‘Erm. I’m r-really not—’ she stammered, flailing for an answer.
She was saved from a reply by a desperate shout from the chef. ‘Sam! Any idea if someone got any cranberry sauce?’
‘Sorry, ’scuse me. Catch you later,’ Sam said, already part way across the kitchen. ‘Coming, Gabe!’
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Scarlett and Jude had been chatting to some of the guests while they tucked into nibbles and fizz. Anna had offered to drive home so her daughters could relax and join in with the party. Taking their Christmas down to the pub had been the best idea Scarlett and her family had had in ages. They’d found it fascinating and moving talking to people about the reasons they’d decided to join the lunch.
There were people who’d lost loved ones, others who couldn’t get home for Christmas for various reasons, and a recovering addict who’d recently managed to get off the streets and into his own flat, but was still estranged from his relations. At least, thought Scarlett, she was still in touch with and knew she was loved by her family, even if they were splintered.
‘Some of their stories put all our family problems into perspective,’ she said while helping Jude load presents into a sack for the guests. They’d all been donated by local businesses.
‘Yes, same here. You never know who’s going to turn up or what their reasons are. Christmas is a very tough time to be alone.’
‘Or to be with your family …’ Scarlett said. ‘At least no one’s made such a dramatic entrance as I did last year.’
‘There’s still time. We haven’t had the turkey yet.’ Jude laughed. ‘I’m glad you did make an entrance, despite the awful circumstances.’
‘You must have thought I was mad.’
‘No. Just lost. Everyone loses their way sometimes. Everyone can be lonely, even in the middle of a crowd – especially in the middle of a crowd. We don’t know what life’s going to throw at us and if our luck turns, we could end up here one day.’ He gave a wry smile. ‘Or choose to be here, like me.’
‘At least you’ve ditched the elf hat this year. That’s who I knew you as until we met again: the elf man.’
‘Oh God, did you?’
She touched his ears. ‘Yes, but don’t take it too hard. I still thought you were uber-cute.’
‘Uber-cute?’
‘Not at first, of course. But you grew on me.’
Jude was about to kiss her when the music stopped, a fork tinged against a glass and Sam Lovell spoke up. ‘Sorry to interrupt the merriment, folks, but I’m delighted to announce that dinner is served. Please take your places.’
Reluctantly, Scarlett peeled herself away from Jude, because it was an unspoken tradition that the helpers scattered themselves among the guests who might not know anyone. She chose a seat between a middle-aged lady from Porthmellow who’d lost her elderly mother earlier that year, and a Kiwi student who couldn’t get home for Christmas.
The eclectic mix of people reminded Scarlett a little of the crowd at the swimming baths in Brum. She made a vow to keep in touch more often and go to the annual get-together they always had. The thought led her to introduce the topic of swimming to the conversation, and soon she’d persuaded both the older lady and a student to watch the Boxing Day swim, if not to actually go in for a dip.
Loud voices from the other side of the table came from a young woman in a metal T-shirt in conversation with a skinny young man with a straggly beard, gold earring and a fisherman’s cap not dissimilar to Troy’s.
‘What are Bryony Cronk and her bloke doing here?’ Scarlett asked Sam when she came round with bottles of wine. Bryony’s contempt for community events was well known throughout the town.
‘Apparently, she and her new boyfriend were looking for an excuse not to have lunch at his brother’s place. Sacha hates the brother’s pug and so the brother insisted Sacha had to stay at home all day. Well, you can imagine how that went down with Bryony, so they both volunteered to help. Not that they’ve set foot in the kitchen yet …’ Sam said, nodding at Bryony who had her arms wound around her fisherman. Sacha lay under a table, gnawing a huge piece of rawhide that looked like something from a crime scene.
‘I can’t believe Sacha isn’t barking or trying to snaffle the turkey,’ Sam said. ‘Though there’s still time.’ She smirked. ‘So far, he’s been bribed with a bowl of luxury turkey dog food and a massive dog chew.’
Scarlett laughed, feeling more cheerful than she had for ages, although she was always mindful of not having her father around, and of Ellie’s unhappiness. Poor Ellie, she was trying to put on a brave face, as was her mother. She felt helpless again, but tried to think of all the people in far worse situations.
Crackers popped and ‘ohs’ and ‘ahs’ filled the room as Gabe and Ellie carried out platters of turkey and steaming veg and trimmings. Eventually, after the almost endless passing of serving dishes, everyone seemed to have groaning plates when the pub door opened.
A man stood in the doorway, looking around, unsure.
Scarlett turned and a few faces glanced over at the newcomer too, but most people were too busy eating or laughing.
Jude scraped his chair back. ‘Oh, we have a latecomer. He looks lost.’
‘I know exactly how he feels.’ Scarlett stood up too. She put her hand on Jude’s arm. ‘I’ll take care of him.’
She walked over to the door, her legs not quite steady. ‘Dad?’
‘Your mother said I’d find you here.’ He kissed her and Scarlett hugged him, half afraid he might be a figment of her imagination.
‘But … but when did you arrive in Porthmellow?’
‘Last night. I stayed in a B and B. I decided I couldn’t miss Christmas Day with you after everything that’s happened this year.’
‘I can’t believe you’re here … Mum said she’d gone on a secret mission yesterday. Did she know about this?’
‘She might have. She called to see me yesterday.’
Scarlett glanced around the room, seeking out Anna and Ellie. They were standing together by the kitchen and even from across the room Scarlett saw their eyes shining. ‘So, you’ve been to Seaholly Manor already?’ she said, in wonder.
‘Yes. I arrived shortly after you left. Your mum asked me to come round this morning and when I arrived, she told me you were all coming here. They persuaded me to come and so I thought: why not? I didn’t want to disrupt your plans and I know how kind everyone was to you last year.’
‘So you’re staying with us tonight?’
He smiled. ‘If there’s room and you’ll have me.’
‘Oh Dad. I’ll sleep in the garden if it means you’ll stay.’ She threw her arms around him again and he hugged her tightly. His embrace was almost too much to bear after so long apart.
‘But what about Marcus? Don’t he and Heidi mind you coming down here?’ she asked.
‘I’ve been able to spend plenty of time with him and the family lately, and when he heard I wanted to come down here to talk things over with your mum, he was right behind the idea. We’ll meet up when they get back from skiing for a second Christmas.’
Scarlett nodded, grateful to Marcus and co. for understanding how much she, Ellie and Anna needed Roger’s presence. ‘Dad, there’s someone I want you to meet.’ She beckoned Jude over.
‘Jude. This is my dad,’ she said, aware of exactly how much those words meant. ‘Dad, this is Jude.’
‘Good to see you,’ he said, shaking Jude’s hand.
‘Will you sit down to dinner with us, Mr Latham? We’ve only just started the main course.’
‘If you’re sure you have enough food, I’d like that very much. But for God’s sake call me Roger.’ He smiled.
Scarlett had half-expected her father to politely decline and say he was going back to the manor. Public events weren’t his thing at all so she knew that he must be staying for her sake, which made her want to cry all over again.
‘OK, I’ll find you a place with the rest of the family, Ro
ger.’
Her mother and Ellie waved at her from the opposite side of the table, and Scarlett showed her dad to the table. A few people gave them curious glances but soon went back to their turkey and cracker jokes. After all, the arrival of a stranger in the middle of Christmas dinner was nothing new or unusual.
‘Thanks for coming,’ Scarlett said while the chairs were shuffled to allow her dad to squash in beside her at the table.
‘How could I miss Christmas Day with my daughters?’ He squeezed her hand and Scarlett almost wept into the cranberry sauce jug being passed to her by the student next to her.
Her dad picked up a cracker, and Scarlett pulled it, the pop, as always, making her jump. Roger pulled out a pink crown and put it on his head.
Across the room, while her dad was helping himself to some sprouts, she caught Jude’s eye. He was smiling and raised his glass to her. He mouthed, ‘To you,’ and she whispered back, ‘You too.’
A couple of hours later, the Lathams were sent home, having been sternly prevented from staying to wash up after they’d helped clear away. Scarlett could hardly believe she could have had such a happy and uplifting time at a Lunch for the Lonely, but now she’d become hungry for some private time with her family.
The sun was slipping rapidly towards the horizon as Jude kissed her goodbye outside the pub. Her father was inside thanking the landlady and the volunteers for their hospitality, while Ellie and her mum had already set off for the manor.
She held Jude’s arms, feeling happy but exhausted. ‘Thank you,’ she said to him.
‘What for?’
‘For being here. Just for being you and being here.’
‘A pleasure. You have a lot to talk about. I hope it works out for you all.’ He kissed her softly on the lips. ‘Call me whenever you’re ready.’
‘I will.’
She let go of him, reluctantly, but knowing he’d be there for her whenever she needed him.
‘Wait!’
He jogged after her. ‘I guess you won’t be doing the Boxing Day swim tomorrow now? I’ll understand if you can’t.’
Scarlett put her finger on her lips as if she was considering, then burst out laughing at his downcast expression. ‘You try and stop me.’
She sat in her father’s car watching as dusk fell over Porthmellow and the Christmas lights twinkled and the cottage lamps came on, giving the little town a fairy-tale feel. The stars came out in the clear sky over the sea. Her father didn’t start the engine, probably aware, as she was, that now was their only chance for some private time before they were reunited at the manor with Ellie and her mother.
‘Dad. It’s so wonderful that you’re here. There’s nothing I – or Ellie – want more than for you and Mum to be happy again. But …’ She took a deep breath. ‘I don’t want you and Mum to stay together – wallpaper over the cracks – just to have a perfect Christmas with me. None of us would want that.’
‘There will be no wallpapering. The cracks haven’t got any wider. In fact, I’d say they were narrowing. We want to try and rebuild our lives. Your mother came to me yesterday. We talked for a long time. I know what happened and who he is. I won’t deny I was angry and upset all over again, but I also take my large share of the blame.’
‘If I hadn’t bought that bloody test, none of this would have happened.’
‘Maybe. Maybe not. Perhaps we would have found out another time. In the heat of an argument … or another way. Too late to turn back the clock.’ He picked up her hand and held it. ‘You haven’t split the family apart, love. You bought that test in complete innocence. It’s because you loved me and Mum – all of us – that you wanted to make our Christmas perfect. The trouble is that nothing and no one can ever be perfect. The way I behaved towards your mother after she had Marcus wasn’t even kind, let alone perfect. I was blind to anything except my job and making ends meet day to day, and I missed what she was going through.’
‘Poor Mum. Poor you.’
‘You’re the one who’s been at the heart of the fallout. I love you, Scarlett. I’ve told you before that I do. It was such a shock when I first found out about the test. It hurt all the more because I loved you so much. I’m deeply sorry for every single second that you didn’t feel as loved by me as you did the day you were born.’
There were tears in his eyes.
She reached over and held him. ‘Dad. Can you stop this, please?’
‘Why?’ he frowned.
‘Because you won’t be able to drive home if you start crying.’
‘Your driving has always made me cry.’
‘Dad!’ She batted his arm and they both started laughing through their tears and they were still laughing as he drove them back to the manor.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Late on Christmas evening, Ellie and Scarlett lounged in easy chairs in the snug. They each had a glass of Jude’s cherry brandy, which he’d squirrelled away for the Latham family as a gift.
After they’d arrived home, they’d all talked together then left their parents alone in the sitting room. Marcus was fully aware of what had happened and so they had all Skyped him, Heidi and the boys. It had been a happier half hour than anyone could have hoped for. The boys were delighted that Nanny, Grandad and their aunties Scarlett and Ellie were all together and smiling. Marcus’s relief at peace breaking out was obvious in his jovial manner, probably fuelled by lots of the good wine he liked to save for Christmas Day. Even Heidi had been smiling and on her best behaviour.
Ellie watched the glow of the snug fire, listening for the dull roar of the surf as the tide ran high up the cove. She wondered if Aaron was at the cottage or was still at his parents’ place, or even with Liza, and if he was, was there even the remotest possibility of them getting back together? Seeing them looking so comfortable together in town had been a big blow. She’d also felt jealous, even though she’d told Aaron they were over.
‘You know, sitting like this by the fire, we could be two old spinsters from Victorian times,’ Scarlett broke into her thoughts.
‘Nothing wrong with being a spinster. Auntie Joan had a fantastic life. She travelled the world, had lots of lovers and made enough money to buy this place doing what she adored.’ Ellie smiled, grateful for the distraction from her churning mind.
‘True. Let’s raise a glass to her.’ Scarlett chinked her glass with Ellie’s.
‘To Auntie Joan!’ they declared in unison.
Ellie allowed the brandy to fill her mouth and slide down slowly. Its sweet taste had a surprising after kick.
She swished it around her glass, admiring the jewelled colours in the reflections from the fire. ‘You can tell Jude that this is really very good.’
‘Isn’t it? Shame it’s the last one. It was a Christmas present.’
‘Weren’t you supposed to be spending the evening with him?’
‘He doesn’t mind. Neither do I. I need to be here with you and Mum and Dad, and Jude is the first to understand that. Anyway, I’ll be able to make up for lost time after Christmas.’
‘You’re happy here, then? Planning to stay?’ said Ellie, noting the glow in her sister’s eyes.
‘Yes … even if Mum sells the house, well, Jude has offered to let me stay at his. Not that I’d ever leave you, of course.’
Ellie laughed, amused and touched by Scarlett’s loyalty. ‘That’s a lovely thought, but if I were you and Jude asked me to move in with him, I wouldn’t hesitate.’ She knocked back a larger gulp of brandy than she’d meant to and gasped as the fiery liquid seared the back of her throat.
‘What about you and Aaron?’ asked Scarlett.
‘What about me and Aaron?’
‘Have you thought that maybe, you should talk to him? You said yourself he’d admitted he’d lied about the marriage and made a huge mistake in not telling you about Liza. Could you ever think about forgiving him?’
‘Yes, I’ve thought about it.’ Ellie’s thoughts slid to her phone and the unanswered messages
from Aaron. ‘I need to think about it a whole lot more before I trust myself to speak to him.’ She took a breath. ‘Actually, I saw him with Liza yesterday.’
‘Jesus, no. Where?’
‘They’d been shopping in town. It was only a glimpse but he’s obviously been talking to her.’
‘Oh, Ells. Perhaps it was about the divorce.’
‘That had crossed my mind, but unless and until I can bring myself to speak to him again, I’m never gonna find out, am I?’
‘You need to do it, Ellie. It was horrendous when I had to tell Jude why I’d gone cold on him and, to be honest, I made a right mess of it. But it was better to get it out in the open, just like everything else between us all. It won’t be easy, but think about going to see him. You’ll never know if you don’t try.’
Ellie smiled. ‘Since when did you get to be big sister with all the good advice?’
Scarlett laughed. ‘I’ll make the hot choc.’
Scarlett went into the kitchen, leaving Ellie cradling the last of the cherry brandy. She was thrilled that Scarlett was happy with Jude and was coming to terms with the revelation that Julian Mallory was her father, as Ellie herself was trying to do.
As for her parents, they were at least together in the same room, when for many weeks they hadn’t even been in the same county. They’d been honest with each other and were talking, so while this year was very far from a perfect Christmas for any of them, it was way better than the last one. Everyone in the family was in a better place, except perhaps her – having found Aaron and lost him. However, if that was all that life was going to give her family, she would live with that. She had to.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
‘R-remind me again why I ever agreed to this?’ Ellie hissed to Scarlett, tugging her fleecy dressing gown tighter around her frozen flesh.
They were standing on Porthmellow Beach surrounded by other people who appeared to have gone completely bonkers. Some wore wetsuits, others were already stripped for action, jogging up and down in vintage bathing suits and – Ellie’s eyes hurt – Speedos that should have been thrown in the bin decades before. Some of the flesh on display was epic, wobbling like a blancmange and paler than the bread sauce they’d served up with the turkey.
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