by A. M. Wilson
I break eye contact to bounce my gaze around the space that up until yesterday belonged to my employer.
“That was her bed. Your marital bed.”
“I’ll burn the damn bed, Evie.”
My hand pulls away next. “It’s not…It’s not just about the bed.” I spin away in order to collect my thoughts without him interpreting my face.
The weight of his hand settles on my shoulder. His voice gentles considerably, and even without seeing his expression, I know it’s etched with concern. “Is Tommy a deal breaker?”
“God, no.” I turn back to face him reluctantly. “That beautiful little boy stole my heart from the moment I saw him. I didn’t know he was yours, but I knew he was special.” The vehemence I deliver coats every word. “I might not be able to have kids of my own, but that doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate the ones around me, no matter how much it hurts.”
“I don’t want to hurt you.” His voice carries an ache.
“Sometimes we have to go through a little pain in order to come out on the other side.”
“If it isn’t Tommy, then what is it?”
“This is too fast.” I gnaw the inside of my lip. “A day ago, I cleaned this house for money. It doesn’t feel right being here.”
“I’ll be damned if I’m sleeping here, and you’re in your car.” He resurrects our ongoing argument.
“You and Eric should really form a club,” I retort dryly with a sarcastic snort.
“It’s not funny.” Rhett steps closer, and I step back. His irritation magnifies at my move. “I was with the same woman for fifteen years. She fucks that up, and I set off on a revenge screw that turns into many nights with many different women.”
My stomach twists an ugly knot at having him spell it out for me after the nights we’ve spent together. I tamp down the jealousy. He’s never hidden the type of guy he was from me, and I never expected him to.
“What’s fast isn’t you moving into this house. What’s fast is that from the moment I saw you, I couldn’t see anyone else. Happened like that.” His fingers snap for emphasis, but I’m lost to his confession to process much else. “Haven’t looked at another woman and certainly haven’t slept with one since before we met. Hell, someone touched my arm at Calypso’s, and I damn near tore her fingers off because she wasn’t you.”
“Rhett—”
“Would have broken them one by one if I had to,” he growls.
“You really strapped dynamite to this situation and lit the fuse.”
“If it gets you safe with me, I’d power a damn rocket ship if I have to.”
I step back, increasing the space between us. “I need a little time.”
“Did I read this that wrong?” He swishes his index finger between us.
“No. You didn’t,” I rush to reassure him. “But my life isn’t a romance novel. I don’t need the hero with his big bucks to swoop in and solve all my problems. If this is going to be something we explore, I need to know I can stand on my own two feet first.”
“Can you at least park in my driveway while you sleep?”
He deserves some bonus points for trying, but I’m not going to cave, no matter what he says.
“Even though Nora fired me, I still have enough saved for a place. It doesn’t get me out of debt, and I won’t build a savings for a while, but at least I can afford a roof over my head.”
Rhett brushes his thumb across the crest of my cheek, closing the distance once more. “How much do you like me, Evie?”
“A hell of a lot,” I murmur honestly.
“Me too. Which means I’m not giving up on you. I’ll wear that sweet ass down one way or another.”
So distracted by our conversation, I don’t notice Tommy crossing the room until little hands pat my legs.
“Play fwucks?”
Rhett coughs to disguise a laugh. “We’re working on that t-r sound.”
I bend down to speak at his level, and he cups my cheeks in his little hands. My gaze snaps to Rhett’s to find him intently watching the exchange.
“Pwetty,” Tommy says and smiles a toothy grin.
“You trained him for this, didn’t you?” I ask his dad as I scoop the little boy easily into my arms.
“He’s just a smart kid.”
“Well, I’m keeping him.” I smile and sway as Tommy squeals like he did last night. Such an easy kid to please.
My thoughts drift to his mother, and a sadness takes the place of the happy. I hope she can find it in her heart to come back for his sake.
And if not, he might be better off without her. She’ll miss her chance, and a new woman will come along, fitting into Rhett’s side like a puzzle piece.
I’m just not sure if that woman should be me. The two of them deserve better.
24
Rhett
For the first weekend in a long while, I don’t have to participate in the custody charade. That doesn’t mean I don’t spend hours on Saturday anticipating Nora showing up out of the blue with a change of heart. I can’t say I wouldn’t welcome it—I’d rather have her involved in Tommy’s life than not at all. The woman and I are no longer meant for one another, haven’t been for a long time if I’m being honest, but Tommy doesn’t deserve her sudden abandonment.
Someday, my little boy will have questions about his mother, and the only answer I currently have is she didn’t want him. How fucked up is that? If we’re lucky, someone may fill the role, and he’ll never know how badly that desertion can feel.
Am I insane for thinking about a certain redhead in this scenario?
The same stubborn redhead who refuses to come over today because she needs space.
I get it. Losing this house and Nora was a huge blow to her income. Seeing the ledger Nora kept and the amount she was paying Evie, I can only thank God they happened to run into each other. Almost as if fate intervened and put Nora in her path, knowing full well Evie wouldn’t accept money from me. Somehow, my own accounts ended up funding her security deposit. Never mind the significant chunk Nora took out of them for other trivial shit. The court can sort out those details later.
After this weekend, I hope we have a lock on her own place and can start the process of moving her in somewhere safe.
If she didn’t need her vehicle for transportation, I’d set fire to her car so she can never sleep there again.
A text buzzes my phone while I sit on the floor and play with Tommy. I despise the memories this place holds, but I can’t deny the contentment I feel being home with my son. Despite the horrible eyesore décor. Nora hired an interior decorator to fill the space with stuffy pieces she thought elevated our status. Covering the walls in beer posters and naked chicks isn’t my forte, but I’d like to sit in my living room without feeling like my jeans might taint the furniture.
Living a simple life for the last however many weeks opened my eyes to a lot of things. One of the most important being I don’t need all this extravagance. Not for survival and sure as shit not for happiness. I’ve made it with minimal clothing, a place to fall asleep, and a good woman at my side to make me laugh.
I bypass the incoming text as the realization strikes hard and fast and find the contact for Nathan.
Me: Need your real estate agent info.
He texts back immediately.
Nathan: Finally! Though if I knew you’d be moving, I would have bought that house for Kiersten.
Me: 0/10 would recommend. Needs a heavy dose of sage to clear out Nora’s demons. Also twofold question. I’m also needing a hookup for Evie.
Nathan: You want to set her up on a date with my real estate agent? He’s a little old.
Me: No, you fucker. She needs her own place to live.
The blazing heat I feel at his innocuous text should tell me everything about where I stand with this woman.
Nathan: She doesn’t have one already?
Shit. I revealed more than I intended.
Me: Hers was temporary while she settled in. Now
she needs somewhere more permanent.
He responds with the local number. I add the digits to my contacts before tapping over to the other text.
Evie: Doing my daily rounds before anyone sends out a search squad. Eric and Caiti landed safely. I’m going to Cami’s for a few hours to help her deep clean.
Me: Appreciate the update. Call me when you’re done.
Evie:…space, remember?
Me: Hey, you reached out first with your daily agenda. I’m just reminding you where I stand.
My stance becomes more apparent to me by the minute.
I spent years of my life with one woman. We were young and crazy, and our foundation was based on mutual attraction rather than common interests. We should have grown up together. Our trajectory’s proven we only grew apart.
All the women who filled the void were based on mutual attraction too.
The difference I feel with Evie is startling. Attraction brought me to her car in the parking lot, but her humor and zest kept me coming around. The easy banter was a juicy cherry I couldn’t resist.
Being single in my thirties means I know more about who I am and what I want. What I don’t. Nora’s gifted me an extensive list of traits to avoid. The ones that don’t mesh with mine.
Selfishness.
Narcissistic.
Compassionless and apathetic.
Nora couldn’t be bothered to ask about my day after fifteen years together. Evie’s known me a few weeks and tears up at the thought of my son not having his mom. She cares. She simply fucking cares.
I glance over at my son happily racing cars across the carpet. His sandy hair sticks up in all directions, and remnants of a graham cracker contaminate the corner of his mouth. For months, all I wanted was to be back in this house with him, with his toys and in his space. I finally have what I want, and I can’t sit here another minute. Not while something is missing.
“Want to go for a car ride, bub?”
I heft myself from sitting on the floor with the groan all thirty-somethings make. It’d do me well to get back to using a gym before I’m old and rusty. A reminder that I have one in this house, and I plan to give up such a luxury.
Tommy drops his cars. “Yah, Dah.”
I scoop him up with an exaggerated groan. “When did you get so big and heavy?” I ask, pretending to drop him every few steps. His happy giggles settle deep within my soul. I hope I never forget these sounds.
His shoes give him a mighty struggle, and I wait patiently for him to figure it out.
“You did it!” His little hand smacks mine in a high-five.
“I did it!” he screeches and claps his hands.
“Now, let’s go to the store.”
Five little warm fingers wrap around two of mine. I lead him to my Jeep and click the buckle into place.
“What we doing?”
A glance in the rear-view reveals him watching the scenery pass by his window. Overcome with a sudden yawn, he stuffs a fist into his mouth. The move reminds me I’m now responsible for his order and routine, something Nora left out in her haste to leave. So far, he’s taken the adjustment in strides.
“We’re going to get a present for my friend.”
“What friend?” He watches me intently now as I check on him again.
“Her name is Evie.”
“Ebie?”
If he calls her that in front of her, she’s going to melt into a puddle. “Do you remember Evie? She played trucks with you.”
“Ebie play fwucks wif me?”
“How about we buy you a new truck, and you can ask her?”
“Okay.” He reaches for the chest buckle as I put the Jeep into park.
“Hold on there, bub. Wait for me.”
Tommy points his tongue out of the side of his mouth while he struggles with the buckle. Once he figures out the mechanism, I’m in trouble. Unsnapping the top and bottom straps, I step back for him to climb out of the car. I take his hand, and together, we walk into the department store in order to buy our Ebie some presents.
Hours later, after some shopping, a nap for the both of us, and a stop for a meal, Tommy and I anticipate Evie’s arrival in the convenience store parking lot. The little man holds a toy truck under one arm with a look of pride on his little face, his other hand clutched in mine. He chose the red fire engine himself with no arguments from me.
The familiar car races into the lot, coming to a halt in her usual spot. Knowing she intends to sleep here alone sends a dagger into my chest. One that twists every time I fail to convince her of another option.
“Hey,” she greets in a cautious tone, stepping out with her dog. “What are you guys doing here?”
Tommy frees his hand from mine and thrusts his toy at arm’s length.
“Did you get a new toy?” Evie drops to a crouch. The new position tempts Tommy forward.
“Ebie play fwucks wif me?” He repeats his earlier question without any prompting from me. I’d say my little man is as taken with this woman as I am. Not that I can blame him. She radiates an inviting personality with ease.
“Of course I’ll play with you.” Evie holds out her hand, and Tommy latches on immediately. I relieve her of the leash as we stroll toward the open field.
“You have to know using your son to win me over is a dirty move.” Her scowl falls short of convincing.
“That was one-hundred-percent him. I swear.”
“He called me Ebie.” Her voice drops into a whisper nearly disguised by the swish of tall grass around our ankles. “That has to be the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.”
I swell with pride and want to bang fists on my chest. My little man scores us a win.
Tommy stops at a random location. The level ground looks as good as any to spread a blanket and relax. Evie and I each settle on a hip, Ghost relaxes at my side with an exaggerated huff, and Tommy immediately starts driving his new truck around our space. Every few minutes, he sets it in front of Evie and waits patiently for her to give the truck a spin before taking it back.
“I brought dinner if you’re hungry.”
A soft smile lingers on her lips, though at my question, it drops.
“You should be careful bringing him around me.”
“One meal isn’t going to hurt.” Though she isn’t wrong, I refuse to concede. Something brews between us. Whether it’s a gentle change of the tide or a cataclysmic storm remains to be seen.
“I need space to figure things out, and so far, you’re determined not to give it to me.” She plants one foot on the ground and crooks her knee, resting her elbow there. A breeze captures tendrils of her hair that shine in the setting sun. The candid appearance highlights her beauty.
I wrap my fingers around her delicate wrist. “You have to understand that I can’t just walk away from you in this parking lot and be okay with it.”
“You don’t exactly have a choice. You have to realize you already won me over. The rest is about me.”
“Wanting to take care of you isn’t about winning you over.” I offer her a wrapped deli sandwich on ciabatta bread.
“Buying me things proves there’s a discrepancy. One I’m working hard to minimize so I don’t feel like a freeloader.”
Tommy crawls over and plants himself right in Evie’s lap, curbing the majority of our conversation. I hand him his own turkey and cheese sandwich on sliced bread.
“I don’t see it that way.”
She huffs in quiet frustration. “I’m so close to feeling my own sense of independence. Once I replace the loss of Nora’s business and gain a few more clients, I’ll be there. I can almost taste it.”
“Then why not let me help?” I dig into my own food with a hearty bite.
“I can’t explain it any more than I already have.”
The conversation halts over half-eaten sandwiches and tumultuous feelings. As soon as Tommy drops the remnants of his crust, Evie gives the fire truck a few more passes around the blanket before she stands and wipes her hands on h
er gray yoga pants.
“Where are you going?” I tuck the loose deli paper packaging back into the plastic bag I brought with us.
She speaks to the horizon. “I’m going to go for a while. Be alone with my thoughts.”
“Wait.” The note of panic in my tone is undisguised. “I brought you some things.” I shake out the plastic bag, and items drop to the blanket. A container of bear spray for predators of the animal or human variety. An alarm for her keychain that screeches ungodly loud when pulled. A spare key to my house so she can come use the shower or hopefully the guest bed.
“Rhett, stop. Please.” Her eyes hold a touch of sadness. “You can’t spend money to fix this. I let you get away with buying me dinner for weeks now, but this is too much.”
I run a hand through my hair, feeling lost. “What good is having money if I can’t use it to help?”
“Maybe you need space too so you can figure that one out. If you think I like you for your money or have been sleeping with you in hopes you’ll be my sugar daddy, you’re dead wrong.” She holds out her hand for Ghost’s leash.
“Whoa, Evie. I never thought that was your intention.” I rise to my feet to stop her.
A sad smile stretches her lips. “Please give me my dog.” Her patience wanes. I reluctantly hand over the leash and tuck my unoccupied hands into my pockets, not about to make a scene in front of my son.
“When can I see you again?”
“I’ll let you know. But for the time being, it’s probably best we remain as friends.”
She removes my access to her as easily as one sheds clothing and diminishes my choices down to one. Wait for her until she’s ready.
Because I sure as fuck won’t give up without a fight.
25
Evie
Ominous, dark clouds float low overhead as Ghost and I crest the top of the cliff. A less impulsive person would have glanced at a weather report before taking a hike a few hours long. Instead, I’m too busy fleeing the memories of last night to pay enough attention. I tip my face to the darkening sky. There’s a probable chance we’ll be returning in the rain.
