria, just give him what he wants. Your loyalty to me can only drive him insane,” Josh murmured up to the sky. She thought that she could handle him, well she was wrong. Freddie was the only person living on earth who was immune to her gentle persuasion.
Ben slipped her note in his father’s hands. Josh opened it.
My dearest Josh,
Don’t condemn me to that lifeless existence. Please know that I love you, I always have and I always will. You usually say that to me and now I’m saying it to you.
Maria
Josh shoved it inside his pocket and put his arm around Ben’s shoulder as he led him inside the car. He left the jacket there on the runway; the police will deal with it later.
“Daddy, will you bring mummy back?” Ben looked up at his father with trusting eyes. He was still at that tender age where he thought t
hat fathers could do anything, even move the stars or hold back the flashing thunder in the skies.
“I don’t know, Ben, I honestly don’t know.”
Conflicting Emotions
Maria looked into her husband’s eyes as he kissed her, their final farewell. His agony was tangible. With great difficulty she broke his embrace and started walking towards their son. A chilling wave of fear hit her as she caught sight of the bulky jacket. Who in their right state of mind would strap explosives to an innocent child? What if the boy fiddled with it and set something off? She had no time to lose. She ran the last few metres and fell to her knees. She hugged her son with the greatest caution, fearful of triggering that ferocious blast.
“You will be all right now,” she told him in between tears, “You have to give this to daddy and you are to go straight to him. Do you understand?” She furtively pushed a crumpled note in his hand, hoping that it would not get confiscated. But Freddie seemed to want to give her that last moment of privacy and he had moved quite a few paces away from them.
“I’m sorry, mummy.”
“None of this is your fault, you have to remember that. Now go very slowly, don’t touch any of the wires inside your jacket. Let daddy take it off for you.” Her heart stopped beating as she watched her son run towards her husband.
Freddie came by her side, relishing her pain, “If I press this black button I’ll blow them both to hell. Killing both Joshes with one stone. That’s a very good bargain,” he sniggered. She went absolutely hysterical as she screamed and desperately tried to grab the device. But he towered over her and brutally hit her across her face. He grabbed her hair and dragged her kicking and screaming towards the waiting aircraft.
“Don’t do it, please. You promised,” she pleaded as the plane started to speed down the runway.
Freddie laughed and sank down on one of the four luxurious leather seats. It was a spacious and expensively furnished aircraft. Freddie had obviously not lived in poverty during his two-year exile. He started to play with the device in his hand, slowly circling the black button with his thumb. He finally sighed and flung it on the adjacent seat. He looked up at her. His eyes travelled from her tearful face down to her toes and he shook his head with disapproval, “I told you to put on something nice, is this the best you have, an old pair of jeans and shirt? Shame on Josh. I did dress up for this occasion,” he said pointing out his immaculate blue suit. “Take everything off, I want to check if you have any hidden devices on your body.”
“Freddie, I swear I don’t have anything, there is no need to check.”
“I don’t think I can trust you...or Josh. I said NOW, or else I’ll blow your husband and your four children down to hell in their own home. I have been to your cosy little cottage while you were away on holiday and I have everything set up just in case you choose to be difficult. A phone call is all it will take.” He watched her take off her jeans, shirt and sandals. He checked everything thoroughly and found nothing but the family photo. He smiled as he put it back in her pocket. Maria was surprised, she had expected him to tear it into a million pieces.
“That photo was very touching…very touching indeed,” he smirked. “Now take off your underwear and stand still in front of me. I still can’t figure out how Josh could have possibly planned everything in advance back there in Murren. It must have been a tracking device. Don’t just stand there, you are making me very angry, think of your children.” He started to look agitated as he began to impatiently drum his fingers on his armrest.
Maria had had a taste of his volatile personality and she had no doubt that his threats were genuine. She thought of her children sleeping in bed as the bomb detonated and she shuddered. She wondered how she could send out a message to her husband to clean out the house and grounds. But for the time being she had no choice but to obey his commands. Without another word she stripped down and stood before him. He leaned forward on his seat and ran his hands over every inch of her naked body taking far longer than was necessary, his only intention being to intimidate and demean her. There was no need for this, for if she had indeed planted a tracking devise under her skin it would have been easily visible. After all the kidnapping happened less than six hours earlier and any fresh wounds would have been glaringly obvious.
“I just have to check and recheck everywhere,” he smiled impishly as he cupped her breasts for the millionth time.
“If you think I’m enjoying this then you must be raving mad. This is totally unnecessary and you know it. Are you finished now?” she responded coldly as she tried to push his hands off her.
His face instantly darkened with rage. “Don’t you dare use that tone with me. I can do whatever I want with you and there is nothing you can do to stop me. You had better start learning that fast. I am not Josh, giving in to your every plea. I haven’t stopped checking yet, turn around, spread your legs and bend over. I want to see what you have hidden down here.”
“You sick, sadistic pervert, take your hands off me,” she screamed as she tried to struggle out of his invading hands. But that was a very bad idea because it inflamed him even more. He hit her and sent her sprawling on the ground. He pounded her repeatedly and mercilessly until finally he put his hands around her neck and started choking her. Despite his mad fury, he spoke calmly and clearly.
“I will not remind you again of the bomb hidden inside your cottage. Next time I will just pick up the phone. You are going to do exactly as I say and be a good girl. The maths is simple, the longer you keep struggling the longer I’ll probe. I don’t think I can make myself any clearer than that. Do you agree?”
She stopped struggling and closed her eyes, enduring the tearing pain and humiliation. After what seemed like an eternity he calmly stood up and adjusted his tie.
“Get up and stand still,” he ordered as he kicked her flank. He sank down on his seat and leaned back comfortably. She slowly picked herself up. She felt very bruised and dizzy after that pounding but she didn’t dare complain. He just left her standing before him. He kept looking intimately at her, enjoying her discomfort as she tried to cover herself up with her long curls and hands. She felt stripped of all her dignity.
“That’s better,” he finally said. “We have an understanding now. You must know your place in life and treat me well unless you want to be humiliated and punished. I fear that Josh has let you have your way too much, you desperately need some discipline. He may have turned a blind eye to your insolence but that kind of behaviour will not be tolerated by me. Oh, wait, I did not tell you to sit down; I want to have a proper look at you. Stand still and stop being such a prude. Pull your hair back and clasp your hands behind your back. Show me what you’ve got. I SAID NOW. You were not so shy in front of Josh. Remember that I did watch you for over four years and you never thought twice about shoving all your assets in his face...you two-faced whore.”
“He’s my husband and you had no right to pry into what we did in our own bedroom.” She clenched her hands into tight fists but stopped herself from lashing out. Her deep anger could only get her into more trouble.
“I’m afraid I’m not the only one who enjoyed watching you prostitute yourself to my brother,” Freddie continued. “Those CDs were seen by hundreds of police officers...at least that is what Inspector Williams told me. He was kind enough to make a copy of some of my favourite ones before giving them back to you. He copied some for himself too. Those dirty movies kept him and his wife entertained for months. Oh, why are you surprised? Williams was handsomely bribed to narrowly miss catching me every time. How do you think I survived this long?”
That was why they could never pin Freddie down. The law was on his side. Thank God Josh hadn’t revealed the location of the island. She staggered towards the opposite seat, feeling faint.
“You can only sit when I tell you to sit. You have to keep on standing for now.”
She bit her lower lip. “Please Freddie, forgive me. I’ve learnt my lesson and I won’t do that again.
Please can I have my clothes back now?”
He stuffed her underwear in his jacket pocket and threw her jeans and shirt at her face. She tried hard to avoid his watchful eyes as she hastily put her clothes back on and meekly sat down on the seat opposite him.
“It is amazing how I can get you to do everything by just threatening to kill your husband and children. But you don’t know me at all. I will never kill my own brother unless I really have to. That would be too easy on him. I want him to live and know that you and I are sleeping together. That would truly eat him away. Eventually, he will find someone else and his previous life with you will be a forgotten past. You know Josh, it will take him less than a couple of months to feel the need of a woman inside his bed. When he does move on I will find another way to make his life a living hell again. Perhaps I can even get his new lover to live with you, I can set up a new harem, all with women Josh cares about, all used, abused and humiliated by me...” His face was suffused with hatred as he ranted on and on.
Maria looked down, saying nothing. She just let him vent his resentment.
Suddenly, for no apparent reason, Freddie’s handsome face softened and he was the friend Maria had enjoyed talking to many years ago, the Freddie who had come to her office and had poured out all his troubles to her as they discussed many complex medical issues. The bitter edge in his voice was booted out by this gentle and tender tone.
“...But I didn’t always hate Josh so much. I cannot imagine existing if he is not around, he is my little brother after all...and I have always wanted a brother. He even looks like me, the only difference being our colouring. Many even called us the fair and dark twins, our features being so uncannily similar. But that is not surprising, after all we do share the same father and our mothers were sisters. I have always hated and loved Josh at the same time.”
Freddie paused, took a deep breath and continued, “Maria, can you try to understand what it feels like to always live under the shadow of a younger brother, not even a brother, a bastard brother who outshines you in everything you do? I could never hope to achieve his grades however hard I tried, he remembered everything effortlessly within seconds and I had to work my socks off to try to keep up. We went to the same school and my dad could not help that jibe, that subtle comparison. I picked on Josh and used every opportunity I had to get him into trouble. Dad never took his side in any argument and Josh was always blamed and punished. But I knew that deep down dad loved him more, it was only guilt that made him act that way. Maria, please understand why half of me hated him so much, it means a lot to me if you understand what makes me turn into this hideous creature that I loathe so much. I didn’t want to do the things I did to you a while ago,” he said, looking at his hands and despising himself.
The Blake Soul Page 29
