But increasingly, and with the advent of his retirement creeping up on him, he had begun to entertain the thought of finding someone to share his life. A few months ago, on salsa night at the micro-brewery just off base, he had run into the woman of his dreams. In fact, his first thought when laying eyes on the brunette at the table next to his was, There she is. That’s my future wife.
Recalling how he had bungled his best chance to be with the perfect woman, Santiago felt his face heat. To think he had actually proposed to a near-perfect stranger!
It was so unlike him—and yet, he was Hispanic, after all, and most Hispanic men were incurable romantics.
His rash proposal had sent the lovely Nina running. Thanks to Eden, Santiago not only knew her last name now, but he knew where she worked.
In Eden’s words, all Nina Aydin really needed was a persistent yet gentle suitor. Given the nature of his work, Santiago certainly qualified as persistent. The men he worked with might not say he was gentle, exactly, but they didn’t always see his softer side.
Rubbing his hands in anticipation, Santiago sealed his intention to pursue the brunette ballerina who’d evaded him at their first encounter. God willing, she would one day be his wife.
Eden noticed Jonah’s head bob as he studied the menu. Oh, dear. Was he seriously falling asleep?
“You okay? We can go home, if you want.”
Her question brought both Jonah’s and Miriam’s eyes up from their menus. Jonah’s usually sharp gaze struck Eden as unfocused.
“No, I’m fine,” he insisted. “Hungry,” he added.
His answer didn’t convince her, but Miriam, who sat next to him, looked so dismayed at the prospect of leaving the Mexican restaurant they frequented, Eden thrust aside her private concerns and looked back at the menu. She found herself wanting to eat something she’d never tried before, something new to go with the new life she was experiencing.
Making her choice she looked back at Jonah. “What you said at church today about God turning your heart to him. That was beautiful.”
He blinked at her, his gaze softening. “Thanks.”
“I’d never heard you talk about God before today,” she added.
Miriam looked over to gauge his reaction.
He grimaced rather sheepishly. “I always figured I could take care of myself. But I guess there comes a time when we all need help.”
Picturing him praying in a cell on another continent tugged at her heartstrings.
“I’m very glad God found you when he did,” she said sincerely.
His searching gaze told her he was reading every possible significance into her statement.
“I’m sorry about the money,” he said, unexpectedly.
“Money?” What on earth? “Oh, the life insurance.” She waved a negligent hand. “Please.” She shook her head at him. “You can’t put a price on a human life.”
He smiled rather bitterly. “I hardly think I’m worth that much, but I would like to be. I can work on it,” he added.
His answer both worried and encouraged her. With him investing so much of himself into their marriage, could she ever really bring herself to leave him? “Is that why you’re sanding the deck?” She raised an eyebrow.
“No.” He shook his head in an exaggerated manner, making her laugh. “I want to host a Labor Day party, remember.”
“I remember,” Miriam inserted.
The waiter appeared to take their orders. As he walked away, Miriam asked him, “Do you remember this place at all?”
Jonah looked around intently. “It looks like places I’ve been before.”
As with many Mexican restaurants, the interior was dimly lit, with adobe walls and wooden booths tucked into private alcoves.
“We came here every Sunday whenever you were home.”
Jonah’s brow furrowed as he looked around again, clearly desperate to remember something about the place.
“What matters is the present,” Eden assured the both of them. Hearing her own words, she realized it was time to give Jonah a chance. With God anchoring their marriage, they actually stood a chance, didn’t they?
The look he gave her was both grateful and hopeful—and sleepy. He put a hand over his mouth and turned his head away to hide an enormous yawn. All at once, Eden saw him stiffen. His yawn disappeared and recognition hardened his features. Following his stare, Eden was dismayed to see Lieutenant Commander Jimmy Lowery sitting alone in a booth on the opposite side of the crowded restaurant.
Jonah looked back at her, but his recognition of Lowery unsettled her. For some reason, he didn’t seem to like the man. A frown now rode his brow ridge. He unfolded his napkin and set it in his lap, but it was obvious he was thinking about Lowery and possibly some rumors that existed. Master Chief hadn’t wasted any time telling him, apparently.
Eden dared to put her cards on the table. She had nothing to hide, so why not?
“I guess you’ve heard he used to call me,” she said, watching Jonah’s reaction closely.
His gaze came up. He glanced at Lowery then back at her.
“When?” he demanded.
Oh, dear, she’d done it again—blurting confessions that didn’t need to be said. Master Chief hadn’t said anything, apparently.
“After your disappearance,” she said, glancing at Miriam and asking herself belatedly if the subject wasn’t appropriate for her ears. “He called several times a week. Showed up a couple of times at the house. At first, I thought he was simply concerned, you being a teammate and all. He said he wanted to make sure we were okay,” she added.
Jonah sat straighter in his chair. His shoulders went back. The muscles in his jaw flexed. A portion of Eden’s newfound confidence retreated. Suddenly, Jonah looked so much like the husband she used to know, with his jaw clenched and his emotions concealed, she had to wonder if he’d changed after all. He’d never been possessive, but he was territorial. She wouldn’t put it past him to slide silently out of the booth for a quiet word with Lowery. He wouldn’t make a scene, of course, but he’d certainly get his point across.
“What’d you say to him?” Jonah’s voice sounded exactly the way it used to when he was upset.
Eden looked away, regretting her impulsive tongue. She had hoped never to hear Jonah’s voice go hard and cold that way again.
She looked back at him, her own words terse and brittle. “I told him he was wasting his time. I think he finally got the picture.”
Jonah searched her gaze for several seconds while Miriam’s gaze went back and forth between them, her look of contentment gone.
“Is he the reason you want us to separate?” he asked.
The hurtful words hit her like a slap to the face. And he’s back, said a cynical voice in her head. “I’m going to go wash my hands,” she said, refusing to answer him.
“Wait, I didn’t mean that,” Jonah muttered with contrition.
Ignoring him, Eden scooted out of the booth and fled to the ladies’ room.
Relieved to be the only patron in the restroom, she leveled a stern look at herself in the mirror as she washed her hands.
What are you doing? she asked herself. Either you stick to the plan and stop misleading Jonah into thinking you’re going to stay with him, or you go all in and give him the chance he deserves.
She bit her lower lip. But what if Jonah was like the shallow soil of the parables and the seeds of spirituality withered and died, turning him back into the man he was before? Giving him a chance meant risking her heart all over again. He had broken it once before, was she really going to leave herself vulnerable?
She searched her reflection for an answer.
“I don’t know,” the woman in the mirror said.
Looking down at the sink she sent up yet another prayer for clarity. “Show me a sign, Lord. I still need a sign.”
With an indrawn breath, she dried her hands and left the restroom to return to her family.
As she made her way to their table, she s
aw Jimmy Lowery from the corner of her eye catch sight of her and do a double take. She could see him track her all the way back to her table where Eden was pleased to see Jonah chuckling at something Miriam had said. As she slid into the booth across from them, he stretched a hand across the table and regarded her apologetically.
“I’m sorry,” he said with convincing feeling. “It’s not you I don’t trust. It’s him.” He darted a look in Lowery’s direction.
Just then, the waitress appeared, carrying their plates of food and sparing Eden from having to say anything. The rest of the meal passed pleasantly enough with Jonah darting only a few spurious glances across the room.
Eden was polishing off her second shrimp taco when Jonah looked up and abruptly lowered his fork. A shadow fell over the table, and Eden turned her head to find Lowery standing next to her.
“Hey, all,” he said, nodding at the women and holding a hand out for Jonah to shake. “Thought I’d come over and say hi. Welcome home, Jonah.”
“Thanks, Jimmy.”
As the two men shook hands, Eden watched Lowery take note of Jonah’s deteriorated condition. “I’m so glad to see you again.”
His assertion could certainly have sounded more sincere. She held her breath, awaiting Jonah’s reaction.
“Are you?” he asked.
Lowery stiffened, folding his arms across his chest. “Of course. I, uh, I had a recent chat with Elwood, the NCIS investigator. He says you’re starting to remember stuff about the mission?”
Was he asking if Jonah remembered what had happened?
“I remember some of my captivity,” Jonah answered carefully.
“That’s good,” the XO said. “Can’t exactly talk about it here, though,” he added with an awkward laugh.
“Right,” Jonah agreed. “Thank you for checking on my wife while I was dead. I’m alive now,” he added with a hard smile.
Jimmy let loose a nervous laugh. “So you are. Well, I don’t want to interrupt. Enjoy your afternoon.”
His gaze met Eden’s briefly as he turned and walked to the exit. She didn’t know Jimmy Lowery well enough to say for certain, but he struck her as rattled. By what? Did he think Jonah might turn jealous and pounce on him when he least expected it?
For his part, Jonah stopped eating. His expression was unreadable, but Eden could feel the tension radiating from him. Miriam was eyeing them watchfully.
“He mentioned an investigator Elwood,” Eden said, thinking if they talked it might ease the tension. “Is that the man who left you his business card?”
Jonah took a bite out of his tortilla so he couldn’t answer.
Miriam did it for him. “It’s probably the guy who came by yesterday when we were sanding the deck.”
Jonah nodded and swallowed but said nothing.
“What did you two talk about?” Maybe speaking would ease some of the stress she felt roiling in him.
“Just trying to figure out what happened to me,” he said with food in his mouth.
She would like to know that, too. Obviously, there was more to the story than she’d been told. Was he really a new man because he’d let God into his life? Or would she start seeing the old Jonah emerge more and more frequently, as he was doing now?
What if he hadn’t changed enough?
Wouldn’t she be the fool, losing her heart to him a second time.
Keeping his expression as neutral as possible, Jonah drew deep, steadying breaths and kept the conversation going until his adrenaline subsided.
Seeing Jimmy Lowery up close and personal hadn’t jogged any memories, but it had left him with the absolute conviction, for whatever reason, that the man had betrayed him.
Lowery was the reason Jonah had suffered unspeakable horrors at the hands of his captors. Bitterness beyond words twisted through him, tying his full stomach into knots. He lowered his fork, wishing he hadn’t taken that last bite.
Why? Why would one Team guy ever turn on another? Such behavior was unconscionable, unbelievable.
Maybe because it wasn’t real. Maybe Jonah was making it all up. PTSD played serious mind games with its victims, didn’t it? Maybe Branson was right, and he’d developed the disorder. With his brain chemistry out of whack, Eden’s remarks about Jimmy calling on her while Jonah was away were affecting his brain like a toxin, causing him to invent carcinogenic thoughts. What if those thoughts had no basis in reality—like the cop car running him off the road the day before.
Stop.
The tense and uncertain look on Eden’s face gave Jonah the wherewithal to haul on the reins of his pessimism. None of it mattered right now. What mattered more than anything was ensuring his relationship with his wife and stepdaughter stayed on an even keel so they would give him the chance to prove himself.
The last thing he wanted to do was ruin this outing by giving voice to his strange convictions. He would run them by his most trusted teammates first, measuring his sanity by their responses. If they agreed with him that Lowery’s actions that night were suspicious, then—and only then—would Jonah share his angst with Eden.
Pinning a smile on his taut face, he forced himself to take one last bite out of his enchilada.
“This restaurant is great,” he stated with forced enthusiasm. “No wonder we used to come here.”
Chapter 13
Jonah and his master chief were the last to arrive at Lucas Strong’s condo.
As they followed Monica into the dining room, Jonah’s gaze went straight to the former tight end, sitting at the head of the table with Theo and Saul on either side. Even seated, Lucas Strong loomed over the average-sized men. His home was nothing out of the ordinary, except it was filled with the kind of high-end furniture and décor found at Crate & Barrel stores. Either Lucas had an eye for interior decorating or Monica had contributed her talents. The yellow lilies overflowing the vase in the middle of the table made Jonah think of his commander.
“There you are.” Catching sight of the latecomers, Lucas pushed to his feet, and the others did likewise—an unnecessary show of respect, but heartening all the same. SEALs overlooked rank in casual settings. This was clearly their way of building up Jonah’s self-esteem.
Lucas pumped his hand, then turned to Master Chief and added, “Great class today. I never knew that about Jonah.”
“What about me?” Jonah asked.
“Not you,” Lucas corrected his assumption. “The Biblical Jonah. God wanted him to preach repentance in Ninevah. In modern-day terms that’d be like God asking one of us to preach morality in Las Vegas. I can see why Jonah tried to run.”
Master Chief chuckled. “At some point he realized there’s no running from God.”
“When he became fish food,” Saul drawled, proving he knew something about the Bible, though he professed to not believing.
Lucas nodded. “I’ve had a Jonah-moment myself once,” he admitted.
Jonah wanted to hear what that was, but Lucas went straight to taking their drink orders. Master Chief asked for a diet Coke. Remembering his medication, Jonah did the same.
“Have a seat,” Lucas offered as Monica hurried off to fetch their beverages.
“It’s my fault we’re late,” Jonah said, pulling out a seat next to Saul. No sooner was he seated than Saul hooked him by the neck. Pulling him close, he scrubbed his knuckles on Jonah’s scalp. So much for formality.
“Bet you were busy with your wife,” he grated in Jonah’s ear.
Jonah’s face heated. He was glad when Saul let go of him.
“Are you blushing, sir?” Saul’s devilish smile widened.
“I was sleeping,” Jonah clarified. “Can’t keep my eyes open in the afternoon,” he added with a self-deprecating grimace.
“Nothing wrong with that.” Theo’s deep voice held soothing undertones.
All the men nodded their agreement, their gazes sympathetic.
Master Chief, who’d seated himself across from Jonah, said, “You’ve got about a year of lost sleep t
o catch up on, Jaguar. We lost a little sleep ourselves, while you were gone.”
A reflective silence fell over the table.
“I want to know about the night I went missing,” Jonah said quietly.
Just then Monica returned to the room bearing two cans of diet Coke and two glasses with ice.
“Here you go,” she said, placing a drink in front of Master Chief, then Jonah.
Dark, fragrant hair slipped over Jonah’s shoulder as she leaned over him.
“Can I get you anything else before I disappear?”
Her sarcasm on the last word let them know she considered her exclusion unfair. Jonah could see why she’d be put out, considering she worked in Spec Ops as a secretary. But their conversation didn’t involve her, and she hadn’t been part of the op.
Lucas answered, “I think we have everything we need, sweetheart. Thank you.”
She made a point of crossing to his chair and dropping a kiss on his cheek.
“I’ll be in the bedroom,” she purred. On her way out of the room, she cast a backward glance over her shoulder, and her gaze landed squarely on Jonah.
What the heck? His instinct for trouble stirred. First the touch, then the look. Was she seriously coming onto him with her fiancé in the room? Fortunately, Lucas seemed oblivious.
“Do you two live together?” he asked when Monica was out of earshot. How well did Lucas even know the woman he intended to marry?
“Oh.” Lucas blinked at him and frowned slightly. “No. I mean, she’s here a lot, but she doesn’t live here.”
“I’m just asking,” Jonah added on a light note. He glanced at Master Chief, who heeded his cue to get the discussion going.
“So let’s talk about the op. Jonah doesn’t remember any of it.”
Saul groaned. “We’ve been through this at least a dozen times with what’s-his-name, the NCIS agent.”
“Elwood,” Theo answered, nodding his agreement.
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