by Coralee June
I rolled my eyes. He had no fucking clue what I was up against. If he even knew the half of it, he would be running the other way. But again, loneliness made me weak. I wanted to go with him. I wanted to keep feeling. I wanted to see Grace. “You don’t get it. If I don’t get back to my apartment soon, an entire army will be on our asses. You’ll be dead in an instant. I know too much, Alessandro. This is bigger than anything you’ve ever dealt with. They are probably already plotting how to get rid of me for this little field trip.”
He pressed his lips into a thin line. “That sounds like a bullshit excuse.”
I balled my hands into a fist and snarled. “You think I wanted to stay away for five years? You think I just went into hiding and worked for sick fuckers for kicks? They threatened anyone I ever cared about. They locked me up. The only reason I got out now was because I drugged my guard. They’re going to find me and punish me. They’re going to assign me some hacking job where I have to make trains collide, or they’re going to make me hack into a health database and find out what rich fuckers have sick children and offer a cure in exchange for ransom. ’Cause, oh yeah, these people have the cure to every disease imaginable and like to hoard it to themselves. I stumbled upon a lab they owned where they create new diseases.”
Alessandro’s brows raised in shock. “You know what else?” I continued, all the sins spilling from my mouth like vomit. “Maybe they’ll make me order a hit. Maybe they’ll make me steal a young college student’s entire savings. Or order a house to be burned down with the owners inside. I am a fucking puppet, and they are the Ringleaders. I do what they say or else.” Alessandro ran his hand through his hair. “I could kill myself. You know that’s something I’ve considered? But they’d just find someone else with only half a conscience and still punish the people I love. I fight where I can. I protect who I must. You have no fucking clue what you’re up against. This is an elite group that runs the world. Not even Gavriel Moretti could stop them. They’ll burn down entire countries for sport.”
I spat at the ground and threw my hands up. I knew I’d said too much, but there was no stopping the truth now. I was losing my fucking mind. Losing control. Losing myself to the whims of this evil organization I couldn’t escape. I paced. The anger buried in my chest came alive with Alessandro’s kiss. I wanted more from my life. I wanted freedom from these evil people. “Nix,” Alessandro growled. “Nix, listen to me.”
I didn’t stop my pacing for even a minute. I couldn’t. I had all this fury and nowhere to put it.
“Stop fucking losing your mind for one goddamn minute so we can talk!” he yelled at me before grabbing me for a big hug. I collapsed against him and cried against his chest. My pain felt like weakness. I was so fucking tired of not feeling in control of my own life. Alessandro patted my back as I let go of my agony and let it fall down my cheeks. “Let’s go to the hotel. We can figure out our next steps there. But you are not going back. Do you understand me?”
Anguish consumed my mind. He still didn’t get it. Maybe if I knocked him out and ran?
“Nix, stop thinking of ways to get away,” Alessandro begged.
“I’m thinking of ways to save you.”
“You saved me all those years ago,” he whispered. “It’s my turn now. Hell, you’ve spent your entire life saving people. Me. Sunshine. Grace. The Bullets. It’s time to relinquish a bit of control. It’s time to trust someone else to be strong. I know you’re scared. I know you think you’re doing what’s best, but it’s time to come home.”
He was right. I knew it. But hoping to escape the Ringleaders was dangerous. I wasn’t sure I could do it. But now that I’d seen Alessandro, I wasn’t sure if I was strong enough to run away again. We had to try.
“Okay,” I replied weakly. I hated how much these people had stolen from me. I used to be the levelheaded one. I used to be the one who pulled the strings. Not anymore.
Alessandro pressed his hand against my back and started leading me back down the windy streets of Sydney. I was sweating through my sweatshirt, and my entire body ached. I felt completely drained. “Just a little further,” Alessandro promised while guiding me. I stole glances at him, noting the ways he’d changed and how he was still the same. He was a protector. He was the level head to my eccentricities. He had a couple of wrinkles around his eyes, and his scruff didn’t look as sharp and trimmed as it used to. He wasn’t wearing a perfectly tailored suit, either.
But he was still the same. Still tall and proud. His olive skin looked beautiful in the Sydney sunshine, and I loved the way his muscular arm wrapped around me. I felt safe for the first time in ages.
He pulled me up to the Sofitel, and I stopped immediately. “You can’t stay here,” I whispered.
“Why not?”
“It’s owned by them,” I said while looking around.
“It’s owned by who?”
“The Ringleaders.”
Shit. This was a bad idea. I needed to end this and leave.
Alessandro let go of me to fast walk toward the entrance. I stared at his back for a moment in confusion, and once he realized I wasn’t behind him at the revolving door, he called over his shoulder. “Grace is inside.”
My heart panged. Grace.
I jogged after him and let out a shaky exhale. They'll know we were here. I wanted a long reunion with Alessandro and Grace, but there was no time for that. They’d find us soon, and I was ready to run.
Chapter Nine
Grace
I trembled as I stared at the clock. Two minutes. Alessandro had two minutes to show up before I was getting the fuck out of here.
Okay, maybe ten minutes. I couldn’t just leave him. What if he was dead? What if they were coming after me next? I pulled my wet red hair up into a bun and paced the hotel room. It was insane how quickly shit went south. One second Alessandro and I were shopping, the next I was sprinting down the street toward our hotel. The second I got in our room, I locked the door and shoved a nightstand in front of it. Then, I hopped in the shower and cleaned up as quickly as I could. After drying off, getting dressed, and packing everything into my suitcase, I waited.
And waited.
Then waited some more.
One minute. One minute until I was out of here.
The minute passed in the blink of an eye. I wished I had my cell phone to call Sunshine. I wished I wasn’t scared that it could be traced and put her in danger. I wished I didn’t feel so fucking alone. I didn’t want to run away in the first place. I could handle myself in a fight. Visions of Alessandro lying dead in the street made my stomach coil with anguish.
I waited a bit longer; each tick of the clock felt like a death sentence.
Then, the door handle moved. Whoever was on the other side pushed against the nightstand. I clutched my chest and prepared to fight my way out of there. “Grace?” Alessandro said cautiously. “If you’re still here, I’m going to be pissed. I said forty-five minutes.”
Never in my life had I been so relieved to hear his bossy voice. I let out a huff of air and shot off the bed. I shoved the nightstand away and flung open the door. Relief flooded me the moment I saw him. “Thank fuck you’re okay,” I choked out, tears stinging my eyes. Alessandro looked nervous as I checked him over for bruises. He appeared flushed and ruffled. There was a purple bruise blooming on his neck. “What happened…”
I realized what had happened the moment I saw him. Nix. Nix! He was standing behind Alessandro, holding onto his hand like it was a lifeline. He looked rattled but still the same. The thick-rimmed glasses he used to wear weren’t on his face. His lips were swollen and bruised. His eyes wild, feverish, and coal black. He looked haunted and horny. The sweatshirt he wore didn’t hide the way his chest heaved. I felt my excitement rise within me. It was like taking a breath of air after being held under water. My mouth parted in a gleeful smile. My skin felt ten pounds lighter. But then, that elation cracked, crumbled, and collapsed. Nix licked his lips while glancing at Alessandro, a
nd that simple longing look was all I needed to see. I knew. I just knew where I stood in this dynamic.
I’d planned for this, hadn’t I? I knew that there was a possibility that these feelings were one-sided. Alessandro looked like he just kissed the love of his life, and Nix looked like I was intruding on something precious. This wasn’t the reunion I wanted. But I refused to let them see me break.
“You’re alive,” I said calmly before backing up and walking back into the room. I wanted to hug him. Hit him. Beg for answers. I wanted to kiss his lips and strip him bare. But no. I wouldn’t allow myself to hurt.
“He was following us, and I caught him,” Alessandro said. His voice was pinched with a level of guilt that I didn’t want to pick up on.
“Well. We always knew you’d be the one to catch him, huh?” I gritted before turning my attention to Nix. “You look good. Where have you been? Why did you leave?”
“We really don’t have time for this, remember?” Nix said in a low voice to Alessandro. So they were already sharing little moments—little secrets. Fine.
“Right,” I whispered.
Alessandro walked up to me and cupped my chin with his hand. I didn’t want to be hurt or angry with him. If I were in his shoes, I would have done the exact same thing. But it still stung something deep. I was just a temporary fling to Nix. Something to pass the time before he left for god knows where. “I’m going to take a quick shower and get dressed. Then we have to leave. Our location is compromised.”
“Okay,” I replied while giving him a shaky smile. Above all else, it was important he knew that our friendship surpassed the pain I felt. I’d already officially lost the hope of having Nix. I couldn’t stand to lose Alessandro, too.
“I promise we will talk about all of this.”
I didn’t want to talk, but I nodded anyway.
The moment Alessandro slipped into the bathroom, Nix started checking the perimeter. I watched as he ran his fingers along every surface and checked under the bed. “Ah,” he said quickly. “Found a listening device. The Ringleaders collect blackmail like it’s trading cards.”
I had no idea what or who he was talking about, but it stung that he was still avoiding the elephant in the room. The term Ringleaders made me pause, though. It was the same word used by that crazy bitch that tried to blow us up.
“Are we going to talk at all?” I asked.
“Not right now. We don’t have time,” Nix said distractedly.
Hot tears stung my eyes. How could I be so stupid? I was hung up on a man who could care less if I was here. He seemed unaffected. Unmoved. While I was falling apart, he was just existing. I had built up what we had in my mind like the foolish girl I was. I clung to his memory. But not anymore.
“You owe me an apology. Give me that, and I’ll drop it indefinitely,” I said while crossing my arms over my chest.
“What?” Nix asked, his voice taking on a softer tone.
I averted my eyes for a brief moment, then shook my head. “What? What?!” I echoed. “I mean, apologize for making me love you, then just leaving. Apologize for coming back here and not giving two fucks that I’ve traveled across the world to find you.”
“I never asked to be found,” Nix murmured before sitting on the edge of the bed and crossing his legs.
“Right.”
I scratched at my neck where a scab was forming from the blast. His eyes zeroed in on the movement, and I watched him clench his fist. Fuck him. Fuck all of this. “So, no apologies?” I asked.
“Is that what’s going to make you move on?” Nix asked, a bit of anger to his tone.
No, I thought.
“Yes.”
“Then I apologize for fucking you and leaving. I’m sorry you thought it was more than what it was. I’m sorry you wasted all this time. I’m sorry you fell in love with me. I’m usually pretty clear about my expectations going into things, and I didn’t do that with you. I’m not going to give you an explanation, because I don’t have to. I’m not going to apologize for your feelings, because I never asked for them. I’m not going to do anything, because you mean nothing to me, Grace Moretti. The sooner you learn that, the better.”
His words. Fuck, his words. It was like a bullet to the heart. I wanted to scream and cry and throw myself at him. But no, I refused. I’d watched my mother lose her mind over men that promised her the world, then gave her fifty dollars for her services and some crack to dull the blow of rejection. I wouldn’t let him break me. I would just add him to the list of disappointments in my life and move on.
“Alright. Thank you for clearing that up.”
I heard the shower shut off in the bathroom, and Alessandro walked out in a towel. I’d seen Alessandro naked plenty of times. He was gorgeous. Chiseled. But instead of staring at the delicate droplets of water trailing down the grooves of his abs, I stared at Nix.
His reaction was truly the nail in the coffin. His eyes widened. He licked his lips. He hungered for Alessandro. His choice was clear. Their romance was far from over. Alessandro won.
“You okay?” Alessandro asked before dropping the towel and grabbing a pair of boxers from his pile of clothes.
“Yes,” Nix and I said at the same time. Oh. He wasn’t talking to me. I needed to get used to being second best again.
Alessandro turned to Nix as he put on a pair of athletic shorts. Nix’s Adam's apple bobbed. I couldn’t sit here any longer. Alessandro was staking his claim, and there was nothing I could do about it. I refused to fight for someone who didn’t want me back.
“Where are we going?” I asked.
“Melbourne,” Alessandro answered. “Then maybe New Zealand. We need to keep moving until we come up with a plan. And I know some friends in Melbourne that’ll let us stay with them so we won’t have to worry about this...organization owning the hotel we book.”
My mouth dropped open in shock. The people we were running from owned this hotel? “Okay,” I answered nonchalantly. “Let’s go.”
I was fucking exhausted. I needed to sleep. I didn’t care where we went as long as I could close my eyes for a bit and lick my wounds. I wanted to cry in private and possibly drink away my pain. “I’m not going with you,” Nix argued.
“Yes. You are,” Alessandro urged. I watched the two of them stare at one another for a lingering moment. It hurt to watch them trapped in their love for one another. Alessandro stalked over to Nix’s defeated form and grabbed his hands, forcing him to stand up. I couldn’t stop looking. I didn’t want to. I needed to see the evidence of their love if I had any hopes of moving on.
“We will figure this out. I refuse to let you go back to them.”
“And I refuse to put you at risk,” Nix snapped.
Ouch. The love between them was so heavy around me I could have choked on it. “And I refuse to sit here and get killed. Let’s go and stop wasting time,” I interrupted, making them both turn to look at me. It was like they’d forgotten I was in the room.
I grabbed our suitcase and fled for the door, hoping at least Alessandro would follow after me. Would he stop caring now? Would he stop feeling overprotective now that he knew Nix didn’t care about me? I stepped out into the hall and faced them for one last look just as the door was shutting. Alessandro was stroking his cheek. Nix looked longingly up at him.
My heart broke that moment. And I’d let the pieces stay shattered in my chest. I’d never give someone the power to break me again.
Chapter Ten
Alessandro
I kept looking in the rearview mirror at Grace. She hadn’t said a word during the ten-hour drive here. Not a peep. I tried to pull a sassy conversation out of her, but she didn’t bother to pick up on my nagging. She was a shell of a girl. She was everything I’d feared I would become when we found Nix.
Nix held my hand in the car, and I knew it was bothering her. I couldn’t help myself where he was involved, but I expected her to fight more for him. Hell, I wanted her to.
Shit. What was I
saying?
I was really conflicted, and seeing her vacant expression as she stared out the window made my chest ache. I was bouncing between being thrilled to have Nix with me and sad that somewhere along the trip, we lost Grace. “Who are your friends?” Nix asked. He kept eyeing the road with trepidation. He’d been conditioned to look over his shoulder these last few years, and I hated that he was so terrified. We needed to have a serious conversation about what all he’d told me, but we couldn’t do that until we were safe.
“After you left the vigilante group, an Australian named John joined. I’ve never actually met the guy, but we’ve been online friends for years. We both left it around the same time and kept in touch. I’m certain he will let us stay a couple of days.”
“You’re foolish to trust anyone in the vigilante group,” Nix growled. “They’re the ones that got me caught up in this mess.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean they sold me out. Told the Ringleaders about my hacking skills. If you’re taking us back to them, then I want out of the car right now. All of this is ridiculous. We’re never getting out of here.”
I hated that Nix had become so afraid of the world that he’d lost his optimism and lighthearted views. “We can trust John. You can trust me.” I squeezed his hand and turned to glance at him. “I promise.”
“How much longer?” Grace asked with a huff. She had her head turned and her forehead pressed against the glass window of our rental car. She was avoiding looking at us in the front seat.
“About twenty more minutes. You okay back there? Need more pain medicine for your injuries?” I asked. We were all delirious from lack of sleep, and I wasn’t even sure how she was functioning right now. I needed to rub some ointment onto her bruises and look at a few of her cuts to make sure they weren’t infected. When was the last time she ate? Had water? Fuck.
“Nope. I’m good.”
“Why does she need pain medicine?” Nix asked. His voice was accusatory. He might have tried to push Grace away, but it was blatantly obvious he still cared. I’d caught him stealing stealthy looks at her the entire trip here.
