“Well, they are lonely and single, maybe they’re hoping if they earn your respect now, they can have a chance at you when this part of the study is complete. After all, you are their temptation.”
Their temptation. Is that all I am? “How nice.”
“We all know what most men have on their mind once every sixty seconds, or whatever the statistic is, right? They’re not allowed to touch you, or they lose, so have fun with this.”
For the first time since I arrived here, Kricket’s idea doesn’t make me hate her. These men and their stupid ideas of convincing me to like them with nothing to offer in return for six months … they deserve a lot worse than me leaving tomorrow.
“Why are you here?” I ask her. “Obviously it seems you’ve taken a backseat to the men’s attraction, which makes no sense to me, given how gorgeous you and Krow are.”
Kricket unexpectedly wraps her arms around my neck and gives me a quick hug. “You’re sweet for saying that. You’re stunning, so don’t be so quick to assume they aren’t after you for legitimate reasons. The men were told Krow and I have significant others, and we’re here on business for a few months. In the meantime, there can’t be ten winners walking away from this. That would be a waste of money, right?”
I place my hands on the sides of my head, trying to understand what she’s getting at. “Wait, so you’re here to make them buckle and lose the money?”
“We are your black widows, Ashley.”
“Black widows?” I repeat.
“The research company conducting this, the one your brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law are affiliated with and have invested interest with, want the data but need to test the theories to their limitations.”
“That sounds evil and awful—inhumane really,” I state.
“It sounds like a reality TV show in the making,” she concurs.
I sigh and conclude that I’m stuck here until this is all over. Throughout my life, I have made a concerted effort to make lemonade out of lemons, and while I wasn’t on board with this nonsense twenty minutes ago, I’m in the mood to have a little postgraduate fun now.
Payback is a bitch, Bradley.
“Okay,” I tell Kricket. “Let’s do this.”
“Eek, okay now that we can be friends for real, I’m on your side. We can have a good time here.”
“I’m sure we can. But, um … where is Krow?”
“Shit,” Kricket says, spinning around, searching for her sister. “Oh shit, oh shit. She can’t tell them about Richard and she was drinking before we came outside.”
I follow Kricket on her heels, heading back toward the fire. I still don’t spot Krow, but Kricket seems to know exactly where she is by the direction she’s heading in.
“Krow I need to speak with you right now,” Kricket says, stating with authority in her words.
Krow pivots in her heels, then laughs. I haven’t seen Krow laugh. “Kricket, you give me booze and then you tell me to be quiet, what do you want from me?” Her words are slurring together, making me wonder how much she had to drink before coming down here.
Kricket grabs her hand and pulls her away from the conversation she was having with one of the men. “Oliver is nice,” she says. “He’s a divorce attorney, kind of sweet.”
“Krow, you know that’s not why we’re here,” Kricket reminds her.
The two begin to argue quietly, taking steps away from me. I choose not to follow because I’ve had enough drama for one night. I have to figure out my plan of action, and I need to continue digesting this ridiculous plot.
Theo is the first to approach me, but I spot Noah off by the water, taking in the whole scene. Noah looks like he’s been rejected and part of me wants to say he should feel that way, but the money, he’s in this for the money. He didn’t sign up to for me, or any woman. At least that’s what I assume. I suppose when there is nothing else to focus on, money can become an easy fulfillment.
“Are you okay?” Theo asks.
Forgetting about mostly everything Theo has told me about himself , I decide I’m not to waste any more time. I wrap my arm around his neck and try to pull him into me, but he doesn’t budget. “Whoa, whoa, what are you doing?”
“Kiss me, Theo. Right here, in front of all the other money—I mean, men.”
Theo takes me by the hand and presses against me, creating more space between us. “Have you lost your mind?”
“Nope, just finding it, I think.”
“Come on, you don’t want to kiss me?”
“Ew,” he says. “No, I don’t.”
“Ew?” I snap.
He leans forward, bringing his mouth to my ear. “I’d prefer to kiss Jim. What does that tell you?”
Oops. I slap my hand over my mouth. “I’m so sorry,” I say, stifling my words. “I didn’t think—”
“I sort of told you the other day.”
“I forgot,” I argue. “So, you’re here for the money?”
Theo glances up, his dark eyes glisten beneath the moonlight and a bright-white smile gleams. “Yes, I’m here for the money.”
“Fair enough,” I tell him. “Thank you for your honesty.”
Theo shakes his head. “Whatever trouble you’re about to start causing around here, I’d be careful if I were you,” he says.
“I’m not going to cause any trouble,” I tell him.
Theo loops his arm around my neck and hugs me to this side. “Please, be careful,” he says.
“Always am.”
Now is the time that I trip over a piece of firewood buried under the sand.
Not-so-shockingly, Theo catches me before I land on my butt. “Yeah, Ashley, you’re always careful.”
While Theo is teasing me, my sights are on Noah, curious about what’s going through his mind right now.
Within just a few steps of him, I have Max, the oral surgeon, making a run for me. “Baby,” he calls out.
Baby. We’re now at the point of him calling me baby after just three or four encounters.
“I’m not your baby’,” I tell him.
He slips his arm around my waist and lowers his mouth to my neck. “I can show you my own kind of social study if you’d like.”
“Max, you have to stop. I’m not into you, let it go.”
“Ouch, Ash, that’s rough. You haven’t even given me a fair chance to prove to you how happy we could be together.”
I want to run. Yup, I am going to run. This guy is like that zombie I don’t want to come face to face with at the end of a bad apocalypse movie. “You know what else is rough?” I respond.
“The way I kiss?” he purrs, following his question. I’m officially grossed out by what is, sadly, a good-looking man—a waste of looks for sure.
“Watch me walk away, Max. Just watch me walk away.”
Noah doesn’t move an inch during the time it takes me to make my way over to him. “I’m sorry,” is the first thing out of his mouth.
“I get it. You’re here for other reasons like you said.”
“When all else is gone, I knew I’d have my success and business to fall back on,” he says. “I thought I knew what I was getting myself into here, but I was wrong.”
Chapter 16
I decided to hide out in my room until it was time to go to work today. I figure the less interaction I have with these men, the better I'll be at this point. I feel like the thoughts in my head are a ping-pong ball flying back and forth between assumptions and understanding. I want to leave, but I want to stay. I want to punish some of these men, but I feel bad for some. They have been living in seclusion for the sake of money. Is money worth a person’s sanity?
The lunch shift at The Clam Pit is a little wilder today than it was yesterday. I like the feeling of keeping busy versus standing around, waiting for my next table. I experienced a lot of those types of shifts when working in the diner back in Connecticut.
I’ve said very few words to Noah in passing since I arrived at the restaurant. I was cordial an
d friendly, but it was similar to the way I might chat to someone on the street.
Noah seems to be sporting a look of concern as he greets patrons and checks in on tables to make sure everything is going well.
Our eyes meet often, but I can’t tell what he’s thinking, and I’m not sure about the thoughts fleeting through my head either. There’s this notion I have, though: I can’t have Noah, and I can’t control the fact that it makes me want him a little more now. I loved spending the bit of time together with him yesterday and learning about his past, but it seems dumb to continue a friendship with a man I’m attracted to, yet can’t pursue.
My next table has been seated in the corner of the outdoor balcony overlooking the water. It’s a man dining alone, and his back is toward me, with his menu open and erect resting on the table in front of him.
I place my hand on his shoulder so as not to startle him. “Welcome to The Clam Pit. Can I start you off with something to drink?”
“I could drink you up all day,” he says.
The voice is like a nail dragging across metal. “Max, what are you doing here?”
He smirks his mouthful of white veneers and places his hand on my elbow. “I missed my girl and wanted to come and see you for lunch.”
“Max,” I grunt, “I am not your girl, and you need to stop this crap.”
“Listen to me, baby,” he continues. “All you have to do is stick this out with me for the next six months, and we can live a happy life together without a care in the world. Isn’t that what you want?”
“No, Max. I don’t want a life with you, and I don’t think I’ve given you any impression to make you think otherwise.”
“Please, Ash, just give me a chance to show you what love can be.”
The handful of cereal I shoved down my throat this morning before I left for work is starting to churn in my stomach.
“Please stop. What can I get you to eat?” I continue.
“Take your clothes off and lay down on the table,” he says.
I can’t help what I do next. My hand wound up on its own, and I slap him across the face as hard as I can. “You’re a sick pig.”
“Everything okay over here?” Noah’s voice booms behind me.
“No,” I tell him.
“Max, my man, what are you doing here?” Noah asks, keeping a calm voice. I don’t know if he saw me slap him or not.
Max places his menu down flat on the table and crosses his hands on his lap. “I was coming to see my girl at lunch, but she’s acting a little feisty today.”
“Your girl?” Noah questions. “I didn’t realize you two were an item?”
“We’re not,” I interrupt.
Noah places his hand around my wrist and gently pulls me back to step in front of me. “You’re choosing Ashley over the money, huh?”
“I’m having my cake and eating it too, bro,” Max continues. “If you know what I mean.”
I don’t know what kind of boiling point Noah has, or if what Max is saying even bothers him, but Noah leans down and places his hands on his knees so he can speak a little closer to Max’s face. “Did Ashley consent to this?” Noah asks Max.
“I don’t need consent from her,” Max says, laughing like an ass. “We’re all here for the same reason, bro. Let’s not pretend like this isn’t a competition, and she isn’t one of the prizes. Where there’s a will, there is a damn way, and come hell or high water, I will win that money and then take the girl with me. I’m here to prove that I can win both.”
“Ashley is not an object you can win,” Noah explains in a soft voice.
“She obviously agreed to that type of commitment when deciding to be a whore who moves into an all-male community.”
My blood is boiling while listening to the words coming out of Max’s mouth, and I am tempted to jump over Noah and punch Max in the face.
Before I have a moment to react, Noah pulls Max’s arm, dragging him from his seat with what looks like little effort. There are veins in Noah’s head, protruding at the sides of his temples, and his jaw clenches, but his lips remain in a straight line. He drags Max from the table, across the restaurant, and out the front door. Max tried his best to escape Noah’s hold, but Noah was holding him in a way that he couldn’t fight back. I followed the two of them to the front door and take a quick peek out the window to see what is happening. I shouldn’t be surprised to see two men dressed in black pants and black shirts, topped with dark sunglasses, pull Max away.
When Noah returns to the lobby, he places his hand on my back and ushers me toward the kitchen and up the side stairwell to his office. “Are you okay?” he asks on the way up.
All I can wonder is if there are other men feeling like Max. What if Noah is the same way and just pulling the wool over my eyes. “I'm not surprised by Max’s behavior,” I tell him. “He’s been acting like a whack-job since the day I moved in.”
“We’re not all like him, if that’s what you’re thinking,” Noah says, opening up the doors that lead to his office.
“I wasn’t going to assume you all were, but I don’t feel like I know anyone’s intentions too well at the moment. Honestly, I still have the urge to leave, but at the same time, I’m curious to see how this all plays out.”
“Well, I don’t think you’ll be seeing Max again.”
“Good,” I tell him.
“Can we chat for a minute?” Noah asks, taking a seat behind his desk.
“Am I in trouble again?” I ask, laughing with a bit of apprehension. He is still my boss, and I do need this job.
“Oh, no, not at all,” he says. “It’s actually about last night.” Last night, the period of time I was out with my boss, ditched my boss at a carnival, and then snubbed him at the fire pit. I can only imagine what he wants to say.
“Ah,” I sigh, wishing this drama with the prize money wasn’t a thing in my life.
“I had a rough night,” he says, closing his eyes for a long second. He hardly knows me. I can’t be the cause of a rough night—not yet.
“Look, I’m sorry if I caused you problems, but this is a lot for me to take in, Noah.”
“This actually isn’t about you, Ashley.” Of course it’s not. I have to look like an insensitive egotistically bitch right now . “So, I’m a sensitive man after years of being desensitized while in the Marine Corps. The story from that woman last night set me back a bit. I was feeling weak and having a moment.” In other words, Noah is letting me know he made a mistake by telling me he wished he asked me out before hiring me.
“What do you mean?” I’m not sure I can handle the truth.
Noah inhales sharply. “Well, on a personal side, I suffer from a lot of PTSD from combat, but last night was the first time that internal pain I experience, hit me like a sack of bricks about another person. I fall into this black hole and as stupid as it sounds, I just need someone to hug me when I’m feeling that way. It’s the only thing that brings me out of my dark place if that makes sense?”
It was a terrible story we heard from that woman, Olivia, but I didn’t know he was taking it so hard. “I didn’t realize you weren’t okay after ...” I walked away.
“I didn’t either, to be honest. Olivia’s story sat with me, and I brewed. I saw this shit after I got home from my deployments, but it’s another thing to see the aftermath in a normal everyday-life setting. I walked away from the Marines, but she can’t.”
“I can’t imagine what it must feel like,” I tell him.
“Anyway, it was inappropriate for me to cross a line with you. Part of me is just a man who sees an attractive woman I want to get to know. The other part of me realizes I could have a lawsuit sitting on my desk by the end of the day for just saying this to you.”
“I’m not going to sue you, Noah. We can’t control every part of life, and to be fair, I broke down and said, ‘I like you’ first.”
Noah is a different kind of man. He’s sincere and full of a lot of life. He squeezes his fingers over the br
idge of his nose and inhales again. “I’m having a hard time, Ashley. I’ve been having a hard time for a few years now, and it’s not getting any easier. I’m not close with too many people because of this, and I feel like an ass for dragging you in as I have. My decisions can be erratic, which is why I’ve tried to seclude myself from people for the last six months. I didn’t think anyone would break through this wall, but--” he laughs as if he’s embarrassed. “You unexpectedly broke through the wall, and I don’t know how to handle it.”
Noah and I hardly know each other, which makes me wonder if he’s channeling this pain silently alone. “Do you ever talk to anyone about your feelings and the past?” I realize I’m focusing on the other part of this conversation, but it seems to be the root of it all.
“Nah, I figured the pain and thoughts would settle on their own after a while,” he says. Noah releases his fingers from his nose and glances out the window. There aren’t any tears, but there is a glossy look in his eyes.
I stand from my chair and do the only thing I can think to do. He needs a hug. He said that’s what he needs when he’s staring into a black hole. “You need a hug,” I tell him. I wait for him to stand from his chair, but he doesn’t. I’m not giving up on him though either, so I lean down to wrap my arms around his neck, but his knee hits the side of my mine by mistake, and I fall into his lap. I should have done the right thing and jumped up, moved, or played it off as if I tripped, which I did, but I don’t move. I know this is wrong. I shouldn’t be doing this. “You’re a hero to the world, Noah. Even heroes feel pain.”
“Ashley,” he says, sounding like he’s in pain.
“Just let it out,” I tell him.
“I’m in a lot of pain right now,” he says.
“I know. Just breathe,” I tell him. I don’t really know how to talk someone off the ledge from pain, but I’m saying what comes to mind first.
“I can’t just breathe, Ashley.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“No, seriously ... what is in your back pocket?” Noah asks, gritting his teeth.
The Bachelor Beach: The Love Connection Series - Villa One Page 12
