I know that the twins want their territory back and they might be willing to do anything in order to be in power again. I can be a bad guy, sneak into Rudolf’s surroundings and do what’s necessary. He is keeping her somewhere in the city. I’m certain that he hasn’t left yet. Things in Braxton are not going well for him and his people are slowly choosing the other side.
“We have our channels, Micah. We will get in touch within a couple of hours with a location. You need to be there, and one of my associates will give you more details,” Ivan finally says, rising like this is the end of this discussion. I’m baffled, knowing that this whole thing was just too easy. I’m smart enough to keep my mouth shut and not question him further when we start walking back to the bar. Tequila looks flustered and pissed off. She is sitting close to a tall Russian that was supposed to buy them a drink. Kiki has a disturbing look on her face. I sense trouble; something big is just about to go down.
“Did you make a deal with him, yes?” asks Dmitri, and he drinks a shot of vodka. The brothers nod. “Good, so our boy won’t mind if I borrow the taller one. She is feisty.”
“I do mind. We need to get going, and both girls must go back with me,” I say, more forcefully that I want, taking a step towards her.
“We will keep her with us until you bring us Rudolf’s head. She is going to be our guarantee that you won’t screw us over,” Ivan barks, smiling widely like this is the best day of his life, eyeing Tequila with twisted excitement. Kiki gets off the chair and I start to sweat, thinking fast about my options. The new guy is caressing Tequila’s back, holding her wrists.
“Kiki, let’s go,” I snap at the younger girl. Tequila shoots me a terrified look, but I’m already turning around. I hear a muted cry for help behind me and then I pull out the gun, turning back abruptly. It’s a trick that I learnt from an old instructor years ago. Both brothers reach out for their guns at the same time, but they are too late. I can easily shoot Dimitri straight in the head right now. He is getting on my nerves, taking what doesn’t belong to him. The tiny voice in my head reminds me that I’m not a murderer.
“I won’t hesitate to put a bullet into his head. Both girls are coming with me and this is not negotiable,” I say, through gritted teeth, knowing that they can have me dead in a matter of seconds. They have nothing to lose. I came to them, not the other way around.
I imagine having that sick bastard Rudolf in front of me. He needs to suffer the same way that Tahlia suffered, and then I might let him die. My career with the force is over, but I no longer care, as long as I have Tahlia.
“Micah, I can shoot you right now, and then we will get the girls anyway,” Ivan says, piercing me with his crystal blue eyes. Only now in this light I notice the scar that runs over the side of his face.
“But then you won’t get Rudolf. We both know that you want him eliminated. I’m the man for the job. I’m Joe Bloke, no one that he cares about, but I want him dead. I dream about it every day,” I say, pressing the trigger lightly. Tequila stops breathing; her eyes are wide, almost scary.
Kiki keeps moving closer to me, inch by inch, for the first time keeping her mouth shut.
“Shoot him, Ivan. What are you waiting for? I want this whore,” shouts Dmitri. He must be important or he is one of Ivan’s closest guys. There is no way I’ll let him get his hands on Tequila. I’m ready to blow up his head if he touches her again.
Ivan hesitates for a good few seconds then he lowers his gun. I move closer to the bar and grab Tequila’s wrist, dragging her over me, not taking my eyes off both brothers.
“You give me the location and I’ll bring you his head. I’m a man of my word,” I say and lower the gun. Then I punch Dmitri straight in the face as hard as I can, and feel like the bones in my knuckles almost crack. He flies backward over the bar, landing on a chair. Tequila lets go of a small yelp. The two Russians seem dumbfounded, staring at me in shock. “I would never imagine you would disrespect a business arrangement. That is for messing with what’s mine.”
Ivan nods his ascent and I decide to leave speedily. I don’t wait to see what Ivan and Vladimir might do. I simply turn around and start walking away, dragging Tequila with me. Kiki is strolling after us, breathing like she’s having an asthma attack.
“What did you do, Micah? What the hell did you promise them?” Tequila hisses once we get outside.
“Rudolf’s head for his location. Don’t worry, I’ll get tremendous satisfaction from ending his life.”
Chapter Sixteen
Janine Morgan
I wake up in the morning and check the time on my crappy phone. It looks like I managed to sleep for twelve straight hours without interruption. Unfortunately, my muscles are aching. I was on my feet all day yesterday and I’ll be feeling it all day today. A few seconds later I hear some argument outside on the corridor; a man is shouting at his wife. Apparently she bought him the wrong size shirt for some meeting that he has this morning. My life would be so much easier if I had these kinds of problems.
I close my eyes again, taking some time to think about the day ahead. I’m alone and so far no one knows that I stabbed Tahir and ran off. Maybe he is still lying there in the pool of blood, most likely already dead.
After so many years of being afraid and pretending to be someone else, I’m done. I’m tired of running. Lee was willing to sell me, but after yesterday that abused and scared Rose Waltham has passed away. Tahlia Sanderson has survived. She was winning at one point, but lost it all when the love of her life betrayed her. There is no point dwelling on what happened. The fact is that Micah and Tahlia will never be together. There has been too much damage. She will never stop loving him, but it’s much easier this way, being away from him and her old life.
I get dressed, brush my dark hair, put the glasses on. I decide to go out, see what London has on offer. First things first, I head over to the shopping centre and buy three sharp knives. The guy that sells them to me doesn’t seem surprised or even curious why I want to be armed. Two small ones and one large enough to kill a man. People die all the time, but sometimes not the right kind of people. When I woke up alone in that posh apartment, I wasn’t ready. This time I will be. The rat won’t rest until I’m his slave again, but he doesn’t realise that I have changed, that I’m not going to be intimidated by my past.
The police are still looking for me, so I need to be careful. Rat might be back in London already, who knows? If he is looking for me, I’ll make this easy for him, which means that I have to find him before he finds me.
There is one place where I can start. When he still had power over me he kept talking about this one particular club in Tottenham. He knew a lot of people there. It’s a huge risk, but it’s time to take matters into my own hands. Police won’t protect me. No one can.
I feel like a stranger walking around the city, passing other people, knowing that anyone could still recognise me. I walk into a few shops and buy some more clothes, all with cash. Then I grab some food and several hours later I get back to the hotel, feeling less achy. I need to let other people know that I’m not hiding anymore, so the word will get to him eventually and then he will come for me. Despite the abuse that rat put me through, I have learned something from him. I learnt that even no one can become someone.
I hear the door and walk quickly to the kitchen, pretending that I’m cooking food for him. My cheek is still swollen from yesterday. He hit me because Connor left pizza on the table in the living room. Josh hates when I don’t keep his new place clean.
Micah is gone; he left his parents and everyone else, when that detective closed Steph’s case for good. I cried a little in my sleep when I overheard Josh talking about him with one of his guys. Now I’m alone, left with this terrible secret. No one will ever know what happened that night, not even Micah.
Josh told his mother a couple of weeks ago that he was moving out. He asked me to pack his things into the van and said don’t ask questions. I was so happy that we were going to b
e together until I discovered that two of his mates moved in with us too.
I keep telling myself that he is under a lot of pressure. He is trying to establish his name on the market, move large quantities of weed. I don’t even remember the last time he kissed me. Most of the time he forces himself on me and pushes me so hard into the pillow I can’t breathe. I thought about running away, but I have no idea where I can go. My siblings were taken away a couple of weeks ago and my mother’s house would be the first place where Josh would look. I can’t go there.
“Rose, what the fuck are you doing here?” he asks, walking into the kitchen. I jump; I’ve been doing that more often than usual. Any goodness that was ever in Josh is long gone. I don’t mean anything to him anymore. He keeps treating me like I’m his servant.
“I’m making you something to eat. Are you hungry?” I ask, holding my hands together, so he can’t see that I’m shaking.
He walks up to me and grabs my hair. He stinks of buzz, which means that he won’t leave me alone tonight. I force myself to be quiet. When I make a noise he seems to hurt me more.
“I had food, you stupid bitch. I have other work for you to do,” he whispers and pushes me away, so I hit the cupboard, brushing my knee. Tears swell up in my eyes, but I force them down. Josh doesn’t care anymore and he doesn’t like crying.
“What do you want me to do?” I ask, trying to breathe and think about school. It was the only time when I could look at Micah, the only time when I didn’t have to worry about my hungry siblings or my crack head mother.
“I have something for you.” He shrugs, pointing at the black suitcase on the table, filled with small bags with white powder. Cocaine. I recognise that drug instantly. Fear clogs my throat, when I bring back memories of my own mother lying on the floor, covered with vomit.
“You are looking at a hundred thousand pounds worth of drugs here. I have been promoted. The boss wants me to get rid of it as soon as possible,” Josh says, sounding proud of himself, embracing me with his large arms. I noticed that his body had changed shape. No longer a teen, it’s filled out into a man’s body. And he has been working out every day—and every day he is more violent towards me.
For some reason I can’t respond to him. I just stand there staring at the drugs, unable to comprehend how this whole thing had gone so wrong for me. A couple of months ago Josh was just a nice guy, the guy that paid attention to me.
“You are going to take a couple of pounds and sell it. You will have the addresses that this stuff needs to be delivered to,” he says, tightening his grip around my arms.
“I’m just a girl. Maybe you should let someone else do this,” I say, before I have time to think about what is actually coming out of my mouth. Josh grabs me and slaps me, so I fall on the floor. My head feels fuzzy and for a split second I have no idea what happened.
When I look up, I see him packing some white powder into smaller bags. There is a warm liquid in my mouth and my tooth is moving. The bastard hit me again.
“Don’t fucking question me. I own you, Rosie, don’t you get it? I give you the roof over your head and food on the table. I own you, and you’re going to do exactly what I say. Do you fucking understand me?” He leans over and runs his thumb over my cheek, almost lovingly, but the look in his eyes tells a different story. The pain in my head keeps mounting; my whole body pulsates with anger and humiliation. It finally clicks into my brain that if I stay with him, he will kill me.
“Yes,” I crack, spitting blood everywhere. He pushes the bag into my hands and grabs me by my hair again.
“Everything is in the bag. Get it done today and bring me the cash. You are going to work for your living from now on,” he says, almost tearing my hair away from my head. “You belong to me, so think twice before you even consider screwing me over and running away with that money, Rosie. I can forget about what we had, and find your siblings. It would be a shame to scar their pretty faces.”
Back then Josh used violence and intimidation to control me. I was petrified of him, of the fact that I became his little pet. That day I became not only his servant, but also his drug dealer. I was trapped, lost in a new life filled with violence and abuse.
Every day I was coming home with bags full of money, and every day I considered running away. That was my only chance, my only way to break the cycle, but I was too petrified to even try it. I knew that if I ran, he would hurt my little brother and sister. Then he would hunt me down until he found me. He murdered Micah’s girlfriend, just because he was jealous. I couldn’t even imagine what he would do to me if I betrayed him.
When Josh started dealing with hard drugs, this is when things went from bad to worse in a matter of days. Josh was supplied with more drugs on a daily basis and each day I was running around the city, delivering his drugs to his customers. I had blisters all over my feet. Back then it seemed that there was never an end to my new life.
One day a rugged tattoo guy refused to pay me, and when I came back home short, Josh broke my wrists. After he left me lying on the floor screaming in agony, he disappeared for a good few hours. Jason took me to the hospital, and when I came back, Josh was sitting in a chair watching TV and all his clothes were covered with blood. That was the first night I didn’t sleep until the following morning, wondering if I’d wake up alive the next day.
I shake myself back to reality, knowing that there is no point bringing this kind of crap up now. Josh needs to pay for what he’s done to me and this time I won’t let him bully me. I put the black dress on and then stare at myself in the small mirror in the bathroom. The money that I stole from that betting shop will run out at some point. That’s why I need to start earning. The dress is short enough to bring enough attention to myself. I might have to act like a slut for a night in order to get a job.
There is no time to think about logistics. I need to get to that club and find out if the regulars from Rudolf’s time in London are still there. Not many people know that rat is alive, that he faked his own death in order to get the police off his back.
I’m wearing a lot of heavy makeup. I put the black glasses on and a leather jacket that I bought. I don’t feel like myself and that’s the point. I’m someone completely different, a new me. After sorting out the subway tickets, I take the tube to Tottenham. It’s just after seven in the evening. It’s strange how money has changed me. I kept telling myself that Braxton was the best thing that ever happened to me, but now I’m not sure. Micah failed to recognise me, and then he used me to get what he wanted. Now I have my freedom and confidence back. The rat will never get me, and if he does, I’ll kill him before he touches me again.
It’s Saturday night, which means the club should be filled with all sorts of scumbags and guys that are looking to have a good time. A cold shiver crawls down my spine when I think what I’m about to do. Rose Waltham was anxious about everything; she nearly lost it when she had to speak to the shrink. She is questioning if I’m really ready to do absolutely anything in order to free myself, in order to bring rat down. She questions my ability, telling me to turn around and get back to the hotel room, that I’m too weak to fight him. Micah might be out there, searching for me. That’s too bad, because he can’t help me. I need to do this on my own.
I slap myself hard then, and after a moment the voices in my head are gone.
Half an hour later I walk into the club filled with crowds of people. The whole place smells of booze mixed with sweat, not a great combination.
For a several minutes I just stand around and watch what’s going on. Men in black suits and men in casual clothes are hanging around, staring at the crowd on the dance floor, sipping their drinks. Some of them glance at me, some don’t even bother. There are a lot of pretty girls around, and they are wearing next to nothing. When the alcohol starts coursing through my veins and I’m done with watching people, I approach the waitress with large boobs, ready to change my destiny.
“Hey, is there any chance that I can speak to your man
ager? I heard that you are taking people on?” I shout through the loud music, remembering the ad by the entrance. She looks me up and down like she is assessing if my black dress is short enough to get me a job in a place like this. Maybe I’m fooling myself; maybe the situation shifted and rat has no more influence in this part of the city. After all, everyone believes he is dead.
“Yeah, we do. What’s your name? I’ll see if you can have a quick chat with him.”
I think about my answer for a second, weighing all pros and cons. It’s time to kill Rosie Waltham. Tahlia died when she decided not to go back to Micah.
“Janine Morgan. My name is Janine Morgan.”
Chapter Seventeen
A job offer
I wait at the bar, sipping my coke and trying to act like I’m not nervous. The waitress shows up after several minutes with a huge smile on her face.
“Rob will see you in a minute. Here, take this. It’s better if you don’t go there sober,” she tells me, handing me a shot. It’s probably some kind of flavoured vodka. I drink it anyway, feeling good about this whole thing. I don’t want to get discouraged about her creepy statement. A few more of these and I’ll be wasted. The song changes and the DJ starts playing some techno stuff. The crowd cheers with approval and I want to roll my eyes.
My head is buzzing, and my palms are sweaty. For some reason I’m feeling nervous talking to some random guy about working in a place like this. After all, I have no ID, no references, and my body is covered in tattoos. I bet he’ll let me know straight away if I fit in the club or not.
I’m not turning back. I’m done with hiding and running. Rudolf can come for me now, because I have never been more ready. The fear that paralysed every cell in my body, the fear that shut me down for years has finally faded away. Nothing is going to stop me now.
Love & Hate Series Box Set 2 (3-4) - In Too Deep - Skimming the Surface Page 35
