“Absolutely, and any other bastard-born children my father sired, which I am sure is many. He wasn’t kind, and I’m sure as we move deeper into repairing the damages, we’ll discover many other children he sired and abandoned. But this is now, not the past. Whatever happened back then, it was then, and we are not there anymore. We are the future, and we decide what happens now.”
“And my child, if we create one and I decide not to remain with him past one year and a day as I have vowed?” Her words were hesitant, partly because her mind wasn’t made up yet. She was unsure what she wanted, and while she enjoyed being with Asrian as they had been, she wasn’t one hundred percent sure she wanted more from him. Not to mention, her child would be unable to ascend to her throne if he left, or if the Horde didn’t back them with their strength.
“Lilith?” Asrian growled.
“I don’t know what the future holds, but if we are to create a child, I need to know it is protected from those who wouldn’t accept him as king.”
“They’ll accept him, or they will die,” he sneered.
“I will make him king, and any who don’t respect it will be the given the same option I already listed.” Ryder’s tone carried finality, the confidence of the king backing his own words. “Now, get dressed; we waste time, and your father has to decree you his heir before he leaves this plane for the next. I don’t want to have to rack fucking heads together to make my point.”
Ryder vanished from the room, and Asrian sat up, naked still. He turned his angry glare towards her, hurt mirroring in them. “Get dressed,” he ordered, not bothering to use his glamour to assist her.
“You’re angry?” she demanded as she stood naked, uncaring of the welts and bruises his hands had created over the time they’d shared in bed.
“You’re damn right I’m fucking angry! I told you three days ago, if we do this, you’re mine. Yet the first fucking chance you get, you plan to leave me. You ask my brother to accept our son should we have one because why, Lilith? Because you don’t want my child sitting on your throne? He wouldn’t be good enough for you? You’ve met us, you’ve met the king, and yet you’re so fucking stuck in your ways and your beliefs that we’re nothing but monsters that you’d throw any child we had away at the first chance!”
“That isn’t what…”
“Get dressed!” he shouted, slamming the door closed in her face as he stormed out of the room, his hurt and anger flooding it until pain shot through her, as if he was feeding her every ounce of pain back he’d stolen all at once.
Her knees hit the floor, and she sat there, uncertain what the hell was happening as her heart raced and she felt nauseated. Tears burned her eyes, blurring her vision. A soft sob escaped her lips before she squelched it with the back of her hand. What the hell was wrong with her? Why had his anger and rejection felt like she was dying? She struggled back up to her feet, holding her chest as it tightened.
With effort, she dressed and slowly exited the room with one last glance at the crumpled sheets, leaving whatever had been forming between them in the room. She made it into the hallways before Synthia was there; the Queen of the Horde took one look at Lilith and her smile vanished.
“Oh, sweet baby Jesus,” she muttered as she took in the crumpled riding dress and mussed hair. A breeze of soothing air brushed over Lilith, and she paused, looking down at the dress that was black and silky, a wealth of material that seemed as if it had been plucked from the shadows to create a masterpiece. Her hair was twisted and turned, and then a few loose curls were hanging from a braid that sat tight, yet comfortable on her head. “Much better,” she muttered to herself before smiling, and the heavy weight of weapons were felt on her back and sides. “Do try not to stab or shoot my husband with them, I’m very partial to him. He doesn’t get to get off that easy, not after giving me three babes at once.”
“Okay,” Lilith agreed as she stared at the Queen of the Horde, who looked almost human in her features. “Rumor has it you tried to kill him a few times?”
“Lilith, first rule about me is I don’t try to do anything. I just do it.”
“And the throat you ripped out?”
“Tasted like shit, but it drove the point home,” she shrugged.
“It’s not easy to forget the past.”
“No, it’s not supposed to be either. You lived it, but you survived. You’re stronger for it, are you not?”
“I am.”
“Then stop worrying about the past and look to the future. I understand your court was hit the hardest, but that wasn’t by the king who now holds the Horde. Just as you are not responsible for what your people have suffered under your father’s rule. That is why there are rules to the hierarchy. It’s why there are heirs in place in the lesser Fae courts, isn’t it?”
“It is.”
“Then why do you blame him?”
“He was there,” Lilith pointed out. “They were all there.”
“They didn’t want to be there, and from what I have heard, they were busy getting people out and risking their own lives to do so. I’ve watched him suffer endlessly for what his monster of a father ordered him to do. They’re all fucked up for it, and yet that is the way of the Horde. They are the strongest caste in the entire world of Faery not because they played by the rules, but because they created them. They’ve worked tirelessly alone to save Faery. Everyone else pretended it wasn’t dying, and yet these men fought to cure and fix it. That should speak of their character alone. You don’t know them yet, but you will, Lilith. You’re our family now, you are one of us.”
“I don’t think I will be past the year and day, Queen of the Horde.”
“My name is Synthia, Goddess of the Fae. Meaning, all of the Fae, Lilith, even the lesser courts. I’m guessing you two had a fight, but what I have heard for the past few days wasn’t fighting. It was the beginning of something good, something pure. Find it again.”
“We’re ready to ride, Syn,” a tall blonde said as he strode to stand beside them.
“Thank you, Lachlan,” she acknowledged.
“No problem, I came to peek at the dame who has Asrian in a rage. Pretty sure he just destroyed a few demons outside because of it.”
“A few? Must not be that angry.”
“Thousand. A few thousand demons which have been gathering out front of here for a couple of days. Erie is out being his cheerleader, although I’m pretty sure he didn’t notice her. She is pretty, isn’t she?” he murmured as he reached out and touched one of the black curls that trailed down her back. “Exquisite, really. And here father seemed so put out when they offered their daughters to pay the tithe. Idiot, his loss,” he said absently.
“Don’t worry, we chose a bride for you as well, Lachlan.”
“I’ve been warned,” he chuckled. His tri-colored eyes reminded her of the seas as he watched her. “I’m almost intrigued to meet mine. Almost, but not enough to do so,” he smirked as he let his hand drop and turned to smile at Synthia. “I’ll be outside to escort you to Ryder when you’re ready.”
“He doesn’t address you as his queen?”
“No, we’re not formal here, not unless we’re in front of the courts. Sometimes even then we’re not. It’s our court; we tend to run it like we want to.”
Lilith stared at Synthia’s back as they headed down the hallway. She thought of what Asrian said, and what she thought. It hadn’t been that she wouldn’t want her son or theirs to be king; the people wouldn’t, and she had needed to hear his brother say he’d protect them. She’d needed to know her child and his claim would be backed and that he’d be safe.
“Tell him that, exactly that,” Synthia said with a backwards glance.
“Holy shit, you can read minds?” Lilith gasped.
Synthia shrugged and then nodded. “Sometimes, sometimes not,” she explained. “I’m new to this Goddess thing, but some of the things happening are handy. Some are rather a nuisance.”
“Noted.”
Chapter 16
&nb
sp; They entered the Night Court just as the moon reached its precipice. Lilith stopped outside the gates, nodding to the guards before she tipped her head up and stared at the stars that burned brightly, as if they sensed that the Night Court needed their welcoming light.
Asrian had ignored her for the entire trek to the upper lands, and then Lachlan, one of his brothers she’d learned, had sifted her the rest of the way here. He hadn’t said one word, not even looked in her direction that she’d noticed.
“You’ve come with them?” one of the guards whispered in a hiss loud enough that the others caught the same hesitancy, fear, and loathing that dripped from his tone.
“Yes, Lain, I have come with them, now open the gates and let us in. It was not a request,” she hissed back, squaring her shoulders and staring him directly in the eye. Here she wasn’t Lilith; she was Heir to the Night and Queen of the Shadow Court. Here, she was the cold creature she’d been bred to be. “Unless you’d like to see what your heart looks like outside your body, open the fucking gate. I will not ask again.”
“As you wish, Shadow Queen,” he replied, peering over her head at where the Horde stood, waiting.
They walked into the central courtyard, fearful murmurs following them as they passed through, entering the main entrance as one large group. Liliana was covered in lace, her face hidden from those who would remember it. The inside of the castle was filled with the court’s council and her sisters, all who stood as she entered, staring at her with something cold in their eyes. She was heir by right, but any of her sisters could challenge it if they dared. Luckily, they’d preferred to spend their days being pampered and tended to rather than wielding blades or training.
“Clear the room, leave the council, and one of the bloodline may remain. Summon the head of the guard and any officials who are not present,” she announced as she headed towards the bed that sat in the middle of the room, candles burning around it as the death rattle sounded from her father’s lungs.
She didn’t falter as she approached, showing no fear even though the knowledge that he was dying hurt deeply. Lilith hadn’t expected it to hurt, not this much. He was a selfish bastard, but he was her father. Leonidas had kept the court running; he’d fought off the other courts’ sad attempts to take it by force, even though none had come close to succeeding. He’d sucked at being a father. But then, other factors played into it and everything else that had forged her life into what it was. Once the guards had entered, she stood beside the bed where her father lay, dying.
“Who was protecting him?” she asked, watching the guards who stared back at her, eyes hard and filled with hatred. “I asked you a question. This is where you answer me.”
“We don’t answer to you. He’s chosen a new heir, as you are soiled now.”
Lilith turned to the council member who had spoken. She smiled. “Then bring her out, and I will challenge her now.”
“That law is outdated,” he snapped.
“Please, tell me how he made it known that he’d chosen a new heir.”
“He told us,” he lied.
“His throat is punctured by an iron blade, so how was he able to speak to tell you such a thing?”
“I am the heir now, Lilith. You’ve betrayed us,” Hannah said firmly as she plucked an invisible piece of lint from her skirt, unable to make eye contact. “Therefore, I am the new Queen of the Night Court.”
“Who was protecting our father, Hannah?” she asked again.
“I was, but the assassin was from your court, Queen of Shadows. Everyone knows shadows cannot be stopped.”
“I have no court left, everyone knows that,” Lilith laughed. She eyed the guard and where his hand went, to the iron blade that he wielded. Lilith could smell the blood on it; her bloodline’s blood had been drawn with it. “You are aware of the powers that the Court of Night’s bloodline wields, are you not?”
“You can control minds, wield the moon’s power, and are stronger and faster than every court except the Court of Shadows.”
“You forget, we can smell when our blood has been drawn by a certain weapon or enemy. My father’s blood is on your blade, William.” She didn’t wait for him to respond. Instead, she turned into shadows and entered the three armed guards at once, splitting them apart from the inside as her shadows ripped and tore them to pieces. Screams erupted; blood sprayed and splattered the walls around Lilith as she solidified. “Anyone else help dethrone my father while I was out?”
“You can’t do this! I am the chosen heir!” Hannah said as she stomped her foot and pumped her fist down at her side.
“You traitorous bitch,” Lilith said in a deadly hiss before she sent her shadows to wrap around her sister’s throat. Slowly, very slowly the air left her throat. Blood exploded from her lips, and her eyes went wide with horror before going limp. “An attack against the king is treason, so if any of you helped, you’ll get this offer only once. Leave; stay and betray me and you will die.”
“You’re soiled! Even soiled he wouldn’t agree that you weren’t fit to be our queen!” Claudette, an elder Fae who looked as if she was at least a few thousand years old, screamed. “They killed our queen! They killed an entire court, and in their wake, they left their little bastards scattered all over the lower lands. You are not fit to be queen now, not with their taint on you or already growing within your womb.” She cried out as her head tilted at an odd angle. Lilith smiled hauntingly as the woman’s corpse crashed to the floor.
“I am not soiled, and they did not murder my mother.”
“I watched it happen with my own eyes!” Lariat growled but didn’t step forward.
“Oh, Lariat,” my mother crooned as she lifted the lace veil. “You always were sweet, but they didn’t kill me, they actually saved me. Had it not been for them, Alazander would have murdered me, and yet my beloved king wouldn’t intervene or even beg for me, but you did.”
Her hand touched his scarred face with a gentleness that was unsettling. They were familiar in a way that made Lilith give her mother some serious side-eye. Now was not the time for that shit. People gasped and rushed forward.
“Our queen is back! We are saved!”
A hand touched Lilith, and she looked down at her father, who was staring with wide eyes at her mother. His eyes moved between them, and then he pulled on her until she lowered next to him.
“Mmm…” he struggled to get the words out past the damage of his throat. Synthia moved closer and his eyes rounded as he took in the glow that resonated from her. Her hand touched mine and then his, and he was there, in her head.
“Mother…?”
“Is alive,” she said out loud.
“You’re my heir, my daughter. You’re my soul, Lilith. The best of me,” he said gently in her head. His eyes went wide as the tears filled Lilith’s eyes, which she wiped away before anyone else could see the weakness. “You can hear me.”
“I can hear you, father,” she admitted, her eyes lowering to hold his. “Synthia is the Goddess of the Fae, the Horde King’s wife.”
“I need you to know I’m sorry. I’m sorry my grief consumed me. I’m so sorry I couldn’t look at you without seeing her and hurting. I should have been better, more present. Instead, I pretended the court had remained the same, holding parties and locking out those who needed us. You’ll have to fix it back to what it was, the glorious Night Court. The beauty it held; you can do that because you hold enough that the moon Goddess will bless you.”
“I’m sorry you failed too because I needed you. I needed my parents, and instead of losing just one on that day, I lost you both. It’s in the past, though, and I forgive you. I forgive you both,” she said loud enough for her mother to hear.
She stepped back as her mother stepped closer, staring down into her husband’s eyes. “I relinquish the Night Court or any hold I held on it. I give it to the daughter we created, your heir. I don’t forgive you for neglecting her or locking her in a room. She was your heir, the moon in your sky and
stronger than you could ever hope to be. You knew being of two courts would be hard on her, and yet she has yet to be trained to use your court’s power. Did you see how she killed, how she defended you? She murdered your attackers using my power, not yours. You failed her, and you will die knowing that. The Goddess will not forgive you easily for failing her. I forgive you for what you did to me, and what you did in your grief, but allowing our daughter to travel to the Horde Kingdom to retrieve what she thought was my corpse? Never. She was only a child, Leonidas! Our child, born of a love brighter than the moon and stars you so adore, and yet she traveled alone, unprotected through her enemies’ courts to the High Fae lands; that is something not even the strongest of your warriors could have done.”
He blinked as Lilith watched, his shoulders trembling with unshed tears he refused to let drop. She wanted to defend him, but her mother wasn’t wrong. Plus, unless she wanted to openly support her father and challenge her mother and her words, she’d have to bite her tongue. She hated politics already.
“Enough,” she announced. “I will rise to Queen tonight since the king is unable to rule any longer. Prepare the ceremony and open the gates to the kingdom.”
“The people are upset, starving! They could loot or worse, there must be precautions taken,” a member of the council said.
“I said open the gates; they’re starving because you failed to speak your mind on the matter. You wanted to feed them, to bring them into the safety of the court, yet you said nothing. So we will let them in and feed them. Have the kitchen prepare a feast, quickly. Something easy, and enough to feed an entire caste of Fae,” she continued.
“And a king? They will demand you claim one for the ceremony. Even if you don’t mean to keep one, or decide on another later,” she continued.
Lilith’s eyes moved to where Asrian leaned against the back wall, staring at Lilith with amusement in his emerald depths. She turned her head to the council member, who frowned.
“Cade will offer for your hand if you are queen, he has shown interest, even with everything that happened. He has made it known he will accept you still.”
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