“We will help him,” I said. “Do not worry.”
He smiled. “Yes. We will. It’s good that you’re here, Delia.”
I laughed to myself, thinking he might be the only one who truly believed that.
15
Spy
“Don’t tell me,” Tía Isabela said later when we were in the Rolls-Royce and being driven home, “that Jesse wants to be just pals with my son. I’ve always been suspicious of that Jesse Butler. He practically haunts our house and Edward. His family hasn’t been here that long. I have a feeling they moved from Orange County because of something dark in their family closet, something maybe related to him. He just looks…looks like the type.
“Of course,” she continued, “I want to believe the best about my son. Your children are a big reflection on you. You get blamed for everything they say and do. But I know peer pressure is usually stronger than parental pressure. You’re always judged by the friends you keep. Don’t forget that. It’s especially true in the circles I’m in. Everyone is eager to cast the first stone, and believe me, no one is without sin.”
She looked at me and nodded.
“You’d better learn that fast, Delia. You’d better grow a tough shell like I did. Yes, I did,” she said, nodding and looking forward again. “I don’t let people judge me. No one is better than I am, and I let them all know it, too. Why, the first time one of my so-called girlfriends laughed at my being born in some nothing village in Mexico, I jumped down her throat so fast she gagged on the words. That’s the way they are around here.” She turned back to me. “Everyone just loves tearing someone else down. They’re just jealous, all of them. Why, if any of these wonderful friends of mine got wind of something more going on between my son and Jesse Butler…”
She paused and kept herself facing forward, looking as if she was in very deep thought.
How could she keep them as friends if they were so eager to find a way to hurt her? Was she so desperate for friends, even with all she had?
She turned to me so suddenly it was as if she could hear my thoughts, but she was thinking about something else, something terrifying, in fact.
“Edward likes you, Delia. That’s obvious. He likes you, I hope, in a manly way, too. Don’t pretend you don’t understand what I’m saying, either,” she added quickly when I started to shake my head. “I never saw him get so emotional about anyone else. Why, he certainly wouldn’t run off to protect his sister like that, and despite what’s happened to him, he still believes he was right to do it. He has feelings for you, deep feelings.
“Stop shaking your head. You know as well as I do that first cousins can be more than cousins. In Mexico, it’s legal to marry your cousin. I see the way you look at him as well. The fact that he’s your cousin doesn’t stop that. You think he’s handsome, attractive.”
“He’s handsome, yes, but…”
“I know that look on a young girl’s face when she sees a good-looking young man. Believe me, I know.”
I shook my head more emphatically now.
“You don’t have to worry, Delia. I’m not angry about it, and I’m not asking you to do anything, actually, but since he obviously is drawn to you, I would like you to test the water for me.”
“I do not understand, Tía Isabela. Really. Test the water? What does that mean?”
She leaned closer, eyeing Señor Garman even though she was still cloaking her words in Spanish.
“I want you to tempt him sexually to see if he has any interest in girls at all.”
What was she suggesting?
“I don’t know what you mean, Tía Isabela.”
“Stop it! You know exactly what I mean. I’m sure you spent half your time back in that mud hut of a village teasing boys. Don’t play the innocent. I told you that before.”
“I did not tease boys. I do not play at being innocent, but what you are asking…”
“You’ll do it, and you’ll do it right away,” she said, making a plan in her head rapidly. “While his eyes are still bandaged. I’ll be there watching.”
“I am not pretending. I really don’t know what you want me to do, Tía Isabela.”
“Don’t you worry about it. I’ll tell you exactly what I want you to do. If I have to, I’ll draw you a picture.”
I was shaking my head again, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was talking and keeping herself faced forward.
“My husband would turn over in his grave if he thought there was even a suspicion like this about his son. He would take it far more personally than I would. The man personified testosterone. He had loose eyes. A female didn’t cross in front of him without him following the movement in her legs and hips, no matter what they looked like. I was competing with every woman he could see, smell, touch. And my genes aren’t particularly neutral when it comes to men and sex,” she continued. “Edward couldn’t have been bred any better if his parents had been Antony and Cleopatra. I’m confident that he wouldn’t be with such a boy as Jesse Butler if he wasn’t simply misguided, confused, maybe. He’s not outgoing with women or showing interest in them because he’s just unusually shy. That’s all. Eventually, he’ll get over it,” she said, now sounding like someone desperately trying to convince herself more than anyone else.
She glared at me.
“I won’t stand for it being anything else, but I have to know in order to…do something. Do you understand? I’m sorry it’s come to this, to where I have to use you, but my children have grown too secretive. I’m not stupid. I know they hide things from me.”
I didn’t know what to say. I know I was still looking at her as if I thought she had gone mad. It only made her angrier.
“I have a friend whose daughter is a lesbian. Everyone knows, but she pretends her daughter is just away, far away. She doesn’t mention her ever, but she looks…guilty about it. I won’t ever let anyone make me feel that guilty, that inferior. You’ll do just as I tell you,” she said, turning to me more fiercely. “Don’t cross me, Delia. I can make much trouble for you and your grandmother. I have friends in Mexico, high up in the government. You hear me? How do you think I got you here so quickly? I can pull strings, for good or for bad just as easily, and I won’t hesitate to pull them.”
Tears came to my eyes and choked my throat. I could barely breathe in this car filled with such rage and such threats. I nodded.
“Good,” she said. “Do what I ask, and you will be rewarded. Don’t do it, and you’ll regret the day you were born…almost,” she said in a near whisper, “as much as I did.”
My eyes nearly exploded. “Why?” I asked. “Why would you regret the day I was born?”
She was silent.
I thought she wasn’t going to answer, and then she turned to me again, this time more slowly, more deliberately, her eyes sharper, and said, “Someday, when you fall in love, if you ever do, you’ll understand.”
She said nothing more. We rode the rest of the way in a funereal silence, like the bereaved heading toward the realization of a grave.
Two days later, on Thursday, Edward was brought home while both Sophia and I were in school. Tía Isabela’s words and threats haunted me every night, but I was looking forward to seeing him. Jesse arrived to visit with him before either of us did and was in Edward’s room with him when I got home. As soon as I entered the house, my aunt greeted me at the door and told me so.
“They’re up there with the door locked,” she said, looking toward the stairway. “I was upstairs and heard the lock click. Why would two boys want to be in a room with the door locked? That Jesse wanted it locked, I’m sure, but don’t worry. I’m sure Edward will tell him to let you in.”
She took my arm and drew me closer to her, whispering now, even though there was no one nearby. Her eyes were so wide and full of fire I really did think she had gone mad.
“Observe every move between them, and try to listen to whatever they say. You’ve learned enough English to make sense of most things. I’ll be in my offi
ce reviewing some papers sent over by my business manager. Come see me as soon as Jesse Butler leaves or if you see or hear anything serious.”
“What about Sophia?”
“She’s out doing something no good. This morning, she told Casto not to come for her. She said one of her girlfriends would be bringing her home. That reminds me. I’d like to know exactly where she goes after school and what she does. See if she will tell you,” she ordered, and went to her office.
I felt as if I were spinning in my shoes. First, I was practically a persona non grata here, treated more like a leper than a relative, and then suddenly, I wasn’t sure why, I became my aunt’s secret confidante, her extended eyes and ears, peering deeply into the lives of my cousins, into the hearts and souls of her children.
I went upstairs as she had ordered, but I was hesitant about knocking on Edward’s locked door. I felt as if I were intruding. I imagined he would much rather spend his time with his friend and hear about all he had missed at school, but I did finally knock. Jesse opened the door just a little to peer out. When he saw me, he smiled with relief and opened it wide.
“It’s Delia!” he cried.
“Alone?”
Jesse looked past me down the hallway. “It appears so, Edward.”
“Good. Let her in, and lock the door again,” Edward told him.
Why did they have to lock the door, anyway? Jesse gestured for me to enter.
“Hey, Delia,” Edward called to me as soon as he heard the door close behind me and Jesse lock it again.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
He was in his bed, propped up against two very large pillows. His eyes were still bandaged, and although his facial burns and scrapes weren’t as red, they were still far from healed. He was wearing a pair of light blue pajamas, the top almost completely unbuttoned. I didn’t know he had a bad bruise on his chest until I saw it now.
“Cómo está, you mean,” Edward said. “We’ve been studying Spanish. Show her, Jesse.”
“I brought him this CD set of lessons in Spanish. We’ve both been listening to it and practicing.” He showed the disc to me, and I read what was written in Spanish on the cover. It was ten elementary lessons for the basic, necessary expressions. I handed it back to him.
“But now we have the real thing here, Edward. We don’t need this,” Jesse told him.
“Sí, correcto,” Edward said, and laughed. There was something unusual about the way both of them were behaving, I thought, and then I got a whiff of Jesse’s breath.
I quickly looked around and realized they were drinking tequila. The bottle and the two glasses were on Edward’s side table.
“You are drinking tequila?” I asked, pointing at the bottle.
“Discovered?” Edward said.
“We’ve hardly made an attempt to prevent it,” Jesse told him, and they both laughed. It seemed nothing anyone would say or do would not make them laugh. No wonder they had locked the bedroom door.
“Should you be drinking tequila, Edward? The doctor said it’s good for you?”
“Dr. Butler said so. Right, Doc?”
“Correcto,” Jesse said, and they both laughed again.
“Right now, it feels good, Delia,” Edward said, smiling. “Just trying to take the edge off. How do you think you say that in Spanish, Jess?”
“No idea. You understand what he said?” Jesse asked me. “What he wants to know?”
I shook my head.
“The tequila, it helps make him…it helps relax him,” he said. “He needs to relax, and so do I.”
“You?” I asked Jesse. Edward laughed, so I turned to him. “I do not understand, Edward.”
“It’s simple, Delia. He’s afraid of my mother,” Edward said. “Terrified of her, actually.”
I looked at Jesse. He had reason to be afraid of her, I thought.
“How do you say that, Delia?” Edward asked. “Cómo se dice en español, he’s afraid of my mother?”
“Él está asustado de su madre.”
“Yeah, right. Asustado. We’ll be speaking Spanish in no time, Jess.”
“You will, probably. You’ve got the tutor living here, with you night and day,” Jesse said. He sounded a little jealous.
“Exactly.”
Jesse looked at his watch. “I’ve got to get going, Edward. My uncle Joe is coming over for dinner tonight and bringing his newest possible long-term relationship.”
“Where did he find this one?” Edward asked.
“She just walked into his travel agency, and he booked her a trip she never forgot. He was her personal guide, if you know what I mean.”
They laughed again.
“I’ll sneak the tequila out,” Jesse said, and put it into his bookbag. Then he paused and reached for Edward’s hand. “See you,” he said.
“When?” Edward asked.
“I don’t know.”
“Cut school, and spend the afternoon with me tomorrow,” Edward told him.
“What? I don’t know if your mother will appreciate that.”
“She won’t be around, I’m sure. Just do it. I’m feeling much better.”
Jesse looked at me. Edward sensed it.
“She’s all right. She’s not going to go blab to my mother. Don’t worry. Just get your rear end over here.”
“I’ll try.”
“Try hard,” Edward said, still holding on to his hand.
Jesse glanced at me again. I pretended interest in Edward’s books and turned away. I didn’t want to see them do anything else, anyway. I thought they kissed, and then Jesse walked past me.
“See you, Delia,” he said, and unlocked the door. Just as he stepped out, we heard Sophia in the hallway.
“You moving in already, Jesse?” she asked him as she stepped up.
“I don’t think I could live under the same roof with you, Sophia.”
“I wonder why not,” she said, laughing at him. She saw me standing in the doorway and pushed past him to enter. Jesse looked back, shook his head, and continued down the hallway.
“Hello, idiot,” Sophia said to her brother.
“I wonder who that is,” Edward said. He pretended to sniff the air. “Smells like my rotten sister.”
“Funny, funny. I brought you something,” she told him, and went to the bed to reach for his hand. Then she dipped into her purse and pulled out what looked like two joints. “Don’t light up until I tell you,” she warned, and looked back at me. “You keep your mouth shut, Delia. It’s good for him. It will take away discomfort.”
Edward stuffed the joints under his pillow.
“You look like hell, Edward,” Sophia told him.
I closed the door softly but didn’t approach them.
“Thanks,” Edward said. “Actually, with my eyes bandaged, you never looked better.”
“Ha ha. You’ll probably have scars.”
“Thanks again, Sophia. You know how to make someone feel good.”
“I’m just telling you the truth. You’re always lecturing me about facing the truth.”
“Right. Forget it.”
“Bradley’s laughing at you,” she told him, and glanced at me. “He’s not a bit sorry about what happened.”
Edward was silent, but his face hardened.
“He’s going around school telling everyone you were just plain stupid believing what a Mexican girl told you. He’s making up other stories about you, too.”
“What other stories?”
“Telling everyone you have a thing for Delia, that she told him you were sleeping with her and you were simply jealous.”
“That bastard.”
“Exactly. And what has mother done about all this? Zip. She hasn’t even complained to the Whitfields.”
“Don’t worry. I’m down now, but I’m not through with him,” Edward said. “When I get back on my feet…”
“Good,” Sophia said.
Edward smirked. “What bothers you more, Sophia, what happened to
me or what he did with Delia?”
“Both bother me the same,” she said.
“At least she’s honest,” Edward said to me.
I wasn’t sure if I understood it all, but I could see Sophia was pleased.
“If you need me to do anything for you, let me know,” she told him.
“Is that really you being nice and considerate?” Edward asked her, and she laughed.
“See, Delia?” Sophia said to me. “I can’t be nice to my brother, either, without being doubted. You’re the only friend I have in this house now.”
Edward stopped smiling. “What are you up to, Sophia? How come you gave her your bracelet? You never took it off from the moment you were given it, and you flashed it so much you could have worked for the jewelry store.”
“I’m trying to change my selfish ways, Edward. I had a wake-up call,” she told him.
Wake-up call? I wondered. How does that change you?
He just laughed. “I’ll believe it when I see it, and that will be a while,” he told her.
“Whatever,” she said. She started out. “I have to get to my homework.”
“Huh? You worried about homework? You really are on some drug.”
“Very funny. I’ll see you later,” she told him, and paused next to me to whisper. “Come into my room later. I have exactly the dress you’ll want to wear to the fiesta. You just have to take it in a bit like you did with my other things. This isn’t old, either. It will just look better on you than it does on me, and I don’t wear it. Understand?”
“Yes,” I said, “but Tía Isabela is taking me to buy clothes this weekend.”
“What? My mother is taking you to buy new clothes?”
I nodded.
“I can’t remember the last time she went shopping with me. What’s got into her?” she wondered aloud. She looked very suspicious for a moment, suspicious enough to set my heart in a pitter-patter, especially when she looked a little harder and longer at me. Then she shrugged it off. “She’s probably just feeling guilty about it all,” she decided. “Still, I have a dress she would certainly not buy for you. It cost eight hundred dollars.”
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