by Serena Light
God, her eyes.
They were azure blue that shone in the lighting of the interior, specks of green scattered across her irises as they held determination and ambition in them. But most of all, it was all overpowered by the soft glow of concern shining behind the strength. The blue was still the same blue, but for some incomprehensible reason, they glowed like the dying embers of a hearth.
Perhaps it was the sincerity that was in her eyes, or maybe it was the concern she had, maybe it was the moistness of unshed and unwanted tears that had him say what he did.
Or maybe it was just...her that had him say what he did.
"Okay."
Arcangelo had one of the men retrieve his overnight bag form his car as he went and showered. He had to admit; the warmth of the water brought back the color of his skin and brought back his body temperature. Turning off the water, he wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped into the living room from where he could see Rosalie making a drink in her open concept kitchen.
Without saying anything, he walked over to the bag lying on the couch and took out some clothes he could wear. Pulling on his sweatpants he rummaged around for a shirt.
"You're done showering, great," Rosalie spoke with her back to him just as he found a t-shirt. "Here is your..." she trailed as she turned, catching him pull on the shirt, the momentary glimpse of him shirtless having her flush a deep pink as she turned away her gaze.
"Thanks." Arcangelo appreciated as he plucked the mug from her hand, making his way over to her sofa before settling down and taking a sip of the drink, a small smile making its way onto his lips at the familiar taste of the hot chocolate.
After a moment, Rosalie came and settled down on the couch as well, her knees pulled up to her chest with her back against the armrest, her position allowing her a clear view of Arcangelo's side.
They drank in silence as she observed him, a realization hitting her.
"I didn't know you had tattoos." She spoke like an intrigued little child.
Almost instantly, Arcangelo's movement halted as he glanced down at his inked skin, seemingly realizing that as well.
"Oh, yeah,"
"May I?" She inquired as she shuffled closer, putting down her mug.
Giving her a nod, she grasped his wrist in her hand as she looked at the tribal design in fascination. The other arm had a compass and arrow hybrid on the forearm.
Arcangelo looked at her intrigued expression for a moment before looking away, seemingly uninterested.
"They're..." Rosalie trailed as Arcangelo downed the remainder of his drink in one go. "They're very cool."
Halting for a moment, he glanced at her from the corner of his eye before acknowledging her words with a nod.
Another silence descended upon them as Arcangelo stared off into the distance, leaving Rosalie to admire his profile and ponder on her thoughts.
"You look sad." She noted quietly, also finished with her drink.
Arcangelo turned to look at her, one eyebrow raised as it was obvious he was thinking he heard her wrong.
"You look quite sad when you think no one is looking." Rosalie continued as she kneeled beside him. "It's okay to be sad, you know. Just don't let it get you down too much; there is a lot of things that can make people happy."
"My mom told me that it's good to be sad every once in a while. Sounds strange, I know. But look at it in this way; if you are sad, and you know how it all feels, you can appreciate everything in a greater light. I didn't understand it at first, but I get it now. It's even okay to break down and let yourself cry because tears just show how long you remained strong."
Rosalie smiled at him as she said those words, leaning forward she placed her palm against his prickly jaw, lightly rubbing her thumb over his cheek as she turned to look at his eyes. The ones that were a beautiful shade of cerulean blue, a color much deeper and richer than her own.
It always pained her to see them so...detached. Emotionless. Because she knew, that this man was capable of so much and felt so much, yet he never let it to the surface, always locked it away behind a stoic expression and a cold aura.
He terrified her.
But most all...
He made her alive with the simplest of touches. And that scared her.
"I was taught young how to be stone-cold, self-reliant, to hold myself high and poised, with a conniving mind and a manipulative tongue that could conquer the world," Arcangelo spoke lowly, causing Rosalie to be drawn into every word that left his mouth. Without warning, he pulled her forward, forcing her to straddle his lap as she stared at him with a gaping mouth and slightly wide eyes. "So I learned from early to only cry behind closed doors, on dim lights, without sound, to howl in pain silently, to break down without anyone knowing, and to never ask for help."
"Because when no one sees you suffering, do you really suffer? Much like, when a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? I can always just pretend that whatever pains me never happened, and I can always go back and face the world pretending I'm okay. Then why should I cry? Why should I allow myself to be sad? Why should I break down? It doesn't make sense, does it?"
"After all, feelings are nothing more than chemicals."
Rosalie stared at him in silence for a moment, the dimness of his eyes, all those hidden secrets, all that pain and sorrow, buried away and suppressed.
Why? Because feelings are nothing more than chemicals that are benign and meant to be passed off as nothing.
Wanting to prove him wrong, Rosalie connected her lips to his.
The suddenness of the action caught Arcangelo by surprise, but it didn't last for long before he responded. Deepening the kiss as he pulled her closer, her fingers slipping into his black tresses. A small groan escaped him as she pulled away, their faces flushed with their chests heaving and their eyes alight with everything and nothing.
"Tell me you felt nothing." She panted. "Tell me that this...did not make your heart race, your mind want more, did not make you react the way you did. Tell me it was all the work of chemicals and none of the desire."
Arcangelo stared at her in silence before she grabbed his hand, placing it against her chest as he looked at her in surprise. "Feel my heartbeat and tell me why it's so fast."
Suddenly, he noticed that her heart was racing. Rapid, quick, relentless. The beat rhythmic against his palm as he looked at his hand placed on her skin before looking up at her flushed expression.
And he realized why.
Why it was beating so fast.
Because of him.
Without warning, he stood up with her wrapped around his waist, her expression giving away the surprise and confusion she felt at his action as he walked them over to her bedroom
"Your heart may be beating fast." He growled lowly, gently laying her down on the mattress as she stared at him with shining eyes, her lips parting in anticipation as a small moan escaped her when he unbound her robe, resting his palm against her side, and leaning down to brush his lips against her's with every word that followed.
"But I want your heart to beat a lot faster for me."
Chapter XVIII: Drizzling Mornings
Darkened grey smudges of wool threateningly surrounded the sky; like a predator would encircle its prey. A startling low rumble rang loud in the cool fall air, the sky roaring with satisfaction. Trickles of liquid hit the ground with as much force as a small child. Hungrily, drizzles turn into canon fires, barricading everything in its way. A sense of cleanliness caresses the atmosphere, washing away all impurities.
A dense earthly sweet smell rises from the ground, enveloping everything within its soft embrace. The skies suddenly calm, as if it were comforted, coaxed even. The fluffy smudges don't part completely - although the sun peeks out timidly- and rather look like it's preparing for an even more vicious round.
Rosalie, however, only heard the sound of rain patter across her window as the wind hissed from between the small spaces. She generally loved t
he rainy days because after the shower there would generally be a bedazzling rainbow; but now, she couldn't care less about the earthly affairs.
All she could focus on at the moment was the man lying beside her. His knuckles caressing her cheek as his blue eyes, the ones that had been so detached and emotionless just last night, held unimaginable gentleness along with a sense of home reflecting on them. A content sigh escaped her as she nuzzled into his touch, her fingers drawing small patterns across his bare chest with her gaze locked to his.
This was the beginning of a lazy morning, they knew.
Neither one of them was willing to get out of bed or disturb the peace enveloping them. They didn't even have it in them to get dressed and make breakfast. They were just so unwilling to spoil their time together.
Moments like these were just so rare between them, that the cold and their hunger made it all worth it.
Arcangelo inhaled deeply as his fingers danced across the soft skin of her cheek, watching her eyes flutter to a close as her lips tilted into a soft smile. Slowly he moved to her jaw before running his thumb over her lower lip that was red and swollen from all their kisses. His fingers trailed lower to her neck, caressing the skin as she inhaled sharply at the liquid warmth that oozed through her.
A smirk made its way across his lips as he rubbed his thumb over the red mark he had left.
Rosalie took hold of his hand, interlacing their fingers together as he placed a kiss on her knuckles. Shuffling closer to him, he was quick to envelop her naked body against his, wrapping her tightly in his embrace as she nuzzled against his chest.
"What time is it?" Rosalie murmured quietly as her eyes drooped.
"Don't know," Arcangelo responded plainly as he combed his fingers through her hair.
"Stop that...you're making me fall asleep."
"Then sleep."
"But then you'll be gone when I wake up," Rosalie muttered as she moved closer to him, soaking up the warmth he radiated.
A sudden pang shot through him at her words. This wasn't the first time that they slept in the same bed, but this was the first time they 'slept together'. And Rosalie was right, whenever they would fall asleep together, Arcangelo would be gone before she awoke, something that had her feel a sense of loss.
"I'm not going anywhere," Arcangelo assured as he placed a kiss on the top of her hair.
"Promise?" Rosalie inquired curiously, looking up with her wide doe eyes, looking at him expectantly. His heart melting at the innocent look she was giving him.
"I promise." He reassured as he placed a kiss on her hand that was interlaced with his, both of them close to drifting off.
They would have fallen asleep if it weren't for the sound of her doorbell resonating through the apartment.
"Goddammit." Arcangelo groaned as Rosalie shifted, seemingly about to get out of bed to check.
"No, don't go." He halted her movement by wrapping an arm around her waist, pulling her back against his chest. "They'll leave soon enough."
She didn't protest as she relaxed against his chest, both of them waiting for the commotion to die down. Just when it all stopped, Rosalie's phone lit up with a text. Reaching for it, she read the message with Arcangelo looking over her shoulder, another groan escaping him as they realized it was her friend Maria at the door.
"I don't like your friends very much at this moment." He confessed as he watched her roll out of bed and pull on his black t-shirt form the night before.
"Yeah, but who knows, maybe it's something important." She shrugged as she started to make her way towards her bedroom door.
"Bullshit."
"Language,"
"I could have said the same thing to you last night, Ms' Dirty-talker."
"Shut up."
"Language,"
Arcangelo chuckled as he watched Rosalie walk out of the bedroom, leaving him alone as she went to cater to her friend.
A slight shiver went through her as the cold air blew at her bare legs. Rubbing away the sleepiness in her eyes, she unlocked her doors before swinging it open to greet her best friend with a smile. However, her smile faltered as she shrieked at the sight of the boy beside her.
"Dante!" Rosalie exclaimed as her cheeks flushed and she tried to cover up more with the large shirt she was wearing.
She noticed how his eyes took her in, starting from her head going down to how the shirt exposed one shoulder and dipped low. She felt exposed, to say the least.
"Rosalie, princess," She heard Arcangelo call from behind her as she noticed Dante tense up. "You forgot your robe." With that said, he helped her pull it on as she fastened it in place, noticing how her friend shuffled uncomfortably, looking around aimlessly as Maria grinned at the two in the doorway.
"To what do we owe this pleasure?" Arcangelo inquired flatly as Maria and Dante walked through the door.
"Ah, we were in the neighborhood and thought we'd drop by." Maria shrugged as Arcangelo wrapped an arm Rosalie's waist, pulling her towards him. "Why? Is this a bad time?"
"Yes." He stated firmly as Rosalie gaped at him, clearly taking offense in his bluntness. "Yes, this is a bad time."
"Oh." Maria's smile faltered as she shuffled her feet. "Well, do you want us to leave?"
"No!" Rosalie exclaimed just as Arcangelo said 'yes'. "Arcangelo!"
"Well, I want to take you somewhere and I can't stay for long." He spoke as he looked down at her. "Besides, this is the last you'll be seeing me for a couple of weeks."
"What?" Rosalie instantly choked at his words, pulling away. "Why?"
"Because I won't be around." He said cryptically. "I'm going to America."
"Oh."
"You know what? I just remembered we have to be somewhere." Maria spoke in haste, grabbing hold of Dante's wrist as she dragged him towards the door. "We'll call you."
Rosalie hardly registered what they had said until the door closed behind them.
Blinking away the daze, Rosalie stepped away from Arcangelo's hold while he let her. Wrapping her arms around herself, she tried to gather her thoughts.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Because I found out just now." He stated. "Before leaving I wanted to show you something, and I don't think it can wait any longer."
"Okay." She swallowed, rubbing a hand over her face. "Okay. Let me just get dressed, and we can leave."
Going to freshen up, Rosalie walked in on Arcangelo standing in a three-piece black suit with a white undershirt and his hair styled and gelled to the side. She gaped at him silently as he smirked at her and took in her attire. She wore a floral pink dress with a white cardigan over her attire.
"Let's go?" He asked as he opened the door for them.
Grabbing her bag and placing her essentials into it, she followed him out and into his car.
The rain had stopped and there was only very light drizzle with puddles on the sidewalks and water droplets painting the windows and building around them.
Rosalie asked where they were going and all she got in response was silence. It made her uneasy, not because of the lack of conversation between them, but because of the way his eyes had gone dead again. She didn't like it when they became like that in her presence, it always meant something bad.
She shuffled in her seat as Arcangelo parked the car, looking around them, she noticed them be standing before a cemetery. Swallowing thickly, she watched him get out of the car and gestured for her to do the same. Inhaling deeply, she stepped out and followed after him as he entered the cemetery through the rickety old gate.
Rosalie felt awfully out of place in her floral dress amongst the numerous tombstones.
Glancing up, she realized they were approaching a man in a charcoal suit, seemingly waiting for them.
"Vincent." Arcangelo acknowledged with a nod as they stood before each other, the man, Vincent nodding in response.
"So you brought her along?" He stated as he seemed actually surprised.
"Why are we here?" Rosalie asked in dis
comfort. Graveyards always made her feel uneasy, she didn't like the eerie feeling they brought with them.
"XI-IV-MMVI," Arcangelo stated as Rosalie looked at him in confusion. "That's the tattoo on my shoulder, and you asked me what it meant."
"It's a date. 11th April 2006. I was 24. And it was the first time I killed someone." Rosalie stared at him in silence, knowing that he had killed people before, but hearing it from his own mouth just made it all seem a real. "And I killed them." He continued as he gestured to the tombstones.
Shifting her gaze down, she read the names displayed. 'Helen Afanti Regnante. 'Onofrio Dante Regnante. Ellie Hope Avery. Antonio Mateo Regnante.
"My family," He stated quietly as Rosalie stared at him in disbelief, not understanding why. Her mind reeling as she felt nauseated. "If whatever it is between us, is meant to progress, I want you to decide and I want you to know everything before you decide."
Tears welled up in Rosalie's eyes as she stared at him. He couldn't even meet her gaze, he was just staring at the graves before him, the graves that were there because of him. His own family.
"For fuck's sake!" Vincent choked through gritted teeth, pulling Arcangelo back as he stood before Rosalie, his eyes bloodshot and moist with the unshed tears. "No matter what we tell him, he won't believe us! We have all tried telling him repeatedly that he couldn't have known!"
"Vincent-"
"No! Rosalie, every year all Mafia Boss's come together for a charitable auction, and they are allowed to bring two guests with them. Helen and Antonio were Arcangelo's parents. Other than that, his elder brother and his wife--Onofrio and Ellie--Arsenio's parents were invited. On the night of the auction, they all suggested that they stay home, but Arcangelo insisted that they go. He just wanted to spend time with his nephew! And he couldn't have known! He didn't know! But there was an attack on the building and everyone was shot down! It's not his fault! Tell him it's not his fault!"
"I told them to leave! I insisted that they go! If I hadn't been selfish they would all be alive today!" Arcangelo retaliated, his voice sounding hoarse and strained as his eyes shone with the emotions he felt, his impassive mask cracking.
