Patricia realized that after Lily died, she made the decision to leave California too quickly. Our grief counselor told us to wait a year before we made any major decisions. She said the routine no longer seemed routine she felt like she was under attack. Nothing held value anymore. Her priorities, and commitments shifted. As did mine. Our anger just grew, and neither one of us did anything to help one another fix it. We both could have done something nice for each other. But I chose to drink instead, and ignore my wife’s needs.
After Lily’s death Patricia was numb, and our sexual relationship changed. She felt bad if she was enjoying herself, and I felt bad if I got any pleasure from sex. I needed the physical intimacy to connect with my wife. But it was so hard on me trying to figure out why Lily had killed herself. I could not understand Patricia after Lily had died. I was still reeling we both were. Patricia and I were grieving alone instead of together. We were both ignoring each other and I went further into the bottle. Patricia was focused on Gabe, and neither one of us was being proactive towards our marriage. My wife, son and I all have shared values of Lily and we all want to honor her memory in the same way.
One thing that we can all agree on is that we are all grateful to be alive. We are all grateful we had Lily in our lives even if it was only for a brief moment of time. We have a deep appreciation for the fragility of life. Patricia, and I both agree that we need to be grateful for the time we had with our daughter. We need to let the anger, and bitterness of losing her go. We cannot be angry for her not being with us anymore. There are ways to keep Lily alive through our memories, videos and in our hearts. I absolutely believe our marriage can survive. We will have to put in a ton of hard work, and it will not be easy.
Patricia is coming to visit with Gabe, and I am looking forward to seeing them. We all need to communicate, and be open, and honest with one another. Otherwise we will never survive this. I know now that it is okay to talk about Lily. When she committed suicide that was her decision. It was on her. I do not believe anyone could have talked her out of it. There was nothing courageous about her act. There was no glory behind her suicide. I know she wanted out of this life. I like to think that wherever she is she is happy and back to her old self.
Today I am picking my wife and son up from the airport. Before I do so I am going to clean the house, and do some grocery shopping. I plan on cooking them a nice meal. Patricia agreed to stay at our home while they are in town. She has not completely moved out of our home. A lot of their belongings are still at our house. She wants to move back in. We will have a long conversation, and include Gabe. It has not been fair for him to be shut out. I am so sorry for the way I treated them. I am ashamed of myself, and my behavior. I arrive at the grocery store grab what I need I check out and leave. I start to prepare dinner so all I have to do is throw it in the oven when my wife, and son come home. I leave for the airport to pick them up.
When I arrive Patricia, and Gabe are standing outside waiting for me. I guess their plane arrived early. I help load their bags into the trunk. We all get in my car, and head home. I ask them how they are doing? Gabe replies he is doing much better. Patricia says she is doing good.
The car ride is awkward no one is speaking. It seems like it is taking forever to get home. Nobody is breaking the silence. I ask Gabriel how school is going? He says it is good and he is getting A’s and B’s. I tell him that is great! I am proud of him. Have you made any friends Gabe?
“Yes, my best friend is Hank and I have a lot of other friends too.
How do you like your new school?
“I miss my school here; I miss all my friends here. I miss you Dad”
I miss you too buddy. We are almost home I prepared dinner I just have to throw it in the oven.
“What did you make Dad?” It is a surprise.
We are home! Dad I am going to put my suitcase up in my room.
“Okay Kiddo!” I will be right back.
Patricia I am going to preheat the oven and cook our dinner. Would you like a salad? “No, thank you. You seem healthy Patrick.” I am I have been running, staying busy, going to my meetings and making positive changes.
“That is great I am so proud of you I have really missed you.”
I have missed you too honey. I also got a cat.
“You got a cat?” Yup, I have named him Mr. Pickle Juice.
“That is a really stupid name.” Umm no it is not his original name was George. Now that was a stupid name. I adopted him from a shelter.
“Really? Are you serious? Where is the cat now?” Here, he comes Patricia.
“Oh, my goodness he is so cute. I am sorry you have a stupid name.”
Don’t hurt my cats’ feelings. “Whoops sorry!”
Mom and Dad, I am back! You got a cat? “Yes, Gabe his name is Mr. Pickle Juice.”
I love that name that is so cool and he is so cute. Can he sleep with me tonight? Come here Mr. Pickle Juice! I love you so much! See, Patricia our son likes his name.
“Well I still think it is a stupid name.”
Oh, Mom no it is not your just not very creative like Dad and myself.
“Gabe you are funny kid!” I know Mom.
Okay, guys I am putting dinner in the oven now it should take about 10 minutes.
“10 minutes? That is really fast.” It is cooking on broil Patricia.
“What are we having Dad?” I told you it is a surprise. Fine I will tell you I made spicy peanut chicken with broccolini.
“MMMM sounds good Dad.” “Yes, it does Patrick.”
Thank you to both of you.
Gabe will you set the table please?
“On it!” “Thank you!” “Welcome Dad!” Patricia sit down get comfortable. “Whoops I forgot the forks. I will be right back. Dad the timer is going off.”
I hear it, thank you Gabe. “Is it done? It smells really good.”
I am checking it now and it is done!
Gabe can you grab me the oven MITs please? “Yup.” Thank you, you got the silverware?
“Yes sir.” Let’s take this out to the table. Le diner est servi!
“Umm Dad what does that mean?” It is French it means dinner is served. “I think you mean voila dinner is served.”
“Patrick, where did you learn French?” From Sesame Street it is my favorite show I am also learning Spanish too!” “Are you kidding?” No, not at all Mr. Pickle Juice and I watch it all the time it is his favorite show too. “HAHAHAHA you are funny Dad.” Thank you I know!
“Patrick, this is delicious.” Gracias Senorita! “Good job Dad! I love it! It is yummy!” Merci beaucoup! “Okay, whatever that means Father!”
Gabe will you help me with the dishes and cleaning the table? “Okie Dokie you got it!” Thank you!
“What are we going to do tonight?” You, me and your Mom are all going to talk. I think it is about time. “Me too Dad!”
I want to apologize to both of you. I am sorry for treating you two so badly after Lily’s death. I am ashamed of my behavior I thought drinking was the answer. I haven’t had a drink in months. I did not acknowledge your pain, and that you both were grieving. I was being selfish, and I am sorry. I want us to be a family again, and I know we can with a lot of work from all of us. We all need to communicate, and acknowledge our grief. None of us will ever get over Lily’s death but it will get better. We can honor her and keep her alive through our memories.
“Dad I forgive you. I love you and I want to come home. I felt like I was being shut out and nobody wanted to listen to me.”
Gabe, Mom and I will listen now. I am sorry that you had to comfort us when we should have been comforting you. You can always be open and honest with us Gabe. You say whatever is on your mind, we will listen.
“I miss Lily, why did she kill herself?” Gabe, your sister was in so much pain she could not handle it. I guess she felt like she was doing the right thing. She was suffering. Lily committing suicide is on her, there is nothing we could have done. We tried our best, g
ot her into therapy and into support groups. “Mom and Dad, I forgive her, but it still hurts.” I know it does and it will for a long time. How you cope with your grief is up to you. Lily loved you so much. “She loved all of us!” Yes, son she did. “Do you think she is watching over us?” I sure do! I know that she is.
Gabe, Mom and I have decided that you both are going to live here again. “For real?” Yes, for real.
Patricia I am so sorry for ignoring you I love you so much. I have missed you, and I am sorry for not acknowledging your grief. I am sorry for the name calling, and me losing my temper. I am sorry for not communicating with you. I regret turning to alcohol, and not letting you or Gabe in. I am sorry I hurt you when you both needed me the most. We will do activities as a family and we will heal as a family. I promise no more drinking on my part.
Patrick, I forgive you and I love you. You are right we will survive this. I know it is going to be tough there will be bumps in the road. But if we all lean on each other our friends, and family we will get through this. I am so happy to be home. I miss Lily and you are right it was her decision we would not have been able to change her mind. I take comfort in knowing that she is at peace now. That gives me piece of mind. I know that she is safe now and she is no longer suffering. She was in so much pain. We did the best we could for her, neither one of us failed her. I love both of you so much.
Mom and Dad, can we cuddle on the couch and watch a movie or something? “Yes, sounds good to me.” Good because I am not tired and I am enjoying this family time. I miss playing board games and cards. Well maybe not cards Mom cheats.
“Hey no I don’t.” Uh, yes you do and you taught Lily how to cheat too! You also cheat at board games Patricia.
“Gabe and Patrick that is not true.” Dad I really like Mr. Pickle Juice he is sleeping with me tonight. Can we get a dog?
“I am not sure how Mr. Pickle Juice would react to a dog.” Please? “Well see I can have the adoption agency bring a few dogs over to see how the cat and dog react to each other.” “Cool!”
I am not making any promises. “Yup we are getting a dog.” If we do you need to walk him, clean up after him and feed him.
“Will I be paid for my services?” Ha! Very funny! “Mom will I be paid for my services?” That is up to your father. “Do I have to clean up dog shit?” Gabe watch your language. Patricia don’t laugh at him. I can’t help it that was funny to me.
“This is fun I am glad we are doing this.” We are too! Gabe you look like a young man now when did you get so tall? “Hmm I don’t know. I am almost 14 after all.”
Yes, I know you are growing up way too fast. “Let’s skip the movie Mr. Pickle Juice is tired he needs his beauty sleep and so do I.” Patricia he is way to funny.
“Do not hate me because I am beautiful.” Oh, wow talk about an ego, must come from your Mother. “Hey, we cannot help that we are so good looking.”
“You have no idea what a nuisance being this beautiful can be”
Believe me I know from experience it is tough being a hottie like me.
“Alright Dad lets deflate that ego just a little.” Ha ha! “For real Mr. Pickle Juice and I are going to bed I love you Mom and Dad.” Love you too Gabe! Love you buddy. “Goodnight.” Night!
Babe are you ready for bed? “Are you sure Patricia?” Yes, I want to sleep with my husband.
“Okay I am ready for bed.” Let’s go baby! “Alright!” Shall I put something sexy on? “No, babe you are already sexy enough.” I love you so much. I just want to please you tonight. Let me help you out of your clothes and I will rub you head to toe. “MMMM yes!”
Let’s get your shirt off, now your pants and boxers. I will start with your shoulders and work my way down. How does that feel?
“It feels great you are driving me crazy.” Turn over onto your back I want to kiss every inch of you. I love caressing your body I am so horny. I miss kissing you and you nibbling on my neck and breasts. “I miss it too.”
I want to go down on you and play with your balls just the way you like it.
“Oh my God that feels so good, please do not stop.” You like that? “Yes!” I think we should 69. “I agree!” Oh my God Patrick that feels so good! I do not want you to ever stop. Oh, Patrick Oh MY GOD! “Climb on top of me baby! I want you to ride me”.
” Oh my God this feels so fucking good. Go deeper and harder Patrick. “You like that my dirty girl.”
Yes Patrick. “Purr for me my little pussy cat.” Oh my God I am coming oh my fucking God. Patrick harder fuck me harder. “Babe get on your back.” Hurry up and get back inside of me. God you feel so good. “Are you going to come for me again?” Yes! Oh God YES! “God you feel so good you are so wet.” I am coming again. Don’t ever stop. “Baby I am about to cum. Oh my God.” Whew that was incredible. Stay inside me for a minute. Don’t move yet.
Do you want to go again? “Yes, I am ready!”
Oh, wow that feels nice. Make love to me slowly. In and out gently. “I love when you grind your hips and tighten your pussy.” God this feels so good. OH MY GOD PATRICK! Fuck me, FUCK ME HARDER, DEEPER. I WANT YOU TO COME.
Patrick come on my titties and I want to lick the rest off of you. “OH, BABY I AM ABOUT TO COME.” Come on my titties, I will clean you off. “Oh, that feels so good.” “I love when you suck my dick.” I love when you come on my titties. “Let me grab a towel.” I feel so much better that was fantastic. “Here babe I am wiping it off. Did I get it all?” Yes! “I love you so much.” “I love you too!”
Gabriel is knocking on the door. Yes Gabriel? “Knock it off you two Mr. Pickles and I do not want to hear your sexcapades.” Oh my God Patrick he heard us?
“Yes, I heard you. You were quite loud!” Gabriel go to bed. “Are you two finished and I am Googling 69?”
Gabriel go to bed. This is too funny I cannot stop laughing Patrick. “I know right?”
The following morning.
Good morning Mother and Father Mr. Pickle Juice and I want to have a conversation with you about last night. “Wait what?”
We found it deeply disturbing what you two kids were doing last night. And do not get me started on the 69 thing. I looked it up I know what it means. Not to mention all the dirty talk and what does God have to do with sex?
“GABRIEL!” Mother, no more sex you kept us up all night. “Actually, God has a lot to do with sex. “PATRICK” PATRICIA?
How are you two even awake? I never want to hear what I heard last night again. “Patrick, I don’t know what to say?” Neither do I Honey. “I am trying so hard not to laugh.” Me too Honey. “Is there anything else Gabe?”
Nope that about sums it up for Mr. Pickle Juice and I. I am going back to bed since I was kept up all night. I expect breakfast when I wake up for all the trouble you caused me. “Oh my God Gabriel you are to funny.”
Father, I am not being funny I am serious THIS IS NOT COMEDY PEOPLE. Why is Mom laughing? This is serious I am off to go back to sleep. See ya later. Also, no sex today I mean it you two.
“Patrick I can’t I cannot handle this I am going to pee myself.” That was too much is it possible to die from laughing so hard? “I don’t know babe.”
Mr. Pickle Juice was disturbed ha ha ha ha ha! “I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time!” Me too babe! “It feels good to laugh and smile.”
I have missed your big beautiful smile and your laugh. “Right back at you babe.” I love you always! “I love you more.” “What do you want to do today?” Well apparently, we have been banned from having sex. So, I guess that is out of the question. “Babe don’t make me laugh anymore I can’t take it.”
12
Meghan Thompson
Meghan’s life has not been easy. Meghan was born in Scottsdale Arizona on December 26, 2003. She was born addicted to drugs, and spent the first few months of her life in the NICU. Meghan’s first time in the world she was having withdrawals and in rehab. Meghan had vomiting, fevers, diarrhea, low birth weight and other th
ings going on. The doctors tried not to medicate Meghan too much. There were times that they had to place a feeding tube in to feed her. She was often times jittery. The doctor’s goals were to get Meghan interacting, eating and sleeping. Her mother was a prostitute and Meghan did not know her father. While Meghan was in the hospital her mother went to rehab, and got clean. Meghan’s’ Mother lost custody of her.
Meghan’s Mom regained custody of her and stayed clean for almost 4 years. Until one day she met this man named Mike. Meghan’s Mom Jodi was waitressing at the time when she met Mike. Mike moved in with them almost immediately. Mike was not a nice guy he beat on Jodi, he raped Jodi and got Jodi hooked on drugs again. He would allow his friends to gang rape Jodi. They would often times leave Meghan home alone when she was 4 years old. Sometimes they would leave Meghan with complete strangers.
Trafficking the Disappearance of Lily Rose Flannery: Based on Many True Stories Page 14
