by S. K Munt
Finn sighed. She had known about Mr Janks’s stroke because she’d actually been at Georgia’s house when it had happened...but she hadn’t realised that Georgia’s mother had left him soon after that, which must have been unpleasant for everyone involved. It also meant that they’d probably busted up during the eighth grade too which was when Georgia had first turned on her.
Could that be why she’s been acting out since then? Finn thought, noting that Liam was eyeing Finn carefully, like she was...well... an enigma. That, or a grenade with the pin pulled. Was it just grief all along?
‘I don’t buy it,’ Mischa grumbled, ‘but it’s not my party so…’
‘You can’t just kick her out guys,’ Gemma protested, albeit weakly. ‘She’s thrashed, so if she tries to go down that ladder she’ll probably break her neck,’ she nodded at Liam, ‘as will the more expensive and stoned one.’
‘Yeah so just let ’em sit down for a while til they clear up, kay?’ Aaron demanded gruffly, indicating to the far edge of the water tower. His tone made it clear that it was an order, not a request, which made Finn bristle. ‘I know you’re new to like, hanging out with people, but if you throw people that actually do have friends out, then you’ll have no one to blame but yourself if no one comes to your second one!’
Finn shot him a murderous look, while he just scratched at his acne-scarred jaw and looked back at her flatly, like he was challenging her to defy him or something. I didn’t even want to have this party! she wanted to scream. And I wouldn’t want to have one ever again, if I had to suck up to the likes of you and Georgia in order to get a guest list going for one! But before she could say a word, Bonnie piped up with:
‘I agree with Gemma,’ Bonnie said softly, biting her lip as she examined Finn sadly from behind her glasses, apologising for Aaron with her eyes instead of her words again. ‘I totally get that you’d be within your rights to turf her Finn, but if something happens to them, you know who’ll take the fall for it- and it won’t be Georgia.’
Finn groaned. She wanted to kick Georgia out, she really did, but the other girl was sobbing so hard that she was making the bells on Finn’s skirt jangle, and Finn didn’t think that part was an act. And what was more- she didn’t want it to be an act. She wanted Georgia to apologise and mean it, and she wanted her to show up at school on Monday kind of embarrassed, but also kind of relieved that Finn Monroe, who’d had the power to embarrass her further or order her out of her party, had acted with grace and compassion! Which were two things that Georgia had never bestowed upon her.
I can be the winner here- the queen bee bitch for the ages! Finn thought, feeling her heart falter when her old friend gazed up at her as longingly through the eyes of an old friend instead of a sworn enemy. Or I can be the change I want to see… right?
‘Just… go sit down.’ Finn pried Georgia’s hands free then gently nudged her in Liam’s direction, before glancing around self-consciously at all of the people that were staring at her- kids that she barely knew, who were forming opinions about her there and then. ‘I’m going anyway so it’s your party now, and if you fall off the edge, it’s on you, not me.’
‘No!’ Georgia cried, reaching out and grasping Finn’s hand. ‘Stay with me! Aaron can entertain Liam while we catch up!’
‘Georgia, no, I-’
‘Please Finny?’ Georgia grasped her hands and looked up at her. ‘Don’t you miss us? I know I do- every day! And you know what I’ve been thinking all week? How great it would be if we could be bridesmaids next weekend together- and friends as well!’
‘Oh brother…’ Mischa groaned, but Finn felt her heart and her lower lip tremble, as moved by Georgia’s plea for unification as she had been by Cara’s the day before. Finn turned, needing to see the rage in Mischa and Jade’s eyes again so she’d be inspired to fight back for them if not for herself, but they’d both already turned away, leaving just Bonnie standing there and smiling encouragingly, beseeching Finn to do the right thing, which was funny because the last time Bonnie had done the right thing by Georgia, she’d completely and utterly screwed Finn over in the process!
Don’t think about that now… ! Finn thought, closing mental black-out drapes against the crappiest memory she had before it could sprout roots in her mind. You are NOT in the eighth grade anymore, and if you let Georgia stay at this party it’ll be because you’re strong not because you’re too scared that everyone will leave if you don’t!
‘I’m giving you one hour…’ Finn said quietly, inclining her head toward the edge of the tower and away from the heart of it, where the fire and most of the people were crowded together. ‘But I swear to god, I’d better get a better apology then: ‘I’ve had a rough couple of years,’ got it?’ She shot Aaron a dirty look. ‘Because that one’s tired, Janks- as am I. Tired of everyone’s shit.’
‘Thank you…’ Georgia breathed, resting her head on Finn’s shoulder and sighing so loudly and with so much contentment, that Finn actually shivered. The winds of change were finally blowing, and now that she could truly feel them on her skin, Finn could only pray that this time they’d change her life for the better and not for the worse again!
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
Finn tried to maintain a stiff upper lip against Georgia’s angst riddled maundering, and kept praying that someone would come over and interrupt them just so Finn would have a chance to escape. But as the sky darkened and lights started to pop on in the woods below where the more self-sufficient residents lived, Georgia delved deeply into their history like an archaeologist, polishing up only what suited her narrative, and switching threads with statements like: ‘Do you remember that time your sister helped us put on a dance concert up here, but only our mothers came? It was still so much fun!’ Or: ‘You know what’s scary? That moment when you realise that all of your parents hopes and dreams are wrapped up in you…’ which made it impossible for Finn to segue from that dark matter to: ‘Anyway, it’s been real but I’m gonna go dump water over Bonnie and Aaron before they actually fornicate in public so...’
Georgia was getting in though- digging relentlessly under the wall that she’d built between them, like a sharp-clawed terrier digging under a fence so it could access the neighbour's’ greener grass. Finn wanted to shoo her away before she could piss on her new grass and turn it brown again, but part of her hoped that there was more to it than that- and that Georgia genuinely wanted her back in her life for who she was, not just for what she had going for her now. And Finn had cause to believe that might be the case too, because there were people there who had more clout than Finn- like Liam- but instead of making a cursory apology so she could go back to flitting around like a butterfly amongst the bees, Georgia had clung to Finn all night.
‘If I meant so much to you, why’d you throw it all away?’ Finn wanted to ask. But she was afraid of triggering Georgia’s nasty side now that she was sobering up, and while they were all trying to be quiet, so Finn sat there and took the emotional battering ram against her walls and stared out at the Shards, toying with her necklace and imagining that Reeve’s arms were wrapped around her, thinking that this was as good as it was gonna get anyway, because of all the things she’d heard Georgia say over the years, ‘I’m sorry,’ was not one of them. She could say: ‘I’m sorry you took it that way!’ or ‘I’m sorry you’re so touchy!’ but she never said: ‘I’m sorry for my actions,’ because she never was. So the best Finn could hope for was that Georgia was sorry enough to stop doing things to her that warranted apologies in the first place.
I would still like an explanation though! Finn thought, sighing dejectedly as Liam made his way over for the third time. He hadn’t said a word yet- he just listened until his eyes glazed over before wandering off again, either to the small group that had gathered around the tiny fire that had been made in an old paint can, or to the larger group that had gathered around Jake the busker, who was apparently a fixture at every Roast ‘n Toast. Liam was tall and fit in a lanky way, but that was w
here the similarities to their dazzling king ended, making Finn wonder if Georgia was only talking to her because she was sick of her eligible but dull date’s company. Not just for me, but for them too! They’ve been inseparable for weeks, but I’ve never seen them holding hands! So is he just being respectful because she’s a Potential, or is he gay or…?
‘… I was so JEALOUS of that!’ Georgia said then, giggling.
‘Jealous?’ Finn’s heart tripped. Was this the admission she’d been waiting four years for? ‘Of what?’
‘How much time you spent writing in a diary that I couldn’t read!’ Georgia slurred, pulling the band out of the end of her long plait while Liam rolled his eyes before escaping their memory lane again, which probably felt like a cul-de-sac to him by then. ‘I was like: I’m her best friend! Isn’t she supposed to tell me everything?’
Finn chuckled. ‘You do know what a diary’s purpose is, yeah? To get your most shameful thoughts onto paper and out of your head so your best friends don’t find out how pathetic you are...?’ But Georgia shrugged and Finn snorted, wishing Georgia had been the one who’d turned to paper instead of on people. ‘That’s why I’d never let anyone read it- not even now.’
‘You still do that?’ Georgia asked. ‘What do you even have to put in it? I mean no offence… but isn’t Reeve the only ‘Dear Diary’ worthy thing to happen to you for years?’
Finn rolled her eyes, deciding that it was definitely time to head home. Not just because Georgia was reverting to being her blunt self, but because it was twenty to ten according to Georgia’s watch, which meant it was time to wrap things up anyway. ‘Oh you know…’ she said breezily as she straightened, smiling at Whitney and her girlfriend Cass who were singing ‘If I Die Young,’ with Jake, before searching for Jade and Gemma. ‘Dear Diary… I swear, Georgia’s the only kid in school meaner and uglier than ol’ Ag…’
Georgia leaned back, slitting her eyes at her. ‘Are you joking?
‘Of course,’ Finn scoffed, dusting off her skirt and making it tinkle. ‘Usually, I just write about what it’s like living in a kingdom after an apocalypse.’ She bit her lip and shrugged, ‘Or at least that was mostly what I wrote about, before Reeve came along…’
‘Naw…’ Georgia squinted. ‘You really like him, hey?’
‘He’s the one,’ Finn admitted, frowning out at the lights of Laidlaw behind her when she saw how many had already gone out.
‘How could you know that?’ Georgia scoffed. ‘You’re kids.’
‘Because he brings out the best in me,’ Finn said, knowing that it was true, because for the first time in her life, she didn’t care what anyone thought of her, so long as she had Reeve’s esteem, ‘and because not being with him right now hurts so much that-’ but a scream in the near-distance cut Finn off like a blade and made everyone sit up and look around.
‘Did you hear that?’ a faceless voice asked in the darkness, while Finn grasped the edge of the railing and peered over the side, searching the shadowy woods below. ‘Did someone scream?!’
‘Yeah but-’ but there was another scream then, and Finn’s eyes bugged when she saw a flicker of light within the woods go out suddenly then. ‘Shit!’ she hissed, grabbing Georgia by the wrist and dragging her backwards. ‘Everyone: be quiet and get down!’
‘Why?’ Mischa demanded, stepping close to the fire so Finn could see her frightened expression. ‘Where did it come from?’
‘Principal Van Der Merwe’s place, I think!’ Finn whispered, which caused some to gasp. ‘There was a light on there before, but it just went out with the second-’ but the woman screamed again then, then again, and again, frightening Finn so though that she lifted her hands to cup her ears in reflex as she staggered back.
Is that Beth? Finn’s insides clenched. What’s happening to her?
‘Holy crap!’ Aaron breathed, rolling off Bonnie and rushing to the railing to look for himself while other people exclaimed in horror.
‘What’s happening?’ Bonnie whimpered, and then there was another sound ringing in the darkness- bells that echoed right across the Peninsula until more joined. Everyone knew what those bells meant, because every house had one inside it, just in case!
‘It’s Outlaws!’ Georgia screamed. ‘Everybody run!’
Pandemonium broke out, as did a chorus of larger, more resonant bells in Laidlaw, and Finn felt her heart lurch into her throat when she saw six or seven kids make a dive for the ladder at once, like they were following Georgia’s rippling blonde hair like a banner.
‘Stop!’ Finn hissed at everyone as she yanked Jade back. ‘That thing is rusted through- it’ll collapse it you overload it!’
‘We’re safer up here anyway guys!’ Mischa cried softly but nobody hesitated- not even Jade. ‘The principal’s place is right under us! So if anyone’s running from there, they’ll run into you!’
‘We can’t stay up here like sitting ducks either, dickhead!’ Aaron snapped back before he shoved someone out of the way and vanished over the side of the railing. Mischa shrivelled at Aaron’s harsh words, but the sound of a guitar crashing to the ground with a crack and a twang made them all spasm and cry out then, reminding Finn that they had bigger issues than Aaron’s attitude right then!
This is so bad! Goggle-eyed, Finn watched the kids flee in fear. Outlaws in the Pen! Kids running amok! And what happened to-
‘What are we gonna do?’ Bonnie cried, straightening her glasses as she bolted their way. ‘What if the ladder snaps? We’ll be stranded!’
‘Better to be stranded here with no way of anyone getting up, then stuck down there with Outlaws!’ Mischa whispered as she began pouring a bottle of water over the fire, making it hiss and smoke and reminding Finn of how responsible she’d always been.
‘Exactly!’ Finn agreed as she ducked down into a crouch and motioned for the other two to do the same, saying a silent prayer of thanks that all three of them were wearing mostly black. ‘The Tutelary will get here within ten minutes,’ she went on in a hushed tone, ‘and I bet they’ll send a guard up here for a bird’s eye view, so when they do, we’ll explain that we were about to head to my place before curfew, and then wait with the guards until the threat’s been handled. We might get in trouble for loitering up here, but-’
‘What if an Outlaw comes up here first though?!’
Finn grimaced at Bonnie. ‘Well, the best castles in the world always had towers for a reason, didn’t they? So if they come, we’ll throw wood and bottles until-’ but a gunshot ripped the night open, causing them all to flinch again, and then when it happened a second time, Finn was sure she was going to pass out.
Oh my god oh my god! Finn felt sweat forming on the nape of her neck. Maya was right- I should have stayed home!
‘Finn…?’ Jade’s disembodied voice almost made Finn jump out of her skin as it wafted up from the ground. ‘Where you at?!’
‘Shit!’ Mischa ducked lower. ‘Is Jade crazy?!’
‘Are you still up there? Omg! Get down!’ Jade cried then, proving that yes, she was definitely reckless, if not crazy. ‘Me and Gemma don’t-’ and then Jade was screaming, and Finn was up and bolting for the ladder, feeling like her heart was clogging her throat.
‘Hey!’ Bonnie whimpered. ‘Where are you-’
‘Girls have been raped by Outlaws near here lately guys! Raped and killed- and their assailants are still out-’ Finn was cut off by the sound of more bells ringing then, which made her wince. ‘Just stay here. If I can’t come back for you myself, I’ll send someone who can!’
Swallowing, Finn began to crawl backwards down the rattling ladder then, gnashing her teeth together to ward off the dread she derived from having her back turned to the hostile darkness like that.
Once upon a time there, there’d been a few streetlights spaced along Yuibera road, as well as a security light that had always illuminated the ‘Danger: Keep Out,’ sign on the front of the tower’s utility access door. But they’d been dark for years by then, so w
hen Finn looked back over her shoulder, all she could see of the area was what was illuminated by the gibbous moon, including a few spots where the road had been worn flat enough to shine, and the faint outline of the treeline on either side of the hill. She could hear girls crying, twigs snapping and footfalls on bitumen, leaves and gravel, but whenever she turned to see who was there, they’d already vanished.
Why isn’t Jade screaming anymore? Finn wondered, coughing when one of her panted breaths caused her to suck in a fine particle of rust or dirt, which she immediately spat out. And why isn’t anyone else shooting either? But Finn grimaced, knowing that the last thing she needed to hear while her friends were all running through the bush and people’s private properties, was more gunshots anyway!
Ascending the ladder had taken five minutes earlier, because Finn had been so mindful of her skirt and what people might see from below in the daylight. And though she wasn’t strong or athletic, she had always been spry with excellent balance, so she made it down in under a minute under the cover of near-darkness, and immediately darted away from the glowing wall of the tower and into the line of trees on the Pen side of the boundary road. Jade wasn’t a sharp girl, no, but Finn was certain that she would have at least headed for Finn’s side of the divide, because she knew it so well herself!
‘Jade…?’ she hissed, doing her best to line her narrow figure up with the narrow side of the tree, to give herself cover. ‘Are you out here?’ But there was no answer. Panting, Finn looked around, trying to guess which way everyone had gone while her eyes dually scanned the ground, looking for a rock or branch that she might be able to use as a weapon. But though she could still hear branches breaking and leaves cracking all around her, it was impossible to know who was sneaking around because they were scared, and who was sneaking around because they were scary. ‘Gemma? Is- hmph!’ Finn sucked in a breath and stiffened like someone had tasered her, when she felt a long body wrap itself around her, clamping one hand over her mouth so completely that they pinned down the top of her nose too!
