by Kat Cameron
While sitting there waiting for the nurse to get me whatever information she could, I remembered there was almost the whole club sitting there waiting with me. Stana was chewing on her nails while Crow was rubbing her back, and the rest of the guys were doing the same thing I was. The entrance to the hospital slid open and in swooped a hurricane of a small woman—that woman being Lydia—demanding to know what was going on with her son. Her whole body was stiff but she showed nothing but the strength of a determined woman. Snake was next to her, shaking his head while she was at the nurse’s station making a scene. I heard a gasp next to me and realized Stana just figured out that Rage is her half brother. Shit, that was going to be another big mess.
“You realize that man over there that has been pestering you with questions might as well be his brother, right? All of these men are his brothers and you haven’t given them one inkling of information about him. Is this really the policy you hold here?” She was pissed. Understandably so since she didn’t have any answers yet.
“I understand, ma’am, and while I appreciate the bond your son has with these men, I am legally not allowed to give information out. Now that you are here let me go find out how he is doing.” The poor nurse scurried away like a disciplined child while Rage’s mom huffed and turned to sit with the rest of us. She went to sit on the other side of Stana and Snake stood like a sentry next to her. There was definitely something more going on with them.
As soon as she sat down, a nurse came down the hallway pushing a wheelchair holding Riley in it. Damn, I was so relieved to see her. I knew she wasn’t hurt like Rage was but the thought of her hurting at all and not being able to do anything about it was the worst form of torture there was. Everyone got up at once to go and hug her. I waited my turn, rather impatiently, but when I finally got her in my arms it was like coming home after a hard day and seeing the smile on her face. I smashed my mouth to hers in a bruising kiss. I didn’t care who saw, I just knew I couldn’t go another second without kissing her.
She gave back everything I was giving her and opened her mouth for me. Sliding my tongue along hers was everything I never knew I needed. Her nails were digging into my skin and she let out a little moan. I went to put my arms around her back to pull her into me when she let out a moan of discomfort. I pulled away and looked at her but there was a shadow in her eyes that wasn’t there before.
“You okay, baby?” I asked. She nodded but her eyes were glassy as if I caused her pain. I didn’t notice anything wrong with her back but maybe JP did something to her that I didn’t notice. She whispered the word “later” so I took her hand and we went to wait with everyone else.
About half an hour later, the nurse finally came back out and called for the family of Declan Myers. It was strange hearing Rage being called by his actual name. It wasn’t something I was used to hearing. Lydia got up and went to the nurse but the nurse looked around at all of us only standing a couple steps behind her.
“Whatever you need to tell me, you can tell me here. They are his family just as much as me. Now get on with my son’s surgery.”
“Right. When the bullet hit his shoulder it hit an artery and he lost a lot of blood. That needed fixing up and he needed some blood as well. His shoulder will need some time to heal, but as long as he takes care of it properly he will be fine. He is being moved to a room now and you all will be able to visit him soon. We are going to keep him overnight for observation. Although visiting hours are over we are going to allow you to see him, but only for a short while. I will come back and let you know when it is time.”
Everyone was a little bit more relaxed now that the nurse had assured us Rage would be fine. Though the longer I sat here, the more I thought. I thought about what it meant that I loved Riley. I thought about what it meant that she was willing to die for me tonight. She was willing to take herself and Reese to the grave as long as it meant other men she barely knew didn’t die. I would make sure she knew she was loved every single day if it meant doing it for the rest of my life. A sniffle broke me out of my thoughts. I looked over to see Riley swiping a tear away from her cheek.
“Baby, what’s wrong?” I cradled her face in my hands while caressing the apples of her cheeks with my thumbs. She shook her head and a sob broke out. Shit. I picked her up, being mindful of her leg and her back. Her whole body shook as the sobs tore through her. They sounded like they were ripping her soul to shreds and stitching it back together. I held her while her demons were tearing through her soul. I would be here for her as long as she needed. Standing right by her side and fighting them alongside her.
I don’t know how long we stayed like that. Her rocking in my lap, sounding like she was begging for her pain to stop. It could have been an hour or it could have been a few, but I wouldn’t have changed it for anything. Next thing I knew the nurses came out and told us we could go see Rage. That snapped Riley out of her inner battle. Seems as though she may have forgotten about her injuries for a few seconds because she jumped out of my lap so quickly she almost collapsed onto her face.
“Woah. Easy there, tiger. You are hurt, babe. You gotta take it slow. Why don’t we let everyone else go see him first and then we will go in last? Your mom should probably go in first. Speaking of which, why don’t you go have a talk with your sister since she just found out about Rage? She is probably going to need you.” I explained.
“Doubt it, when she finds out that I have known for years already,” she whispered. Yeah that was going to be something else, but that was something for all of them to figure out. I know Rage said their mom wanted to be the one to tell her but I don’t think she meant like this. As it was, I helped her hobble over to her sister and found another seat to give them some privacy. Crow got up from his seat after giving Stana a kiss on the forehead and followed me to my seat.
“You think Stana is going to be mad at Riley for this?” I asked Crow. He shook his head and ran his hands down his face.
“Honestly, I am not sure. She has been through so much lately she might just not give a shit that a few other people knew before she did. At the same time, she might see it as a betrayal from Riley since she knew they were friends when they were younger. Who knows these days though? Those fucking pregnancy hormones are driving her so out of whack, it’s a hit and a miss with her.”
As he said that I got the weirdest picture of Riley pregnant with my baby in my head. Her face was a little more round and she was wobbling like a penguin while chasing down another baby. Shit, that sounded fucking amazing. I couldn’t even believe that I was imagining this after everything that just went down, but now I couldn’t unsee it. I would make sure to see the day when that actually happened. I would accept nothing less.
“You just got a weird ass look on your face, brother. You alright? Did they slip you some drugs over at the nurse’s station?” Crow asked. Then he got distracted when the girls started sniffling and hugging each other. Thank fuck that was all fine and dandy. One less thing we would have to worry about. Not that it would be a big deal. I could understand if Stana was upset. Although, I did just fucking shoot my brother dead, so was I really one to judge?
That was a whole other thing I would need to deal with. Shit, I might need to talk to someone about it considering I wasn’t feeling much about it at all. Did I want to do it? No, I didn’t. Was it going to give me fucking nightmares? Probably. Was I going to have to make sure Riley isn’t going to hate me for it? Definitely. But that was a problem for later. Right now it was our turn to see Rage and then we could go home and get some much needed sleep.
I got up and went to help Riley up so we could walk down the hall to Rage’s room. When we got there and walked inside, it was to hear Rage flirting with the nurse in his room. The drugs he was on must have been something else because the man never fucking talked, let alone flirted with women. He usually just gave them a look and they ran away.
“Rage, you okay there, brother?” I chuckled when he turned to look at us and he got this d
oofy ass grin on his face.
“Riley! Come and give your little brother a hug!” he shouted. This improved Riley’s mood instantly. She was laughing so hard she was weezing. The grin that was on Rage’s face turned into a deep frown and he asked, “Is she laughing at me?” There were literal tears in his eyes. I couldn’t hold it in any longer. The laughter felt good after everything. It felt like a ray of sunshine on an otherwise gloomy day.
“Rage, you are something else. How are you feeling?” Riley asked after we got ourselves under control. She went to his side and held his hand. She wouldn’t get a serious answer from him right this second but I wasn’t going to tell her what to do.
After we talked to him for a little bit it was time to go home and with a promise to come get him tomorrow, we were on our way back to the clubhouse. Finally we pulled up and I couldn’t wait to get into bed. But there was something I needed to know first. Riley was in the bathroom at the moment and I heard her groaning. She was probably changing the bandaging on her leg.
“Baby, wanna let me in so I can help you with that?” I knocked on the door when she didn’t answer my question. I wasn’t going to force her but I wasn’t going to let her go through this alone either. I stood there and waited for her to be done or let me help her. Whatever she wanted, I was going to be there for her. When the door opened she was in a long sleeve shirt with some sweatpants. The marks around her throat made me want to bring JP back to life and kill him all over again. It was obvious in the way she wouldn’t look me in the eye that something was wrong. She wandered to the bed and laid on her side, facing away from me. That was when I saw the gauze sticking out from the bottom of her shirt.
“Riley, what did he do to you?” I whispered. I traced my fingers along her upper back, right underneath her hairline and down her arm. Linking my fingers with hers I kissed her over her shirt, all along her spine. I wanted her to know that no matter what nothing would scare me away.
“He ruined me. You might as well look and get it over with since you aren’t ever going to look at me the same. Hell, that is if you will even want me anymore.”
“Don’t you talk like that, Riley. There will never be another woman for me. I love you, With all my god damned heart. You are the only one for me. I promise you no matter what is on your back, I will be here for you. You are the love of my life, you beautiful, stubborn woman.” I kissed her on her cheek until she rolled her face to mine and I was able to kiss those soft, pillowy lips of hers.
“I don’t want to push you, Riley, but the sooner I know, the sooner you can get through all of this.” That was the final straw. She sat up in bed and pulled her shirt off. I was momentarily distracted by her sexy body but then she stood up and turned around. The gauze was covering almost all of her back, save for the upper part by her shoulder blades. I went to pull the top part of the medical tape and she winced. Whether in agony or fear of what I was about to see, I couldn’t be sure, so I asked if she was okay. When she nodded, I kept going. As I got the whole thing off, I couldn’t believe my eyes. There, carved into her skin, was JP. J was on the left side of her spine and P was on the right. The letters were jagged and bloody with stitches keeping it together.
My skin felt too tight to be on my body. It felt like that itch you couldn’t reach, but it was everywhere not only one spot. This had to be some kind of sick joke. There was no way I was seeing it, but there it was, literally in Riley’s flesh. I took a deep breath in through my nose and out through my mouth. Then the words tumbled out of my mouth.
“We will fix this. You are not ruined whatsoever. This happened to you, yes, but we are going to get you through it. Yes, I said we, meaning Reese and I. She is probably berating you for talking like that anyways.” I put the bandage back on, along with her shirt and I held her while she cried for what felt like all night. When she finally fell asleep, I made sure she was comfortable in bed and went out to the bar for a stiff drink but ended up getting the whole bottle instead.
Riley
As soon as I woke up I knew something was wrong. The bed next to me was cold. The sun wasn’t up yet but it was definitely early morning. Maybe three or four in the morning. And if the bed was cold, it meant Axel had been away for some time now which had me worried. I got up and looked around the room to see if there was a note he left for me, explaining his absence but there was nothing. Figuring the next best thing would be to go looking for him out in the clubhouse, that's what I did. Maybe there was an emergency or something, so I got dressed as best I could and went out in search of him.
What I found was not something I thought would ever happen. The clubhouse was silent except for the light snores coming from the man slumped over the bar with a bottle of whiskey in his hand. There was a little light on above the bar that made it look like a halo hovering over Axel’s head. I walked over on quiet footsteps, as quiet as an injured woman could be anyways, and pushed his hair out of his face. It had grown since I had first met him and it was starting to get shaggy, but it looked good on him. Although that was a topic for later because my leg was aching and I wanted my man in bed holding me.
“Baby, come on come to bed,” I told him. I didn’t want to startle him but I didn’t think whispering was going to do the trick. I tried to shake his shoulder a little bit but that didn’t work either. Huffing under my breath, I figured I would just let him stay there all night. There was a perfectly good couch to sleep on against the wall, across from the bar. Going back to the room and grabbing an extra sheet to lay on the couch, plus the blanket and pillows made my leg throb. There was no way in hell I was using the crutches though. Once I was done making my temporary bed, I went over and kissed Axel on the cheek. With a whispered goodnight my head hit the pillow and it was into dreamland from there.
No, I wasn’t here again. I couldn’t be. I remember getting shot but there was no throbbing ache in my leg anymore. Which meant this was a nightmare come true. I was strapped to a table without a shirt on again, only this time I was face up. JP was in the corner with his head bent over, looking at his table of tools. I was afraid to scream because I knew he was dead, but this nightmare took on a whole new level of terrifying. When he turned around, the scream came out because he had a gunshot wound right to the center of his forehead.
“Shhhh, it’s okay, Riley. This will only hurt a little bit,” he told me with his creepy fucking cackle.
“Riley!” I woke up to a yelling Axel in my face. Right away I saw the fear and worry in his eyes, the two emotions warring in those pretty brown eyes that I knew and loved so much. I wouldn’t let JP break me from the grave. I was stronger than that. Realizing I was okay, Axel picked me up bridal style and brought me into the shower. I didn’t want to leave the couch a mess, but apparently I didn’t get a choice in that. Axel mumbled out a lame apology to Kelly, the bartender, nodded her head and waved us down the hallway. I would have to remind myself to thank her later.
Getting into the bathroom in Axel’s room, I wanted to undress and get these sticky clothes off of me immediately. It felt like I had sweat gallons from my nightmare. Axel had other plans though. He turned the water on scalding hot and began undressing me, one stitch of clothing at a time. It was sweet but I knew exactly what he was doing; I could see it behind his eyes. He wanted to make sure I knew that I was safe, and he had to assure himself as well that I was actually here, safe, and not in the house he grew up in, kidnapped by his psychopath brother. I let him take care of me since I realized this is what he needed, and maybe some part of me needed it too.
I knew him and his brother were nothing alike. I knew it like I knew the grass was green and the sky blue. But when Axel looked at me the way he did, with such love and adoration in his eyes, it made everything disappear until it was just us two. I wanted to make sure he knew exactly how I felt about him. While he was on his knees, pulling my sweatpants and panties down, I pushed my fingers through his hair and tugged a little to let him know I wanted his attention.
“I don’t
think I got to thank you for saving my life. I can’t even begin to understand what it had to be like for you to, well, ya know... I am really messing this whole speech up. I don’t know I would have lasted much longer in that place with him. It was fucking horrible what he did. But I know with you by my side, everything will be okay. Axel, I love you. So fucking much. I am so in love with you and I know you might not need to hear it, but I want to make sure you know how thankful I am for you.” He just sat there on his knees in front of my naked body with his head bent forward, resting on my belly.
When his body started shaking, I knew he needed this. He needed to purge himself of all these emotions he tried to drown in the bottom of a bottle last night. He held onto my hips like they were his lifeline to surviving. I couldn’t imagine for a second what he was going through. I was sure there was a piece inside of him that cared, and maybe even loved, his brother. Taking JP’s life couldn’t have been an easy task for him to do. All I knew from this point, was that there was no going back for either of us. We were both here, alive, and I would never take that for granted again.
Axel started calming down a couple minutes later and I wanted to help take his mind off of it for a little bit. “Come on, baby. Let’s get in the shower and wash everything away.” I wasn’t supposed to get any of my wounds wet so I would only be washing the areas I could and my hair would have to wait. Getting Axel all washed up sounded like a good idea, but now that he was taking his clothes off there was a distinct throbbing in between my legs that I wanted to ignore. This shower was going to be about him.
I washed what I could of my body while Axel did his hair and face. The bandage on my leg had to go since it wasn’t sticking anymore anyways. It was kind of like a sponge bath for my upper half, and my core that was now sopping wet from the vision in front of me.
Fuck. Yeah, this situation warranted that fuck. Axel naked in the shower, all rippling muscles and tattoos with the water running down his beautiful body was a sight to behold. Fuck. Was it bad that I wanted to jump him in the shower or for him to push me up against the wall and have wild, crazy monkey sex? Nope. I got a hold of myself and asked for the body wash so I could at least get my hands on him. He handed it over without realizing my inner dilemma. I took my time washing him since this shower was supposed to be about him, but now that he was clean and his scent of cinnamon and vanilla was surrounding me, I found myself drenched down below.
