by M. J. Haag
“No.”
“Why do I have to be quiet?”
“It upsets Emily when you scream.”
That didn’t seem like Emily. She was more the type to either high-five me or quietly leave the house to give us privacy. She’d never begrudge me having a good time.
I frowned at him, wondering why he thought that until I remembered the conversation I’d overheard in the kitchen.
“She didn’t like hearing me scream in pain and fear when you spanked and bit me. The screaming I’d do now would only be from pleasure. That wouldn’t upset her. Well, not the way the basement time did.”
He considered my words and grunted.
“I will ask her to be sure.”
I snorted.
“You do that.”
Getting out of bed, I looked over my shoulder at him.
“Why do I have to shower and you don’t? You could join me.”
I loved the way his gaze heated at the thought.
“I will shower later when I can kneel at your feet and taste you until you beg and say my name. Then we will return to the bed and I will—”
I held up a hand.
“Nope. You’re just teasing me now. You better deliver on all your promises or you’re the one who’ll get bitten next.”
Even under the straining confines of his pants, his dick twitched. I grinned and walked away, already thinking of what I’d bite first.
It wasn’t until I was headed downstairs that I remembered what awaited. Leaving. The idea scared me, but not with the complete hopeless terror that had ruled my life for so long.
I still knew there was a very real chance I could die out there. But I’d also heard what Nancy was saying yesterday. I couldn’t keep hiding from my reality. Like the drinking, hiding wouldn’t make the truth go away.
Emily had hot cinnamon rolls waiting on the counter for me when I appeared.
“Any chance you’d rather stay here and help me make more of these today?” she asked.
The dark circles under her hopeful eyes made me feel guilty. Instead of sitting, I moved around the counter and hugged her tightly.
“I need to go. I don’t want to be the person I’ve been since I got here, anymore.”
“But you’re not.”
“I’m starting not to be. But I need to finish. I need to face the reality of what’s out there and stop hiding from it. Let me do this.”
She pulled back and looked into my eyes before nodding.
I gave her another quick hug and grabbed my roll to go since Merdon had already finished his.
“We’ll be back before dark,” he promised Emily.
“Okay.”
She looked so sad and unhappy as I started for the door. I couldn’t leave her like that.
“Hey, would you mind if I screamed a little during sex?”
Her expression went blank before disbelief then humor painted her features.
“I’ll pound on the walls if I want you to take it down a notch,” she said. “I’ll make sure it’s loud enough that you’ll hear it over the bed squeaking.”
I laughed as I left and hoped I’d return in the same mood.
Merdon carried my bow and a quiver I’d never seen before so I could finish eating my roll. It sat heavy in my stomach and churned with my worry, but I didn’t regret eating it. If I was going to die today, I’d die happy. Merdon and I were good. So were Emily and I. Even Mary had pretty much forgiven me for my bad behavior, even though the behavior that set her off hadn’t been my fault.
I licked my fingers clean then took my things from Merdon.
“Are you worried?” I asked him.
His gaze lingered on my face before he focused on the road once more.
“I will always worry about you,” he said. “I worry less knowing that you will listen.”
I grinned slightly.
“I think I like getting bossed around in bed. I’m not sure about daily life, though.”
His scowl deepened.
“Do not test me, Hannah.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
We reached the wall and found the volunteer fey already mingling there, having quiet conversations. Brenna and Thallirin were still missing.
“How many humans will be on this trip?” I asked Merdon, my gaze on the excited Tasha, who was talking animatedly to Uan.
“Five. You, Tasha, and Brenna will ride in the two trucks with Garrett and Ryan.”
It reassured me to know there wouldn’t be many of us. That meant more fey paying attention to our safety.
As soon as the missing members joined us, Merdon picked me up and jumped over the wall. The sudden drop to the other side didn’t help settle my stomach. I tucked my face into his chest as he ran and waited for the second jump.
Matt was waiting inside Tenacity’s walls when we arrived.
“Morning,” he called. His observant gaze caught on me. “You look like you’re doing better, Hannah.”
“I am. Thank you.”
He nodded and handed Ryan two keys.
“They’re all yours. We’re ready to welcome whatever stock you want us to watch over for you.”
“How’s the last haul of feed holding up?” Ryan asked.
“Good. That farmer has been a real help in educating all of us on how to care for the cows. This plan to share knowledge is a good one. The three fey who’ve been coming over daily seem to be more accepted now than when this all started. Hopefully, the other things that Emily’s working on will help too. How’s Mya?”
“Getting better now that she’s almost out of the first trimester but still a little green around the edges.”
Matt nodded.
“My wife was the same with our first. Morning sickness completely went away during the second half.”
I realized then how little I knew about Tenacity’s leader.
“I’ll let Mya know there’s hope then,” Ryan said with a grin.
“There’s more hope today than there was yesterday. That’s all we can ask for.” Matt shook Ryan’s hand then headed toward men stationed at the wall to help them with the new, heavy gates.
We loaded into the trucks and pulled out of Tenacity as the sun broke over the trees. The clear sky and brown spots poking through the snow in the fields gave me plenty of hope for a good day. That, along with the complete absence of infected, almost made the world seem normal.
“First time on a supply run?” Garrett asked.
“Yeah. I’m trying not to overthink it and freak myself out. Last I heard, the traps were getting worse for you guys.”
“Yeah, the infected are trying harder, but we’re still smarter. All they’re doing is helping the fey thin their numbers before they run off.”
“They run off?”
He nodded. “They’re smart enough to know when a trap is failing. Those that can, bail.”
“It reminds me of something my dad said about fishing.”
“What’s that?”
“You release the big ones so they can breed and make more fish.”
I tore my gaze from the landscape and looked at Garrett.
“Completely different, though, right?”
“Right.”
The second he’d hesitated before answering was more honest than his response.
I told myself I had nothing to worry about as I looked out the window at Merdon. He would keep me safe. They all would.
He and Thallirin ran side by side, leading the caravan as the rest of the fey spread out around the trucks.
We drove for almost three hours before Thallirin signaled with a lifted arm. The trucks began to slow with the fey. Merdon continued on at the same pace. My heart clenched to see him running away from me.
The stretch of road appeared clear. Yet, that wasn’t what worried me so much as the tree-lined ditches. I understood that Merdon was probably scouting ahead because we were getting close.
“Why does Merdon have to go alone?” I asked softly.
&nbs
p; “Because he’d rather the rest of the fey guard what’s most important to him while he’s not here to do it himself.”
I glanced at Garrett and offered him a weak smile.
“Who’s going to protect what’s most important to me?”
“He will. Don’t worry. He knows he needs to come back. He wouldn’t have brought you out here if he thought he couldn’t keep both you and himself safe.”
I focused on the trees as Merdon veered off the road. For several moments, there was nothing. When he reappeared, though, I could see the dark stains on his clothes even from this distance.
He signaled it was clear, and Garrett eased the truck forward after the fey. Merdon didn’t run ahead again but waited for the truck to pass him and jumped up next to my window. Blood dotted his face.
I set my hand to the window as if I would touch his cheek.
“You be careful,” I warned through the window.
“You will do as you’re told.”
I rolled my eyes even as my insides clenched.
“I already promised. What exactly do you think I’m going to do? Jump out of the truck and go running through the trees? Hell, no. Been there and still have nightmares about it. Give me some credit. I’m smart, no matter what you say.”
He tilted his head at me.
“You’re smart when you think, not when you react.”
“Gee, thanks.”
He grinned at me then jumped down. I stared after him in shock as he ran to catch up to Thallirin.
“I think that’s the first real smile I’ve seen from him,” I said to Garrett.
“And I think that’s the first real smile I’ve seen on you,” he said.
I realized I was smiling and settled back on my seat.
“It’s weird,” I said. “I thought life was over. Instead, Merdon’s proving I’ve barely begun to live.”
My heart thrummed with the possibilities of a future with him, and I remembered the way his hand had rested over my stomach when I woke this morning, and my pulse stuttered erratically. I didn’t want a baby. I was too scared and unsure who I was yet. But, someday, maybe, I’d be able to give Merdon the world he wanted.
“Shit!”
Garrett braked hard.
I’d been so caught up in my hopes for the future that I hadn’t registered the scene as the truck pulled into the long, gravel driveway.
A trail of blood and dead cows led to a cluster of infected grouped around the barn near the silo. The way the infected rocked slightly as they stared at the structure was beyond weird and not how I remembered them behaving.
My gaze flicked to Merdon, who studied the infected with the rest of the fey. With his back to me, I couldn’t see his face. Why weren’t the fey telling us to run?
The dead cows disturbed me. But the way the infected were acting, swaying and ignoring the sounds of the idling trucks, terrified me. They didn’t do that. Noise drew them. Always.
Garrett seemed to have the same thought because he cut the engine.
In front of the fey, the infected stopped swaying.
One by one, they turned. Over one hundred milky white eyes focused on our caravan.
A small, panicked noise escaped my lips.
Chapter Thirty
“It’s okay, Hannah,” Garrett said, reaching across the seat to take my hand. “The fey won’t let them get near us.”
He’d barely said the words when the majority of the fey positioned themselves around the trucks.
Merdon looked back at me, and I shook my head at him because I already knew what he was thinking about doing.
He tapped his ear and pointed at me. And the truck. He wanted me to remember my promise to do as I was told and stay in the truck.
I put my free hand on the windshield, a plea and a promise. He’d said that he’d live in the world I chose. Well, that went two ways.
“Don’t you dare die,” I whispered before removing my hand from the glass.
He tipped his head at me then faced the infected. Thallirin said something to him, and they both strode forward together.
The infected didn’t surge in their direction as I expected but stayed right where they were.
“Is that weird?” I asked, still holding Garrett’s hand.
“Yep.”
I could tell the infected were watching the fey, but they weren’t moving more than their heads.
“I don’t like this,” Garrett said.
“You’re not helping.”
Thallirin grabbed one of the infected by the head and decapitated it with one forceful jerk. The body fell. None of the surrounding infected moved.
Merdon and Thallirin shared a look then rushed forward, removing heads and throwing bodies. The savage brutality should have upset me, and maybe it would have if it’d been humans dying rather than infected. As it was, I felt nothing but relief that Merdon and Thallirin were killing so many with ease.
A single, mournful bellow echoed outside the windows.
I jumped, and Garrett’s hand tightened on mine as the infected finally surged into motion, swarming the fey.
Panicked, I looked to the right and saw Tor. I slapped on the window to get his attention.
“Don’t let him die,” I called.
Some of the infected heard me. They broke away from the main group and ran at the fey positioned around the trucks. But they had no chance. Two fey quickly beheaded ten.
When I looked toward the barn, very few infected remained upright in the decimated mass of headless bodies. Those who did gave a loud moan then fled just as Garrett had said they would.
Two fey ran after the ones trying to escape.
“Hopefully they won’t get far,” Garrett said.
The truck door opened abruptly, giving me another startle. I looked over at Tor.
“Stay in the truck. We will move the bodies and make sure no heads remain attached. I will tell you when to get out. Merdon says to listen.”
I nodded. The door closed, leaving me inside with Garrett.
“Is it like this every time?” I asked.
“Ryan usually doesn’t hold my hand this long, but pretty much.”
I wrinkled my nose and released my death grip.
“Sorry.”
“Nah, don’t worry about it. Just glad no one noticed. The fey are possessive and jealous, if you didn’t already know.”
“I heard about your near miss with Shax.”
“And Thallirin,” he said. “I don’t know why they keep putting you girls with me. I mean, I don’t mind the company at all. I’m just not a fan of the risk.”
“Oh, come on. It’s not that bad.”
He snorted, watching out the front window.
“I have dreams I’m being carried away without a head, and not because I am infected. I pity any guy who gets between a fey and his crush.”
I followed Garrett’s gaze to where the fey were removing the infected corpses. Then, I looked at the dead cows in front of the truck.
“Do you think there are any animals still alive in the barn?” I asked.
“I do. Why else would they have stood there like that?”
“I don’t know. I’ve just never seen them go after animals. It’s always been people.”
“I hope there weren’t people in there.”
I nodded in agreement and watched the fey haul away the dead cows. Ryan gave the carcasses a lengthy look and shook his head as he walked toward the barn with a large group of fey. They disappeared inside for several long minutes before the group reemerged. They had clearly encountered some infected inside, based on the red on their clothing. Not Ryan, though. He still looked clean as he jogged toward our truck.
Garrett rolled down his window.
“Half the cows are dead, but it looks like a few broke free and are roaming the space behind the barn. There’s a pig pen around back, too. I’m going to try to pull closer to that pen so the fey can carry the cows there and drive them into the back of the truck, all at on
ce.” He raked his hand through his hair. “This is going to be a zoo. Keep your eyes open, and watch your truck.”
Garrett nodded then rolled his window back up. Before he could comment on what he thought of the arrangement, Merdon jogged up to us. Shiny dark bits stuck to his hair. I made a face that had him slowing. Not wanting him to stop, I put my hand on the window again. He continued my way.
“You’re extremely dirty,” I said when he stood next to my door.
“I know.”
I smiled and tapped my hand against the glass.
“You’re also a bossy know-it-all. But I’m glad you’re okay. I heard there’s still some animals alive.”
“Yes. You can come out and see them now. We checked the barn and there are no more infected.”
He stepped back and let Tor open the door for me.
I hopped down and gave them both a grateful smile. Merdon’s gaze swept over me as if checking to make sure I was still in once piece. My stomach dipped at the simple display of how much he cared.
“Stay close, Hannah.”
“I’m sticking to you like glue,” I said before amending, “Well, maybe to Tor like glue. You’re a little gooey for close contact.”
He grunted and looked at Tor.
“Not too close.”
“Told you,” Garrett said from the other side of the truck.
I shook my head at him and hurried after Merdon with Tor close on my heels. Behind us, I heard the other truck doors close and Tasha’s excited whispers.
The gravel, bathed in glistening red, painted the way to the barn’s entrance door. Despite Merdon saying it was safe and having him go first, I still hesitated before advancing into the shadowed underbelly. The scent of manure and silage clogged the air, and I coughed lightly as I entered.
The main area of the barn was far from empty. Dead cattle littered the pen to our left. Based on the pile of infected bodies and the bloody smears on the central aisle, a few of the infected had been inside, waiting for the fey. That or we’d interrupted them killing the cows.
I frowned at the thought.
“Is this where they found the cat?” Tasha whispered.
I glanced back at Uan, who had an arm around the girl’s shoulders in a fatherly, loving gesture that was anything but a casual embrace. His gaze shifted around the space restlessly as he listened to her. He took “protective father” to a whole new level.
