by Elsie James
“Oh, hi, Rach. I’m surprised to see you here.” She draws out her words and adds an upward inflection to the end of them.
“Not as surprised as me. Excuse me.” I try to take a step around her. With her waif-like frame, you’d think it would be simple. But her pilates-induced, ninja-like agility lets her slide quickly in front of me.
“Can I help you with something?” I ask her in my most annoyed tone.
“What are you doing here?” She’s bold, but I’m not in the mood for her bullshit right now.
“Me? What am I doing here? I’m here to see Greyson but he’s—” I trail off wondering why I’m even bothering to respond to her. She’s caught me off guard.
“Oh, don’t you know? He’s not here yet. Grey would never work this early on a Sunday unless the whole town was on fire.” Grey? Fury flows through me.
“You know an awful lot about his schedule.”
“Well, yes.” She smiles. “I should. We kind of have this thing.” A thing? What thing?
“Chasity, what the hell are you talking about?”
“Oh, so he didn’t tell you? How awkward, I’m sorry. He and I, we…talk. You know how it is, us townies had to stick together while all of you guys took off for bigger and better things. So, he and I, we’re connected.”
“Wow. Good for you, Chasity.” My voice drips with sarcasm. “But it seems like if you two were so connected, you would have been married by now.”
“Well, I didn’t want to mention it, but let’s just say you never know what could be right around the corner.” She says in a sing-song voice.
I’m disgusted. Whatever they do or don’t have. She’s here, isn’t she? Just like me, an ex-lover of Greyson’s. Completely convinced that she is still someone special to him.
“Well, I won’t be needing an invitation to your make-believe wedding. Now excuse me.” This must be what I look like to the other guys in the station. Just another crazy ex-girlfriend making her way up to Greyson’s office to beg for attention. I have to get out of here.
“I’m leaving too. I just stopped by to drop these off for him. They’re exactly the kind he likes—gluten free, dairy free brownies. His favorites. He’ll be in at two, just the time he starts feeling tempted to reach for the sugar. I’m so proud of the way he looks now. We’ve worked so hard in our crossfit program. Me cheering him on each step of the way.”
Now I’ve heard it all, a comment about my weight wrapped in a backhanded compliment about Greyson’s body? I exhale and tell myself to take the high road. She’s not worth it.
“Chasity, I’m gonna stop you right there.” I’m furious.
“Oh, Rachie, you’re not going to stop anything. You can’t even stop your hand from putting a cookie in your mouth, can you?” She gives me a passive aggressive smirk.
I’m no longer interested in taking the high road. I take a step, nudging my body past hers. She does too, slamming into my hip. The collision knocks her into the handrail of the tiny stairwell.
“Oh my gawd! What are you doing, you cow?” she yells at me, but I’m already at the bottom of the stairs. She’s not worth a single word. But then one comes to me and I turn my head back to her.
“Hey, Chasity, go fuck yourself.”
She’s in his crossfit group? I thought it was just the guys. I think back to the picture of the two of them at the beach house. Feeling myself falling into a familiar spiral of jealousy, I decide to change my course. I won’t live in limbo like I did with Spencer, ignoring sign after sign. This time, I need to know what’s happening up front. If Greyson has a “thing” of any kind with someone like her, we’re done. I won’t tolerate it.
I drive down Main Street as quickly as I can. Looking up, I see the glass windows of the Hideout. Relief washes over me when I see his truck. He’s here. He must have gotten his schedule mixed up. Nothing malicious is happening. I walk into the lobby of the crowded building, stopping to fix the buckle on my shoe. The elevator door opens and Greyson steps out. My face lights up when I see him, handsome as ever.
But my momentary bliss is rudely interrupted when I see he’s not alone. A beautiful woman with a curvy hourglass figure steps out of the elevator with him. She’s wearing a navy dress and leopard heels. I stay crouched, pretending to fix my shoe while I take it all in.
“Here’s your key back.” She smiles at him.
“Keep it,” he replies. “Just in case you want to pop back over.”
The brunette slides the key onto her key ring and smiles sweetly at him. “Thanks.”
He holds the front door open for her and they walk out into the street together. Vomit rises in the back of my throat. I can’t believe what I’m seeing. I can’t go through this again. When the coast is clear, I make my way back to my car.
I put my visor down and sit in my car collecting myself. The thing about getting cheated on is that it breaks your sensor. I can’t trust my instincts because they’ve let me down in the past. First, by encouraging me to ignore obvious signs, and then by tricking me into seeing signs that aren’t there.
So I fall back on the facts. It’s eleven o’clock in the morning. Greyson told me he would be at work. I guess Greyson has a type, because a woman who looks like me is leaving his apartment with him. He’s never mentioned her to me. He gave her a key. He hopes she pops back in. To top it off, Chasity and I have an uncomfortable amount of things in common. I can’t argue with facts.
The old me would have thrown myself in front of Greyson and begged for an explanation. But that little girl is gone. This time, he’s dealing with a grown woman, and I don’t beg. I take my hair out of the bun, letting it cascade over the front of my shoulder. I reapply my lipstick and throw on my giant black sunglasses. I prepare to block Greyson from my life. Taking out my phone, I delete his number. I delete him from my social media pages. Marking his number as spam in my phone, I place him on my do not accept calls list. I won’t be a victim here. If Greyson wants out, he should go. This time without any drama.
The adrenaline propels me toward my apartment. I crawl into bed and give myself the night to cry. Driving out of Greyson’s life for good is a pain that cuts deeper this second time around.
The fight in me melts away with the sunrise, and all I’m left with are facts. The good news is my judge of character isn’t broken. I knew Greyson couldn’t be trusted and I was right. And the terrible news is, I was right.
Chapter 6: Greyson
I arrive at two in the afternoon for my shift at the firehouse. An unwelcome surprise waits outside of my office door. Chasity is draped across an office chair and looking at her phone. I’m not in the mood.
“Grey, it was terrible,” she whines as she holds a large ice pack on her hip.
“Good afternoon.” I keep it short and professional with her, as usual. Getting my keys out of my pocket, I unlock my office door. I attempt to close my door, but she hops to her feet and follows me into my office. I have no idea why Chasity is hanging around today, but it’s annoying.
“Look what your friend did to me.” Lifting the bottom part of her shirt, she exposes a bright purple bruise on her right hip. Whatever she’s talking about, I don’t have time to deal with.
“You need to leave. I have a ton to do.” My voice is flat, uninterested in feeding into her drama. I open my laptop and attempt to look busy, hoping that for once she will take the hint.
“She’s a monster.” Chasity exaggerates every word. But the word “she” catches me off guard.
Begrudgingly, I take the bait. “She?” I ask.
“You know, your friend Rachel.” She draws out the word friend and accentuates it with air quotes.
I close my laptop and look directly at Chasity for the first time. Concern rushes through me. “Rachel was here this morning? Was she looking for me?” I ask, trying not to sound worried.
“Yes, she was looking for you.” Chasity rolls her eyes. “But she attacked me. It was vicious.”
“When did she leave?”
I press her for details but not the ones she wants to share.
“She left a few hours ago, she was pretty upset.” Chasity knows this matters to me and she loves the power of piecing out this information to me bit by bit.
“Upset about what?” I’m furious. She’s chased girls out of my life before, but Rachel is different. I stand, slamming my fists on my desk. “Chasity, what did you do?”
“Oh, I didn’t do anything, she’s the one that attacked me. I only mentioned our thing and she completely freaked out on me. Really, you have to find someone more stable.”
“Our ‘thing’. What are you talking about? We don’t have a thing.” I struggle to keep my volume under control. But this has gone far enough.
Chasity leans in toward me, pouting her lips and batting her eyes. “Grey, I think you know we’ve always had a thing. You and me.”
I take a step back as far as possible. Someone will appreciate her attention but it’s never going to be me.
“Come on, just give in” She puckers her lips and tries to kiss me.
I stand up and walk to my door. “You need to leave. And please stop bringing the food. We don’t eat it. We toss it as soon as you leave because cookies should have sugar in them.”
Her sweet voice vanishes, replaced by a shrill and condescending tone. “You mean to tell me you’d really choose someone that looks like her when you could be with someone that looks like me? What’s wrong with you.” She stands gesturing at her own body, spinning so I can see her. She looks like a lowercase letter i. Just a stick with a big circle head. I don’t think there is a man alive who wouldn’t rather treat himself to Rachel’s delicious curves. This is further proof of Chasity’s insanity.
“It’s time for you to go.” I stand, escorting her to the door. She mutters something, but all I can think about is Rachel. Where is she now? Where does she think I was this morning when she stopped by?
“What’s wrong with you? She attacked me. I’m the victim here!”
As soon as both of Chasity’s feet are off our property, I close the doors and lock them. She stands red-faced shouting through the glass door. I close the blinds. I need to talk to Rachel.
“No one opens this door for any reason, understood?” I shout at the guys.
“Yeah, no problem here,” Marco responds with a laugh.
I take out my phone immediately and dial Rachel. The call cannot be completed because she blocked me. I check her social media. Blocked. This is how she must have felt all those years ago when I did this to her. This is devastating. No wonder she was so angry.
My adrenaline picks up. I lost her once, and I’m not losing her again. If she won’t let me contact her electronically, I’ll have to find a way to do it in person. Rachel is my whole world. Even when I thought that we were destined to live separate lives, there were always going to be parts of me that were inaccessible to everyone else. But now that she’s back within my reach, that’s no longer good enough.
“Joshua, let Tarik know he’s in charge. I’ll be out for the rest of today and tomorrow too. I have somewhere to be.”
Chapter 7: Rachel
“Cheers, to you and Hunter taking off on your next adventure.” Juni and I clink our glasses together. She is on her way out of town and I thought a breakfast mimosa would be the perfect send off.
“And to me coming back in just a week,” she adds.
We clink our glasses and take a sip. “So, what happened with Greyson?”
I exhale. It’s been two days since I blocked him, and I’ve been miserable. “He lied. And he lied about spending time with another woman of all things. I saw him leave his house with a woman who looked like me when he told me that he would be at work.”
“She looked like you? No!” Juni is outraged for me. “Who was she?”
“I have no idea, but he gave her a key. And before that, I went to see him at the station, and Chasity was already there.”
“Chasity? Like, high school Chasity?” Juni’s expression of shock says it all.
“Yep, apparently she and Greyson have a thing.”
Juni puts her hand up. “They don’t have a thing. She has a thing for him and every other hot guy in Peony Pointe. She was after Hunter for a while too. I can’t speak for the brunette leaving his place, but Chasity isn’t an issue. Just a crazy firehouse groupie if you ask me. So, what did he have to say about it?”
“Oh, I haven’t asked him. I blocked him,” I say proudly.
“You blocked him? Rachel. Are you serious? Why?”
Her question quickly erodes my confidence. “Because I won’t stand for it.”
“It’s not about him, it’s about you. You deserve an explanation. How do you feel having no answers again? This time by your own doing.”
Ugh, she’s right. “It’s kind of a nightmare. To be honest, I feel nothing like the empowered woman I thought I would walk away as.”
A frantic knock on my apartment door startles me. The knock continues in a repeated pattern of three frantic knocks followed by a jiggle of the handle. Over and over. It can only be one person, and I’m really not ready to see her right now.
I stand to open the door. “Hello, Mother.” My shoulders slump in defeat and I sit on my couch.
“Your door was locked.” Mom’s hands gesture wildly.
“I know.”
She pushes past me and looks me up and down. I walk back to the couch, letting my body slide onto it. “You don’t look good.” Mom closes the door.
“Thanks, and I know that too. It’s early, Mom, and you’re so loud.”
Mom immediately starts handwashing my dishes. Which is completely unnecessary because I have a dishwasher and because I’m an adult. But I’m not up for a battle over dishes this morning, so I let it happen.
Juni sits at my tiny kitchen table.
“Juni, how are you?” Mom asks her.
“I’m doing well.”
“I’m happy at least one of you is. What’s wrong?” Mom looks at me.
“Mom, Greyson said other people influenced his decision to break up with me. Do you know anything about that?”
A flicker of recognition flashes across mom’s face. “Juni, I need a moment with my daughter.”
“Oh, ok. Not a problem.” Juni stands and gathers her bag. She heads towards the front door. I hug her goodbye.
“Bye, Juni. Don’t be a stranger,” Mom shouts more loudly than required.
I turn to face my mom. My entire kitchen is gleaming and it’s only been ten minutes. I pour two cups of coffee and sit at the table. “So?” I ask her expectantly.
“You know, at the time, I think Dad and I just wanted more for you than what he could offer.”
“What he could offer? What year is this? I don’t have a dowry. What does that mean?”
“We didn’t want you to have to work so hard.” Mom’s casual explanation feels like a brush off and it’s infuriating.
“I like working hard. You didn’t like that he grew up near us and not on the hill. You didn’t think he’d make anything of himself?” There’s something she’s not saying, I can tell.
“We just thought that your life would be easier with someone like Spencer. That’s why we always pushed you two together.” At least she can admit it. “What we did was wrong, and I can see that now.”
“You think you were wrong about Greyson?” I repeat her words, processing them.
“Oh, I know we were. The day he showed up with the ring, I told your father—”
“What?” I cut her off. “He showed up with a ring?”
“It was right after you left for the University. You were trying to get settled into your new life and having such a hard time. Greyson showed up at our house. He wanted our blessing to marry you. Of course, he was always a nice boy, but he was never going anywhere. Dad thought he saw too much of himself in Greyson. And you were on your way to bigger and better. You had your scholarship and I just couldn’t bear to see you give it all up for him. Dad told
him no and asked him to stop contacting you. When he said he wouldn’t, Dad made it clear that it was not a suggestion.”
“Mom, what did Dad say?” I think I’m going to be sick.
“Dad told him you were going to give up your scholarship to move back to Peony Pointe and be with him. Dad said if he really loved you, he’d back off and let you live your life with Spencer. He showed them the picture of you two.” There you have it. We were sabotaged by my own parents.
“But none of that is true. I worked so hard for that scholarship and I’ve always wanted to teach. I never would have given that up, and he wouldn’t have asked me to. Spencer and I were hardly friends at that point.”
My head spins with the realization that all the time I spent angry at Greyson should have been directed at my parents.
“I thought you could see the world, live a life of extravagance and leisure. It’s what your sister did, and look how happy it’s made her.”
“I’m not her, Mom. That life was never what I wanted and because of you, I lost the man who could give me exactly what I needed.” Tears spill over, cascading down my face. “Why didn’t you tell me? Maybe not at the time, but why not sometime after?”
“I’m telling you now. I’m sorry.” I can’t accept her apology right now. She cost me Greyson, and that infuriates me.
“You need to leave. I need time.”
Mom stands giving me a quick hug and I close the door behind her.
Being in the silence of my apartment is too much for me. I need to find Greyson and apologize. If only I had tried harder to reach out to him, asked a few more questions. Instead, I let my parents railroad me into a life with Spencer that I never wanted. Life without Greyson is lonely. Finding my car keys, I open my front door and fly down the stairs. I need to talk to him. But before I reach my car, he’s already there. Greyson stands holding a single white rose. I take a step toward him. Relief floods me.
