by Alexia Purdy
“You’re having twins. Want to know what their sexes are?”
I turned, snapping my eyes to my aunt. “How do you see that?”
“Let’s just say there aren’t many midwives in the Unseelie realm. I was often called to help the Sluagh and Unseelie alike birth their offspring. It was something I kind of fell into.”
“Oh.” I wrapped my arms around my body, feeling cold yet hot at the same time. “Should I know? I mean, would it benefit me to know? Everything is different here in Faerie. In the human realm, it’d be too early to get an ultrasound.”
“It’s up to you. Let me place my hand on your stomach.” She held out her hands, waiting for me to give her the signal to proceed. I nodded and dropped my arms as she approached. She placed her palm against my lower abdomen and closed her eyes.
“Two boys, but not identical,” she said softly as she scrunched her eyebrows together, concentrating. “How odd. They share your blood, but they do not share the same auras.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I stepped back, wondering if this had been a good idea.
“It means they do not share the same parentage. You carry both your husbands’ children. An uncommon but not completely rare occurrence in the fey.”
My eyes widened. “What?” How would I tell Soap and Dylan? What kind of a person has two children at the same time with two different fathers? I groaned and began pacing the room. Only in Faerie would something like this happen. Sometimes I wished I hadn’t married a faery at all. It was so complicated.
“It’s not impossible. Magic plays a part, of course. Be happy. They are healthy; their energy is strong. You, on the other hand, need some relief for that nausea.”
“I was wondering about that. Isn’t it too early for morning sickness?”
“This will not be like a human pregnancy, Shade. Don’t expect things to happen the same way or according to the same schedule. I can whip up some potions for you to drink in the mornings or whenever the feeling occurs. And you need to eat more. You’re impossibly thin.” She reached out and placed a hand on my shoulder, and I stopped wearing a hole in the carpet to meet her gaze.
“Why do you care now?”
“I never stopped caring. I needed to protect Jade and her children. I had to leave or risk you all.”
I swallowed down the knot forming in my throat. She hadn’t left because she’d wanted to. She’d had to leave us to keep us safe. It was hard to believe she’d joined our enemies and and fought against faeries she loved, but she had, and she had spun it in a way to keep her family safe, especially with my mother and her half-human family sitting vulnerable at the borders of Faerie with no way to protect ourselves. It hadn’t been enough to save my mother from her end, but I could see an ocean of regret washing across Evie’s eyes.
“A potion would be nice,” I said quietly. “Will it do anything to the babies?”
Evie smiled, her face looking younger. “No, it won’t affect them at all. You’ll feel much better. Trust me.”
I nodded and watched her as she turned to leave the room. “I’ll return with the potion. Thank you for letting me stay the night.” With that, she left me in the silence of my rooms, a place I’d retreated to far too often when my burdens had grown heavy.
I slid down into an overstuffed armchair which reminded me of my favorite recliner back home in Portland, where our Pyren was located. It was soft and cozy, and I curled up in it as I watched a flock of birds or pixies—I wasn’t sure which—float by.
I was going to be a mother. At barely nineteen, this was a huge undertaking. There were many to help with the job, but I was petrified nonetheless. It was just one more thing drilling into my mind as I closed my eyes, exhausted. I had to tell Dylan and Soap. How awkward was that going to be? I wasn’t sure, but it was on my list of weird things of stuff that has happened to me, a list growing far too long as of late.
I somehow drifted off and awoke later as Evie gently shook my shoulder and held out a heavy bottle filled with a deep, amethyst-colored liquid.
“Sorry, Shade. You were talking in your sleep about fire and ice and didn’t appear to be enjoying it. Here’s the potion for your nausea and exhaustion. Take one spoonful morning and evening.” She pressed it into my hand and ran her fingers through my hair as I yawned and sighed.
“Thank you, Evie.”
“You’re welcome.”
“What is the meaning of this?”
We both turned to find Nautilus at the entrance, his face maroon in fury. “How dare you order me to return to The Scren, Evangeline?”
He was pissed beyond belief, and I glanced at Evie to see that she had been expecting it. Before she could answer, I interrupted.
“I asked her to.”
Nautilus’s mouth hung open in surprise as he watched me place the bottle into my skirts and stand up. I knew I was looking ill and pale, but Nautilus was dear to my heart, and I had to convince him I’d wanted him back at the palace, even if it was just to save my aunt a little headache. It was the least I could do in exchange for the potion she’d brewed for me.
“How are you? I’ve missed your company.”
He remained speechless as I approached, but he let me slip my arms around him in a tight hug.
“I’m all right. I’ve missed you too.” He calmed immediately, an effect I had on some people around me. I felt his magic stir at my touch, and I sighed, suppressing the urge to siphon some off. I could steal others’ magic and use them at my own leisure, but I couldn’t do this to Nautilus. Not him.
“Thank you for watching over Anna in the Unseelie palace. I’m truly grateful of your special care for her.”
“Yes, of course, Shade. I’d do anything for you both. I thought your aunt had ordered me to return against your and your sister’s wishes.”
“I understand. She was just carrying out my orders.”
He nodded, straightening as I let him go. He kept a wary eye on Evie, and I doubted he believed that I would do such a thing as to order him away from my sister, but I had to let him think that for now. But what I didn’t anticipate was having him join my entourage again. Soap might be okay with it, but Dylan would be furious. Or maybe, with the news of my pregnancy, Dylan wouldn’t even notice Nautilus around. I hoped so. I’d had enough conflict to last a lifetime.
“You’re ill.” Nautilus reached out and pushed a strand of my hair behind my ear, a gentle gesture. My cheeks flushed at the intimacy of it, and I pulled away.
“Yes. I’m pregnant. Evie’s made me a potion to calm my nausea.”
Nautilus’s face shifted from confusion to joy in mere seconds.
“Congratulations! That’s great news!”
“Yes, it is. Though I’ve yet to tell Soap and Dylan, so please, keep it quiet.”
He grinned. “Of course. I wouldn’t want them upset at me knowing first. But I do want to ask you something, Shade.” He peered over my shoulder toward Evie, a scowl forming on his lips. “In private, if that’s okay.”
I turned toward my aunt, lifting an eyebrow to ask for her consent. She gave me a curt nod before leaving. I watched her click the door shut and glanced once more at Nautilus. His rich mocha skin was paler than usual since he’d been out of The Scren’s brilliant sun for months and had been holed up in The Withering Palace. It was always so gloomy out there; I hoped Anna wasn’t going crazy.
“What is it, Nautilus? Is my sister all right?”
“Yes, she’s fine. More than fine. She’s cast a spell over everyone in the palace. No one listens to Oran, but don’t dare try to tell Anna to do something she doesn’t want to do. I think the Sluagh are afraid of her.” He chuckled but cleared his throat as his face grew serious. “I wanted to ask you if there was any way to stop her marriage to Oran. I love her, you see. You of all people should know how much she means to me.”
I nodded, my lips pursing at his question. “I know you do. Trust me, I know. I just… I don’t think there’s anything I can do to break the
m up. She took my place, but who would take hers? There is nothing that can be done.”
Nautilus nodded, his frown deepening. “I know. I—I thought maybe there’d be some small chance.”
“Do you want to marry her as second husband?”
He shook his head. “Oran has already approached her and made her vow to not take a second husband. It’s already done. I cannot blame him. They are not Teleen, after all.”
“I’m sorry, Nautilus.”
He nodded, looking pensive as his eyes wandered to the windows displaying the calming night sky. I followed his gaze and sighed. So many thoughts ran through our heads. I knew he needed to digest the fact that he was no longer welcome at The Withering Palace and was no longer a contender for Anna’s hand, no matter how much she wanted him too.
“I’ll leave you be. Do call on me if you need anything. My old quarters are still available, I take it?”
I nodded. “Yes. I had them sealed. Feel free to occupy them again.”
He smiled and bowed then reached out to kiss my hand before spinning on his heels and heading out of my rooms.
My heart went out to him and to Dylan and Soap, who would hear my news very soon. I hoped it brought nothing but joy to them both and didn’t amplify any pain. With things the way they were, I was afraid for us all. The journey to The Heart of Fire and Ice would now be an even more trying ordeal given my condition, but I hoped, for my babies’ sakes, it wouldn’t cost me everything.
Chapter Twenty-One
Dylan
Sylphi backed up, still holding on to my hand as I reached for the knife for memory transfer. I pricked a finger and watched as she smiled at me, readying herself by sticking out her tongue to take a bead of blood. Her sweet smile reminded me of the times we had spent together before I met Shade. It hadn’t all been bad, for there were many times I had enjoyed this woman’s company. She was alive with vibrant energy and wickedly lovely in many ways. Some things about her reminded me of Shade, but there was no doubt that Shade was the only one for me now.
It was Shade I loved and always would. Sylphi, unfortunately could never win that part of me.
I wondered if Shade had made it back to The Scren Palace with Soap. The thought burned jealousy into my head, and I turned away from Sylphi. This woman, and my love, reminded me of everything about broken hearts and love and how much damage we could do to each other. Our hearts were fragile things, made to withstand an ocean of torment yet break easily with one wrongly placed word.
I dropped the bead of blood onto her tongue and began arranging the scrying mirrors on the table before us. With the blood in her system, my ancestral memories would project across the mirrors for Sylphi to sift through. Every memory about Gretel’s debates and coronation would play like a film as we sat across from each other. It was the easiest way for her to learn what to do in a debate. I only prayed she wouldn’t get anything else I didn’t want her to access. I didn’t want her to have that kind of ammunition against me.
Nothing about Shade should grace these mirrors. Nothing about my life outside of the political debates Gretel had been through centuries before would be included unless Sylphi figured out how to pry them out of my blood. I hoped she didn’t.
“Okay, ready.”
I motioned for Sylphi to sit beside me in front of the mirrors. I knew she was familiar with this magic, for Ilarial had scryed with all the Teleen at one point or another. Basically, all faeries grew up learning how to do this, and it was often helpful to listen to other people’s memories about life and to see the possibilities of the future.
“Okay, let’s get this over with,” Sylphi said. She peered out across the mirrors, watching the way my hand hovered over them. Their magic flickered, an odd occurrence for I’d never experienced any kind of interruption of magic. I recalled Soap and Benton mentioning it when they’d returned from a mission in the human world but had thought little of it. Now it took all my concentration to conjure up the spell and keep it formed.
I peered into the mirror and poured the memories into the mirror. All three of the mirrors shifted into scenes of Gretel’s debates and the opposing factions against her. Everything I could find of my father’s recall flashed by in mini-movies until even other things slipped out of my head and onto the mirrors. Sylphi stared, engrossed in all the images she was seeing.
I tried to pull away from the scrying but failed miserably. While the magic had flickered at first, now it was draining my head of memories and filling the mirrors. As I struggled to end the spell, I became horrified to see things between Shade and me appear on the silvery surfaces.
“No!” I shoved my magic into the mirrors, cracking each one as I managed to sever the spell, breaking its hold on the both of us.
I leaned back, inhaling deep, hungry breaths. I felt drained, my magic spent. I peered up at Sylphi, who had absorbed every debate and had experienced them as if she had been standing there watching them herself. She looked exhilarated. It was then that I realized she’d seen Shade and me in intimate moments and had watched it all as if she’d been in the bedroom with us.
Just perfect.
Not much time had passed. Time ran quickly within the mirrors, so it had not taken long at all for her to go through all the memories, study them, and soak them up as if they belonged to her. Her opponents would not have such a rich library of memory, for many of them had not been there when Queen Gretel received her crown. At that time, the debates had not been public, and only the members of the council and a few select others had been allowed full access to the procedures. My parents had been among those few.
Sylphi now had everything she needed; the rest would be up to her. Unfortunately, I’d also given her the ammunition she’d need to slice away at Shade if she ever wanted to. My heart sank.
A minute passed as Sylphi blinked her eyes, watering from staring so intently at the mirrors. She eventually looked up at me, smiling. “That was amazing.” She closed her eyes as her mind processed the memories one by one, archiving them and letting her learn from each of them. “All of it.”
Yeah, of course it was. My shame built inside me, aching to tear out my heart as I pondered how to repair this mess. I’d let the magic control me. Or had Sylphi manipulated it somehow? I’d never know. This sort of magic was a siphon that left the bearer drained and the receiver full of new memories.
I swallowed down my fear and hoped to divert her thoughts. “I hope you learned a lot from them for the debates. It’s really the best I can give you.”
She nodded, blinking her steel-colored eyes back at me. Was that malice I saw in them? No. It was more infatuation than anything else. She’d enjoyed the memories I’d leaked to her far too much.
“That was the best lesson I could’ve gotten from anyone. Thank you, Dylan. I appreciate it, really.”
I gave her a curt nod, smiling flatly and trying to not encourage her in any way. She knew I wouldn’t be interested in pursuing her anymore, but that wouldn’t stop her from trying, just to get under my skin.
“Well, I’d better get going,” she sighed happily, getting to her feet. “It’s been a long day. Tomorrow I want to map out exactly where I’ll be standing in the main hall and see who else is going to be in the debate. I have stiff competition, and I’ve heard several candidates are truly interested in the position. I’ll have my work cut out for me.”
I nodded, unfolding my arms as I watched her gather her bag and begin to walk toward the door. She suddenly turned back and reached out, placing her hand on my arm. “Wait.”
I knew I wouldn’t be able to get away so easily, and I almost let out a frustrated sigh. But there was fear there in her eyes, maybe even nervousness? This was interesting, for I’d never seen her nervous in her entire life.
“I really have to go too,” I said. “Regis, the captain of the guard, asked me to help him out today.” I peered down at her arm, hoping she’d get the message to let me go.
“I’m sorry, Dylan. I know you’re ma
rried to Shade now, and though I don’t like her very much, I must admit, seeing you again has stirred up some old feelings inside me. I know I’ve done so many foolish things which are probably unforgivable. I was cruel and malicious. But if only you knew what I’ve been through since then, you would know that I’m no longer that woman.”
I took a breath, wondering what she was up to. “I understand, Sylphi. I can see that you’re different, and I’m glad you are. You’re smart, intelligent, and I was always hopeful you’d stop wasting your talents on something as trivial as jealousy or gossip. I’m glad you’ve gotten past that.”
“Yes, I have. I’m so happy you can see that. But there’s also something else I need to ask you. I’m just not sure how you’re going to react.”
She finally let go of my arm and turned away to begin pacing the room as she bit her nails. Now, I couldn’t let her leave it open like that. I had to know what she needed to tell me. I just hoped I wasn’t making a grave mistake.
“All right, just spit it out, Sylphi. No sense in holding it all in.”
Sylphi nodded and chewed on her lip until she finally stopped midstride and looked back up at me. “I desperately want to be ruler, and I know I don’t have to be married to do so, but I know I squandered our time together. When I think about marrying anyone, you’re the only one I can see myself able to even tolerate enough to be married to. It kills me that I let our chance slip away. Would you please consider divorcing Shade to marry me if I become queen of the Teleen? I can’t do this without you.”
I sucked in another breath. She had spoken a thought I had pondered already. Divorcing Shade. Just thinking it felt like a spear through my heart making my breath hitch for a moment, though I shook it off quickly. I looked up and drilled my gaze into Sylphi.
“I—I’m not sure I can do that to Shade.”
“She’s marrying another. You will not be her only king.”
