by Zoe Dawson
She smiled. “Ha. That is so flattering. You are a sweet talker.” She shoved his shoulder, but there was no moving him. “It’s part of my Attila the Hun therapy.”
“Now there’s a flattering picture.”
“Stop it,” she said with a soft, self-deprecating laugh. “You jerk.”
Dragon smiled lopsidedly as the hold on the back of her neck loosened into a caress. “You are tough, SEAL tough.”
“Tougher. I gave birth. I didn’t ring any bell either.”
“Damn you, Jo,” he whispered. He stared at her a minute, his eyes suddenly dark and intent, then as he exhaled sharply, a shudder coursed through him and he pressed her even more fiercely against him. His movements unleashed a storm in Jo that robbed her of all rational thought. Unable to think, she was immobilized by an unbelievable excitement for this man. She tried to move, desperately wanting the moist, hungry contact of his mouth, but Dragon held her motionless.
His breath released in a heated rush. “Damn you,” he said before pressing his mouth against hers. Unable to help herself, her lips softened beneath his seeking mouth, broadcasting to him her surrender, her invitation.
With a soft moan she tangled her fingers in his thick hair, sure he never meant to deepen the kiss. Her resistance to him was so low, she got lost.
“Did you say another swear word, Dragon? Mommy is good at forgiveness kisses.”
Dragon jolted and turned to look down, giving Jo an unobstructed view of Ceri. She was dressed in a white T-shirt with the word “five” in black script under a gold crown and black-and-white striped capri pants, white high-top tennies on her feet. She carried a black sweater. Her hair was still a horrible, adorable mess. Jo’s heart just melted.
She looked at Dragon and her chest got this terrible constriction. His affection for her was written all over him, and caught in the act, he smiled. “She is good at a lot of things,” he said. He seemed so isolated all of a sudden, and she had a need to comfort him.
Right, that’s exactly what had gotten her into trouble.
She had a sneaking suspicion it was going to get her into more hot water.
9
They entered the park at East 65th Street and walked until they got to the zoo. They headed right to the special visiting elephant exhibit, the zoo hosting two of them for a short period of time. Dragon bought peanuts for Ceri, his heart wrapped around the little girl’s pinky. Jo had fitted a white baseball cap on Ceri’s head, and both Dragon and Jo each wore one, his mom in a straw sun hat.
Something had happened when he’d seen Ceri and realized that she was his daughter. His plans, the carefully laid ones where he came to New York, talked to his mom, got her agreeing to return to San Diego with him, had been blown out of the water. He refused to look at the spot his brother had been killed. Everything about his past was buffered behind a thick wall of blurred glass. He knew it was there, but he wouldn’t look too hard to see it. He could go on every day with all of it building like a tidal wave behind that tempered glass and it wouldn’t swamp him. He wouldn’t let it.
But the reality of Ceri and, if he was honest with himself, seeing Jo and rekindling the feelings he’d buried long ago had changed everything. He had no idea what to do with these feelings. He’d never expected to see Jo. No, that was a lie. He had wanted to see her, but he was afraid of showing up on her doorstep and being rejected or worse yet, finding out she’d moved on, and there was no chance for anything second or otherwise. But with every look, every touch, Jo had managed to get behind that brick wall he’d built around his heart to protect himself from more loss, more death.
Withdrawing from his past had been something he’d done for his own sanity. He didn’t want to remember Asahi and how he’d died. He didn’t want to remember the bitterness, the sense of betrayal, the disappointment or the shocking grief that rocked him so hard he feared if he had given in to it, he would have been lost.
But Jo had put large cracks in that wall, and he was lost for a completely different reason. He was feeling things for Jo again that were just as strong as they’d been six years ago. He was so grateful for her big heart. Her understanding and generosity toward him was so comforting. Maybe that’s why he fought so hard against those feelings. From their union, they’d made a child who was their responsibility. The thought weighed heavily on him. The guilt and anger he felt toward himself was worse than anything he’d ever felt in his life. Maybe he felt he didn’t deserve what she offered, but he wanted it like the lifeline it was to a drowning man. He just didn’t understand where they could go from here.
Ceri giggled each time the elephant took a peanut out of her hand. “It tickles, and she’s gentle too.”
That child had wormed her way into his heart as easily as he took his next breath. Tenderness and a fierce protectiveness washed over him as he took in her beautiful smile, the joy she exuded touching him and making his life brighter.
They spent two hours there, looking at the exhibits, going to the domestic petting zoo, and eating lunch, and even as he enjoyed every moment, he struggled with the wall, the cracks and his own failings.
Central Park hadn’t changed much. It still had its lush green grass, the well-maintained walkways, the gurgling fountains. His mom had brought him here when she wasn’t working, but it was mostly to play on the playground.
After the zoo, they were trekking straight down the path to the carousel. Dragon could hear the lively polka music as they approached the spinning merry-go-round. Ceri still had a lot of energy, and she skipped beside them.
What was he going to do? How could he make this work? He kept spiraling around, his SEAL brain looking for a solution. But smashing through this barrier would take more than explosives and a warrior mind-set.
“You all right?” Jo asked, nudging his shoulder with her own, startling him out of his recriminating thoughts.
“Sure, this is great. It’s fun to see her so excited.” He meant every word of it, but Jo was picking up on his inner turmoil. He didn’t want to ruin her day. It was clear she didn’t take much time off.
Dragon went up to the window as Jo was taking her wallet out of her purse and said, “I’ve got it.” He bought the tickets while Ceri tugged on the hem of his sweatshirt.
“Will you ride with me, Dragon?”
“That’s why you brought me along, isn’t it?”
She turned those impish brown eyes on him and grinned. “The princess must have an entourage.”
Dragon’s gaze connected with Jo’s, and somehow, he managed not to laugh as she raised her eyes to the heavens in a beseeching gesture. Dragon forced his face into a deadpan expression. “Yes, I believe she must.” He swept his arm out and said, “After you, Your Highness.”
“You are so kind,” she said as she walked to the now stationary carousel. He chuckled. His darker thoughts fled from the light she radiated. His little girl.
Those words made his heart catch and hold.
“Come on, Dragon,” she said impatiently. “You slow poking man.”
“Yes, ma’am,” he replied, glancing at Jo’s wide smile as his discontent and sense of frustration grew a little. It was a foreign feeling.
Stepping onto the platform, Ceri made a beeline for a galloping cream horse with a gold mane, hooves, and tail, a stylized yellow-and-chocolate saddle with matching tassels across its chest, a mossy green blanket, and chocolate fringe and rump covering with jewels encrusting the hem. “A steed fit for a queen,” he murmured, and she laughed.
“When I grow up, I’ll be a queen.”
She was already the queen of hearts. She had his.
He lifted her up onto the animal, and she beamed at him. “This is the best day ever.”
“It sure is,” he murmured and bent down, kissing her baby-soft cheek. He stood next to her as the music started up and the ride began to move. It was slow at first, and he braced himself against the side of the horse with his arm resting against the back of the saddle and Ceri’s small bod
y, prepared to catch her if she got dislodged or lost her balance.
The platform lurched slightly, and he had to catch his balance. It was then he watched his mom and Jo spin around and around as he passed them. He closed his eyes, a feeling of going nowhere swirling through him. Was he just circling around the same point and finding it hard to move on? Had he been doing that for six years?
When the ride ended, his weakness had him buying her cotton candy and ice cream. They walked toward the lake, and Ceri noticed the boats on the water. “Can we go for a boat ride?” She cast Dragon a sidelong glance. “I bet you can row really good.”
“Well,” Jo said with a smile. “I bet you can too.”
“I’m not afraid of the water,” Ceri said. “Even if I can’t swim.”
Dragon stopped and stared at the three women. “Seriously? You have a Navy SEAL for a son, Mom. Jo…seriously?”
She huffed out a laugh. “I haven’t had time. I was planning on it.”
“That will help her when she gets into water and can’t swim.”
“I know. Hey, you weren’t here to teach her, either, so cut me some slack.”
Her face fell the moment the words were out of her mouth. They stung because she was right. He hadn’t been here. His mom’s sympathetic look only made it worse.
Jo went to touch his arm, and he said, “Why don’t I see about the tickets?” He walked away, needing the distance between them so he could recover from that avalanche.
Ten minutes later they were on the water, and Ceri was cataloging the wild fowl that populated the area.
“Someone did some research before we came to the park,” his mom said. “I’m impressed by your work ethic, Ceri.”
“Work ethic?”
“That’s when you take initiative and do something before someone asks you or you go somewhere prepared.”
Jo kept giving him glances as he pulled at the oars. God, she was so beautiful. Even trying hard to remember everything about her, he’d forgotten. Looking at her, it was hard to believe he’d touched her, kissed her, made love to her and had his body inside hers. He’d never met anyone who affected him the way she did. She wasn’t very big, but she was powerful in a way he’d found strangely daunting and utterly fascinating. She exuded an energy that lit her from within. She was heat, and light, and warmth, and more then he’d ever known of the possibility of love before—and he hardly knew her at all.
“Oh, ducks and we don’t have a thing to feed them.”
Dragon pulled in the oars and reached for her small backpack. He unzipped it and pulled out a bag of oats.
She clapped her hands and reached for it. He felt ten feet tall.
“What do you say, Ceri?” Jo admonished.
“Oh, sorry. Thank you, Dad.”
All three of them froze, and Jo looked like a wild, trapped animal.
“Oh, sugar. It slipped out. But I know he’s my dad.” Her bottom lip fattened up and started to tremble. “I really want a dad. Dragon said to wait to talk to you. But I don’t want to wait. I waited already. Everyone has a dad at school. I want a dad.” She looked at Gen, tears filling her almond shaped eyes. “That makes you my grandmother…doesn’t it?” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “It feels like Christmas.”
His mom was already blubbering, and Jo was a close third. She opened her arms and Ceri rose to go to her, but when the boat rocked, Dragon reached out and hauled her across his lap so that she wouldn’t upset the balance of the boat. His mom closed her arms around Ceri.
“I’ve never been so happy in my life to find out you’re my granddaughter. In Japanese I’m your obaasan, sometimes shortened to baasan or baa-baa.”
“I love it. I’m going to call you baa-baa. Is that okay?”
“Yes, my precious. I love it too.”
Jo sighed and wiped at her face. She took Ceri’s shoulders and said, “Yes, he’s your father, but it’s a long story and we’ve got to get going back home so I can make dinner and you can get to bed at a decent hour. So we’ll talk about this later. All right?”
Ceri nodded and then her arms were around his neck. “I wasn’t wrong. You are an amazing dad.”
He almost made it four bawlers. Nothing had ever hit him so hard, meant so damn much as those sweet words. He’d never been this wiped out by someone who didn’t even come to his waist, but she was damn good at kneecapping him.
“Get in the back, troublemaker,” he said gruffly.
“What do they say? The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. A chip off the old block. Like father, like daughter.” Ceri lifted her chin. “I read somewhere the Navy pays you to be a troublemaker. So sounds to me like it could be a good way to make a living.”
“I have another saying,” Jo said. “Someone is pretty big for her britches.”
Undeterred, Ceri giggled, then cut it off as Jo frowned. She went to the stern of the boat and happily fed the ducks. A deep rumble thundered across the park to the east.
Jo sat up straighter. The wind had come up, and it was getting chilly. “Was that thunder? I didn’t think it was going to rain today.”
“Weather isn’t a science,” Gen said.
“No, I guess not. We better head back before we get drenched,” she said as the sky started to darken. It was an hour before the sun went down, and dusk was the cutoff for the boat rental.
Dragon turned the bow and started to head toward shore as the clouds really started to roll in. “We’re not going to make it,” he said as raindrops started making tiny ripples in the water and hitting his face.
The air got murky, lightning dancing on the edges of the thick thunderheads. Then the skies opened up, a silver sheet that made it damned impossible to see, but he forged ahead. Over the din of the rain, he heard voices, then laughter. He was rowing fast now as his mom and Jo huddled together. The bottom of the boat was wet and so were their feet.
Then out of the murk, a boat emerged, four teenagers inside, obviously either drunk or high. One of them was standing with his back to the bow. There was no way for Dragon to miss them. The bow hit, and the abrupt stop threw the standing teenager off. He hit the bow of Dragon’s boat, ejecting Ceri into the water.
Dragon turned at her cry of fear and the splash. Thank God she was wearing a life preserver. He pulled in the oars as the boy and Ceri thrashed in the water. He stood without thinking, his movement rote. He pulled off his shoes and dropped them, then dove over the side and swam to her.
He could hear his mom’s frantic calls but couldn’t make out what she was saying as he reached Ceri. Her arms wrapped tightly around his neck, her panic showing in her wide, frightened eyes.
“I’ve got you. You’re okay. Ceri, loosen your hold. You need to calm down. Take deep breaths. I’ll take you back to the boat.”
“Why don’t you look where you’re going, dude!” one of the miscreants shouted as they pulled their friend into the boat. As he swam to their boat, his mom was gesturing wildly. When he reached the boat, Gen went carefully to her knees, grabbing Ceri.
Dragon grabbed the back of Ceri’s pants and with one jerk of his arm, she was back into the boat.
“She’s in the water! Oh, God, Ryuu, she hasn’t come up.”
“What?” He looked around and sure enough, Jo wasn’t treading water.
“You’ve got to find her.”
Ceri screamed, “Mommy!”
Fear, a paralyzing cold, iced through him. The kind of fear he’d only felt once. When his brother was lying in his arms dying. But this fear had form and sound as it roared in his ears and sat on him like a weight. Not even in combat had he experienced anything like the fear that gripped him.
He couldn’t lose Jo.
Then, his training kicked in and his breathing slowed, and he calmed himself down, pushed the fear aside and did what he needed to do to save her.
He dove down into the shadowy murk. His eyes searched for Jo, but he saw nothing but silver, black and gray. Then the clouds broke as the rain slowed and
a sliver of light illuminated the water. Something shimmered, and he noted the location, then rose to the surface. Taking in great inhalations of air as his mom and Ceri screamed at him, he ducked below the surface, gathered his strength and swam full out toward the spark he’d seen. He looked around, then down, and saw Jo, slipping deeper, her white shirt like a beacon.
He went after her, pulling strong strokes, thankful for his experience in water, thankful his training propelled his body to act because his mind was a serious mess.
He reached her, snagged her shirt and pulled her unconscious body to him, and using his strong leg muscles, he headed for the surface, his lungs burning.
Breaking the surface, he got Jo into a swimmer’s hold and stroked toward the boat. As he got there, he said, “She’s still out. Can you help me, Mom?”
“You bet your ass I can.”
“I will give you a million forgiveness kisses, Baa-baa,” Ceri said, her voice watery and hoarse.
Dragon treaded water, his legs pumping as he held on to the side of the boat and set his palm into the center of Jo’s back. Gritting his teeth, his muscles bulging, he lifted her high enough to get her over the lip as his mom and Ceri reached out to drag her into the boat.
“Mom. You’ll need to balance the weight before I can get back in. Go to the stern. His mom complied, and Ceri knelt down to Jo.
“Mommy. Wake up. Please wake up. Are you okay?” Her teeth were chattering and her body shaking as she patted her cheeks. “Please, Mommy.”
Dragon was careful as he pulled himself up and over the lip of the boat and immediately moved to Jo’s side. She had a pulse, but she wasn’t breathing. He rolled her to the side to get the water out of her mouth and started rescue breaths. One… Two… Three… Four… Jo gasped. Dragon rolled her again as she exhaled water, breathed deeply, and exhaled water again. She groaned. It was the most beautiful sound he’d ever heard.
Kneeling, he pulled her into his arms. “Babe?” he said, pushing her sopping hair out of her eyes. Her body relaxed into his embrace. His mom was already at the oars, and she was strongly rowing them toward the boat house.
