by Keya Jay
Chapter two: Sidney Fields
“Hey Sidney what about this?”
“You’re a bridesmaid Caitlin not a widow, never wear black to a wedding. How about this?” Sidney said holding up a peach strapless dress with a sweetheart silver embroidery.
“But I’m pale I want something dark,” she wined.
“You’re not the only bridesmaid,” Sidney said as she put the dress back. “Why do you care anyway I thought you didn’t like your sister?” she said as she continued to roam the rack.
“I don’t but I love any occasion that gives me the chance to dress up like a princess and as my best friend you have to want the same thing.”
“Whatever, what about this it’s the same dress but it’s royal blue,” Sidney said holding it up so she’d be able to see.
“Fine let’s try it on,” she said snatching it out of her hand. Sidney grabbed a size 4 and went back toward the dressing room to change.
“Oh this dress is beautiful,” Sidney heard Caitlin say from her dressing room.
Once Sidney had the dress on she walked out and toward the floor length mirror. The dress was beautiful but it was a bit long you wouldn’t be able to see the shoes.
“Aww you look beautiful Sid,” Caitlin said as she stood beside her in the mirror.
“Thanks but what about the shoes?”
“We’ll find some don’t worry.”
“My problem’s not finding them my problems not being able to see them,” Sidney said lifting the dress by the hem.
“So you find the perfect dress that I’m 100% happy with but you’re upset about not being able to see the shoes! The shoes aren’t important! And don’t even think about suggesting you try on the other blue dress over there because I won’t allow it, I want all of the bridesmaids to look the same.”
“There’s another one?” Sidney asked a bit overly excited as she looked into the direction that Caitlin had indicated.
“Yes but it is not for you,” Caitlin said hooking her arm around hers and steering her in the direction of that dressing room she had exited.
“Now go in there and change back then we’ll go searching for matching shoes.”
“Fine,” Sidney huffed as she went back into the dressing room.
Hmmm that’s strange my clothes aren’t here –maybe I was in the other dressing room, she thought to herself as she left to go into the other one. What the –my clothes weren’t there either. Sidney walked out of the dressing room.
“What? Did you change your mind and decide that you like the dress anyway, so much so that you refuse to take it off?”
“No I would like more than anything to take the stupid dress off, the problem is I can’t seem to find my clothes.”
“Did you check the dressing rooms?”
“No, because why would I do something like that?” Sidney asked sarcastically. “Of course I checked the dressing rooms!”
“Ok so where could they be?”
“Ask another stupid question please; give me a reason to smack some sense into you. If I knew where they were do you think I’d still be wearing this dress?”
“Sheesh, well go and ask the boss lady over there.”
I didn’t want to fuckin come here anyways, I just wanted to stay home and cry in my pillow, but no Caitlin couldn’t just let me grieve. She had to be a stupid friend and get me out of the house and for what –Bridesmaids dresses? Like I wanted to think about some perfect little couple about to tie the knot and forever become bound to one another, why couldn’t she just let me nurse my broken heart?! Sidney huffed and dragged her feet across the floor toward the supervisor.
“How may I help you?” she said in that annoyingly polite voice.
“Did you see anyone go into one of those there dressing rooms?”
“Every day,” she said with that never faltering smile. Stupid question of course she saw someone go into the dressing rooms, everyone goes into the dressing rooms.
“Well did you see someone take something out of the dressing rooms?”
“As a matter of fact I did,” she said dropping the smile and scrounging her brows.
“Did they take a pair of clothes?”
“Yes,” she said sitting a bit taller obviously realizing that this was a serious problem. “I asked him where he was going with them and he said he couldn’t seem to find his daughter but that she had left her clothes behind, I didn’t question him because that sort of thing happens all of the time –-”
“Someone leaving your store with one of your dresses and leaving their clothes behind, you’re telling me that sort of stuff happens all of the time?”
“Well no but they do leave an article of clothing behind but I guess you’re right it was a bit weird.”
“Well did the man say anything else did he say where he was going?”
“Oh yes, he said if I saw his daughter to tell her to meet him in their favorite place do you know where that is?” Seeing as though Sidney wasn’t the mystery man’s daughter of course she didn’t know where that was. “Oh and before I forget he also said that he asked you to do one simple thing and you couldn’t, don’t be mad at him when it was you who failed. I don’t know if that made any sense to you or means anything at all but that’s all he said.”
“This is ridiculous,” Sidney said threw teeth so clenched they over lapped each other. Sidney knew exactly who her supposed “father” was. She couldn’t believe he’d do this to her. Now what was she supposed to do? She couldn’t let the lady know she knew the crazy man.
“I have no clue who that man is, my father’s dead,” Sidney told the supervisor.
“I am so sorry ma’am if I would have known I wouldn’t have let him leave the store with your clothes.”
“So now what? I don’t exactly have the money to pay for this dress and I don’t have any other clothing.”
“Maybe I can help, follow me.”
Sidney followed the woman toward the back of the store and through a door. It was freezing in there and there were half open boxes littered everywhere. The woman stopped and began going through one of the boxes. When she was done she held a nice simple white sundress.
“This is the best I can do all of the rest of the dresses aren’t really dresses you can just walk around in,” she said holding it out toward her.
“I appreciate it,” Sidney said taking the dress from the woman’s out stretched hand.
“If you’d meet me at the front of the store I have a cute pair of silver gladiator sandals that would go perfect with that dress.”
“I’m fine really I still have my shoes.” Sidney said showing her the ankle boot’s that were hidden underneath the ridiculously long blue gown.
“I let some stranger come into my store and steal your clothes getting you the shoes to match is the least I can do.”
Sidney knew she was only worried that she’d say something bad about the store because of this little incident but the woman had nothing to worry about, besides this is Sidney’s best friends favorite store, this is where they got their eight grade graduation dress, and their prom dresses if this store closed it would kill Caitlin.
Sidney followed the lady toward the front of the store and she handed her the pair of sandals.
“You don’t need anything else do you? Matching earing? A necklace?”
“No really I’m fine thank you.” She smiled before walking away.
This break up utterly destroyed her, she was so not fine. If she were herself right about now she would have taken everything the woman had offered and more, Sidney would have made sure to tell the woman that she would be telling everyone she knew (and she knew a lot of people who knew a lot of people) what happened unless the woman gave her the bridesmaid dress for free, but right about now she didn’t have the energy.
“Hey, Oh cute dress and I’m loving the sandals. Did you find your clothes?” Caitlin said as she stood beside Sidney at the stores exit.
“Caitlin if I found my clothes do you think I’d be wearing this right now?” Dumb question, after dumb question, after dumb question, how in the hell did she deal with it all?
“Well I have to show all of the other bridesmaids the dress,” she said wiggling the bag with the dress inside, “and then I have to leave for New York tonight in order to make it to my sister’s fitting tomorrow, You are coming to the wedding rehearsal correct?”
“Yes,” she needed to get as far away from this town as possible.
“Right so I’ll see you in two days, love you bunches,” Caitlin said with a dramatic wave before heading down the street.
Our place Sidney repeated the words the woman had said to her as she went in the opposite direction as Caitlin. Why does he want to meet with me? Hasn’t he said enough?
When Sidney stood in front of the giant tree house that she, him and a couple of their friends used to play in when they were little she stopped. She wasn’t ready to face him, not yet, it was too soon.
“Are you just gonna stare at the tree or go up, he’s not coming to you if that’s what you think.”
Sidney didn’t have to turn around to know who stood behind her. Nathaniel used to be her best friend but the more time she spent with Ryder the less time he spent with her.
“So what? You and Ryder are friends now, I thought you hated him?” Sidney said not bothering to turn around or climb the tree.
“People change you should know that Sidney, you changed the most.”
“I’m not telling you who you can and cannot hang out with Nate it was just a question no need to get all defensive.”
“Are you going up or not?”
“Nope I can’t I’m in a dress,” she said shyly.
“I remember when little 8 year old Sidney with her two little pony tails used to hate dresses, as a matter of fact 8,9,10,11,12,13,and14 year old Sidney hated them too. She used to rip them and hide them anything she could think of just so she wouldn’t have to put one on.”
“I’m 19 Nate you didn’t expect me to stay 8 forever did you? Besides your friend snuck into my dressing room and stole my clothes which left me without a choice.”
“Oh right you mean those pranks we use to pull on other people? Did you forget how they went? Have you changed that much?”
“We did those pranks to other people not each other; we never did them on our friends!” Sidney snapped.
“Say’s a lot about what we think of you now doesn’t it?” Sidney wanted to smack that satisfied grin right off of his face. “You wonder why we didn’t do it to Caitlin because we could have.”
“No I don’t wonder I don’t even care,” she said turning around to walk away.
Sidney wasn’t gonna just stand there if Ryder didn’t bother coming down he knew she was there.
“But you do care Sidney,” Nate said running to catch up to her. “Maybe if you were the old Sidney I’d believe you when you say you don’t care because the old Sidney wouldn’t be having this conversation with me, I wouldn’t have to remind the old Sidney of what she once was. This Sidney here though, this Sidney thinks she’s better than all of us. Money comes rollin in and the neither new nor old Sidney would have been able to resist it, but the old Sidney wouldn’t have dumped her friends because of it because she was once like us, remember? But now she has a few bills to her name and now she’s too good for us, can’t be seen around the likes of us. You wonder why Ryder dumped you. Well there’s your reason he sees exactly what the rest of us see. He liked the old Sidney, he thought he was dating the old Sidney and then you come along to replace her, you can’t have it all. The best of both worlds doesn’t exist.”
“Are you going to follow me all the way to my house?” Sidney said not bothering to look behind her at him as she asked the question.
“No I wouldn’t want to embarrass you.”
“Thank God, I appreciate it,” she said as she crossed the street and turned on her block. Sidney didn’t have to turn around to know that he was still following her; she could feel him like a constant bee buzzing in her ear. She knew her last comment had him wandering if she actually meant it. She didn’t by the way she’s not that shallow she didn’t care if her mom and her new boyfriend didn’t accept the kind of people she surrounded herself with, yes she might give in a time or two and do what they say which involves dressing a certain way but she hasn’t changed. She was the same old her.
Sidney walked on to her front porch and turned to face Nate. “Do you plan on coming in or would you rather just stand on my porch?”
“Will you invite me in?”
“Do you want to come in?” she asked rolling her eyes slightly; he always had to make things difficult.
“I would love to.”
Sidney turned around and tried to open the door but it was locked, which meant Hank and her mother went out.
“You really shouldn’t hide your key under a plant tree have you learned nothing from seeing so many others do the exact same thing?” he said as she retrieved her key and unlocked the door.
“Well when you think of a better hiding place let me know,” she said as she opened the door wide for him to come in.
“You could always hide it in your pocket.”
“I’ll lose it, I’ll take it out one time and I’ll never see it again cause I’ll forget to put it back in my pocket.”
“Nice to see some things don’t change, I remember you getting locked out of your house and you had to stay in the principal’s office until she called your mother, than I came by and drove you to my house and your mother laid an egg looking for you —she couldn’t find you anywhere. I still think that principles afraid of your mother, whatever she said or did had the principle not wanting to look in your direction, which was a good thing because you took the rap for almost everything we did that year and never got in trouble.” She laughed at the memory. “I miss that laugh,” he said causing her laugh to immediately stop.
“I haven’t changed,” she said soberly.
“You have Si –-”
“No I haven’t” she said cutting him off. “My family, life style, and surroundings may have changed but I haven’t. I still hate dresses no matter how many I wear I’ll always hate them, and I hate family dinners every Saturday because we’re not a family and I hate the fact that my friends don’t want to be friends anymore because of my mother’s boyfriend’s money. I haven’t changed yall just look at me differently.” There was extremely tense silence after that.
“How come we don’t meet up anymore?” he asked finally breaking the silence.
“Besides the fact that you dumbed me the moment I started dating Ryder?”
“I didn’t dump you.”
“Oh yea so what would you call it? Me and Ryder started dating and you started distancing yourself from me more and more until the point where I rarely ever see you anymore.”
“I didn’t want to be a third wheel.”
“We’ve been a third wheel our whole lives!” she argued. A slow smile started to form and it only made her angrier. “Why are you smiling, I didn’t say anything remotely funny!?”
“Your right you didn’t. Do you remember when that boy next door the really annoying one made you pee your pants?”
“What does this have to do with anything?” she asked. Of course she remembered that was one of the most embarrassing moments of her life.
“So that’s a yes you do remember well do you remember what we did to that boy?”
“Yea I remember you un-screwed the back wheel on his tricycle and when he went to ride it it fell apart in the middle of the street. Then you let Mr. Wallace’s mean pit bull loose and it chased the boy for nearly 5 blocks and we watched and rode alongside them silently in our tricycle the whole time,” she said smiling at the memory, they had loads of fun back then. “I can see why you’d remember such a thing like that but that’s not the point.”
“Isn
’t it? Well think about it we were that tricycle once upon a time, sooner or later it would have ended the same way, there’s no way you can throw a relationship in the mix of what we had.”
“And what did we have?”
“We had a strong friendship and nothing could ever break that… but a relationship.”
Sidney knew Ryder, there’s no such thing as staying friends with the women he dumps, he says there too clingy, that they always try to get him back whether it’s by making him jealous or by doing something stupider.
“I don’t want him back I’m not like all of those other females I understand that what we had is over,” and she meant every word.
“Good, but there’s no way he’d believe that,”
“Because he’s too self-absorbed,” they said simultaneously.
“Yea I guess you’re right,” she said letting her front door close, seeing her mom’s boyfriends’ car role up toward the house.
“But that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends,” she said hopefully. Sidney missed acting up with him; they used to get into so much trouble together; she missed that.
“Yea I guess you’re right,” he said throwing her last statement back at her.
“Hey Hank the Tank’s home, and I brought your mother,” Hank announced.
“Why do you call yourself that, and shouldn’t it be the other way around? This isn’t your house,” Sidney said stepping aside so he wouldn’t touch her.
“Still think boy’s got the cooties huh?” Nate whispered.
“I wouldn’t put it past him,” she said never letting her eyes leave Hanks.
“Hey honey,” her mom said stepping in-between her and Hank making it physically impossible for her to glare at him.
“Mom” she said barely giving her any recognition.
“And you are?”
“Mom you remember Nathaniel,” Sidney said rolling her eyes, she couldn’t have possibly forgotten about him she use to tell Sidney daily how much she never trusted him.
“Right,” she said nodding her head slowly. “The last time I saw you you were like what 13?”
“Just about,” Nate said as if her playing stupid didn’t bother him at all. “And the last time I saw you, you were like –-” Sidney elbowed Nate in the side hard making him double over in pain before he could finish his sentence, knowing him it wouldn’t have been anything nice. The feeling between them was mutual.
“I was just gonna say 20” he said resting his hands on his thighs as she looked down at him before walking into the house.
“Finish with him and then I want you to come in here and set the table for dinner,” her mom answered before she disappeared inside.
“Times 100,” he finished once she was out of ear shot. “Your elbows are just as pointy as I remembered,” he said trying to stand to his full height.
“Well I’ve tried to put them in your side enough times that eventually when you thought about saying something stupid you’d think twice.”
“She started it,” and Sidney couldn’t agree more she did but she’s still her mother.
“I should go, you know what happened the last time we were out here alone.” Sidney smiled she remembered exactly what happened her mom came out with her dice timer that she uses in the kitchen to tell her when something’s done, she sat it on the porch and set it for 5 minutes and when the timer went off she cut off the porch lights and screamed for Sidney to come in the house and for Nate to go home. Nate came in the house with Sidney and Sidney’s mothers’ face was priceless.
“I think you might have cut off the porch lights, we couldn’t see so we decided to finish our conversation in here,” he explained and Sidney busted out laughing on the spot she couldn’t hold it in.
“Yea I remember,” she said finally after the memory died away.
“Alright I’ll see you around kiddo,” Sidney nodded in acknowledgement.
“You know we’re going to have quite the stories to tell our children,” Sidney yelled after him
. “Who’s having children?!” Sidney’s mom said flying out the door. Sidney could hear Nate’s loud laughter.
“For your sake Sid I hope your children are nothing like us,” he said driving the screw driver deeper into her mother’s already ram rod straight posture.
“No one’s having children mom, relax” Sidney said rolling her eyes but not being able to help the smile that lingered on her lips.
“Come on Kid time to set the table,” Hank said.
Sidney couldn’t get rid of a smile faster than Hank could, her smile immediately dropped and she walked right past Hank and straight into the kitchen.
“That a girl,” he said the moment she started pulling out utensils, Sidney knew he was trynna get a reaction out of her but she wouldn’t budge; he wasn’t worth it.
