Coyote tightened the knife to her throat; a drop of blood slid down her long pale neck. You know who I am.
Why? I raised my hands in surrender. “If you’re me… you love her as much as I do. Let… let her go.”
He slowly shook his head. Love?
I stuttered, “But… why?”
His brow furrowed. You know why.
I shook my head. “She is different. The Whites… she is different.”
He shook his head again. They’re all the same.
“No. Her blood doesn’t make her who she is.”
He gripped the blade tighter. She makes you weak.
Tears ran down my cheeks as I inched nearer, pleading with him. “No. Let… let her go. If you kill her…”
His eyes narrowed. You killed her, not me.
“No!” I dove forward, yelling and grabbing at his arm, but he was too fast. Julia’s eyes rolled back into her head as he released her body. She fell into my arms and the crimson blood flowed over me, staining my white sleeves. I shook as tears streamed down my face. “Julia! No, no, no… Julia!” I pulled her in, cradling her corpse in my arms. What have I done? I knelt there for what felt like forever, wishing for a miracle. My chest was an empty hole.
Rage filled me, and I looked up at Coyote, who stood, staring down upon me. I yelled in pain, “You killed her! Why?! Why?!”
You know why.
I screamed and lunged at him, but he used my momentum, throwing me into the ground. I whimpered, tears flowing down my cheeks. “Why?”
He looked across the field and pointed with his finger, silent.
I slowly returned to my feet and stood next to him, my gaze following his finger across the field. Bodies lay strewn across it, crimson staining the grasses as small fissures spread from them. “You killed them…”
His cold eyes bored into me. No, we killed them. There’s no Coyote without Ivan. He turned his head back towards the field. How many?
Looking across the field, I didn’t need to count the number, I knew how many. I sighed, looked down, and whispered softly, defeated, “Seventeen.”
Coyote looked at me, his eyes unrelenting, before looking back at Julia’s body. Eighteen.
Chapter 41
I awoke in a panic, breathing heavily and mumbling frantically.
Julia had my head in her lap, her hand softly stroking my hair. She spoke softly, “It’s okay, Ivan. You’re safe.”
I looked up at her. My heart felt ready to explode out of my chest. My mind was split, still trying to grasp my return to reality. “Wha…”
She ran her hand through my hair, trying to avoid the bruised area. “Shhh. It was just a nightmare.”
Nightmare. Right. I was still in shock. “You’re… you’re alive.”
She gave me a wry smile. “Dreaming about me?”
Not in the way you think. I took a deep breath. “Not like that… It was awful.”
She smiled softly and kept rubbing my head, trying to calm me. “Tell me about it.”
Hey, so I killed you. Well, technically it was Coyote, but he is me, so... I was a great boyfriend. I deflected. “It was just a nightmare.”
She looked concerned. “You sure? You look like you just saw a ghost.”
I groaned and closed my eyes. “Yeah, it’s fine.” It’s not fine.
She wasn’t convinced. Her lips pursed, and she looked around the room, thinking as we sat in silence for a few minutes. I felt better physically, but emotionally I had been hit by a truck. I just saw the woman I love die at my hand. Love? Is that it?
Someone knocked at the door and Julia jumped a bit. I reluctantly sat up and swung my legs back to the floor as she answered the door. “Already? Okay. Thank you, Michael.”
She glided back over to the couch. “I need to put together the final preparations before my guests arrive.” She looked at me reassuringly, her eyes understanding. “Do you need some time?”
I looked down at my hands and took a deep breath. “No, a walk would do me some good.” I put on a fake smile, so she wouldn’t worry. “Besides, who else would protect you from the boiling hot tea?”
Her eyes narrowed, understanding what I was trying to do, but she let it go. “Okay. Can you wait outside for a minute while I get ready?”
“Of course.”
With some effort, I rose and slid into the hall. Her handmaidens were waiting. Anne gave me a slight smile and entered the room, while Rachel gave a look of concern. “How are you, Ivan? I heard about what happened…”
I gave a small smile and responded calmly. “Don’t worry about it, Rachel. I’ll be alright. Thank you, though. I appreciate the concern.”
She still looked concerned but nodded and followed Anne into the room.
I leaned against the hallway wall and shut my eyes, thinking. My headache was better, but I couldn’t get past the image of Coyote, me, slicing Julia’s throat, his cold eyes boring into my soul. What was it trying to tell me? That I’m going to kill her?
It had been a long time since I had thought about my seventeen kills. I considered myself lucky that the number wasn’t higher, as I tried as hard as possible to avoid it, but each was still another weight on my shoulders: one that no words or attempted good deeds could remove. The last thing I wanted was to put Julia in danger. She meant too much to me for me to be responsible for something terrible happening to her. There’s no Coyote without Ivan. Is there Ivan without Coyote?
That didn’t even take into consideration what was about to happen to the Enclave and my friends while I was worried about my petty issues in the palace. Red Tags would be herded like cattle into camps to work until they starved or were shot for dissent. The Militia had thrived during the recent period of UPF complacency, but it appeared that those days were over. The UPF army itself would be raiding the Enclave soon, and a fire fight would not end well for us. They would take serious losses, but we were not prepared for all-out war. We were lucky they had left us mostly alone up until that point, seeing us as nothing more than a slight nuisance. With the flash drive and the publishing of the journal, though, we were now becoming a problem that had to be stomped out before we actually threatened their power. I was useless to help in my current state, right when they needed me the most. I need to radio Delaware.
Julia emerged, wearing a white cable knit sweater and jeans, followed by her handmaidens. She smiled at me softly. “Ready.”
I followed behind the girls and looked ahead at her, her ponytail bouncing behind her as she glided through the halls. It had been a rough couple of days, but in princess mode she held herself with poise and determination. She won’t die… not on my watch.
The party was to be held in the homier living room upstairs, near the royal family’s bedrooms. Here, carpeting covered the stone floor and a modern aesthetic contrasted with the more public and formal first floor of the palace. Julia spent a lot of time here reading or watching TV when not in her room or outside the royal grounds. She found it a good space to relax while not being cooped up alone in her room or the small parlor downstairs.
The space was a beautiful one for a gathering, with large ornate paned doors opening out onto a balcony at the rear of the palace. It was a fairly warm afternoon, so the doors were open, flooding the space with natural light and the scents of the Fall air. The small stone fireplace was lit as well, providing extra warmth and hominess to the room.
Julia ran her hand smoothly along the top of the light grey couch across from the fire as she glided through the room towards the maids, who were preparing for the guests’ arrival. Maria, a Green, began walking her through the drink and food options that were prepared for the evening. They chose a playlist of music, and the soft chords began to flow through the room.
It felt weird but satisfying to just sit back and watch Julia dance happily across the room in her socks, preparing for her friends. She deserves a fun evening. The living room and her bedroom were the only places she could be herself away from the other royals a
nd guests, who were not permitted upstairs unless given explicit permission. There, she somehow managed to look like a stunning princess while at the same time being a joyous and approachable girl. With her sweater hugging her frame softly and the comforting feel of the room, I just wanted to wrap her in my arms and sleep next to the fire. Seeing her happy made me forget the problems of the world for just a few seconds, and that was enough. Happy thoughts, Ivan.
She caught my staring from across the room and bit her lip in a bit of embarrassment. I just smiled, checked both directions to see no one was looking, and did a quick spin, landing with my arms extended like I was finishing a routine. With my concussion, though, I was more wobbly than expected, and I promptly lost my balance, flopping onto the floor. She giggled and held her hand softly to her face. Sometimes it’s the little things in life.
One by one, the guests arrived, and I tried and failed to catch and remember all their names as Julia met each one with a hug. They mingled throughout the room and grabbed drinks and hors d'oeuvres.
I felt like an intruder on their “girl time,” so I took my leave onto the empty balcony, out of earshot and radioed to Delaware. Her voice came over the radio, hesitant. “Hey, Coyote.”
It felt weird checking in now that she knew my secret. “Hey, Delaware. I heard the news…”
She waited a moment before responding. “Yeah… People are really worried. El Capitan is trying to figure out how we’re going to get through this. They’ve already started trying to grab people. It’s bad, Coyote.”
I was solemn. “Does he have a plan? Because I do, though, it is risky.”
“He wants to blow all the bridges between the Enclave and St. Paul except for the Smith Avenue High Bridge.”
He wants to fight. Stupid. “He doesn’t think going underground is a better idea? Try to remain undetected. We don’t have the firepower to take on their entire army and blowing the bridges won’t stop their air force from bombing the shit out of us.”
There was a delay. “I’m with him now. He says you might be right, but where would we hide? We don’t have enough safe houses to protect everyone.”
I paced along the balcony, looking over the garden and the lake beyond. “A full-on war isn’t an option without the support of the royal military. We all know that. We will use the safehouses and hide in friendly non-Red homes. It doesn’t matter how much space there is. We have to make it work or we all die. We need to execute Operation Blackout or everything we’ve done has been for nothing, and starting a war ends any possibility of pulling it off.”
Another delay. “He says that we all die while you get to sit in your palace.” That stung. I didn’t have a response for that brutal of a jab. “Coyote?”
I lowered the radio and thought for a second, fiddling with my royal servant pin before raising the radio to my mouth again. “If he wants to question my loyalty, he can say it to my face. Until then, I’m going to see what I can do to get as many of our people protection as possible instead of getting them killed in a failed last stand.”
She cut in. “Coyote, I agree with you. Just… give me time. I’ll try to convince him.”
“Thank you, Del. Coyote out.”
Pocketing the radio and leaning my arms against the stone railing along the edge of the balcony, I looked down onto the path below. El Capitan is going to get everyone killed.
After a few minutes, I turned and leaned back on the rail, looking back into the living room. Julia was sitting, legs crossed on the couch, laughing with her friends, more relaxed than I’d ever seen her in two months since we had met. That’s the girl I fell for.
Chapter 42
For the rest of the party I stayed out of their way. I highly doubted any of these increasingly tipsy girls were a threat to Julia’s life. Apparently, I’m more of the threat anyway. The image of Coyote’s black knife pressed against her neck flashed before my eyes and I flinched, holding my palm to my forehead. What is happening?
When I recovered, I stood against the wall near the stairs, watching curiously as the girls played some type of game that mainly involved a lot of laughing and giggling. Eventually, one of the Whites, whose name I believe was Mariana, called over to me drunkenly, “Hey, bodyguard. Come over here.”
I looked at Julia, questioning what was going on. She just giggled and called over, “It’s okay, Ivan.”
I tentatively shuffled over to them and stood at attention, hands behind my back, in front of the fireplace. “What can I do for you, m’lady?” Why is this scarier than most of my missions? Man, Ivan is a wimp…
The girls sat on the couches in a semi-circle in front of me. Mariana cocked her head and looked at me quizzingly. “What’s it like being the only Red Tag in the Royal Household?”
I squinted, confused, but responded flatly and formally. “It is an honor to serve the royal family and Princess Julia, m’lady.”
She wasn’t satisfied, and she continued her slurred persistence. “Oh, come on. It’s just us here. Nobody will tell the King and Queen.”
I appealed for intervention from Julia with my eyes, but she seemed interested in where this was going. I sighed. “It is an honor to serve. That wasn’t a lie. But it is always difficult to be an outlier, especially in a place like this. It is far better than the work I did before, but it has its own unique struggles.”
Mariana nodded, appeased, and I turned to return to my position before Julia interjected, “Stay, Ivan. We’re not done yet.”
I rolled my eyes but returned to the fireplace at attention. What is this? Did she tell them, and this is a relationship interrogation? Or is this another test?
Another of the royal friends, Vivian, bit her cheek before she spoke, “What do you think about us?”
“Us?”
She moved her arms in a sweeping motion around her. “The royals… in general?”
I looked at the ceiling and pondered for a second before looking at Julia and smiling. “There are some great people in royalty…” I hesitated and then returned my attention to Vivian. “…and there are some snakes in royalty.”
She seemed impressed and looked at Julia. “I thought he was a bodyguard, not a politician.” Julia giggled and gave me a sharp look. She’s challenging me. Wow. Is she seeing how I hold up against her friends? I could use the distraction…
I added a bit of sarcasm. “Sometimes we are more than we appear to be… Any other questions?”
They seemed entertained. Glad I can entertain some drunk royals while my friends try to survive. Hey, at least Julia will owe me after this and can help find people to host the Reds.
Another royal, Ilana, took her turn eagerly. “What was your first impression of Julia?”
I bit my cheek to hold back a grin and looked at Julia, who had her eyebrows raised curiously. “She was someone who needed help, and I was there to help.”
She pushed. “Your actual first impression.”
I sighed reluctantly. “I thought she was brave… and cute,” smiling a little at the end.
That was met by sarcastic oohs and Julia biting her lip.
Ilana quickly jumped in again, eager. “Do you have a girlfriend?”
I scoffed. “My job is my girlfriend. I’m here on a Saturday night, so I think that says enough.” I won’t lose this battle of wits.
Alice, the Yellow college friend, jumped in. She was one of the few other under-Greens who had been in the palace, both of us because of Julia. “And you were the one that stopped Isaac Preus, right?”
I held my hand tentatively to my head. “That’s a nice way to put getting beat over the head with a rock.”
She smirked. “So, you’re single and fought with the guy Julia was betrothed to.”
“Well he jumped me, so…” I can’t tell if they know and are messing with me or what?
Olivia kept on the pressure. “Sounds like you were willing to sacrifice a lot for her.”
“That is my job.” Don’t you dare…
She raised her
eyebrows. “Seems like more than a job.”
I didn’t hold back the sarcasm and narrowed my eyes. “Perhaps.”
Mariana jumped back in. “So, you don’t have any feelings for her?”
I bit my cheek and looked down, dang it. “I don’t know if…”
Vivian insisted. “Answer the question.”
I cocked my head and looked at Julia with my eyebrows furrowed. Apparently, this falls under the category of “unless I say so.” “What is this?”
She smiled reassuringly, looking like she was trying to avoid laughing. “You can trust them Ivan.”
I sighed, and my mouth betrayed me. “Yes, I do.”
The girls erupted in excitement, and I decided that this was the point of this charade, but why? Girls are confusing. Royals are confusing. Drunk royal girls are really confusing.
They pulled Julia off the couch and pushed her towards me while I looked at her inquisitively, asking her non-verbally if they knew about us. She stood in front of me giggling and gripping my blazer, her bright blue eyes gazing into mine, alight with passion. She whispered, “They knew. I wanted to see how long it would take for you to give in.”
Shaking my head, half-annoyed half-entertained, I whispered in her ear, “You’re lucky I like you, a lot.”
I was suddenly extremely conscious of the fact we were basically surrounded by a sea of eager eyes. This is worse than the UPF. Someone yelled at me to kiss her, and I was too stunned to react at first.
Eventually, I came to my senses, wrapped my arms around her waist and kissed her, slower and longer this time. It was weirdly freeing to be a little less in the dark, her closest friends aware of, and apparently supportive of, us. This was met with a few awws followed by a sudden deathly silence.
We pulled back and noticed the girls staring towards the stairs. We followed their eyes and my heart sank. Oh come on…
Chapter 43
Apparently, the girls had made quite the ruckus, and Alexandria had come to investigate. She stood between the hall to the girls’ bedrooms and the staircase, gawking like a child looking at the tree on Christmas morning. The world seemed to freeze for a moment. Julia and I stood holding each other and looking at her sister before coming to terms with the situation and stepped back from each other awkwardly. In ten minutes, I went from thinking three other people knew about our relationship to fourteen. At this rate, the whole palace will know by Monday.
The Fractured Prism (The Prism Files Book 1) Page 19
