I was so appalled at how he was acting. Like this was my fault.
I mean, it was technically my fault. I’d walked toward them and crossed whatever boundary made them turn into slithering demon beasts. But how was I supposed to decipher that? It was like I had no control over my body when watching their dancing. They’d lured me in like a moth to the flame, and I hadn’t been able to turn away.
“Some of the most amazing things can actually be deadly.” Zane looked up at me from his squatting position, gun loose in one of his hands. “You should always be cautious of beautiful things. Most are in disguise, waiting for you to slip up so the real darkness can finally have power over you.” His stare was like stone. “Don’t let them, even if you think it’s the only option you have.” When I didn’t respond, his tone got more demanding, imploring. “Promise me you won’t let them.”
How was one supposed to reply to something like that? He sounded absolutely insane.
“I-I just want to go back,” I said suddenly, done with this whole act.
Had he just brought me out here to give me philosophical advice, shove it down my throat, and almost get me killed to prove it? Peter would never do this to me. Peter would protect me. He was safe, and Zane was not, and I was tired of his influence on me. It felt like a major waste of time, and I had more important things to worry about than the “life lessons” Zane was trying to teach me here.
Sighing, Zane got up and shook his head. “Whatever you say, princess.”
Then we headed back into the dark once more, without another word spoken between us.
Twenty-Five
Lox tilted her head to speak to me. “Hey, you seen Zane this morning?”
Her question made my heart drop a little, thinking maybe she knew something about the night before. I shook my head a bit too quickly. “I-I think he left early this morning. He didn’t say where he was going.”
A nice breeze brushed over my cheeks as we trudged through the midday forest around us. Lox and I had gotten up this morning, readying supplies and ourselves for army training to begin later, leaving Peter behind in the care of the Lost Boys. Despite only being a flag bearer, the general insisted via letter that I learn a few techniques before he was fully comfortable putting me on the battlefield. And honestly, I couldn’t agree more. Maybe if I knew some moves, despite the absurdity of this whole situation, I might be able to defend myself if something were to go wrong.
And I had a very big feeling that was a strong possibility.
Lox blinked over at me again, squinting up at the sun breaking through the trees above us. “Did something happen last night? Before you came back to the tree?” She prodded, trying to read my face for any sign of the answer. I pressed my lips together, regretting it almost instantly when her face lit up. “You horrible liar! What happened?”
I sighed, letting my head fall back in annoyance. “Nothing happened!”
Lox crossed her arms over her chest. “Right. And pigs fly.”
I raised an eyebrow. “That’s a very stupid statement considering we’re in a place like Neverland.”
She rolled her eyes and smacked me on the arm lightly. “C’mon! You can tell me. I might be fake in the real world, but I still love a good bit of drama when I can get it.”
“It wasn’t anything like you’re thinking.” I curled my lip, appalled. “God, not anything like you’re thinking.”
Well, he had hugged me. But not for the reasons she would think.
“Just tell me,” she begged, sticking out her bottom lip. “Please? I won’t tell anyone.”
“He took me to a forest nymph ceremony.” I let out a breath of defeat. “And what first was really inspiring and nice turned into an attack. He had to use a gun to shoo them off.”
“Zane has a gun?” Lox’s eyes got wide. “That’s only available in the black market.”
“Yeah, he did. But that wasn’t even the freakiest part. It was what he said afterward.” There was deeper meaning behind our conversation the night before. But what? His words were just plain frustrating for someone who took everything logically and usually had a hard time thinking outside the box: me.
“What’d he say?” Lox questioned, moving along with me as we started to walk again. I shifted the pack farther up on my back so it wasn’t chaffing my shoulder anymore.
“‘You should always be cautious of beautiful things’” When her eyebrows furrowed, I nodded in agreement. “Right, exactly what I thought.”
“Do you think you know what he meant?” Lox peered over at me as I stepped over a large tree root.
I shrugged. “I have no idea. All I do know is he almost got me killed to prove some ridiculous point or something.”
After a moment of shared silence, Lox cleared her throat. “Lace, I know I said you didn’t need to know about some of the things I did…”
Raising my eyebrows, I glanced over at her, the sun momentarily blinding me. Talk about wanting sunglasses. “But?”
“Well, I found someone who might actually know what’s up with your dreams.”
Excitement and relief flushed over me all at once. “Seriously?” I shook her shoulder jerkily. “That’s amazing, Lox!” I was careful not to trip into a bush of thorns as we passed, looking over at Lox while hoisting up my backpack again. “Why didn’t you want to tell me?”
“I didn’t know I’d be able to find her. I didn’t want to get your hopes up if I failed.”
“But you found her?”
She nodded eagerly. “I did.”
“Do you think she really knows how to help me?”
When Lox opened her mouth to speak, a chorus of angry growls and shouting sprouted up unexpectedly before us. Now reaching the edge of the Neverland camp, my nerves, already on edge, did a flip-flop inside me when we saw the angry crowd bustling before the general’s tent.
“Excuse us. Excuse us,” I politely intervened as Lox just shoved her way through the other soldiers, our previous conversation momentarily forgotten. Creatures of all kinds angrily lashed out and shouted toward the center of the commotion. I followed Lox toward the front, where people were shoving each other to get a look at something.
A piece of paper mounted on the tent post.
Pushing into the small clearing where the general pondered, Lox rushed forward as I tried in vain to read the fancy cursive of the nice stationary placed for show, flapping in the wind.
The general, biting his fingernails now, turned to the furious crowd. “Will everyone just calm down?”
A roar of protest arose, and I stumbled back toward Lox as some of the general’s bodyguards held everyone else at bay. As I passed, Jack rubbed his head, mumbling, “This is worse than when the townspeople heard about the beanstalk.”
Lox was staring at the paper with deep concern as I finally was able to get closer and see it more clearly. I felt my heart dip in my chest as I read the words:
We attack three sun-ups from this day.
—Captain Jas. Hook
I turned to Lox. It was strange that Hook would reveal exactly when he planned to attack our army; he didn’t seem like the type to expose all his Christmas presents before the actual day he was supposed to open them. But then again, maybe that was his point.
Lox glared at the ground. “He’s trying to make himself seem more prepared than us. He doesn’t need to surprise us; he’s frightening enough this way.”
She turned to the general, still trying to compose his army, and cleared her throat. With a bellowing scream I never thought could come out of such a small body, the whole crowd began to get quiet. I leaned back with a frown, surprised by Lox’s loudness.
“Listen up, you jacks!” she shouted. “Standing here and whining like a bunch of shinbones won’t change the fact that we have a war to prepare for. Three days!” she hissed, smacking Jack on the arm. “And you’re all just doping around?” Her gaze traveled darkly over every soldier in the front row until finally she lifted her hand and gave them an expect
ant look. “Well? Get to work!”
There was a grumbling protest from the others, but in the end, the group began to sulk back to their duties.
General Jack ran his hands down his face. “This is disastrous.”
“Yep.” Lox agreed, stepping forward and shoving the general toward his tent entrance again, ignoring the note still fluttering there. “But you aren’t just going to stand here and show your soldiers you’re a scared namby-pamby. At least”—she literally propelled him inside his tent—“go inside to cry about it.”
When she turned back to me, she waved off my surprised expression. “Crowd control’s kind of my thing. I was head seat of the Founding Bear Community. One time, I really got into it with Princess Callisto, and well…” She grinned, wiping her hands together like the job was done. “Let’s just say I won that argument practically with just the tone of my voice. Now, let’s get started. We have a lot to do before you’re ready.”
We were heading for the makeshift mess hall. “Wait, are you training me?” I asked, thinking she’d talked to the general when I wasn’t looking.
She shrugged lightly. “Possibly. I mean, you don’t have to know that much. I’ve seen you fight, Lace. You just need to know how to get into that mode faster.”
“Are you serious? I can’t fight in a war. I’m sixte—”
“I’ve fought in plenty of wars, Lacey. It’s really all just…” Lox grabbed a plate, scrunching her face in thought. “Mental. You have to learn to shut everything out and just sort of…”
“Murder,” I inserted dully, shakily picking up my own wooden dish.
Lox thought about it for a second, frowning, then stepped along with the rest of the line to get food. Just the smell was making my mouth water profusely.
“Yeah, pretty much,” she answered finally as a large glob of slop was splashed onto her plate.
I grimaced at the sight of it. Okay, maybe the food smelled and tasted better than it looked.
It didn’t.
But as we sat down at a nearby table, Lox reconnected with some soldiers she’d known before the war, and I ate my nasty meal in silence. I was so scared of what was to come. And now that we only had a few more days before the actual bloodbath began—and I wasn’t even close to being ready—it just made things seem even more hopeless. I’d thought I’d be able to help with this, respect Peter’s wishes. But the more and more I let the thought roll around in my mind, the more fear started to get the best of me.
If I didn’t use the next three days to prepare myself for actual, gruesome war, I didn’t know if I’d live long enough to wake Peter.
And I definitely didn’t think I’d be able to make it back home.
“Lacey! Lacey!” someone shouted, holding me down to the bed. Still in the aura of the familiar dream, I kicked and fought, terror gripping every muscle in my gut and making my entire body shudder. My eyes flashed open as the pain from gripping my sheets became too much, and I gasped in realization. No cliffs, no Peter. No giant Hook. Just the top of the women’s tent billowing gray above me and Goldilocks’s worried expression looking down on me. “It was just a dream!” she whisper yelled, holding on to my struggling wrists tightly.
Letting out a cry of fear, I stopped resisting and covered my face shakily, trying to compose myself. It was dark around us, the other soldiers still asleep. If I’d disturbed any of them, they didn’t make any motion to show it. But I’d definitely been screaming, judging by the look on Lox’s face.
“Was it another nightmare?” she asked worriedly, sitting beside me on my bed in a sleepshirt much like mine, with long johns to match. Warrior attire, am I right?
I panted, sitting up to try and catch my breath as I nodded a response. The reoccurring dream was exactly the same as before, except this time, I’d watched Peter die in front of me. Terrifying.
Lox sighed and patted my kneecap. “You were shaking the whole cot.” She laughed uneasily, pointing up to the bunk placed above my head. I mumbled a sorry for her, too worked up to really say much else. When she noticed this, she got up to crawl onto her bed once more. “Well, go back to sleep for now; we have an early morning. You know that person I told you about? The one who knows about your dreams? She’s going to be here at dawn, and we should probably be rested for that.”
Lox got back into her squeaking bed to get comfortable as I rubbed my face again, trying to push the remnants of the dream from my mind. What had it meant, happening more than once? What had any of the dreams I’d had before ever meant?
Watch out for hope.
The sentence haunted me. It rang around my mind like a hamster on a wheel. That’s what these dreams did to me; they had no ending.
“Good night, Lacey,” Lox murmured from above.
Of all people, why did these dreams find me?
“Night,” I replied quietly, lying back and trying to relax now.
Why me?
“Get dressed,” Lox ordered, throwing a clump of clothes into my chest, causing a major case of déjà vu.
Groggily, I looked down at them, the sleep still not out of my eyes. The nightmares just had no mercy. I felt dead tired while sliding on the itchy combat pants and black tank top, like some female GI Joe or something. Lox kicked my old boots to me, thankfully, so not everything was different.
But, man, did it feel like everything else was.
The prewar life wasn’t as glamorous as I’d presumed it to be. After all, I was the flag raiser, wasn’t I? Special treatment had been my idea of what that position deserved. But to my disappointment, I was treated just like any other soldier here, just more so blatantly ignored. Obviously, none of them wanted to know I was just as much as I didn’t want to know them.
It was like high school on steroids.
When I was dressed, borrowing a brush for my hair from a lovely three-eyed lady who’d slept in the bed next to mine, I headed out to meet Lox at the mess hall.
With a groan, I saw the sun hadn’t even risen yet.
“Well, good morning, sunshine. Don’t you look as fresh as a spring chicken?” I heard a deep voice purr from behind me as I slowly placed a plate in my hand and tried to see what the meal was for the day. Turning, I couldn’t help but smile a little at the sight of Zane standing in an outfit similar to mine and the same sly smirk on his face.
“Could you be any more British?” I joked, turning back from him and receiving the nasty breakfast that didn’t smell as good today. Was that an eyeball?
Zane swerved in front of me before I could move along with the rest of the line, getting his food next and flashing me another smile. “Of course I could. I could talk about the queen or tea or even the time the bloody Red Guards almost laughed. I swear they did.”
I laughed despite the awkwardness hanging in the air around us. Last time we’d spoken, things had been less than ideal. But could you really blame me? I’d almost been forest nymph food. What did I even say to him after what had happened? Hey, thanks for almost getting me eaten to prove your point, I’m still terrified to look at campfires, but maybe we can still be friends?
We both looked at each other expectantly, and before I could say anything, Zane blurted, “I’m sorry. About the other night. You could’ve really gotten hurt, and I should’ve never put you in a situation like that.”
Was that… nervousness I sensed behind his words? For the first time, was Zane acting anything but cool?
“It’s not your fault. I should’ve listened.” Though it wouldn’t have helped, even if I had.
Zane’s eyes flickered around us uneasily before he gave me a weak smile. “So we’re all right, then?”
I nodded slowly, getting the last bit of food, an apple thankfully, and setting it on my plate. “We’re good.”
“Great,” he said too loud and then cleared his throat, slouching a little quicker. “I mean, cool.”
Shaking my head, I found myself stepping alongside him to a table where Lox sat with a few other soldiers. Before I could, th
ough, Zane grabbed my arm to hold me back, luckily soft enough so I didn’t throw my food.
“So now that we’re cool, could I take you somewhere? For lunch?” he asked, looking almost anxiously over at Lox, who’d spotted us and was waving us over.
Hesitating, I bit my lip while trying not to look up at him. “I don’t know, Zane. The last time you took me somewhere didn’t really end up the way you planned,” I joked, trying to lighten the mood. But Zane was completely serious, his grip becoming slightly tighter on my arm.
“Just, please.” His brown eyes watched me steadily. “Come with me.”
Inwardly, I felt like something about his delivery should have bothered me, but I reminded myself other people got nervous, too. But what about? What could Zane possibly be worried about?
Realizing I didn’t mind what the outcome was, I nodded. “Yeah, sure. I’ll come.”
“Well, all right. You don’t have to be so insistent, princess.” He winked before going to our table and sitting beside Lox.
Zane paused another time, though, stopping me just before our table again. “Oh, and by the way…” His eyebrows lifted in amusement. “I’m training you before lunch. Just thought you’d like to know.”
My heart skipped about two beats, but I just acted as calmly as possible, shrugged, and took a seat on the bench.
“Lacey! What took you so long?” Lox asked as she bit into a hunk of stale bread. My lip lifted as I looked at the green glob on my plate and decided it was probably best to follow her lead and stomach the bread first.
“Sorry, I’m not used to waking up at the butt crack of dawn,” I grumbled, pulling off some of the hard roll and popping it into my mouth. Fine dining at its best.
She rolled her eyes and reached across the table for the salt. “Whiny shinbone.”
A very noticeable hush fell over the dining area. Confused, I turned around to see where everyone was looking, only to find my eyes landing on a pretty older woman. She was dressed in a very sparkly floor-length gown, her long dress trailing out behind her as she stepped forward. We must’ve all looked like gum on the bottom of a dirty shoe compared to her.
Mere Phantasy Page 27
