"What is it?" I ask, anxious to know what he wants. "What's the favor?"
"I need you to find someone. A girl. And give her a message."
"What girl? Who are you talking about?"
"Seth was dating this girl. He'd dated her for like a month and was already talking about marrying her."
"What girl? He never mentioned a girl."
"He didn't tell anyone. He wanted to wait until they'd been together longer. He kept thinking she was too good for him and wouldn't stick around. But trust me, she wasn't going anywhere. She was as hung up on him as he was on her. I've never been in love but I know what it looks like and the two of them had it. I gave him shit about it and he didn't even care. He loved her more than anything."
"So he told you but nobody else? Not even Dad?"
"He didn't tell me. I walked in on them when I got off early from work. They were making out on the couch. He didn't tell your dad but he brought her to meet him. Told him she was just a friend."
Before Seth died, I didn't know much about his life. We talked on the phone once or twice a week but not for long, and we usually talked about Dad or the business, not each other. I had no idea he was dating someone. He never mentioned it.
"Was she at the funeral?" I ask, trying to think of the girls his age who were there.
"I don't know. I'm guessing she was." He sighs. "I'm such an ass. Seth would kill me if he could."
"Why? What do you mean?"
"I never called her. I was a fucking coward. Talking to her just reminded me of Seth and I couldn't do it. And I couldn't deal with her crying and telling me how much she missed him. I couldn't do it. I was too messed up myself to deal with her so I didn't bother to follow up. I told her about the accident and that was it. I'm guessing she called your dad or someone here at the garage and they told her what happened. I know it's been over a year now but if you could just tell her I'm sorry and give her this." He hands me a small box. "I'd really appreciate it."
I open the box. Inside is a silver ring with a tiny red stone. "An engagement ring?"
"Promise ring. He wasn't ready to propose. He thought that would freak her out so he got this instead. Called it a pre-engagement ring. He was going to give it to her later that week."
"Shit," I mutter, not wanting to do this. It's going to crush this girl to get a ring from a guy she loved, a year after his death. She's probably trying to move on, or maybe she already has. This ring will just return her to the past. "I don't think this is a good idea. I think it's best if we leave her alone."'
"If you don't want to give her the ring, then fine, but would you at least talk to her? Tell her you're Seth's brother and explain what happened. Tell her I shipped off the next day and how sorry I am I didn't call her and explain everything."
"You're saying you told her Seth was in an accident and that's it?"
"Yeah, I know. I feel bad enough. You don't need to rub it in. I wasn't thinking, okay?" He takes a breath. "The night I told her about Seth I was down at the park. The one by the river. I always went there when I was upset and needed to calm down. That night, nothing was calming me down. My best friend was dead and I was shipping overseas in a few hours. Seth had left his phone at the apartment. I accidentally grabbed his instead of mine. I used it to text her."
"You used Seth's phone? So she thought it was him texting then found out it was you, telling her Seth was in an accident?"
"It was a bad idea. I get that now. I should've just gone home, got my phone and called her. I'm sure she saw the text and tried to call Seth's phone but it didn't work because I dropped the damn phone in the river. By the time I got back home, I couldn't make myself call her."
I smack his arm. "What the hell?"
"Yeah. I'm an idiot. Got it."
I sigh. "Sorry. I'm not trying to make you feel worse. I just feel bad for this girl."
"You see why I don't want to call her? I screwed up once. I can't risk doing it again."
"Fine. I'll do it. What's her name?"
"Amy. Amy Cooper."
I stare at him, not saying anything. It can't be her. It's just a coincidence. It's a common name. I'm sure there are a lot of girls with that name.
"Don't you want to write it down?" he asks. "I don't have her number but I'm sure you can find it. She goes to college here. Her cousin goes there too so maybe you could find her if you can't find Amy. The cousin had a weird name. Sun or cloud. Something like that."
"Skye," I say under my breath.
"Skye. Yeah, that's it. How'd you know?"
"Because I'm dating her," I say, staring blankly at the wall behind him.
"You're what?"
"I'm dating her. Skye is my girlfriend."
"No shit? So you know Amy."
"No." My eyes move back to his. "Amy's dead."
"She's what?"
"You might want to sit down for this."
We go up to my apartment and I tell him the story. He's shocked by the news but even more shocked that I'm dating Amy's cousin. We go through the timeline of the day Seth died and find out Marcus texted Amy right before she went over the bridge. He used Seth's phone. It was the text Skye told Amy to read. The news of Seth's accident must've upset Amy so much she lost control of the car. Since Amy didn't have Marcus' phone number and Seth's phone was in the river, Marcus assumed she went to the garage and got the news of Seth's death from Dad.
But that didn't happen because Amy was dead. And I honestly think it's because she read that text. If she really was in love with Seth, she would've seen that text and panicked. She may not have assumed he was dead but she was probably imagining him clinging to life in a hospital room. Her mind wasn't focused on the road or the bridge or where she was going.
I have to tell Skye. This might be the one thing that helps her finally believe the accident wasn't her fault.
"Keep in touch, man," Marcus says as he's leaving. "I'll be back in six months. Maybe we can get together."
"Yeah. Definitely."
"Keep me posted on your dad." He stops before getting in his car. "And tell Skye I'm really sorry. I never should've sent that text to Amy. If I'd known she was driving I would've—"
"Hey, don't start beating yourself up over this. It was an accident. And it's over." He nods, and I lean over and give him a hug. "Stay safe over there."
"I'll try." He gets in the car, his face covered in regret. He's looked that way since I told him what happened. I know he's blaming himself but I hope once he's had time to think about it, he'll realize it was just an accident and he can't go back and change the past.
When he's gone, I text Skye and tell her I'm running late. I arrive at her apartment and find her waiting at the door.
"Ready to go? I'm starving."
"Would you mind if we stayed here and ordered a pizza?" I ask. I need to tell her what Marcus said and I'd rather do that here than at a restaurant.
"You don't want to go out?"
"No," I say, going past her into the apartment. "Come sit down."
"Why?" She closes the door. "What's going on?"
"I need to tell you something." I sit on the couch. "Is Heidi home?"
"No. She's with Brad. Travis, what's going on? You're worrying me."
"Just come over here. I need to tell you something."
She comes over and sits beside me.
"You know that guy who came to see me?" I ask. "The one in the army uniform?"
"Yeah. What about him?"
"That was Marcus, Seth's roommate. They were best friends. He got shipped overseas the day after Seth died and I haven't heard from him since. Until today."
"Yeah? So why'd he want to see you?"
I don't know how to tell her this in a way that won't freak her out so I just say it. "He wanted to talk to Amy."
"Amy who?"
"Amy. Your cousin."
"What?" She rears back. "That doesn't make sense."
"I thought the same thing until Marcus told me what was going on." I
wait a beat, then say, "Amy was dating Seth. She was the guy Amy told you about. Marcus was the only person that knew they were dating, and it's only because he—"
"Walked in on them when they thought he was at work," Skye says, a blank look on her face. "She told me that night that only his roommate knew. Because he walked in on them." Her hand rises, covering her mouth. "Oh my God. Your brother was dating Amy. And now I'm dating you." She shivers.
"You okay?" I ask, rubbing her arm.
"I just got a chill thinking about that. How did we not know? Why didn't we put this together?"
"Because they kept it a secret. From everyone. Marcus said Seth introduced her to my dad but he didn't tell him they were dating."
Skye’s eyes widen. "He called me Amy!"
"What? Who?"
"Your dad! When he met me, he called me Amy. What if he thought I was her?"
"He was talking about his nurse, not your cousin. You two didn't look alike. She had blond hair."
"Yes, but our faces looked the same. If I dyed my hair blond, I'd look just like her."
I shake my head. "I don't think that's what he meant. Sounds like he only met Amy one time. I doubt he'd remember her enough to make the connection between you two."
"What if he met her more than once? Maybe she hung out at the garage with Seth and your dad and Marcus just didn't know about it."
"It's possible, but the point is, they didn't tell anyone they were dating so there's no way we could've put it together."
She shivers again. "Still gives me chills knowing Amy dated your brother and now I'm dating you."
"There's more." I take a breath. "The night of the accident, about the time you were crossing the bridge, Marcus texted Amy. Using Seth's phone."
I can see her mind working, her eyes moving around as what I told her sinks in.
"That was the text," she says.
"Yeah. At the time he thought it was a good idea to text her from Seth's phone because Amy didn't have Marcus' number and he wanted to make sure she actually read the text."
"What did it say?" Skye asks, breathing faster. "What did he tell her?"
"That Seth had been in a horrible accident."
She swallows. "Did he tell her Seth died?"
"No. He was going to call and tell her but he never did. He didn't have his phone that night. He forgot it. And he couldn't use Seth's phone because it was destroyed. Marcus was at the park when he sent the text and accidentally dropped it in the river."
"Oh my God." Her eyes go to the floor and I see her mind working again.
"What?"
"The phone. They found a phone with Amy's body. When they got her from the river, it was stuck in her shirt. They thought it was hers but it wasn't. It belonged to someone else."
"Holy shit," I mutter. "Black case with skeletons on it?"
"Yeah." Her eyes lift, meeting up with mine. "It's like he was trying to get to her. To be with her." She shudders. "This is too freaky."
I take her hand and hold it. "Skye, think about the text. What it said."
"Yeah?"
"That's why she was distracted. Why she didn't pay attention to the road. It wasn't your fault. You get that now, right?"
"But I'm the one who told her to read it. I kept pushing her. Telling her she had to read it. This doesn't change anything, Travis. I'm still the reason she's gone."
"No. You don't get it. Marcus wouldn't have stopped. He would've kept texting if she hadn't responded but he dropped the damn phone in the river and didn't have her number."
"So he wouldn't have sent another text. Which means she would've kept driving without checking her phone and this never would've happened. I made her read that text, Travis." She gets up and walks behind the couch. "I feel even worse now than before. If it was just some text about nothing, she might not have gone off the road. But because it—"
"No." I jump up from the couch and go over to her. "Skye, you have to stop this. You can't keep blaming yourself for this. Amy had a choice. She didn't have to listen to you. She did because she wanted to read it. Because she loved Seth and wanted to see his message."
"But she wouldn't have known it was from him if I hadn't told her."
"Dammit, Skye, would you stop? You didn't do this! It was an accident! Anything could've made her go off the bridge that night. Messing with her hair. Looking in the mirror. Her hand slipping on the wheel."
"But those things wouldn't have been my fault."
"You'd make them your fault if you wanted to blame yourself for what happened. You'd say you should've stopped her. Taken the wheel when you felt the car swerving. Believe me, Skye, I've spent plenty of time trying to take the blame for Seth's accident. Telling myself I should've stopped him from taking the bike out that day. Or delayed him somehow so he wasn't there the moment that guy ran the light." I put my hands on her shoulders. "It doesn't work, Skye. Blaming yourself doesn't make it better. It doesn't take away the pain. It just makes it worse."
She's quiet and won't look at me, her eyes distant and focused behind me.
"I don't normally believe in fate," I tell her, "but part of me believes this was going to happen no matter what. That Seth and Amy were both meant to die that day. I know that sounds horrible and I hate saying it, or even thinking it, but I still feel like it's true."
I wait for her to respond but she doesn't.
"Skye, say something."
"I don't understand it."
"Understand what?"
"Why they had to die that day. If it really was their time to go...why? They were in love. They were just starting their lives. Why would that be the time? That day?"
"I don't know. I don't understand it either. All I know is it wasn't your fault and I'm going to keep telling you that until you believe it."
"If I wasn't on the bridge that night, we never would've met. And I was only on the bridge because of what happened to her."
"And I'm only living in this town because of what happened to Seth."
She finally looks at me. "So their deaths brought us together. That seems wrong, doesn't it?"
"No. It doesn't. We have something good here, Skye. We're good for each other and this is going to last. I know it is. What happened to Seth and Amy is a tragedy. But it brought us together. And knowing that...I don't know, maybe it sounds strange, but knowing that gives me peace. Since the moment I found this out, I've felt this peace like I haven't felt before. Like Seth is up there watching all this and smiling. With Amy at his side."
Tears slide down Skye's face, a soft smile forming. "I could totally picture that. She'd be in a white dress, her hair down, a big smile on her face. She wanted me to fall in love someday." She laughs a little. "She was such a romantic. I told her it'd never happen so I'm sure she's laughing right now seeing this. Seeing me totally in love with some guy."
"Seth would be the same way, except he'd be saying I told you so."
"Why?"
"Because I didn't think I'd ever settle down. I've always been more of a serial dater, not a relationship guy. But Seth said when I found the right girl, I'd never want to date again. I hate to say it but he was right." I look up toward the sky. "Here that bro? You were right. Bet you never thought you'd hear that." I look back at Skye, who's got a blank stare on her face. "You okay?"
"Yeah. I'm just shocked. About all of it."
"Why don't we get out of here and go get something to eat? We can talk more when we get back."
"I don't know if I want to. Talk, I mean. I need some time to let this sink in. Then maybe we can talk."
"We can talk whenever you want. I'm always here." I point to the sky. "You can talk to them too. I do. I talk to Seth all the time."
"I talk to Amy too."
"You do?"
"Almost every day. I talk to her photo."
"You never told me that."
"I thought you'd think I was crazy."
"Talking to her isn't crazy. I just told you I talk to Seth. And you saw me talking
to him at his grave. We do what we have to do to get through this. There's no right or wrong here."
She softly smiles. "I'm really glad you found me on the bridge that night."
I pull her in my arms. "I am too. You have no idea."
I saved her that night but I don't think it was just me. There was something calling me there, pulling me to take a different route that night. I'm thinking that something might've been Seth. Or maybe it was Amy. Or both of them. Something brought me to Skye that night. So I could save her.
And she could save me.
24
A Year Later
Skye
"Got an A on my project," I tell Amy. "My grades are almost as good as yours now."
Travis and I are standing in front of Amy's gravesite. I came here for the first time ten months ago. Now I stop here every time I come home to update her on what's new. I still talk to her photo sometimes but not as much as I used to. Talking to a dead person may seem odd but it's how I cope with her being gone. I probably won't do this forever, but right now I find comfort in coming here.
Travis and I also make regular visits to Seth's grave. And his dad's. Travis' dad died a couple months ago. Practically the whole town came to the funeral. All the locals knew him and most had been to his shop to get their car serviced back when he was running the place. Travis was shocked to see so many people there but also happy, knowing all those people cared about his dad.
It reminded me of Amy's funeral. So many people came it was standing room only at the church. She had so many friends, both from home and from school. I don't remember much about that day. I was too devastated by what had happened but I do remember feeling how loved she was by all the people there.
"She also got an internship," Travis says, wrapping his arm around me.
I playfully smack his chest. "Hey! I was supposed to tell her.”
"You were taking too long." He kisses me. "You should've started with that."
Turning back to Amy's stone, I say, "The internship starts in the spring. It's at the community center next to campus. I'll be doing graphic design work. Making posters. Invitations. Announcement flyers. That type of stuff."
With Every Breath Page 25
