Had he ever walked into a room and thought to get me a drink? I didn’t think so. Mitch was always looking for his friends, and I never questioned it, but now with Gray walking toward me, two cups in his hand, his eyes locked fully on mine, it was clear that Mitch and I had been missing something.
Maybe this was what it was supposed to be like, friendship and attraction mixed together so that you didn’t know if you liked the person because of the way they made you feel or because of the swoony, fluttery things that happened in your stomach when you looked at them.
I was dangerously close to wanting more from Gray Turner than swim lessons.
Chapter Sixteen
Gray
I was trying too hard. Or at least that’s how I felt putting on cologne for a lake party that I would have normally attended in board shorts and probably wouldn’t have even showered for.
But then Addy showed up in those jeans.
This couldn’t just be in my head. It couldn’t. Even the atmosphere in the car was different than our usual carpool trips. There were no jokes or burns, and even walking into the party together felt like a couple move.
Once we found Simon and sat together, I had to take a moment to marvel at the picture window view over the lake. It rivaled the ocean views in Encinitas for sure.
“So you’re not nervous?” I asked Addy, bumping her with my shoulder.
“Nervous? About what?”
“Messing up all that nice makeup when I throw you in that lake.”
“I’m a Minnesota girl, loser. I’m not afraid of a lake. But if you’re scared, you can just sit on the docks.” Her ability to hide her sarcasm behind a champion-level poker face used to bug me, but now I teased her on purpose just to get her going.
“Just watch out for the eels,” Simon chided.
Addy giggled into her red solo cup.
“Very funny,” I answered. Then after taking a drink of my own, I watched Simon for a sign he was joking.
“Time to suit up!” Willow announced to the party. Addy disappeared into the basement with the rest of the girls as I changed quickly in one of the guest bathrooms.
The guys walked down to the lake before the girls since it took them longer to change. It was still pretty light out as the sun started to sink behind the tall trees on the opposite side of the lake. It made for a gorgeous view, reflecting the orange and pink sky on the water.
“Wow,” I said to Simon.
“Yeah, this party is worth the view alone.”
The girls came hiking down the trail behind us, and I was struck for a moment by Addy in a bikini. I was so used to seeing her in a one-piece in the pool, that something about this casual skin-revealing two-piece turned me into an idiot.
“You okay?” she asked, slugging my shoulder when it was clear that I couldn’t even look at her.
“Yeah. Yeah...” I stammered. My brain couldn’t even manage a simple sarcastic quip!
Addy sort of backed up, probably thinking my lack of comeback was aimed more at her instead of because of her. I really needed to pull myself together.
“Alright, ladies first!” Freddy announced as he pushed an unexpectant Willow off the dock.
“See you later…” Addy said, walking toward the water. Then she glanced back and threw in, “Loser,” with a sly wink.
And maybe it was just me, but I saw it as an invitation. As some of the girls casually jumped in followed by a couple guys, I stepped up behind Addy, scooped her up with one arm and launched us both off the dock and into the frigid water.
She managed one quick yelp before we were both under, but we came up laughing as she splashed me in the face.
“Gray Turner, you’re going down!”
She actually tried to dunk me which was adorable. Launching herself onto my head, I could only laugh as I easily went under. It became more of an awkward wrestle since neither of us could touch the bottom. We both kept bobbing under and popping out, not paying much attention to what everyone else was doing.
“Alright, you two lovebirds,” Willow called from the docks. “It’s time to race.”
Addy and I separated quickly, noticing the rest of the team was on the platform in a line ready to dive in.
“You’re up,” I said, pushing her toward the other girls. I swam over to the shallow shore where most of the guys were watching from. A few others were in a line a little farther away, which I assumed was supposed to be a turn line.
Addy climbed up out of the water and stood shivering next to the other girls, waiting for someone to call it. “Swimmer’s choice,” Willow called from the end. “To the boys and back. You know the drill!”
Then, Freddy called the “ready, set, go,” and the girls all dived into the water. I half-expected the same clumsy swimmer I met back in August, but Addy’s dive was clean and impressive. She managed to do the actual freestyle stroke all the way down, and to my utter amazement as I cheered her on the entire way, she didn’t come in last. When she reached the end and noticed the two other girls straggling behind her, she swam over to me celebrating like she came in first.
She flung her arms around my neck. “Did you see that?!”
“I did! You swam freestyle!”
“And I didn’t come in last!” She said as she peeled herself off of me, but she said it a little too loudly as one of the freshmen who was pretty far behind her in the race walked by. “Oh, sorry,” Addy muttered, and we both had to bite back our laughter.
A moment later, I stood on the dock between Freddy and Simon, while Addy watched from the grassy shore wrapped in a towel. “Swimmer’s choice?” I asked, which was a rhetorical question, really. At least for the guys it was. This was a race, and the fastest stroke for anyone would be freestyle, so choosing anything else would be a joke.
Which is why no one answered.
When Willow called “go” from the other end of the line, we all dived in with more force than I’d seen in the pool. This was possibly more competitive than our actual competitions.
Immediately, I was struck with how much the cold water affected my speed. On top of that, the water wasn’t as still as the pool so trying to do the regulation stroke wasn’t going to cut it because I wasn’t getting a good enough inhale on the head turn. About halfway down, I ditched my form and focused on speed. I could feel Freddy directly next to me on the right. And Simon’s kicks next to my head on the left, which meant the rest of the guys were easily far behind.
But it bugged the hell outta me that I couldn’t get a good gain on Freddy. I should have been dominating, but I just couldn’t get ahead.
Then, we came to the turn. I assumed they did a there-and-back race to mimic the pool, but after trying to flip and gain momentum coming back, I was convinced they did it for laughs because it had to be downright comical watching us all try to turn around without a wall to propel from.
Still, I kept Freddy at my side. Simon was now far ahead and definitely going to beat us both, but I wasn't worried about him. I just wanted to touch that platform before the captain. I had to touch that platform before the captain. My entire reputation depended on it.
And I could feel his desperation too. He was gasping and thrashing through the water the same way I was. At the very end, I could hear the girls chanting, and I noticed them cheer a good two seconds before Freddy and I reached the finish line at exactly the same time.
Simon won by a longshot. And Freddy and I tied.
Which meant I lost.
When I popped out of the water and looked at Addy, she was clapping and smiling, but that was it. It was like she knew that that was not the outcome I wanted, and I tried not to let it bother me. It was just a fun race, but it was still a shot to my ego.
Freddy slugged my shoulder as we both gasped for air. “Dang, Turner. You gave me a run for my money!” He seemed pretty happy about it, and I was just being dramatic, but all I could think was that I was supposed to be the standout. I was supposed to be the one the scouts noticed. The one who got
the scholarship.
And at the moment, I felt like just another mediocre high school swimmer with no future in the sport at all.
Addy
We all sat on the dock for a while. The kids who were smart enough to bring towels shared with the ones who didn’t. This was a tradition I could get behind. Especially since it meant Gray and I were huddled together under a plush blue beach towel. A month ago he would have sat stick straight, making every effort to avoid contact. Tonight, however, we sat knee to knee, his hand running up and down my ribcage like it were the keys of a piano. I shivered, and not just because our short autumn was beginning to turn to winter.
Soon enough, people began to wander back up toward the house. The lake was beautiful and all, but it was no match for pizza after a hard swim. I was torn between wanting food and never wanting to do anything but sit in the crook of Gray’s arm. I waited till everyone else had left before I asked if he thought we should go back up with the group.
“I’m not all that hungry,” he said, clearing his throat. “You should get something to eat, though.”
He moved to take the towel off and hand it to me, but I stayed where I was. It was sweet of Gray to offer me the towel. More than sweet, but I wasn’t going to leave him down there alone. Not when his easy smile had turned into a worried look.
“Are you still thinking about the race?” I asked. “You shouldn’t let it bother you. You’re not used to swimming in a lake like Simon and Freddy. They literally grew up with lakes in their backyard.”
Gray rubbed his hands together nervously, reminding me that they were no longer warming my side. I scooted closer waiting for an answer.
“I don’t mind losing, but if a scout were to come, and I lost then… No one is looking at the guy in second place, Addy.” There was such genuine concern behind his blue eyes that it was hard not to feel exactly what he was feeling. Except I knew better. I knew that Gray would beat his PR and impress the scouts. That or he would find another way to get the scholarship he needed to be a collegiate swimmer. He didn’t give up. That was the thing about him. If he were a quitter he never would have taken me up on my deal to carpool in exchange for lessons in the first place.
“I know there is a lot of pressure on you to get a scholarship.”
“Not pressure, Addy. It’s my only option. My mom is working doubles to pay the bills we have. She can’t pay out-of-state tuition for me to go to school in California. She couldn’t afford in-state tuition.”
“You could always ask your dad to let you declare his address for residency.”
“Not an option,” said Gray, his voice growing cold.
I knew Gray didn’t have a great relationship with his dad, but I didn’t realize it was so bad that he couldn’t swallow his pride and ask him to help him with school. If my family were divided like that, I don’t know what I would do. Suddenly I felt very lucky to be a part of my own boring household.
“Well,” I said, seeing my chance to turn the mood around. “I guess there is only one solution?”
“What’s that?” asked Gray, he kept his eyes cast out over the water. A sure sign that he was in a mood. It reminded me of the first time we drove together, when I jumped his car. Only, I had him figured out now, and I wasn’t going to let him turn tonight into a pity party.
I let out a deep sigh. “I’m going to have to give you private lessons. Someone has to teach you how to beat your record. It might as well be me. I have a solid track record of improving.”
Gray couldn’t prevent his lips from twisting up into a small smile. It was reserved, but it was there. “We’ll start with the freestyle,” I continued, nudging him in the ribs. “After what I saw today, I’d wager that needs the most work.”
Gray shook his head. The cologne he’d worn to the party had faded in the water, and that stress free, happy expression he wore when taking his place in my passenger seat was gone but so was the furrowed brow he’d worn just a moment ago.
“Thanks, but no thanks,” said Gray, slipping his arm back around my waist. “I’m fairly certain your coaching would be more distracting than productive.”
I shrugged my shoulders before laying my head on his shoulder. “I offered anyway.”
The two of us stayed on the dock until the orangey blue sunset became a landscape of stars. Twice, I was certain I felt his lips graze my hair, but I didn’t say anything. Not even when his hand slipped into mine.
Chapter Seventeen
Gray
I wasn’t entirely sure what Addy and I qualified as after the night on the dock. My first reaction when she let me hold her hand was that that was it: we were officially not carpooling buddies anymore. But then she dropped me off that night and nothing happened, and I started to wonder if it was all in my head again.
Regardless, when she insisted that she take me costume shopping on Sunday to prepare for next week’s party, I was walking on air. Between that and my disaster of a race, there was no chance of sleeping that night.
All I kept thinking was that I should have won the race, and I should have kissed her.
When she picked me up the next day, she came with a list of options for me. “Okay, so I’m thinking that you really have to play up the west coast thing. Everyone will love it.”
“Okay,” I obliged with a smile. I didn’t really care what the other students would like, but I was happy to listen to whatever Addy wanted.
“You could really have that David Hasselhoff vibe if you let me do your hair.”
“I have to draw the line somewhere,” I answered.
She tried to give me a puppy dog face, but I simply shook my head and looked away. She laughed and slugged my arm as we pulled into the parking lot of the big pop-up Halloween store. We weren’t back at the friendly, arm-slugging place again, were we?
There was a good, uncertain arm’s length between us as we strolled through the parking lot. Upon entering the store, we were immediately ambushed by a giant automatic zombie that jumped out of its grave. Addy grabbed my arm as we both jumped.
“You gotta be tougher than that,” I teased, but when she didn’t let go of my arm, I pulled her closer.
“Here we go,” she said as she pulled me over to the men’s section. First she pointed to a large, full-body shark costume with a far too excited expression on her face.
“Walk away.” Keeping her hand in mine, I pulled her toward the simpler costumes...like cops and construction workers.
“Boooorrring,” she drawled.
“Look,” I said, pulling a costume off the rack. “They even have a sexy cop.” Holding it up to my body, Addy let out a long cackle.
“Oh my god, I would pay so much money to see you in those tiny shorts and mustache,” she howled. We were pretty much causing a scene, but I didn’t care.
She complained a lot when I put it back, but I caught her snatching it up when I wasn’t looking. “At least try it on,” she joked.
“You still haven’t told me what you’re dressing up as,” I said as we meandered around the store.
She disappeared behind an aisle and reappeared with a horse head. “It’s a surprise.” After pulling it off and putting it back, she continued. “Besides, I have to do that shopping with Lucy and Nora. It’s not something I can buy alone.”
“You guys really are best friends, aren’t you?” We spoke to each other over the top of the display, and she disappeared again.
This time, she popped up with a gorilla mask. “Of course, we are. I’ve known Lucy and Nora since I was six. Don’t you have a best friend?” Snatching the mask off her face, she laughed.
“I had friends...but they’re all back in California.”
“I couldn’t live without them,” she replied. “We do everything together.”
When she dropped behind the aisle again, I grabbed an alien face from the rack and waited for her to pop back up. We both cracked up when she appeared with the same green face. “I hate to break it to you, loser,” I said. “But I th
ink you’re the best friend I have in Delinki.”
“Lucky me,” she answered.
When we stopped acting like children, we got back to our task of finding me a costume. We stood together in front of a wall of pretty generic costumes. I called them safe...Addy called them boring. “Perfect,” she said, grabbing a lifeguard uniform. She stepped up next to me, and before I could second guess it, I put my arm over her shoulder.
“It even has a whistle and a little boogie board thing,” she said, holding it up.
“And a shirt,” I added.
“Pity.”
With a laugh, I squeezed her closer. Then she turned up to look at me, a bright smile stretching across her face, and our eyes met in a long, tense moment. I felt myself pulling closer as her smile faded. It was quite possibly the longest moment of my life as I waited, wanting her to close the distance, just in case I was crazy and imagining the chemistry between us. What if I tried to kiss her, and she shot me down? Our entire friendship would be wrecked.
I swear I felt her move toward me. If just for one second, she inched closer, and maybe it was that tiny movement that set off the screeching witch on the shelf next to our heads, but we both jumped in response. It was probably for the best that our first kiss wasn’t in the presence of that gimmicky green-faced hag.
We both awkwardly laughed off the moment, and she pushed me toward the dressing room. “Okay, Baywatch. Go try this on.”
“Fine,” I answered. As soon as I was in the private stall, my head landed with a thud against the mirror. If anyone had told me two weeks ago that kissing Addy Altman was my biggest ambition, I would have thought they were nuts.
Addy
Gray Turner was in the dressing room trying on a lifeguard costume that was a not-so-subtle rip-off of Baywatch. It only took half a week and a lot of arguing to convince him that going to Mitch’s party as a Californian would be tongue-in-cheek and not fuel for the guys to tease him. We planned the trip on the bus ride home from our last swim meet. Back before all the lines between us began to blur.
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