She tried lowering her gaze again, but Paul lifted her chin. He so desperately wanted to kiss her—to taste the sweetness he dreamed of every night since he left. “Rachel, you captured my heart, but you deserved so much better than anything I could offer you. A life of pain, of never being accepted from my family, my friends.” Looking at her now, he knew he had hurt her worse than any of his family ever could.
“You didn't give me a chance.” Something deeper than uncertainty flickered in her eyes. And then she laughed. She was angry, but only a little. And that gave him hope. “That didn’t matter to me. I just wanted you.” She lowered her lashes and fresh tears dripped onto her shirt.
The thought of leaving her again felt like a knife in his side. “There wasn’t an hour in each day I didn’t think of you. When I visited last month, my aunt told me my parents weren’t Amish. My parents were Englischers.”
She pulled away and looked into his eyes. Her baffled expression slowly slipped away as the truth clarified her confusion.
“I wanted to talk to you so badly. I went to your house and saw your lantern. I was so close to pulling in your driveway, but then I saw you standing in the yard with Jordan. I knew you could find happiness with him. From the beginning, I knew how he felt for you.”
“Paul …”
“I left with no intention of ever returning. I couldn't. Knowing I could never hurt you again and knowing how it would hurt seeing you with him or anybody else. I hated myself everyday for leaving, for not standing up for you. For us. And then you were there ... in Ocean City.”
Rachel’s eyes brightened for the first time since he'd arrived. “It was you?” Her head tilted to the side. “I thought I was going crazy, that it was my imagination. You were looking right at me. Then I turned and you were gone.” She searched his face for more answers.
He drew her close, and her body trembled against his. She stayed in his arms allowing him to hold her. Touching her was something he’d only dared dream about. It felt too good to be real.
“So, you aren’t Amish? What does that mean?”
He pulled free the strands of hair sticking to her face. “It means I'm also an Englischer by birth.” He thought he’d gotten through to her, but then her expression fell. “I left on my own to start a new life.”
She pulled away. “What about Anna?”
“Anna was never anything more than a friend. But that wasn't good enough for her. When she threatened me, I didn't think I had any other choice but to leave.”
She looked past him for a long moment. When her gaze met his again, confusion smoldered in those trusting brown eyes. “I thought you were together.”
“Nein.”
The confused depths of brown narrowed. “But she was the reason you left?”
Paul ran his fingers through the hair on this chin. “Only because she threatened to show the compromising pictures she took of us.” Her expression was torn and she shook her head. “You were barely covered with that blanket.”
“She saw us at the waterfall and took pictures?”
“She saw everything and, yes, she threatened to show everyone.”
Rachel gasped. “Wow!” He could almost picture her questions being answered. One by one. “I can't believe she did that.”
“I left to protect you and your reputation, but I was wrong.” He kissed her forehead and whispered into her hair. “I should've stayed.”
She looked up at him with her beautiful face, broken from the pain he'd caused her. “You’re staying in Hershey?”
Paul shuddered as he thought of the moment he had left her behind. “I was thinking about moving back here, to Paradise.”
Her eyes were wild from a mixture of excitement and fear as her gaze roamed the assortment of potted plants. “So you can help me take care of the flowers?”
“So I can take care of you.” He took gentle hold of her face. “There was one more thing I wanted to ask you.” If ever he wondered whether God was calling him back to Paradise, to Rachel, he no longer had any doubt. Not even one. “Do you have a date for prom?”
“What?”
The genuine surprise in her voice soothed his reservations. “Your senior prom. Tomorrow night?”
She shifted uncomfortably. “I wasn't going.”
He reached into the bed of his truck toward the row of vincas and pulled out the hidden white corsage wrapped with silver ribbon. “Can I take you to your prom?”
There was no response, only a happy gasp. In a matter of seconds, she was in his arms, and he held her. Then he released her just enough to meet her gaze and tenderly pressed his lips against hers. In those treasured moments, all the love they’d kept bottled up escaped into a whirlwind of life.
50
Rain fell relentlessly as Rachel and Kelli spent hours upstairs styling hair, applying make-up, and painting finger and toenails.
It wasn't until the girls presented themselves to their dates that the sun finally adorned the gray sky.
Paul Fischer, dressed in a black tux and black bowtie, stood just below, facing her, his mouth slightly agape. His gaze seemed to drink her in from the moment their eyes met and Rachel's heart fluttered so swiftly, she felt light-headed.
She took the steps toward him carefully, her knee length, black dress swaying with each stride. Her pulse was leaping all over the place. Paul was truly here, truly escorting her to senior prom.
The night was like a dream. Stringed lights dimly brightened the auditorium, creating a glimmer in Paul's eyes. He spun her from one dance to the next in a way that stole her breath and made her eager to spend countless tomorrows together.
“I didn't know you knew how to dance.”
He pulled her closer, his breath warming her cheek. “I didn't either.”
A laugh of unattainable joy ripped from her at the promise of answered prayers and priceless treasures. Her heart and soul were infused with peace that she would find contentment in every memory, every blessing, and every new beginning.
She no longer had to chase paradise to find happiness. Because she had found something she'd never expected to find, something only God could give her.
A place to begin, to create, to live her life to the fullest one day at a time.
The End
Acknowledgments
Dreams in my world are vivid. Thank you to everyone who encouraged, blessed, and helped make this dream a reality. Every time you ask me when will the next book will be out, it's a huge boost of confirmation. Saying thank you doesn't seem like enough.
Every single reader is so valuable. You are the reason I'm on this wild and crazy and exciting journey and you make every moment worthwhile. I wouldn't be here without you.
Thank you to my husband, Rocky, for being so supportive as I spend countless hours on the computer and for always believing in me.
My children Tyler, Zachary, and Brooklyn for loving me through it all.
My editor, April Gardner, for answering all my questions and excusing the weird way I put question marks in the wrong place, even though I know the difference between a statement and question. April, thank you for helping to make this baby shine.
My critique partners who labored over chapter after chapter. I've learned so much from each and every one of you.
And most importantly, thank you, Jesus, for without you, none of this would be possible.
About the Author
Cindy Patterson believes in life changing fiction and happily ever afters that start with Jesus. Her passions include Jesus, her husband, and her family. She's an ordinary girl wanting to do extraordinary things for Christ. In her stories, she loves to give glimpses of how God can use brokenness and make them whole. Her favorite pastimes are spending time with her family, reading, and writing. She reads a lot, drinks too much coffee, and wishes she had more time to write. She loves to connect with her readers and you can find her at cindypattersonbks.com.
Discussion Questions
1.Rachel had to leave her childhoo
d home the summer before her senior year of high school. Do you believe her reaction to the news and her attitude along the way were as expected? What do you think you would have done in this situation?
2. Paul’s relationship with his uncle was strained and Paul’s decision to not work on the farm added more tension. Do you believe Paul was wrong to pursue his dream of construction work instead of helping his uncle on the farm, especially when his uncle had provided him a home for most of his life?
3. What did you think about Paul’s initial reaction to Rachel? Do you believe his previous encounters with Englisher’s affected his perception of her? Or was it the unexpected attraction drawing him to her that clouded his thinking?
4. Who was your favorite character(s)? Why?
5. Who was your least favorite character(s)? Why?
6. Do you believe the book’s title was fitting to the story? If so, how does it relate to the contents of the story?
7. Paul’s decision to protect Rachel’s reputation came at a high cost. Do you agree with his decision, or do you believe he should have taken his chances with Anna’s threat? How would you have responded if you were in a similar situation?
8. Rachel wanted to trust God to heal her broken heart, but it wasn’t easy giving up on what she really wanted. Has there been a time when you prayed for something, but God didn’t give you the answer you were hoping for? What did you learn from it?
Broken Butterfly
Mallory Scott trusts no one. At twenty-two, she's in a battle for her life. Living in a women's shelter after finally escaping an abusive relationship, the only thing Mallory is focused on is staying safe. But when he finds her again, Mallory must flee the shelter in the middle of the night and rely on the kindness of a stranger to help her create a new life for herself in Paradise, Pennsylvania, far away from everything she knows.
Eric Matthews has what every man wants: a successful job and beautiful new girlfriend. Unfortunately, it seems he is living for everyone else but himself. But when chance leads a mysterious woman to appear in his life, his world is suddenly thrown off its axis. Mallory wants nothing to do with him, and he is determined to find out why. Attracted to the one man she thinks she can never have, Mallory battles with her heart's deepest desires. Her barriers slowly break down until jealousy flares--revealing her haunted past. As destiny remains just within reach, only time will tell if a shocking scheme will separate Mallory and Eric forever.
In this compelling inspirational romance, the past intertwines with the present as a woman searches for the truth that will finally set her free.
Broken Butterfly~One
Charlotte, North Carolina
Pounding echoed through the women’s shelter.
Mallory Scott froze, one hand submerged in soapy, dish water. She glanced, unable to stop herself. The door was locked, bolted shut.
Jake couldn’t know she was here.
Unwilling to take the risk, she hurried down the back hallway and into the bathroom. She fumbled with the lock and closed her eyes when the latch snapped. Panic crushed her torso, making it impossible to take a full breath.
The banging stopped. Her legs gave out and she slid to the floor as the sound of an unfamiliar male voice resounded through the wall separating the bathroom and den. Pine cleaner and moldy grime saturated her lungs. Part sob, part cough escaped her throat.
The voices in the next room grew louder. “It was Mr. Thomas across the street complaining about the trash container not being moved back. “Whose week is it?”
Mallory pulled herself up onto shaky knees and flushed the empty toilet. The tense atmosphere of the two story house never changed.
The tightness in her stomach eased. It hadn’t been Jake. The terror had passed, for now, but would it ever be over? How could she expect anything different? She couldn’t. Not when she was doing the only thing she could. Run.
“You can finish the breakfast dishes now, Mallory.” The house mother’s frustrated voice echoed through the dark, paneled walls.
Mallory left the safety of the bathroom and moved toward the front door. “It’s my week.” It didn’t matter that it wasn’t, that it was actually Bonnie’s turn. She’d take the blame before someone else was forced to.
She moved outside to the warmth of the morning sun. Fighting the urge to run and cover her face, she walked with steady movements. Each step was calm, composed and contradicting the fierce battle raging in her chest that didn’t ease until she found her place at the kitchen sink.
Stephanie, her housemate, wiped the table. “Hey, don’t let Bonnie get to you. She’s been grouchy all day.”
“It’s okay.” Mallory finished scrubbing caked-on grease from the frying pan. “I just freaked.”
Bonnie couldn’t help her short fuse. Watching her child suffer to the point of death at the hands of a man she chose to stay with had to haunt her every minute, her every second. How could Mallory feel anything but sympathy for the woman?
Stephanie placed a thin, cool hand on her shoulder. “You’re only twenty-two. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you. It won’t be long and you’ll be out of here.”
After securing the last few bread crumbs scattered across the counter with the ragged dish rag, she rinsed the cloth and set it out to dry. At least I’m safe.
Living in the women’s shelter weighed on every ounce of sanity Mallory had left.
There had to be an escape. She had to believe that.
* * *
Paradise, Pennsylvania
Eric Matthews stepped into the kitchen and inhaled the spices of simmering sausage. He grabbed a cup of coffee from the counter. “Are you expecting guests this morning, Mother?”
She lifted a casserole from the oven and faced him, her hazel eyes deep in thought. Her dark, gray streaked curls lay perfectly across her head. “No, but that’s exactly what I should do. Mr. Chamberlain’s sister has moved into the mansion. I should plan a brunch.” Her smile widened. “Her daughter, Victoria, moved in as well. You have to introduce yourself. A handsome young man like you would be quite the catch.” She set the glass dish on the table and straightened his collar. “You should be settling down. Of course, Victoria’s unmarried if she’s still staying with her mother.”
The grim twist of his mouth went unnoticed. Being the niece of the most prominent man in Lancaster County didn’t matter to him. To his mother, status was the most important thing. His stomach churned as he thought of the man—of the meeting that could change everything.
“I’m sure I’ll run into her sooner or later,” he told her, though he didn’t plan to play his mother’s match-making games. He finished his last bite and hid a smile. If he let his lips relax the slightest bit, he’d blurt his true feelings. Standing to leave, he kept his gaze averted, avoiding the delighted stare she’d give him if she found out he was heading to the Chamberlain mansion.
Eric grabbed his briefcase, climbed into his Silverado, and adjusted the air control. He drove through the long, winding roads of Paradise, Pennsylvania. Two Amish children, standing by a barn, waved as he passed. Deep in thought, he almost missed their bright smiles.
He’d already met with Mr. Chamberlain twice, but today would determine whether he’d be awarded the children’s home project. After slowing for a horse and buggy, he turned onto Stragsburg Road.
He arrived at the mansion and tucked the drawings under his arm. Climbing the steps leading to the front, he rang the bell and turned toward the driveway. Spring flowers sprinkled with early-morning dew surrounded the concrete fountain. A butterfly wove in and around the colorful rows of plants, her blue wings gleaming against the sunlight.
Sebastian opened the door. “Mr. Matthews, Mr. Chamberlain is expecting you. You’re a few minutes early. Can I offer you some refreshment while you wait?”
“No, thank you.” Eric rubbed a hand across his belly, the starched shirt stiff beneath his fingers. “I had a large breakfast.”
“I’ll let Mr. Chamberlain know you’
ve arrived.”
“Thank you.” Eric took a seat on the foyer bench. He studied the stair rail cascading down from the balcony. Dark, high heeled shoes sparkled from the top of the stairway. His eyes followed the slim, curvy figure moving with slow, assured steps. Dark blue jeans separated the slender waist line and tight pink turtleneck. Long, wavy hair tumbled down both shoulders.
He stood. Was that Victoria?
Allowing a few strands of hair to drift through her fingers, she locked her gaze with his. Against her deep tan, her blue eyes sparkled like sapphires. “Hi, I’m Victoria.”
The scent of coconut and flowers filled the space between them. “Nice to meet you.” He took her hand, the pink, manicured nails glimmering under the sky light. “Eric Matthews.”
“Well, Eric Matthews, you’ll have to show me around. It’s easy to get lost on these back roads.” She twisted the diamond pendant hanging below her neck line. “Though thanks to you, Lancaster County suddenly looks more interesting.” Victoria turned and flipped her hair over one slender shoulder as she disappeared around the corner.
His mind whirled as Mr. Chamberlain walked from his office and cleared his throat. “Mr. Matthews?”
Eric took his offered hand. “Mr. Chamberlain.” He grabbed his briefcase and followed the older gentleman into his office. With the image of Victoria smoldering in his mind, Eric removed his financial projections from the folder and set them on the table. Mr. Chamberlain unrolled the prints and examined the drawings.
Grasping the desk’s edge with both hands, the man leaned forward. “This is interesting. I like your concept.”
“I added two rooms with the extra square footage.” Pointing at the corner section of the sketch, Eric’s chest swelled with thoughts of the orphans. “I designed a teenager’s retreat with an outside door that leads to a gazebo.” His breathing quickened. He had to make this work. Not only for him, but for them. “And here a similar place for the preteens.”
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