“Do you even know where that gun is?” Eliot challenged. “You couldn’t remember when we were moving.”
Jake’s eyebrows twitched upward. “You forgot where you put the gun?”
“No.” I totally forgot I even owned that gun until Eliot asked about it in the middle of moving. There was no way I would own up to that, though. “I knew where it was the whole time.”
“Where was it?” Eliot asked.
“My Aragorn cookie jar.”
“Not to be confused with the Darth Vader cookie jar or the Han Solo stein big enough to hold a full package of cookies,” Eliot muttered.
“I have a system,” I shot back.
“Just out of curiosity, why wouldn’t you put it in the Han Solo stein?” Lauren asked, catching me off guard. “He was the only one of that trio who used a gun.”
“Yes, but I figured that was too obvious in case someone broke in,” I replied. “Aragorn was the more measured fighter, so he made the most sense.”
“I’m dying to hear how this works in your head,” Jake drawled.
“It’s easy.” I fixed him with an even stare. “Darth Vader is evil, so you wouldn’t trust him with a gun. Sure, he tries to make up for all the bad stuff he’s done at the end, but he was still evil and had impulse control problems. You don’t want him watching the gun.”
“Even if it’s a ceramic him,” Eliot offered helpfully, forcing me to ignore him.
“Han Solo is obviously my favorite. He’s aces with a blaster, but he’s also hotheaded and tends to fly off the handle,” I continued. “Anyone who knows me recognizes he’s my favorite, so it seemed too obvious for a hiding place.”
“So, that leaves Aragorn,” Lauren mused, clearly intrigued by the game. “That makes a lot of sense.”
“He was a leader for the ages,” I agreed.
“Is it any wonder I love you?” Eliot teased as he draped an arm around my shoulders and chuckled. “The fact that you gave it that much thought is ... baffling.”
I sagely tapped my temple. “No one will find it there.”
“They definitely won’t,” Eliot agreed. “Mostly because I took that gun out of the cookie jar and put it in the gun case.”
I was outraged. At least, well, kind of outraged. “You stole my gun?”
“You haven’t touched that gun since I showed you how to use it,” Eliot pointed out. “And, say what you want, I know that you had no idea where that gun was when we moved.”
“You know that for a fact?”
“You told me.”
That sounded nothing like me. “I think you’re making that up.”
“And I think you’re trying to save face,” Eliot said. “As for the gun, if you need it, it’s in the gun safe. You know the combination.”
I didn’t believe that was true, but it was hardly important given our current predicament. In fact, it was probably best that I not know how to get into the gun safe while Eliot’s mother was staying with us. “Good to know.”
“Yes, this is a fascinating conversation,” Maggie agreed. “But back to my original line of questioning. Do none of you find this little arrangement weird? I mean ... Jake is Avery’s ex-boyfriend and Eliot’s friend. You’ve both ... shared ... the same woman. Eliot was never great at sharing when he was a kid, so I can’t figure out how he manages to do it as an adult.”
“He’s much better at it now,” I offered. “He doesn’t even put up a fight when I try to eat the entire bag of dill pickle chips by myself.”
“That’s because those things are disgusting,” Eliot offered. “You smell like rancid brine when you’re done eating them.”
“I think you’re exaggerating.”
“And I think you keep avoiding the obvious question.” Maggie stared us down. “Is no one uncomfortable with this arrangement?”
Lauren cautiously raised her hand, causing my stomach to twist. I selected her as a girlfriend for Jake because she didn’t seem the jealous sort. His previous girlfriend was crazy jealous, to the point she essentially started stalking us. Not only did I like Lauren personally, I thought she was even-tempered enough to make an odd quadrangle comfortable for all parties concerned. Apparently I was wrong.
“I thought you said you were fine with my past with Avery?” Jake asked, his tone edgy.
“I am fine with that,” Lauren said hurriedly. “I’m uncomfortable with Mrs. Kane attempting to implode Eliot’s relationship with Avery by trying to put a wedge between all three of you.”
I was dumbfounded by her response. Apparently, so was Maggie.
“Excuse me?” Maggie was ballsy enough to sound offended. I was impressed with the effort. “I’m doing nothing of the sort.”
“I minored in psychology,” Lauren countered smoothly. “I thought about making it my major, but I enjoyed public policy so much I switched gears junior year. I understand a bit about the human brain.”
“Oh, that’s awesome.” Eliot perked up. “Can you explain why Avery insists on working even though she’s on vacation? I can’t wrap my head around it.”
Lauren nodded without hesitation. “She has FOMO.”
“Did she just explain something?” Eliot asked, inclining his head toward Jake.
“FOMO,” Lauren repeated. “It’s shorthand for fear of missing out. It’s a real thing. Avery is afraid someone else will stumble across a big story, and because she takes great pride in doing her job, she’s naturally terrified her worst fears will come true.”
“My worst fear is that I’ll somehow end up stranded in the ocean with the Jaws shark circling,” I argued.
“I think that’s unlikely.” Lauren’s smile was kind. “It’s conceivable that someone will break a big story while you’re out of the office. You like being the center of attention in both your professional and personal lives, so it’s only natural that you can’t let go of what you see as a story with great potential.”
“That’s why she’s fixated on the mobsters,” Eliot mused.
“I’m not fixated on mobsters,” I barked.
Eliot pretended he didn’t hear me. “That makes a lot of sense. You’re good.”
Lauren beamed at him. “Thank you.”
“I think it’s nonsense,” Maggie snapped, causing me to cringe because my initial reaction was to agree with her. We’d finally found something we agreed upon and I wasn’t at all happy about the source.
“You don’t have to believe me,” Lauren supplied reasonably. “In fact, given your personality type, it’s normal for you not to believe me.”
Maggie was on edge. “And what personality type is that?”
“You’re Type A, with a penchant for manipulation and melodrama,” Lauren replied easily. “I believe something else is going on and you’re trying to take advantage of this situation to bring Eliot around to your way of thinking.”
“She wants Eliot to move back home with her,” I said.
“No way.” Jake was firm as he shook his head. “Eliot needs to stay here. He’s the only one in the county who can handle Avery. She’s much mellower than she was even a year ago, which is terrifying because she’s still a nightmare when she wants to be.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” I sniffed.
“You would.” Jake made a wry face. “Eliot can’t leave, though.”
“I’m not leaving.” Eliot waved off the suggestion with a hand flip. “I’ve told my mother that. She doesn’t seem to believe me.”
“I have not brought up that awful subject since last night,” Maggie complained.
“You brought it up twice at the mall,” Eliot shot back. “And again now.”
“Not really,” Maggie pressed. “I’m simply pointing out that Avery and Jake seem close. That might be uncomfortable for you down the line if they decide to get together.”
“Oh, that won’t happen,” Jake said at the same time I snorted. “Avery is one of the few people in this world who I know will always be in my life. Our relationship isn’t the
same as it was when we were kids. We don’t ... gel ... that way any longer.”
“You say that now but might change your mind down the road,” Maggie persisted.
“We really won’t,” I promised.
“Definitely not,” Jake agreed. “Besides, Avery loves Eliot. It was weird for me to acknowledge it even though I saw their relationship growing from the start. They fit together. Eliot has more patience than a normal man. He can take all the weird stuff Avery does and not complain about it. Heck, he told me just the other day that he finds it adorable when she purposely tries to irritate the world … and often succeeds. If you ask me, that means they belong together.”
I cast Eliot a sidelong look. “Did you really say that?”
Eliot nodded. “Yes. I didn’t expect Jake to repeat it, but I said it.”
“That’s kind of sweet.”
“It’s kind of embarrassing,” Eliot countered, rubbing the back of his neck. “It doesn’t matter. What’s done is done. As for you, Mother, I’ll put up with only so much before I crack. I warned you about that when you tried to set me up with the woman giving away bourbon chicken samples at the food court.”
I snapped my head toward Maggie. “What?”
“Don’t worry. I barely looked at her twice and only ate two pieces of chicken.” Eliot snickered as I scowled. “Is it wrong that I get a little thrill whenever you get jealous?”
“Definitely,” Jake said. “As for the other stuff, we hashed this out a long time ago. Eliot and I are friends. Avery and I are friends with the occasional migraine attached for good measure. Everyone is happy with how things turned out.”
Maggie obviously wasn’t happy with his answer, but she was in no position to put up an argument. “Well, I guess you know best.”
Eliot looked amused as he met my gaze. “It’s a Coney Island miracle.”
I couldn’t help but agree as I flicked my eyes to Lauren. “So, do you want to meet my mother and psychoanalyze her?”
Lauren’s smile was pleasant. “Sure. I’ve heard your family is one big psych experiment. I’d love to meet them.”
“I’ll arrange it.”
JAKE TOOK A MOMENT to pull me away from everyone else while Eliot paid the bill and waited for his mother to visit the restroom. His expression was sober when he met my gaze.
“I didn’t do anything,” I protested automatically.
Jake feigned patience. “Did I say you did something?”
“No, but you have your ‘I’m about to be a pain in your butt’ face in place.”
“I have no such face.”
“Do you really want to argue about that when Maggie will be back to give us grief any second?”
Jake tilted his head to the side, considering. “Good point. I actually pulled you aside for a reason.”
“I figured.”
“I want you to stay away from the mobsters you’ve been chasing.”
Whatever I expected him to say, that wasn’t it. “What makes you think I’ve been chasing mobsters?”
“Because I know you,” Jake replied, unruffled when I started to protest. “Don’t. We have very little time to deal with this. I know you’ve been digging — and probably hard. You were spotted on the other side of Mount Clemens with Andre Melvin earlier this afternoon. I want you to promise me you’ll let it go.”
I was too busy running the name “Andre Melvin” through my head to completely listen to what Jake was saying. “Is that his last name? He would never tell me. He always said he had one name ... like Cher. I’m so going to tease him about this.”
“No, you’re going to stay away from him,” Jake ordered.
That wasn’t likely. Andre had turned into one heck of a source the past few months and there was no way I was going to simply forget that. “Fine. I won’t see him.” Of course, arguing with Jake in the middle of a restaurant was a waste of time. I had other things to deal with. “Is that all?”
“No.” Jake shook his head. “I know Eliot is giving you grief about going after the mob — he thinks it’s funny because he doesn’t think you’re really on to something — but it’s not funny.”
Hmm. That meant I really was on to something. Jake wouldn’t warn me away unless there was a chance I would muck up an ongoing investigation. “I haven’t been digging all that deep,” I said after a beat. “With Maggie here, I don’t have time to attack this story like I normally would. You don’t need to worry.”
“Oh, I’m worried,” Jake groused. “I know you. Now that you think there’s more here you’ll find a way to dig until you either find answers or China.”
“I would never dig that long,” I said dryly. “I hate manual labor.”
“Don’t be cute.” Jake extended a warning finger. “You need to let this go no matter how much it hurts. This isn’t the story for you.”
Was he kidding? That only made me want to abandon my vacation and start chasing mobsters. “I’m on vacation,” I reminded him. “I couldn’t dig even if I wanted to.”
“Yeah, well, you’d better remember what you just said, because if I catch you playing in this particular sandbox I’ll tell Eliot that you were hanging out with Andre this afternoon,” Jake warned. “I know for a fact that he asked you not to spend time with that guy.”
“How do you know that?”
“How do you think?”
Wow! He and Eliot were getting even chummier than I’d realized. “I’m not going to keep chasing this,” I lied, making my mind up on the spot. There was no way I could give up this story now. There was definitely something to it. Not only that, there was definitely a chance that I was the only one who realized there was a story here. That would make it all the sweeter when I broke it. “I’m on vacation. I promise. You have my word.”
Jake relaxed, though only marginally. “Good. I was looking forward to a quiet week with you on vacation. I would like to make sure I actually get it for a change.”
“No worries. I’m backing off.”
“That will be a nice change of pace.”
16 Sixteen
We’d driven separately so I wasn’t surprised to find Eliot pacing in front of the house when I arrived. His mother was nowhere in sight — which I considered a good thing — and decided to cut off whatever argument he was about to launch with a perfectly tailored distraction.
“So, how fun is Lauren?” I kept my documents clutched flat against my chest and bobbed my head to show Eliot my enthusiasm. “Didn’t you love how she psychoanalyzed your mother and got us off the hook?”
Eliot stopped pacing long enough to look me up and down. His expression was hard to read, which was unusual for me these days. Somehow — and I still wasn’t altogether certain exactly how and when it had happened — I’d become capable of reading Eliot almost as well as I read myself.
As a borderline narcissist, I didn’t know what to make of it.
“Is that what you really want to talk about?” Eliot finally asked.
I shrugged, noncommittal. “That depends on what you want to talk about. If you’re going to focus on something annoying I’d much rather talk about Lauren.”
Eliot’s expression was dubious. “I’m going to give you a hint, okay? I don’t want to talk about Lauren.”
I blinked several times as I steeled myself for a turn in the conversation that I was positive I would dislike.
“Fine.” I exhaled heavily enough that my bangs fluttered. “I think Lauren is going to be a gem. She’s a welcome addition to our lives. I’m dying to introduce her to my mother.”
“You would be excited about that,” Eliot muttered, his hair standing on end thanks to constant hand rakes. “I want to talk about us.”
Something about the way he said it made the hair on the back of my neck stand on end. “Wait ... if you’re about to tell me that you’re ending this so you can take off and head out of state with your mother, I should warn you that I don’t take rejection very well.”
“Is that what you think I�
��m going to tell you?”
“No. I think you’re going to squawk at me for abandoning you to your mother’s whims all afternoon. Before you even start on that, I want to remind you that she’s your mother and you have to occasionally deal with her because that’s how the world works. I have to deal with my mother. Nobody likes it, but it is necessary.”
Eliot’s face remained impassive except for a faint twitch of his lips. “I see.”
“I’m sorry if that upsets you, but I’ve got a heightened sense of survival,” I continued. “I also think you’re irritated because you think I’m working even though I’m on vacation. I maintain that’s not true.”
“Oh, really?” Eliot folded his arms over his chest, his expression promising this conversation wouldn’t end soon, no matter how much I whined. “How is that not true?”
“I’m merely putting together a puzzle. I’m not writing stories and filing them. I’m not giving this investigation my full attention. I’m trying to put the pieces together. Some people consider jigsaw puzzles hobbies.”
“Uh-huh.”
“That’s not the only thing you’re angry about. You’re also agitated because of what went down with Tad this afternoon,” I offered. I’d gone this far, so there was no point in trying to find an escape hatch. “You’re stuck between wanting to hunt him down and kill him or backing off because it’s what I asked you to do and you don’t want to seem overbearing. Because you fancy yourself a good boyfriend — and you really are — you find the urge to hurt Tad overwhelming. You’re considering taking off to hunt him down despite the fact that you’d risk a war doing it.”
Amused, Eliot’s lips quirked as he shook his head. “I see. Is that what you really think I want to talk to you about?”
I nodded without hesitation. “Yes. You can’t stop yourself from being worried because that’s who you are.”
Eliot heaved out a sigh. “I hate it that you’re occasionally good at figuring out emotions,” he lamented. “Most of the time you’re too caught up in yourself to focus on others, but every once in a while you take me by surprise.”
“That’s by design.”
On Deadline & Under Fire Page 15
