“Fuck,” I bark, lifting my hands to my hair and pulling to the point I think it might start coming out.
What the fuck is wrong with me? Why can’t I just stay away from her? Leave her to do her own thing while I do mine? Why can’t I just leave her the fuck alone?
Rearranging myself in my pants, I quickly wash my hands, not being able to cope with the scent of her lingering on my fingers. The memory of her hot mouth sucking on them is torture enough.
“Where the fuck did you go?” Mason asks the second I join him, Jake, and the girls outside the diner.
“Just went to the bathroom.”
All four of them eye me suspiciously but wisely none of them say anything.
“Back to mine? There’s still some booze left from Saturday night.”
“It’s a Monday night,” Camila points out, looking a little shocked by the suggestion.
“Right, which means we’ve got the whole week still to get through before the game Friday.”
“Even more reason why you shouldn’t be drinking. We need you all sharp and focused if we’re going to make it past the first game.”
Rolling my eyes at her, I catch Jake’s. His hold the same seriousness that Camila’s do, but I already know he’s reading more into this than I want him to.
The truth is that I just don’t want to go home to an empty house right now. I can’t handle the fact that they’ll all head off home together to enjoy their evenings while I’m going to end up getting off- my-ass drunk just to escape reality.
“Yeah, let’s head to yours. Cam’s right, though. No alcohol and definitely no weed.”
“Spoil sport.”
17
Raelynn
“Jesus, Rae. You look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” Bill helpfully points out when I stumble into the kitchen a few minutes later.
What I really needed to do was lock myself in the ladies’ bathroom and take a breather, but I’d lost track of how long Ethan had me pinned in that dark room and I didn’t want anyone to think I was taking the piss on my first night.
“I’m good. I’m good.”
“Okay,” he says, but he doesn’t look convinced as he keeps his eyes on me for a few more moments.
“It’s starting to quiet down out there at least,” Cody says, joining us in the kitchen. Thankfully, he’s too busy dropping off plates to notice my appearance.
My heart is still trying to pound out of my chest, and my veins feel like they’re filled with lava from the way he was touching me. I’m not even going to start on the state of my panties, because he was right. I didn’t get myself off after he had me on the edge the other night and now, after he’s had another go, I’m fucking desperate for a release.
Thankfully, the rest of the night is much less eventful. We’ve had a steady stream of customers—some I’m sure are Rosewood students, but they’re all polite and most tip me really well, which helps toward Ethan’s unpaid check.
“Honestly, it’s fine,” Bill argues when I’m forced to explain why the register doesn’t add up at the end of the night.
“No, I always pay my way.”
“It’s not your way to pay though, is it? I’ll get it out of Ethan one way or another, don’t you worry about that.”
“But—”
“No buts. You’ve been great tonight, Rae. I think it’s the beginning of a beautiful thing. Now get the hell out of here and go and do some homework or something that’ll ensure you don’t spend the rest of your life waiting on others.”
“It’s done okay for you,” I say, now having experienced just how much he loves his place and his job.
“Maybe so, but I’ve seen the fire in you tonight. You’re destined for greatness, kid. Not a diner. Now scoot. Both of you.” Bill flicks a cloth in both mine and Cody’s direction and together we head to get our stuff and leave for the night.
“See, I told you things would get better,” he says as we walk toward the parking lot.
“I guess.”
“Are you going to have an even bigger fan club by tomorrow evening?” he asks lightly.
“Probably. No one here really likes or wants me here.”
“Hey, that’s not true. I’m starting to think you might be pretty awesome.”
“Oh yeah?”
He shrugs, a little color hitting his cheeks at his admission. “You need a ride home?”
“Uh… it’s okay. I was going to walk, clear my head.”
“It’s dark.”
“And?”
“Come on, I’ll give you a ride.” I go to argue, but he soon cuts me off. “It’s just a ride, Rae. I’m not offering up marriage.”
“I know, I’m just not used to anyone offering me anything.”
His mouth opens to respond, but he soon changes his mind and closes it again. Awkwardness crackles between us until he comes to a stop behind a red Ford and points toward the passenger side.
The journey home is nice enough. Cody chats about college and his life here while I try to avoid any conversation about how I came to find myself in Rosewood aside from what he already knows.
“It’s just up here,” I say, wanting the seat to swallow me up when the houses that line this street start to turn into mansions.
“Up here?” he asks, skeptically.
“Sadly. This one.” I point to the driveway, expecting him to pull up at the curb so he can make a quick escape, but instead he pulls right up in front of the house. The gravel beneath the tires crunches as we make our way up the ridiculously long track and come to a stop behind the cars here. My heart drops, that he’s home, but knowing he’s got company makes it that little bit better.
Risking a glance at Cody, I see his eyes widen as the house appears before him. “And you need a job at Aces why?”
“Don’t be fooled. None of this has anything to do with me. I’m just an unwanted guest right now.”
The car slows to a stop and the intensity of his stare hits the left side of my face as he turns to me.
“So how have you ended up here exactly?”
“My mom.” I let out a huge sigh. “She’s been seeing the man who owns this place. She moved us here out of the blue.”
Peering at Cody out of the corner of my eye, I’m pleased when I find no evidence that he already knows the story of what’s happening under this roof. After the way Bill seemed to know everything, I was worried the whole town was aware of Eric’s affair which saw his wife run out of town and for us to be shipped in.
“That’s tough. Nice digs though. Could have been a hell of a lot worse.”
“Oh don’t worry. She’s dragged me to hell and back before.” The words are out of my mouth before I have a chance to stop them.
I stare out the window at the giant brick build mansion and sigh. Movement in one of the downstairs windows catches my eye and my blood runs cold. Oh goodie, Ethan’s waiting for me.
I have no idea how long we sit there in silence, but eventually Cody breaks it. “If you need to sit out here all night then that’s fine. It would have been good if you’d have warned me though, could have got some food.” His voice is full of humor, but it doesn’t really hit his target.
“I’m so sorry,” I say sadly. “You must have better things to do tonight than sit here.”
I release the seatbelt and reach for the handle, but his soft voice stops any further movement. “If you need a friend, Rae. I’m here.”
“You don’t even know me.” I don’t mean to sound defensive, but no one’s ever offered to be my friend before. They usually run as fast as they can in the opposite direction.
“I get good vibes. And forgive me for saying it, but I get the impression that you’re kind of lonely.”
A lump of emotion crawls up my throat at his words. “I’m used to it.”
He stares at me for a beat, his mouth opening to say something but obviously deciding better of it. “Can I give you my number? Just in case you ever need a friendly voice.”
“S
ure.” I pull my shitty cell from my pocket, open my contacts and hand it over. Cody does a double take on it before tapping in his details and then ringing himself. “Thanks,” I mutter, taking it back. “I should probably go.”
I push the door open and stand before leaning back in. “Thank you. I… uh… really appreciate it.”
“Anytime. I’ll see you tomorrow night, yeah?”
“Can’t wait.” An almost genuine smile twitches at my lips before I shut his door and wave him off.
I stand at the front door for a long few minutes, still putting off going inside, but I know I can’t stay out here forever.
Eventually, I turn and push the heavy front door open. The sound of the TV and people chatting and laughing filters down to me as I make my way to the kitchen for a drink.
I’m standing behind the refrigerator door, about to pull out a bottle of water when a shadow falls over the floor beside me. My stomach twists, but fuck, if it’s not fear laced with a hefty amount of desire after our encounter earlier.
Blowing out a slow breath, I pull a bottle out and prepare to face him. Shutting the door, I keep my eyes on the floor, hoping he’ll allow me to escape unscathed. I know it’s wishful thinking.
I take a step toward the door, but he’s right there, blocking my exit. My skin prickles with his undivided attention on my body, but still I refuse to give him the satisfaction of looking at him. I’ve had my fill of him today. I just want to lock myself in a room and try to block out any memory of ever meeting him.
“Who is he?” His words shock me so much that my eyes fly up to his. I find his stare hard and piercing as he waits for his answer.
“Why the fuck do you care?”
He takes a step forward and I suck in a breath before he steals all the air from around me. It’s a huge mistake because his manly scent invades my senses as he gets in my personal space.
“Ethan, let the girl get a drink, will you? She’s been working all night,” a soft English voice says from behind him, but with his wide shoulders blocking my view, I don’t see her as she joins us.
Ethan’s teeth grind as he continues to stare down at me.
“Ethan, for fuck’s sake.” A delicate hand curls around his upper arm before she forces herself between us.
“Would you like to join us?” she asks me, looking back over her shoulder.
“No,” rumbles up Ethan’s throat at her offer.
“We’re just in Ethan’s den. You’re more than welcome.”
“No. No, she’s fucking not.”
“Down, boy.” She laughs at Ethan, but it does nothing for the raging inferno that’s blazing in his eyes.
“Whatever,” I mutter, taking a step back and finally able to breathe. “I’ve got better things to be doing than hanging out discussing high school gossip.”
I leave the room, but it’s not until I turn the corner to head up the stairs that I lose his attention.
“What the fuck is your problem?” she barks at him, and I can’t help but smile at her attempt. My steps falter so I can hear his response.
“I fucking hate her. She needs to get out of my fucking house and my fucking life.”
“Riiight. Ethan, I’m neither blind nor stupid, and you may recall that I’ve been in a very similar situation. I know exactly where your head is at right now, and I get it, I do. But—”
“But?” he barks. Most people would probably cower at his booming voice, but I get the feeling she doesn’t even flinch.
“But stop being such a fucking wanker. She’s new. It’s hard. And it certainly wasn’t her choice to be here, so give her a fucking break.”
“Whatever.” His footsteps get louder, and I run up the remaining stairs as fast as my legs will carry me. I don’t need him knowing that I was listening.
Closing my door behind me, I hope that he’s too busy with his friends for me to have to bother with dragging the dresser across, for now at least. I throw my purse down on the bed and start stripping out of my clothes for a shower. Ethan and his little pathetic posse aside, I enjoyed my shift tonight. It was awesome to be able to forget about the bullshit and chat to Cody and the other members of staff like I’m just a normal person. It was a bit of a novelty after the past few days of being treated like the scum of the earth.
I hang my head and allow the jets of water to thunder against my shoulders in the hope it’ll release some of the tension pulling them tight, but I get little relief.
I run a brush through my hair, remove my makeup, pull on a tank and shorts, and climb into bed surrounded by the homework I was given today, ready to make a start.
My future is the one thing I have control of right now, and I intend to do everything I can to ensure I can get the hell away from here at the first possible opportunity. If Mom wants to continue living this life, then she’s welcome to it. Ethan’s right about one thing: I don’t belong here. I knew that from the moment I stepped foot inside this house.
I’m just reading through one of the chapters I’ve been given when a knock on my door halts my movements.
I glance over, wishing I’d pulled the bloody dresser over before I crawled in here. My heart starts to race as I wait for what he’s going to do. The second he realizes he can walk straight in here, he’s going to, and Christ only knows what might happen once we’re alone again.
Memories of his fingers moving against me earlier slam into me and my core clenches. Fuck him for making it feel so good.
Another knock sounds out before a voice I wasn’t expecting calls my name.
“Rae, are you in there? It’s just us.”
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath, wondering how I’m going to get rid of them as fast as they appeared.
Climbing out of bed, I walk over to the door.
“Well if it isn’t Barbie and Sindy. What a nice surprise.”
The brunette bristles slightly, but the blonde doesn’t seem affected in the least.
“Hey. We wanted to come and make sure you were okay. Introduce ourselves properly.”
“No need.” I push the door to close it on them, but the Brit shoves her foot in the way. I arch a brow at her, hating that she’s so damn tall I almost have to break my neck to look at her.
“I know how hard it is starting over here. I was you only a few months ago. I know how it feels.”
“Trust me when I say, you have no idea what it’s like to be me.”
“I’m not talking about you, I’m talking about your current situation.”
“Ha, yeah, the Barbie doll who hangs off the football captain’s arm knows anything about what I’m dealing with right now.”
Something I must say ticks her off, because she steps toward me. Quickly followed by her friend. “By all means, judge away. Most people do. But I can assure you that what you’re thinking is wrong, and you and I have more in common than you’d like to admit.” She glances over my shoulder and her demeanor totally changes. It’s so fast that I almost get whiplash. “So, what are you working on?” She sidesteps me and marches straight into the room, followed by her friend.
“Uh…” I stare at them both as they walk over to my bed and sit down.
“I’ve been assigned this too. Boring as hell, right?” I stare at her in disbelief. “I’m Camila, in case you forgot. I’m sure you’ve had so many names thrown at you today that your head’s spinning.”
“Um…” My eyes flick between the two of them as I try to figure out what the fuck is going on.
“And she’s Amalie.”
“Right. I don’t know what it is you’re trying to achieve here, but I don’t do friends.”
“That’s good, because we’ve already got enough. Just thought you might want some company while the guys watch football replays downstairs. Come on, we can do this together, make it quicker.”
And that’s how I find myself sitting on my bed, surrounded by books and two girls that I’m fairly sure I’ll never connect with on any level aside from being stuck in this house w
ith someone they’re friends with.
I can’t deny that doing homework alongside someone else makes it a hell of a lot easier, and I hate to admit it, but slightly more enjoyable.
Both of them chat away while we work and give me some of the high school gossip that I really don’t give a shit about but listen to anyway.
They tell me about Ethan and their guys, and the sappy looks that cover both of their faces when they do makes me want to puke on the carpet. They both see it but also refrain from stopping.
By the time they leave, my homework is done and I fear I’ve had my first ever girls’ night in. It’s a weird as fuck feeling, especially as I curl down into my bed with my diary and relive the entire experience.
I have no idea if they go back downstairs to hang out with the guys, I don’t even hear Ethan come up, because by some fucking miracle I actually fall asleep before two AM and end up being woken by my alarm clock the next morning.
18
Ethan
Getting a lecture from Amalie was the last thing I needed after the day I’d had. The only thing I needed was to relieve some of the tension that was pulling at my body, and there was only one way I wanted to do that. I wanted her. I wanted her so fucking bad I could hardly think straight. The image of thrusting balls fucking deep inside that tight little pussy I’ve had the pleasure of dipping my fingers into was so fucking tempting. Hearing the little noises she makes when she’s getting close, hearing her demand that I stop, that I release her. Fuck. My balls were so fucking blue I was expecting them to shrivel up and fall off any moment.
I’ve no idea what the time is when the others leave. I’d lost focus a long time ago, even Jake’s chat about strategies for Friday night didn’t drag me back to the here and now. The only thing filling my mind was her. It fucking infuriated me.
Listening to Camila’s advice from earlier, I forgo grabbing the bottle of whiskey that taunts me from the side in the kitchen when I take the dirty glasses through and settle for a bottle of water instead. She’s right. I need a clear head for the game, even if it means my reality is clear as fucking day.
SAVAGE: A Dark High School Bully Romance (Rosewood High Book 3) Page 13
