Brylee walked out into the cold, blustery air and used the sting of the breeze as an excuse for the moisture that seeped from her eyes.
Chapter Sixteen
After she’d walked away from her mother at the dessert shop last week, Brylee had sat in her pickup for ten minutes and sobbed. She was just so tired. Tired of fighting with her mother. Tired of heartache and loss. Tired of wondering what might have been. Tired of life feeling like it was in limbo.
By the time she got home, she decided getting back to normal was long past overdue. Whether her mother liked it or not, Brylee was determined to make it happen. Since her father’s death, they’d barely decorated the house for Christmas or celebrated the holidays.
With the help of Birch and her grandfather, Brylee prepared a Thanksgiving feast. Her mother slept in then went to the office for a few hours, coming home just in time to eat. She complained that the potatoes were lumpy, but when Ace told her he’d mashed them, she returned to eating the meal without saying another word.
In an effort to make peace with her mother, Brylee asked Jenn if she wanted to hit the Black Friday sales the following morning. Jenn refused. “The office is quiet today. I’m going to catch up on paperwork and prepare some listings for next week.”
As soon as her mother left, Brylee packed up the few Thanksgiving decorations she’d set out. Birch and Ace sat at the kitchen table eating leftover pumpkin pie for breakfast. She grinned at them both and motioned toward the back door. “Get your boots on, boys, because we’re about to deck the halls at Blue Hills Ranch.”
Birch whooped and shoved the last two bites of pie in his mouth. He had on his boots, coat, and gloves, and was running outside to the storage shed before Ace had set down his coffee cup.
“I reckon I better keep an eye on him,” Ace said, finishing his pie and coffee before he bundled up and made his way out into the cold.
While Birch and Ace unearthed decorations that hadn’t seen the light of day in years, Brylee put away many of the knick-knacks and decorations currently in the house. When she finished, she moved furniture around in the living room so they could place the tree in front of the window.
She’d just gone back to the kitchen and picked up a dustrag when Birch and Ace opened the door and carried in a large wooden sign.
“Oh, you found Dad’s sign!” Snow blew in with them so she hurried to close the door against the flurries and the cold breeze. “Where was it?”
Ace stretched his back amid a chorus of creaks and groans and shook the snow off his hat. “In the loft over the garden shed. We found two boxes of lights and the Christmas tree ornaments there, too.”
Brylee gave him a concerned glance. “Please tell me you did not climb up the ladder, Grandpa.”
Ace grinned at her. “Okay, I won’t.” He pulled off his coat and gloves then sat down at the kitchen table with a weary grunt.
Brylee gave the old man a long look then turned to her brother. “Birch, can you carry in the rest of the boxes? I need Grandpa to help me wipe the dust off everything.”
“Can do.” The boy hurried back outside into the cold.
Brylee made a cup of steaming, fragrant tea for Ace and set it in front of him before handing him a dustrag.
While Birch carried in the decorations, Brylee dusted the wooden sign. Her dad had taken old barnwood and cut it in even lengths then sealed the wood so it wouldn’t be rough. He’d attached the pieces together to form a three by four foot sign then took it into town to someone who did custom painting. The woman painted horse heads, one on top of the other, so that it looked like a tree. She added a few stars and, at the top of the sign, “Merry Christmas” was painted in a decorative font. He’d given it as a gift to Jenn for their fifth Christmas together.
“Let’s hang it in the entry,” Birch said, picking up the heavy sign and following Brylee to where she’d already removed a painting across from the front door.
Brylee helped him heft it up to the hook then the two of them stepped back and studied it. Birch grinned and dropped an arm around her shoulders. “Things already look more like they should around here.”
“Agreed. I want to get this all done before Mom gets home. If it’s finished and all the boxes are put away, she won’t make us take it down.”
“Then put some hustle in it, sis,” Birch teased as he raced back to the kitchen. Two hours later, the three of them bundled up and drove into town. They went out to eat at Ace’s favorite restaurant for lunch, then made their way to the local tree farm. Brylee and Birch held up trees while Ace decided which one he liked best. Brylee made the final decision, selecting a fragrant fir tree. While the attendant made a fresh cut on the bottom and attached the stand they’d brought along, Brylee and Birch went into the gift shop and filled a basket with holly, two loaves of the special apple bread only available during the holiday season, and searched for a new ornament to hang on the tree.
“These remind me of Dad,” Birch said as they stared at a display of metal star ornaments. Brylee got an idea and tossed three dozen of them in her basket. Birch shrugged, grabbed a bag of beef sticks from the cooler across from the front counter, and waited while Brylee paid for their purchases.
Brylee shook her head as her brother began gnawing on one of the seasoned meat sticks the moment they stepped outside. “I swear both of your legs are hollow. Where does all that food go?”
Birch grinned. “I’m a growing boy. Remember?”
“How could I forget? You’ve grown an inch since school started. Aren’t you already six-foot?”
He nodded and bit off another piece of the beef stick. “Yep. The coach measured me last week. Another quarter inch and I’ll hit six-one.” Birch nudged her with his elbow. “Kind of makes up for you, doesn’t it, shorty?”
“Call me that again and I’ll send that photo of you dancing around wearing nothing but your cowboy boots to the school to place on the bulletin board.” Brylee watched her brother’s cocky grin fade, taking her threat seriously.
“Would you really do that? My entire existence at school would turn into a nightmare. Besides, I was only three.”
“Call me that again and see what happens.”
Birch smirked. “Sure, stretch. Whatever you say.”
Brylee playfully whacked him on the arm as they set the bags in the back of her pickup and drove around to where Ace waited with the tree lot attendant to load their tree. Once the tree was loaded, they drove home. Ace offered his opinions as Brylee and Birch carried the tree inside and set it on the plastic tablecloth Brylee had draped over the floor to keep the needles and any leaks from the tree stand from getting into the carpet.
“A little to the left,” Ace said, tossing his coat on the back of the couch and taking a seat. “No, you went too far.”
“It’s fine, Grandpa,” Birch said, quickly running out of patience.
“How about now, Grandpa?” Brylee asked as she gave the tree a slight turn with Birch’s help.
Ace sighed and settled back into the soft cushions of the couch. “Perfect! I’ll just rest a bit while you two put on the lights then I’ll help with the decorations.”
Brylee had already tested the lights to make sure they worked. It didn’t take long for her and Birch to string them on the tree.
Birch reached for a box of their old ornaments, but Brylee took it from him and looked from him to her grandfather. “I have an idea to decorate the tree and want both of you to weigh in. If you hate it, we’ll just put these on like normal.”
Ace grinned and Birch gave her a knuckle-bump after she shared her idea. Birch went out to the tack room to gather one of the items she needed while Brylee invaded the private domain of her mother’s bedroom. She found what she was searching for in a box in the back of the closet, right where she knew it would be.
Lovingly carrying the box to the front room, she set it on the coffee table. She and Birch sang along to the Christmas carols playing on her phone while Ace offered encouraging comments
as they twined the rope her dad had used when he team roped around the tree.
They hung the star ornaments she’d just purchased along with all the red ornaments they could find on the tree. Brylee tied strips of bandana fabric on the ends of random branches.
“How does it look, Grandpa?” she asked, stepping back and leaning against Birch when he draped his arm across her shoulders.
“I like it. Looks just like something your dad would love. He enjoyed all holidays, but none as much as Christmas.” Ace sniffled and took out a faded blue bandana. After honking his nose, he stuffed it back in his pocket.
“Come on, sis. Let’s put on the top,” Birch said, carrying over a small step stool they kept in the hall closet.
Brylee opened the box and took out her dad’s cowboy hat. The pale gray felt looked like an unpolished pearl. She breathed deeply as she lined it with a piece of plastic to keep from getting sap on it, savoring the faint hint of her father’s after-shave that clung to the hat.
She handed it to Birch and he reverently set it on top of the tree.
“That’s perfect,” Ace said, getting up from the couch and moving so he could stand with his arm around Brylee’s waist.
She kissed his cheek then leaned her head against him as he gave her a hug. “I can almost feel dad here with us.”
“Me, too,” Birch said, stepping off the stool and standing on the other side of Ace. “I’m glad Mom’s not here.”
“I hate to say it, but I’m grateful she went to work today,” Brylee admitted. “The house is so peaceful when she’s gone. I know she works too hard, Grandpa, and we don’t need a lecture about her being our mother. We love her, it’s just she’s been so hard to love. The negativity and bitterness is just hard to deal with everyday. I don’t know how you both put up with it when I was gone.”
A sob at the doorway made them spin around in surprise. With the music playing and the three of them so focused on the tree, they hadn’t heard Jenn come in.
“Mom, we’re…” Brylee watched as her mother turned and opened the door, hurrying out to the carport. “Mom! Come back!”
Jenn whipped her car around and raced down the driveway. Brylee thought about chasing after her, but she had no idea what to say. Quietly, Brylee shut the door and returned to the living room.
Ace plopped down on the couch and scrubbed a hand over his face. “Maybe it’s good your mom heard what you said. She’s been carrying around burdens that she just needs to let go.”
Brylee nodded, hoping one of her dad’s nuggets of wisdom would pop into her head, but his voice remained oddly silent.
It was late when Brylee got a text from her mother.
Need some time to think. Going to the cabin. Be back Monday night.
Brylee sighed and tossed the phone on the coffee table. She and Birch sat on the couch while Ace rested in his recliner, pretending to watch a holiday movie with them although he alternated between reading a ranching magazine and snoring.
Birch gave her a questioning look. “Was that Mom? Is she okay?”
“Yeah, she’s fine. She said she’s going to the cabin and will come home next week.”
Birch nodded. “I don’t know what to say to her besides I’m sorry. She didn’t answer the text I sent.”
“I know, sweetie.” Brylee brushed her fingers through Birch’s hair like she’d done every since he was little. He shifted so his head rested on her lap and she placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.
“Mom needs to work some things out on her own,” she said, hoping to reassure her brother. “I’m glad she’s taking some time for herself.”
“Me, too. I just hope she’ll be safe.”
Brylee tried not to think about her mother driving an hour on treacherous roads up to the cabin located in the northeastern Oregon section of the Blue Mountains. The closest community was Weston. It was a twenty minute drive from there to the remote road that ended at the cabin constructed by Jenn’s grandparents back in the 1930s. Indoor plumbing and electricity had been added to it and the cabin had been renovated twice since then. The last time was not long before her grandparents had both passed away. They’d left the cabin to Jenn, but she hadn’t been there since before Brylee’s father passed away.
Brylee and Birch went there once in a while just for a place to get away. In fact, they’d gone with Ace back in October when she got home from Texas. They spent a wonderful weekend fishing and relaxing, laughing about fun times they’d had there before life had changed so drastically.
Jenn didn’t come home Monday as she promised, but Brylee knew she was at work. One of the other realtors had asked Dot to call her about staging a house for him. She’d asked Dot if her mother had a busy schedule that day and the woman confirmed she was booked.
Brylee didn’t want to worry Birch, so she kept her thoughts to herself on where her mother was staying. She might have gotten a hotel room, or decided to stay with a friend. She wondered if her mother intended to hide until Brylee left for the finals in a few days.
The night before she was ready to leave to drive to Las Vegas, Brylee had just sat down to dinner with Ace and Birch when her mother walked in and glanced around.
“That smells good. You have enough for one more?” Jenn hung her coat by the door and left her purse and briefcase on the floor.
“Sure, Mom,” Brylee said, giving the woman a welcoming smile before she hopped up and got a plate for her mother.
“Everything okay?” Ace asked, placing his gnarled hand on Jenn’s back and giving her a gentle pat when she sat beside him.
“I think so,” she said, then turned her attention to filling her plate.
The tension and quiet that had descended over them made Brylee want to run out to the barn and hide there until her mother went to bed. Instead, she turned to Birch and asked him how he’d done on his math quiz.
“Aced it, as usual,” he said, leaning back with a cocky grin. “Since I’m getting all A’s and I’m done with football for the season, I think I should go with Brylee to Las Vegas. I’ve never gotten to see the rodeo in person and she might need some help.”
“Birch, you can’t miss that much school,” Brylee said, giving him a motherly frown. “You’d be bored to tears after the third day.”
“I promise I’d get my assignments and do them while I’m there and I wouldn’t get into any trouble. Honest, Brylee. Please, please, let me go.”
She shook her head. “No, Birch, not this time.”
“This time?” Jenn asked, raising her head from the food she’d eaten in silence to stare at Brylee. “You plan on there being a next time?”
“Maybe, Mom. I don’t understand why you are so dead-set against me doing something I love so much and I’m good at. I’d like your blessing to compete again next year. I know I promised it would be one year, and I’ll keep that if you truly need me to stay here on the ranch, but I’d really like the opportunity to see what I can do when I’m not desperate to win because of our financial situation.”
“Mom, you have to let…” Birch’s pleas tapered off as Brylee gave him an admonishing scowl and shook her head.
Jenn wiped her mouth on her napkin and looked around the table. “Ace, you’re the only one who hasn’t voiced an opinion. What do you think?”
The old man cleared his throat and leaned back in his chair, as though he needed a moment to gather his thoughts. “I think it’s time you let go of your unreasonable need to control Brylee’s life and let her do what she’s meant to do with whomever she chooses to walk beside her.” Ace gave her a pointed look. “You’ve had a hard time of it, Jenn. No one is denying that, but Brylee’s had her own difficulties to overcome. Fighting you to chase her dreams shouldn’t be one of them.”
Tears rolled down Jenn’s cheeks. “I know. It’s just after all we’ve lost, I want to keep my babies close and keep them safe. I can’t lose any of you.” Jenn took a ragged breath. “I’m sorry I’ve been so… horrible to live with. I’ll try to do be
tter. Running away last week didn’t help. If anything it made it even harder for me to sort out my thoughts. Roger mentioned this afternoon that Brylee had staged a house for him the other day and it just made me realize my stubbornness is costing me the thing I’m most afraid of losing — all of you.”
“Mom, it’s okay.” Brylee hurried around the table and gave her mother a hug then Birch engulfed them both with his long, gangly arms.
Ace dabbed at his face with his napkin and cleared his throat again. “Darn tree is stirring up my allergies.”
Brylee grinned then leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Sure it is, Grandpa.”
Jenn gave Birch one more hug then patted his chair next to her, indicating she wanted him to sit back down.
“Son, I know how much you want to go with your sister, but she’s right. You need to stay in school. However, I did buy a ticket for you to fly down on the Thursday before the rodeo ends. If Brylee isn’t opposed to it, you can drive home with her.”
“Really, Mom? You’re not teasing me?” Birch asked, his face alight with excitement. He jumped up and hugged his mother then looked at his sister. “Will you let me ride with you?”
Brylee grinned. “Of course, you dork. You know I hate driving long distances by myself. It’ll be fun.”
“Will Shaun be with us?” Birch asked without thinking. He tossed a worried glance at his mother, concerned about mentioning someone who always drew out her ire.
“No, Birch, he won’t be, but you will see him there.” Brylee glanced at her mother. “Shaun and I are just friends, Mom. That’s it.”
“Someone very wise told me the other day it’s not any of my business what he is to you, and it isn’t. My personal feelings are just that — mine. I’ll do a better job of not being so vocal in expressing them going forward.”
Racing Christmas Page 18
