Slade didn’t move, but instead watched Payne help Knight out of his T-shirt. His lover had several red spots from his hits that were sure to turn into bruises within the hour. He really didn’t want to remove his own T-shirt because the pain he felt told him Knight’s fists had done way more damage.
“Come on, Slade,” Zep prompted and reached for his T-shirt.
Slade stopped his teammate and ignored Zep’s raised eyebrow and frown. He also ignored the increased look of concern in Zep’s eyes.
“Set my nose first. No sense getting blood anywhere else,” Slade requested in order to procrastinate removing his T-shirt. When his lover flinched next to him, Slade regretted his mention of blood.
“Okay,” Zep agreed. “Deep breaths.”
They had reset enough broken noses throughout the eleven years they had worked together for Slade to trust Zep to do the deed. He tried not to tense over the renewed pain he knew Zep was about to cause. Slade took several deep breaths through his mouth and the anticipation over the incoming pain was almost worse than the pain itself when seven breaths later, Zep snapped his broken nose back into place. Tears filled his eyes and streamed down his cheeks. Slade expected the reaction since it wasn’t the first time he’d had a broken nose reset.
“Okay, let’s get this shirt off,” Zep said as if he were waiting for Slade to argue.
“I don’t think I can lift my arms high enough,” Slade finally admitted and cringed at the expression that crossed his lover’s face.
“Fuck, Slade,” Knight’s voice was shaky and he couldn’t do shit about it. “How bad did I hurt you?”
Fear, worry, and guilt filled Knight’s light blue eyes and Slade forced himself to grin. Knight had hurt him good, but he deserved it as far as he was concerned. He should’ve trusted Knight and the team to have his back and just stayed the hell home.
“A cracked rib or two,” Slade replied as if it was no big deal. “Nothing I haven’t had before.”
Slade smiled reassuringly at his lover, but when he returned his gaze to Zep, he was greeted by a doubtful expression on his teammate’s face. Slade would have just shrugged off Zep’s look of concern if it wouldn’t have caused him more pain. The flick of a knife pulled Zep’s attention away from him and for that Slade was grateful.
Zep was gentle while he cut off Slade’s T-shirt, but that didn’t stop Slade from remaining statue still. He wasn’t worried Zep would cut him. No, his teammate was just as proficient as the rest of them when it came to blades. Slade remained as still as possible because to do otherwise would hurt like hell and the last thing Slade wanted was to add to the guilt his lover already felt.
Knight held a bag of ice to his eye that was throbbing in tune with his heart. His heart raced so fast it hurt after Slade admitted he couldn’t raise his arms. He turned sideways on the couch so he could watch Zep cut Slade’s T-shirt away. His intake of breath at seeing the large dark bruises that were already forming along Slade’s ribs was so harsh that he almost began coughing.
“Oh God, Slade,” Knight whispered again, but in the silence of the apartment he was sure even the audio surveillance picked up his words.
The dark black and blue bruises along Slade’s flank shouldn’t be so prominent so soon after their fight if his lover only had a cracked rib. No, what Knight was looking at was way more than a crack in one rib. It was a few broken ribs. The thought that he could have punctured one of his lover’s lungs from continuing to beat on him made him so ill that he shot up from the couch and dashed into his bathroom.
Knight barely made it before he was throwing up the dinner Matt had made him for their date. He emptied his stomach in the bowl and didn’t even feel his aches and pains from the fight. All Knight felt was the crushing pain in his chest from his heart breaking and the guilt that barely allowed him to breathe. He heaved and heaved until nothing but bile was left to throw up and his stomach cramped from the effort.
“Here,” Payne said softly from behind as a wet washcloth appeared in Knight’s peripheral vision.
Knight reached out blindly and accepted the rag while his other hand maintained a death grip on the toilet. In between his stomach trying to expel nothing that was left, Knight fought off the hyperventilation that was threatening to cause him to pass out.
“I could’ve killed him,” Knight managed to pant out. “God, I could’ve killed him.” He glanced at his bruised and bloodied knuckles that grasped the toilet so tightly they ached.
“You didn’t,” Payne offered consolingly before he moved closer and put a hand on Knight’s back. “Slow down your breathing, Knight,” Payne encouraged. “Slade is fine, but if you pass out on that bowl, he will never let you forget it and you know how he is.”
Knight heard the light playful tone in Payne’s words and wished he could just laugh away how he was currently feeling. However, he couldn’t. He was too consumed with guilt to even consider making light of the damage his blind rage had caused his lover; the rage that could’ve killed his lover.
Slade watched Knight bolt from the room and heard his lover’s retching. He was about to follow when Payne shot him a look. His teammate’s quelling look told him not to even think about following Knight. He frowned and forced himself to return his attention back to Zep who was currently mumbling curses under his breath.
“Don’t be pissed at him on my account,” Slade said softly and waited for Zep to look at him before he continued. “All of this is my fault.”
“No, it’s not,” Zep argued. “This is way over the line, Slade.”
Of all of the agents on their team, Slade and Zep had the longest and closest relationship. Ever since he rescued Zep from the life his mother’s boyfriend had planned for him, Zep looked up to him like he was the kid’s big brother. Slade never minded before, but now he wouldn’t allow their long relationship to interfere with the team or his relationship with Knight.
“Over the line, but still my fault,” Slade countered. “I should’ve respected him more and trusted him to complete this op with the rest of you having his back.” Slade took Zep’s hand. “His reaction was harsh, but I deserved it and if I’m not going to hate him for what went down here, you can’t either.”
“Harsh?” Zep asked angrily and pulled his hand out of Slade’s grasp. “You need to go to the fucking hospital, Slade.” Zep glared. “You have broken ribs on one side, cracked on the other judging by the looks of it, and will more than likely be pissing blood the next time you take a leak from what I can see of the bruises over your kidneys.”
Slade smiled at the man he recruited so many years ago. Zep’s concern over his well-being was appreciated, but his anger on his behalf was unwanted.
“Rob, this is between me and Knight,” Slade started. “I fucked up by not trusting him or the team to have his back,” Slade repeated. “He fucked up by overreacting.” Slade willed Zep to understand. “This fight is between lovers and has nothing to do with the team or the op aside from my lack of trust in everybody.”
Zep stared at him for several moments before Slade witnessed hurt make an appearance in the man’s hazel eyes. It was clear Slade’s words pertaining to a lack of trust in the team to keep Knight safe, to have his lover’s back, finally registered.
“I’m sorry, Zep,” Slade offered sincerely.
“I know you are,” Zep replied softly and Slade momentarily wondered how his actions were going to affect his relationship with the man and the team.
Slade was still staring at Zep when he caught sight of Payne out of the corner of his eye. For the first time since his teammates arrived, he wondered why they were here at all. Not that Slade didn’t appreciate their interference because he really would have hated himself if he had been forced to shoot his lover.
“How did you to end up here anyway?” Slade asked around a wince caused by pressing ice against his broken ribs.
“Hunt became concerned when Knight wasn’t screaming at you and you weren’t defending yourself,” Payne answered.
&nb
sp; “I’m sure it was the lack of Knight not yelling that bothered him more than you not fighting back,” Zep added.
Slade didn’t look back at Zep but instead passed Payne. He couldn’t see anything, but an empty hall. Payne must have seen where he was looking because his teammate took a step closer.
“He’s in the bedroom,” Payne offered. “I’d ask if you were coming back to the house, but I already know the answer.”
Slade gingerly stood and had to fight not to grimace in pain. Zep was more than likely right he should go to a hospital. However, they wouldn’t do anything other than wrap his ribs and give him ibuprofen. Even if he ended up pissing blood, which was really likely to happen, a hospital wouldn’t be able to do shit about it other than pump him full of fluids.
“I’ll be fine.” Slade offered them a weak smile that was supposed to be reassuring.
“I’m sure you will be,” Payne replied with a grin. “Come on, Zep.”
Zep didn’t move from Slade’s side as Payne headed toward the door. When Slade turned toward him, he could still see a tinge of hurt in his teammate’s eyes. He wanted to say something to reassure Zep, but before he could, Zep turned and walked to the door. He didn’t look back before he walked into the hall and Slade met Payne’s gaze.
“We’ll all be fine,” Payne reassured before he disappeared and closed the apartment door behind him.
Slade hobbled to the door and locked up behind his teammates. He took a moment to gather his thoughts as he leaned his back against the closed door. Knight was wrecked over their fight if the puking he heard earlier coming from the bathroom was any gauge of how his lover felt.
Slade had easily read the regret and guilt in Knight’s gaze. He understood that how his lover felt about injuring him was going to be the biggest obstacle to getting them back to where they were before Slade so epically fucked up things between them. With a sigh, Slade pushed off the door and made his way to Knight’s bedroom.
Knight lay curled into a ball with his back facing the door. His lover was shirtless and wearing nothing but dark blue boxer briefs. Just the sight of seeing Knight practically naked after their few months apart sent a jolt of arousal through Slade. Of course, he was too banged up to do a damn thing about it, but he felt it just the same.
At first, Slade thought Knight was asleep. He should’ve known better even if he didn’t expect his lover to tense when the sounds of him removing his boots and jeans reached Knight’s ears.
Knight heard clothes dropping to the floor and couldn’t help tensing. There was only one person who would be undressing in his bedroom. A flood of emotions followed his realization that Slade was still in his apartment. Not only still in his apartment, but in his bedroom. The bed dipped behind him, but Knight was too afraid to turn around.
“I can’t hold you, so you’re going to have to hold me,” Slade whispered softly to Knight’s back and wasn’t really sure his lover would even turn to face him. He breathed a mental sigh of relief when Knight did.
“Aaron,” Knight started when he faced his lover who laid flat on his back.
“This is on me, Mike,” Slade cut off Knight and took his hand to place it on his chest. “Tomorrow. We’ll talk tomorrow. Right now, I just want to enjoy your touch.”
Knight couldn’t believe his ears. His lover’s tone was nothing but sincere and Knight doubted he would react the same way if the tables were turned. Still, he rested his palm over Slade’s chest and let the steady beat of his lover’s heart lull him into an exhausted sleep.
Eleven
The first thing Knight’s mind registered while his body came out of the slumber of sleep was warmth spreading from practically under his chest, against his groin, and along one of his legs. It was a sensation he was more than used to and enjoyed the hell out of. Waking up draped over his lover was almost, almost, better than the sex they enjoyed. He felt his arousal and didn’t hesitate to press his body closer to Slade.
The hiss of pain that suddenly sliced through the silence of the bedroom was like an electroshock to Knight’s brain. He scrambled off his lover so quickly that he fell off the side of the bed.
“Oomph.”
How could he have forgotten what he had done to Slade? How could he cause the man more pain than he already had the night before? Guilt overwhelmed and crushed him again. All he managed to do was bury his head against his arms that were wrapped around his knees.
“Hey,” Slade stood over his lover.
Slade hadn’t been fully awake when the sudden pressure against his side caused a hiss of pain to escape his lips. The sudden loss of heat against his body was what startled him awake only a moment before a thump on the floor had him out of bed. The way Knight sat on the floor next to the bed, practically folded in on himself, made him almost unrecognizable to Slade.
“Babe?” Slade squatted in front of Knight’s settled form even though it hurt like hell. He placed a hand on the side of his lover’s head and allowed his fingers to gently caress the dark hair under his palm. “Come back to bed.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” Knight said without raising his head from where he had it buried against his knees.
Slade wasn’t sure if his lover was referring to their fight the previous night or to what had just happened in bed. It didn’t matter to him either way. Right now, all he wanted was to have his lover back in bed next to him.
“It’s okay.” Slade caressed the side of Knight’s head again.
“It’s not,” Knight replied miserably without lifting his head. He’d be embarrassed about the weakness he could hear in his tone if he weren’t so wracked with guilt over hurting the only man he’d ever loved.
“If you say so,” Slade replied lightly. “But if you really don’t want to make up for it…”
Knight’s head shot up. He’d do anything to make up for what he’d done to Slade. He had no hope there was anything he could do, but whatever Slade asked of him, he would do.
“Tell me,” Knight prompted on a whisper.
“Come back to bed.” Slade smiled at his lover’s wide-eyed expression. “I just need to feel you against me again.”
“But…”
Slade cut off what he knew his lover was about to say. “I’ve missed you and that was only one of the reasons that played a part in my stupidity. Come back to bed, Mike.”
All Knight could do was nod even though the wince on his lover’s face when Slade stood broke his heart more. He waited until Slade resettled onto his back then Knight lay on his side next to him. Knight rested the palm of his hand over Slade’s heart, but didn’t dare to get closer for fear of hurting his lover again.
“Come here.” Slade smiled. “My arm isn’t hurt.”
Slade lifted his arm and used it to pull Knight closer. Once their bodies touched again, Slade pulled his lover’s head to rest against the side of his neck. He placed a soft kiss atop Knight’s head and for a moment just breathed in his scent.
“Go back to sleep, babe,” Slade whispered, kissed Knight’s head again, and followed his own order.
Knight called out of work for the next few days with the excuse he was in a car accident. He cleaned up the pieces of the broken coffee table and spent the day watching TV with Slade. By the time their delivered dinner arrived, Knight’s guilt wasn’t so suffocating and he began to accept Slade’s forgiveness.
Hunt had dropped off pain medication earlier so they were both already feeling better. Their teammate was still pissed, but at least now all he did was glare angrily at them both. Now, they were both feeling almost pain-free as Knight lay with his head on Slade’s lap while they watch TV. Slade’s fingers caressed through Knight’s hair and Knight’s fingers ghosted in small circles on the side of Slade’s naked thigh. They had only been on the couch in this position for less than half an hour when Slade broke the silence.
“Knight,” Slade whispered.
Knight smiled even though it caused him to wince from the split in his lip. He felt Slade�
�s erection on the back of his head soon after he started running his fingers over his lover skin. His intent wasn’t to arouse Slade. Then again, he didn’t intend to become so turned on by Slade’s equally innocent touches.
“Hmm, too bad we both feel like shit even after taking the pain meds,” Knight mumbled and placed a kiss on Slade’s thigh.
Slade tilted his hips to press his erection on the back of Knight’s head. “I could be in agony and still want you. Come up here,” Slade requested.
Knight lifted his head, sat up, and didn’t hesitate to kiss Slade. The kiss started out softly, but quickly became heated with hunger. Knight resisted Slade’s pull on his hips that was Slade silent plea for Knight to straddle him.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” Knight whispered against Slade’s lips when he pulled back from their kiss.
“The only thing that hurts right now, is this,” Slade took Knight’s hand and pressed it on his hard cock. He sighed when Knight gave him a squeeze before he roughly kissed Knight again.
A groan escaped Knight’s lips when his fingers wrapped around Slade’s hard flesh. He ignored the pain that throbbed in his split lip that was caused by their hungry kisses when he dragged his thumb over Slade’s wet slit. However, when Slade pushed up into his palm on his second stroke, he released his lover.
“Knight,” Slade growled out with frustration. He understood that Knight was concerned about his injuries, but at the moment he wasn’t feeling any pain aside from the throbbing in his cock. Slade wrapped a hand around Knight’s wrist and pulled
“Just…,” Slade began and ignored the frown that was starting to form on Knight’s face. “I want more and you won’t hurt me.” Slade released Knight’s wrist and tugged on Knight’s gym shorts. “Take these off.”
The pleading, hungry gaze from Slade’s blue eyes and the rough tone of promise broke Knight’s remaining hesitation. He stood from the couch and dropped his shorts to the floor while watching Slade push the elastic of his shorts down under his balls. Knight had missed Slade so much over the last few months. Missed his voice, missed his taste, missed his touch, and missed his lover buried deep inside of him.
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