by J. P. Comeau
“I wouldn’t worry about the yoga studio, Crystal. You’ve done one hell of a job so far, and Annie will figure out what to do if you have to be out on maternity leave. There are plenty of other instructors who can step up to the plate, and you know that she wouldn’t want you teaching if you’re not feeling up to par.”
That was the only thing that scared me about being pregnant. I could deal with the weight gains and weird cravings, but I could not function if I was nauseous or had a headache. They were debilitating. I might as well set up shop in bed until I gave birth.
When the timer on my phone went off, I carefully picked the test up and saw two lines.
“Well…” Julianna smiled.
I calmly looked her in the eyes. “It’s positive! I’m pregnant.”
She had a hard time gauging my reaction. It was a combination of shock but also a bit of joy.
Julianna squeezed my hands. “It’s going to be okay, Crystal. You’re going to make an amazing mother, and don’t even worry about the yoga studio. It’s time for some of the other instructors to step up and take on more responsibility. Bethany seems pretty responsible, and Annie will be so happy for you.”
I nodded as a few tears ran down my face. “I’ve always wanted kids, too. I’m just surprised because I was taking precautions, that’s all.”
Julianna rolled her eyes at me. “That’s not foolproof, though. These things happen all of the time. My neighbor said that her daughter got pregnant, despite being on a birth control pill. It’s not that common, but it does happen. Most people don’t tell their boyfriend or husband to put on a condom ‘just in case,’ either.”
“I feel a bit guilty, though. Gavin trusted me to take my pill every day. What if I took it at the wrong time, too late in the day, and that’s why I’m pregnant?”
She shook her head at me. “Remember what we just discussed? Go with the flow, Crystal. That’s all in the past. What’s done is done, and this baby could be the best thing that happens to you. Just think about all of the women in the world who struggle to conceive, sometimes for years on end, and you’ve been blessed with a baby. To make it even better, the father is one of the kindest, most caring men in the world.”
That was one of my other big concerns. “I’m nervous about what Gavin will say, though. Me being pregnant is going to be a huge shock to him, and to top it all off, he’s in Hawaii. He’s also working long days. I don’t even know if Gavin would be a good father.”
Julianna threw her head back and laughed. “Are you kidding me? Gavin seems like he’d be the male equivalent of Mother Theresa. What are you worried about?”
I laughed a little bit, but only to ease my tensions. “Yeah, you’re probably right. I guess it’s just fear of the unknown. I’ll feel better once I tell him.”
My mind kept going back to the conversation we had right before he went to Hawaii. Gavin was right about us being in our honeymoon phase. It had started after we got back from Moldova, and I was terrified that something would ruin what we had.
“Something else is on your mind, Crystal. Spill it.”
“Before he went away on business, Gavin made a joke about us being on our honeymoon and said, ‘thank God we don’t have to deal with kids yet.’ At the time, I just laughed it off, but now that I’m pregnant, I’m starting to worry.”
The look on Julianna’s face only confirmed my fear, but she pulled herself together for my benefit. “That was just a joke, Crystal. How did he say it to you?”
“Well, he came to visit me after meeting with Mr. Truman to say he had to go away for a few months. I was up to my ears in paperwork, complaining about how hard it was to run a yoga studio and couldn’t even think straight. I told him that I was too busy working to spend that much time with him anyway. He joked about what Richard was going through with your sister, and that’s when he made that comment.”
“Then you have nothing to worry about, Crystal. He was just referencing the fact that Annie was dealing with a pulled muscle late in her pregnancy, and Richard had to take care of her. That’s all. If anything, I can see why he’d make that kind of joke.”
I knew Julianna had a valid point, but as I placed my hand over my stomach again, I was still worried about Gavin’s reaction. He was different than any guy I had ever dated, but he was still a guy who may very well freak out and run.
If that were the case, then my life was about to become as stressful as it had ever been. No amount of money could prepare me for being a single mother. My only saving grace would be if Gavin vowed to be with me for the whole pregnancy, and the sooner I told him, the better.
“I’ll tell him when he gets back. Even though I’ll be a few months along at that point, I know he has a lot on his plate in Hawaii. The last thing he needs to worry about is becoming a father.”
22
_____
GAVIN
As my plane touched down in River Valley, I was still surprised that I had pulled it off. I didn’t think that I’d be back so soon. After being sent to Hawaii with the understanding that I’d probably be there for at least three months, if not longer, I had finished everything in less than half the time.
As soon as I had arrived in Hawaii, I drove to the construction site and made sure that everything was running smoothly. The contractors that Mr. Truman hired were more than qualified, and as a result, I reassured him that I didn’t need to be there to oversee all of the developments.
I also negotiated the asking prices for the properties he was looking at and had contracts to buy.
Every seller eventually agreed to my offers, and Mr. Truman couldn’t believe it when I told him. On the flight back home, I had received an email from him, telling me my schedule would be light for the next few months. He wanted me to take some time for myself.
The Uber driver was waiting for me at the airport, so I was back at my mansion in know time. When I walked through the front door, it felt empty without having Crystal inside, or even outside talking to my plants. She didn’t know it, but sometimes I’d sneak away from whatever I was doing to watch her in the garden.
I checked my watch. I wanted to go see if Crystal was still busy at the studio. But it wasn’t long before Richard was knocking on my door. “What, no gifts for your best friend?”
I opened my arms and gave Richard a bear hug. “It’s good to see you, man. How’s everything going with Annie?”
“As well as can be expected. The pregnancy is pretty hard on her, so she’ll be happy once the baby is born. Did you do any site-seeing while you were in Hawaii?”
“Just what I saw at all of the properties the company purchased. It’s beautiful there, though. I can see why Crystal misses calling it her home.”
“It’s a nice place to visit, but I could never call any other place home beside River Valley.”
“Hey, I know you probably eager to see Crystal, but Dad wants to meet with us for a few minutes just to wrap up a few items.”
I followed Richard over to Mr. Truman’s mansion and sat down in his father’s office. “Gavin, I knew you could close this deal. I didn’t know you’d get it done so quickly. I was telling my wife that you were already back in town. She says, ‘hello,’ by the way.”
Richard leaned forward on the desk. “Where is Mom? She was here earlier.”
“Some luncheon, but don’t ask me which one. All I need to know is the size of the check she donates to her favorite causes, and to make sure that it’s not helping one of our competitors.”
I couldn’t help but chuckle. “You have to have a little more faith in your wife than that. I doubt she’d go giving money away to an agency that didn’t agree with your policies.”
He took his glasses off and set them on the desk. “Not on purpose, Gavin. But she gets so caught up in her work. Well, I have to keep my eye on her. A few times, people have taken advantage of her generosity.”
Richard and I waved as we left his office, and I took off for Crystal’s apartment. When I had spoken to
her before I left Hawaii, I was careful not to let it slip that I was packing to leave. I had been a bit worried, though, her voice was cheery, but it felt forced. I couldn’t help but wonder if she was sick. She was always texting me how exhausting it was, working such long hours.
When I arrived, I peeked my head into the yoga studio. The receptionist waved at me and pointed upstairs. I knocked on her door several times before she finally answered. Crystal was wearing oversized sweatpants and a t-shirt, and her hair was completely disheveled. Even though I still found her to be completely adorable, I could tell that something was wrong. There was no color in her cheeks, she looked as though she had been either crying or sweating profusely, and her disposition even seemed a bit off.
Crystal cocked her head, and it was hard to tell if she was happy to see me, at first. “Oh, hey, Gavin! What a surprise! She hugged my neck and we kissed. “You didn’t tell me you were coming home so soon. When did you get in?”
She still seemed so weak. I wanted to pick her up and swing her around, but I was afraid she would break. “I wanted to surprise you, Crystal. You look awful. What’s wrong?”
We walked over to the couch, and I moved the blanket and movies out of the way. Crystal just sat down next to me, nervously rubbing her hands together. She refused to look me in the eyes, which I found alarming.
When she didn’t speak for a few minutes, I had to say something. “Whatever it is, Crystal, please just tell me.”
Her hands began to shake uncontrollably, so I grabbed them and did my best to comfort her. Tears started to stream down her face, and all I could do was watch her cry until she was ready to talk, fearful that she had decided to tell me goodbye now that she had received her settlement.
When she finally composed herself several minutes later, Crystal blurted out what was wrong. “I’m pregnant, Gavin. I’m pregnant.”
Without even realizing it, out of surprise, I let go of her hands, causing them to fall in her lap.
Immediately, I knew it was the worst thing that I could have possibly done.
Crystal’s eyes bugged out at me, shocked that I could have done such a thing. She began crying uncontrollably, and her face was turning beet red as she got up and walked away. I couldn’t believe that I had let go of her hands, but it was the last thing I expected her to tell me. She had taken her birth control pill religiously and never missed her period. How could this have happened?
I kept working to stay composed, reminding myself how focused I had been in front of that Moldovan judge.
I couldn’t focus, no matter how hard I tried. My thoughts were skittering around inside my brain.
Crystal was now bent over crying, her hands clutching her stomach as tears poured onto the floor. She had expected me to be the for her, but the shock of finding out that I was about to become a father was too much for me to process. All of the business training in the world couldn’t have prepared me for that moment. I wanted to close my eyes, but I was worried that I would upset her even more.
So I shook my head and walked over to her, finally getting the courage to comfort her as best as possible.
Crystal pushed me away and continued to cry even harder. I had never seen her upset, and I didn’t know what else I could do.
She put her hands up in the air and just kept shaking her head back and forth, while her whole body began to quiver. She couldn’t even bring herself to speak. Her crying was so intense that at one point, she began to heave, and once again, I tried to help her, only to be shot down. “Go away! Leave me alone! Please just leave me alone…”
I racked my brain to think about what else I could say or do, but I didn’t know how it felt to be a woman. If I had been on the receiving end of what I had just done, I probably would have reacted the same way.
It was killing me inside to see her that upset.
I made one last attempt to calm her down, but she put her hands up in protest and sat on the couch. All I could do was watch as she hung her head and let the tears fall onto the floor. Crystal kept muttering ‘no, no, no,’ and I was unsure if it was about the situation or how I had reacted.
Realizing there was nothing else I could do, I sat back down on the couch and waited for her to speak. I replayed what had just happened in my head, and seeing the look of horror on her face was breaking my heart. I heard her say ‘I’m pregnant’ and then saw her hands falling out of mine.
My reaction told her that I wasn’t ready to be a father.
That was definitely not what Crystal needed to hear.
23
_____
CRYSTAL
I couldn’t believe that Gavin had pulled away from me, just when I needed him the most, he made it abundantly clear that I would have to go about this on my own. My world was falling apart right before my eyes.
Even as Julianna had reassured me that Gavin would be excited about becoming a father, deep down, I knew better. Deep down, I knew he’d freak out and go running for the door, which meant that I’d end up a single mother, just like my mom. After crying hysterically in front of him for several minutes, I stared at Gavin with shock and disbelief while wiping the tears away.
“How dare you, Gavin! Do you think that I did this on purpose or something? Do you have any idea as to what I’ve been through today? I had to sit patiently waiting for some stupid stick that I peed on for fifteen minutes, and the moment you hear ‘pregnant’ you want to run. What kind of man are you, Gavin Tillery?”
He struggled to speak, and I could tell that I was getting through to him.
I wasn’t ready to hear him say anything, though. “My emotions might be all over the place right now, but that doesn’t give you the right to walk away. If you don’t want to be involved with this baby, you know where the door is. Just as my father was never there for me, I guess it’ll be the same for this child. I saw the look in your eyes as soon as you heard the word ‘pregnant.’ I should have known better, too. Julianna kept reassuring me that you’d step up and be a real man, but apparently, you’re just like the rest.”
I felt my anger starting to subside, but it came back as soon as Gavin began to chuckle. I narrowed my eyes at him, and he stopped.
Gavin stood up and opened his arms. After refusing to let him touch me just minutes ago, I understood why he didn’t come closer to me. Something told me to let him hug me, though.
He squeezed me tighter than he ever had before. “Crystal, I was kidding. Remember what I said before leaving for Hawaii, that we weren’t dealing with kids yet? I just thought that we could use a good laugh, that’s all. I never meant to upset you, and I sure as hell don’t plan on going anywhere.” Gavin stepped back and grabbed my hands, squeezing them. “We’re going to have a baby, Crystal. That’s wonderful! And I truly am sorry that I dropped your hands. I told you that I was a bit awkward. Surely, you realized how surprised I was… Just like you apparently were. This is a surprise for both of us. But it doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing!”
I pulled away from him and stared into his eyes. “I don’t know if I believe you, Gavin. Most guys would have reacted the same way that you just did. How can I be so sure? I saw the look in your eyes. You were just as surprised as I was.”
“Why wouldn’t I be surprised, Crystal? You’re on birth control, which I now see isn’t one-hundred percent effective. That’s okay, though. Look, I’m back from Hawaii early, and you’re pregnant. It’s a lot to process right now.”
I looked into Gavin’s eyes to see if he was being truthful, and I was starting to believe him more.
“If I weren’t pregnant, Gavin, would you still be with me?”
Gavin took both of my hands in his again and looked into my eyes. “I love you, Crystal.”
That was the first time he had ever said those words to me.
Part of me believed him, but the other part was still apprehensive. “You’re just saying that because I’m pregnant.”
Once again, he chuckled, this time walking me over to the couch where we
sat down. “I’ve wanted to tell you that for quite some time now. Remember when I was standing in front of that Moldovan judge, trying to convince him that we were married? Everything I said about you was true, down to the moment that I knew I was in love with you. I was just afraid of scaring you away. Please don’t read into what just happened, because I’m not going anywhere.”
I felt myself starting to cry again, but this time it was because I was happy. “I wasn’t expecting you to say that, Gavin. To say I’m shocked would be an understatement.”
He rubbed my hands even harder. “A family is a beautiful thing, Crystal, and I desperately want to have this baby with you. Even though it happened by accident, I’m happy that you’re pregnant. It means that we can move forward in our relationship, which I’ve wanted to do for a while now. I’m going to be there for all of it, too. I'm talking morning sickness, backaches, stomach aches, weird cravings, and anything else that comes up. Whatever you need, I’ll provide it for you. I promise.”
As I wiped the tears away from my eyes, I still needed a little more reassurance. “You need to be one-hundred percent on board with this, Gavin, because this is just the beginning. Who knows what the rest of this pregnancy is going to be like for me. If today is any indicator, I may not be able to work and have to depend on you for more than you’re willing to give. You say that now, but you should have seen me at the studio today.”
“I wish I had been with you at the studio today, and now that you mentioned it, I’m going to speak with Mr. Truman about traveling less.”
There was no way in hell that I wanted him to risk his job. “Are you crazy? By that time, Annie and Julianna will have had their babies, and I’m sure they will look after me.”
Gavin brushed a few hairs out of my face. “Let me worry about Mr. Truman. Besides, they’ve done the same thing for Richard and Annie. He views me like a son, too, so I’m sure he’ll view our baby as his grandchild. I mean it, Crystal. I’m not going anywhere.”
