by Skye Horn
“So, Declan is cute?” Haven said from the bed. Her lips pulled up in an awkward grin, but Thea couldn’t return the smile or even laugh at the joke. All she could do was think of how Kieran had sent her off into the sunset with Declan.
“Someone, please tell me what happened,” Ethel begged, looking at Thea and then Haven. “Also, how did you get involved in this?”
At this, Thea managed a smile and said, “I think Haven was flirting with me in the village.”
Haven rolled her eyes, laughing.
“That was before I knew about all your baggage.” Her tone was just as light as they grinned at each other. Haven clearly didn’t actually have a thing for her, but Thea still enjoyed the shared moment. Somehow, this girl had gotten under Thea’s skin without even having to try, and now Thea wasn’t sure she ever wanted her to leave. Having Haven around stabilized Thea in a way that no one else seemed to be able to. Thea had never had a female friend like that before, and she kind of liked it.
“Anywayyy,” Haven said, extending the word. “I’d kind of like to know what happened too.”
With that, Thea launched into a retelling of her and Kieran’s conversation. She left out the part where she’d asked Kieran if he regretted sleeping with her for Ethel’s sake, but told them everything else without shedding a single tear. It actually helped to say it out loud.
When she’d caught them up on the entire conversation, Ethel let out a frustrated sigh and said, “What did he expect? To come home and be in your guard while you’re still in love with him?”
“I don’t know, but he’s obviously no longer in love with me,” Thea replied in short.
Haven had sprawled onto her stomach and was holding her head up with one of her palms while her wings outstretched like a blanket over the top of her.
“I’m not sure that’s true,” she said, watching as Ethel began combing through Thea’s hair, satisfied that she’d removed the remaining makeup. “He’s just like every other man, stubborn to the bone about being right.”
This made Thea laugh, even if she didn’t quite agree with the statement.
“He likes to be right, but I know a lot of women who are that way too,” she said, thinking of Iris. It was clear where Kieran had gotten his stubbornness from. “I just need to move on.”
Her words didn’t feel real. They tasted sour on her tongue and only earned her sympathetic glances from Ethel and Haven.
“Well, like I said, Declan is cute,” Haven said, folding her arms on the bed and resting her chin on them with a shrug.
“Come on, you have a suitor to impress and a deal to keep,” Ethel said, holding out the dress Thea had promised to wear. Thea groaned in protest, but there was no way she was getting out of this.
A deal was a deal, even if it meant and evening of torture.
She stripped out of her comfortable boots and leather pants to her underwear, and pulled on the silky slip that would go beneath the dress. It was supposed to shield her skin from the itchy lace, but in Thea’s experience, it had never actually done that.
Ethel held open the strapless gown for Thea to step into and wiggled it upward until it sat across her chest, while Haven tried to hide her laughter.
“Why is it that women are expected to wear such torture devices?” Haven asked, eyeing the corset that Ethel laced up Thea’s back.
“I’ve been asking that question since I got here,” Thea grumbled and heard Ethel laugh.
It only took a minute or two before Thea was dressed and looking at her strange reflection in the mirror. She’d never quite got used to seeing herself in these extravagant gowns, but she could admit that this one screamed “Princess” a lot louder than any of the other ones she’d worn.
And yet, she liked the way it hugged her body. It was an A-line cut which flowed out around her in layers of glittering silver chiffon. The skirt of the dress made her appear petite but powerful as it seemed to flow under her command. The bodice was decorated with beads that swirled and sparkled beneath the candlelight as she spun around to look at what she could see of the back beneath her wings.
“It suits you, though.” Haven smiled, and Ethel nodded her agreement, looking excited to see Thea wearing the silver dress.
“I suppose it’s not so bad,” Thea hesitated to say. She felt exposed without the usual sleeves of her winter gowns. Her pale skin seemed far more obvious when unprotected like this, leaving the small freckles that dotted it out in the open for anyone to see.
“Here.” Ethel held up a strand of black pearls that made Thea’s eyes widen. “These were your mother’s. I found them in Ivandor, but they needed the perfect dress—this is it.”
Ethel blushed and walked in front of Thea to hook the pearls around her neck without her wings getting in the way. The cool strand fell perfectly across her chest, accenting the sweetheart neckline of the dress and the sharpness of her collarbones.
“They’re beautiful,” Thea said, touching her fingertips to the pearls. She’d known that some of her mother’s things were still in the castle, but she hadn’t looked for any of them. The fact that Ethel had found these for her meant more than she knew how to express.
“Don’t forget your shoes,” Ethel said, reaching inside the wardrobe to pull out a pair of black high-heeled shoes. They weren’t too high, but it would be the first time Thea had worn heels since her high-school prom. Nerves bubbled up in the pit of her stomach at the mere thought. “You will be fine.”
Thea held onto Ethel for balance as she slipped into the shoes, rising two inches.
“Okay. Do I look presentable?” she asked Haven, knowing Ethel would say she did no matter what.
“You’re missing two things,” Haven said, jumping up off the bed and heading for the vanity. First, she pulled out the black charcoal substance and began lining Thea’s eyes with it in the same way she’d done it herself earlier that day. “I like this on you.”
“What’s the second thing?” Thea asked, but Haven was already reaching for a dagger from Thea’s weapons baldric, which she cringed to see was just lying on the floor.
“This.” Haven tucked the dagger into Thea’s corset. “Can’t be too careful.”
“Oh!” Ethel pulled out a dark red cream and smudged it across Thea’s lips, giving them a scarlet tint, and then wiped the excess off her fingers on Thea’s cheeks, as if she ever needed more color there.
When Thea looked in the mirror, there was no sign of the girl who’d broken down in the cobblestoned streets of Gimmerwich. Instead, she stared at the reflection of a tall, beautiful princess—royalty. She grabbed the sparkling powder she’d been too scared to use earlier in the day and dabbed it across her eyelids, bringing her eyes to an additional level and then nodded her head as she said, “I think I’m ready.”
A shadow of guilt lurked beneath the surface as she stared at her reflection in the mirror, wondering what her life had come to that she would dress to impress not only the Queen of Gimmerwich but also her nephew, when she was so pathetically in love with someone else. She felt like a child who’d stepped into an adult’s body and didn’t understand how to handle it, but the reflection in the mirror wasn’t a child’s.
Ethel had pulled her hair half-up and let her natural waves fall down her back. She’d also tucked a few of her favorite decorative flowers into her hair and pulled a couple of strands free to frame her face. Everything about the reflection in the mirror screamed that Thea was a queen, or could be one.
“You’re going to knock him off his feet,” Ethel said with a smile that didn’t quite touch her eyes.
“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Thea murmured back as Haven and Ethel both stood at her sides. “Can we meet up after dinner?”
“I’m supposed to meet Mica,” Ethel said, looking anywhere but at Thea, who lifted an eyebrow in response. “Just to make sure he doesn’t kill Kieran. You know…”
Thea didn’t quite believe that was the only reason, but she also wanted to ask Ethel to do som
ething that would mean she couldn’t see her anyway.
“Would you check on Kieran?” she asked.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Haven said, shaking her head at Thea.
“I said some things I regret,” Thea defended. “I just need to know he’s okay. Plus, I think Ethel should see him anyway.”
Ethel considered Thea’s words as she studied her expression, but there was nothing to hide. Thea had no ulterior motive; she just wanted them to be okay, even if she wasn’t.
“Only if I’m allowed to tell him what a jerk he has been to all of us,” Ethel agreed.
“Permission granted.” Thea laughed a little and then glanced at Haven’s disapproving look. “What about you? Do you have plans tonight?”
“I can rearrange them for you,” she responded, her lips pulling into a tight smile that said she still didn’t approve of Thea checking on Kieran. “Meet me in the courtyard when you’re done, but don’t wear that.”
Thea grinned at her, twirling around, and exclaimed, “I thought you said it suited me.”
“You’re going to be late, Princess,” Haven laughed, rolling her eyes. Thea had heard that tone from Kieran many times before, but this time it didn’t hurt. Haven had grown on her, even with her sarcasm and disapproval. Thea had spent months keeping people out, and Haven had slipped through her walls uninvited.
But Thea liked it. She liked it a lot.
“Oh, and don’t forget to compliment him on his dashing looks,” Haven called out as Thea headed out of the room, shaking with a long-forgotten feeling of mirth.
Chapter 14
His fight with Thea felt a million miles away from the skies above Gimmerwich, but Kieran knew that as soon as his feet touched the ground again reality would settle back in. It didn’t matter if he tried to convince himself he was right, or if he made excuses for his terrible behavior, because everything that had happened since the moment he’d brought Thea back to Faerie had been his fault.
She thought he regretted being with her, but he didn’t—he couldn’t. All he could regret was the pain that being with her had caused them both. They had thought Ainé revealing that they were soulmates would make everything better, but it had only made reality harder to swallow. A soul bond was nothing but a curse when you couldn’t be with the person you loved the most in the world. It was as if someone had ripped his heart from his chest but left the nerves attached so he could continue to feel the pain. Clawing his own heart out sounded more realistic than moving on.
Kieran burst through another barrier of clouds into an array of sunlight that warmed his dampened skin. Droplets of water trickled off the feathers of his outstretched wings as he spun through the open air, letting the burning anger within him explode into gusts of wind that shattered the clouds and carried him upward. There was no reason to control his magic in the open skies. He could send tornados through the puffs of white cotton that decorated the pale blue sky and no one would notice or care. He was free to act and feel whatever array of emotions he wanted to here for as long as his wings would carry him.
At least until the Goddess of Death invaded his headspace.
You’ve left the doors to your mind wide-open, Son of Darkness, Morrigan’s familiar voice cooed, and a tendril of dark magic slipped over his dampened skin, leaving a trail of ice in its wake. And what an interesting mind you have.
Kieran struggled against the magic, his chest tightening as he tried to slam his walls of protection back into place, but it was useless. Morrigan had already slipped past unnoticed.
Get out, he growled, internalizing the command with as much magic as possible. If the intrusion had been a normal Fae’s, the magic would have held, but it was no more than a tickle against Morrigan’s magic. He heard her laughing at the poor attempt as he pivoted in the air, heading back toward the village.
I’m not here to harm you, just as I had no intention of harming your mate.
The ache of his ripped-away heart returned as Morrigan walked through his deepest thoughts, replaying the most recent memory of Thea retreating from him on a painful loop. His temples throbbed at the invasion, but there was nothing he could do to expel the Goddess from his mind, not if he intended to stay airborne.
What do you want? Even his inner voice was choking—screaming for the pain to end.
To enlighten you, Morrigan whispered, loosening the dark magic that wrapped around his wrists. If she could do this to him from a distance, he didn’t know if they’d ever stand a chance against her in person. She’d obviously grown stronger since their encounter in Ivandor. But first, let me ask you a question.
Kieran wanted to yell at her to get out again, but it would do him no good. If he wanted her to leave, he would have to engage in whatever conversation she wanted to have. So, he remained silent, which she took as permission to continue speaking.
Why would my sister chain you to a soul you cannot have?
The question surprised Kieran enough that he didn’t have an answer. What kind of question was that, anyway? Why would Ainé chain him to Thea? He wasn’t chained. He loved her.
No one questions your love, but my question remains. Why give you something you could not have? If you ask me, it seems more like a punishment.
Why would Ainé want to punish me? Kieran asked, wanting to roll his eyes at how stupid this conversation was becoming. She told Thea she has no control over the laws of our lands.
The Goddess laughed, and the sound echoed through his head like thunder.
And you were naïve enough to believe her? Can you not think of any way she might have helped your relationship prosper? She is the Goddess your people worship, is she not?
Kieran’s head felt like it was spinning. He wondered how much more of this mental conversation he could take before he fell from the sky, so he tried to turn the conversation around, seeking answers to questions he’d been contemplating since their last encounter.
Why do you call me Son of Darkness? he asked, desperate for that answer most. He wished he could see Morrigan’s face, because without seeing her, he didn’t know if she was surprised by his question or even intended to answer it. However, her voice came only a moment later.
Because darkness flows through your veins.
Vague and unhelpful, Kieran thought.
You did not think Ainé was the only one with Fae descendants, did you? Your kind must have realized that the Fae were born from more than one Goddess.
Kieran’s flight faltered, and he felt himself dropping as he fought for control of his limbs. The magic was weighing on him, and he knew he didn’t have much time left before it knocked him out.
What are you saying? That you are the mother of the Fae?
Again the Goddess laughed, but this time she didn’t answer his question.
Think about everything you’ve been told and ask yourself what truth might unfold beneath the lies. If you discover that truth, you may also find your deepest desire satisfied, for only with darkness can there be light, and only with light can there be shadows for darkness to dwell within.
Kieran’s breath quickened as his feet touched the ground. He’d landed near enough to the tavern and hoped to make the rest of his journey on foot, but he no longer had the energy to answer Morrigan’s riddles. Instead, he just repeated them in his head until she spoke again.
Goodbye for now, Kieran, but we will speak again soon.
And then he was alone with his thoughts once more.
When Thea reached the dining hall, she collected herself and her emotions behind the wall she’d practiced building for months. She knew that Queen Ismara and Declan were just beyond the closed doors, waiting for her arrival, but staying in control for the duration of this dinner needed to be priority number one. Thea’s magic remained unstable, but she settled her spiraling emotions with the thought of food in her grumbling stomach. She hadn’t eaten all day, and after her encounter with Kieran, she actually felt sick. Food would help that, or at least, she hoped it would
.
“Okay, here we go,” Thea said aloud, touching her mother’s pearls for comfort before opening the large wooden doors.
The dining hall was simple compared to the throne room Thea had been in earlier. A few paintings hung on the walls, and a wooden table stretched out in the middle of the room. Queen Ismara sat at the head of the table with Declan on her right and a young boy on her left. He looked around the age of twelve and had the same silvery eyes as the queen.
“Good evening, Princess Thea,” the queen greeted, standing as she walked into the room. Her male counterparts followed suit.
Thea curtsied in her extravagant dress, noticing the amused look on Declan’s face as he examined her cleaned-up appearance, and took the seat beside him as he offered her the chair.
“This is my son, Eric,” the queen said, motioning to the adolescent boy whose eyes were wide and shy. “And this is my nephew, Declan.”
“We’ve already met,” Declan said as they all sat back down at the table. “I introduced myself to her in the courtyard earlier.”
The white lie resonated between them, and although the queen seemed pleased by this answer, Thea watched Declan with a surprised lift of her eyebrow. She had wondered if he would tell his aunt of her emotional breakdown in the village, but he appeared to be keeping their encounter to himself.
“Excellent,” Ismara told her nephew. Her attention shifted to her son, and Thea’s eyes met Declan’s just as he smiled at her—a silent pact made between two recent friends? Acquaintances? Thea wasn’t sure, but she was grateful for it.
A variety of dishes were laid out before them on the table then, but Thea found it difficult to eat in the constraining dress. She shifted multiple times when the queen wasn’t looking, trying to make it easier to breathe, and at one point, she was sure she heard Declan stifling a laugh that made her want to jab him with a fork.
Eric watched her with significant interest and kept commenting on how beautiful she was. His face often blushed when he talked, and food spilled out of his mouth and back onto his plate multiple times, which led to a scolding from his mother.
