by KL Donn
Before Noah
Daniels Family Book Three
KL Donn
Copyright © 2020 by KL Donn
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Cover Design & Formatting by Alluring Write Productions
Editing by KA Matthews
Created with Vellum
Contents
Synopsis
Prologue
1. Ember
2. Noah
3. Ember
4. Noah
5. Ember
6. Noah
7. Noah
8. Ember
9. Noah
Epilogue
Epilogue
What’s Next
Sneak Peek
About the Author
Also by KL Donn
Synopsis
From USA Today Bestselling Author KL Donn comes the third book in the Daniels Family series.
Noah Brennan was sure of two things in his life: his marriage ruined him for other women, and he was in love with his best friend's little sister.
Resisting Ember was futile, from their first kiss to the first night together.
When Noah finally decided to go all-in with the woman he loves, his past came knocking and destroyed everything.
Ember Daniels was tired of being treated like the sadness-filled orphaned girl. She had high hopes, starting with her brother's best friend.
Ember had loved Noah from the first time he kissed her. Her dreams grew into reality when she confronted him about their kiss. Noah’s willpower snapped, and soon, they were sharing a bed.
All good things must come to an end, though, and theirs came crashing down with the return of his wife.
Feeling shattered and betrayed, Ember sank into depression, and Noah’s silence was deafening.
After a shocking discovery and a single violent act, does Noah step up to the plate and finally claim Ember, or do they live with their heartbreak?
Prologue
Ember
I have been in love with Noah Brennan for as long as I can remember. Every time he pushed me away, I stifled a cry. Suppressed a scream or a curse. Sucked it up and moved forward.
When he kissed me, I damn near melted in my shoes.
When he shrugged it off after being confronted about it, I tried my best to veil my hurt and failed.
When he showed up on my doorstep that same night, angry and possessed by lust, I accepted everything he offered and ignored everything he didn’t.
And now, here we are.
Nerves have me rattled as I enter the precinct with Thea to see Kol and Noah. I don’t understand why, though. Noah’s note said he wants to tell Kol about us, and that couldn’t make me happier. My brothers, Kol & Arsen, mean everything to me, and hiding this secret from them isn’t something I want to continue.
In starting this relationship with Noah, I want the air cleared.
Stepping into the squad room, I immediately notice Noah sitting at his desk. When he sees Thea run past him, straight to Kol’s office, his startling azure gaze meets mine.
A lazy smile spreads across his face as he stands and saunters over to me. While brushing the hair off my forehead, Noah’s eyes search mine.
I hope he finds what he’s looking for.
“Hi, gorgeous. Glad you came.”
His gruff voice makes my insides quiver. “Me, too,” I whisper.
Enfolding me in his embrace, he guides me back to his desk. After pulling out the extra chair for me to sit in, he wheels his over and joins me.
This man has never been so affectionate with me before. Well, aside from the last couple of days and sharing my bed. But never in public. Not like this.
It’s a claiming. Or it feels like it.
“Once they’re done in there, I’ll have a word with Kol, then I’m taking you to dinner.” I don’t get a chance to respond before he leans forward to kiss me, and the minute our lips touch, my heart pounds so loudly in my chest, I’m sure everyone can hear it.
“Brennan, visitor!” I hear someone call, but Noah doesn’t pull away, so I ignore the person.
Until I hear an awful screech.
“You have got to be kidding me!” A woman screams, so highly pitched, I’m surprised the windows don’t shatter. “Who the fuck is this homewrecking whore?” I see the banshee storming over to us as we separate and stand.
Confused, I look up to Noah for guidance, but before either of us can say or do anything, an open hand slaps me across the face so hard I taste blood. Tears bite at my eyes as Noah steps between the stranger and me. I hear Kol yell, but I’m so hurt as her words register that I turn around and bolt for the door marked exit.
I hear Thea calling my name, but I don’t stop. I run until my legs give out, crying through the overwhelming and familiar heartbreak.
My vision blurs as I hold my cheek, still stinging, and wander through downtown Fayetteville, wondering how my life turned so lonely. How I’m always the one being burned.
I’ve longed for love my entire life. The kind that wraps you up and holds you tight on cold winter nights. The kind that lasts an eternity.
The love Arsen has for Marina.
The obsession Kol has for Thea.
I’ve always wanted that for myself.
Before Noah Brennan…
Noah
I should have seen this coming. I should have known that the minute I experienced just a sliver of happiness, that everything would come crumbling down like the Berlin Wall.
But I didn’t.
And now Ember hates me. Thinks I betrayed her.
And if the side-eyes I’m getting from my fellow officers are anything to go by, they believe the same. I’m no longer Detective Noah Brennan, decorated and dedicated officer to the Fayetteville PD. I’m now Noah Brennan, cheating scumbag.
Except I’m not.
I’ve been pushing for a divorce from this bitch for over two years now. And since she’s made her presence known, I can only assume one thing: she’s been advised of the new court date. Which means my life is about to get a shitload more hectic.
It’s also why I watch Ember run away, tears streaming down her face, and don’t chase after her like I want to.
“That hussy was touching my husband!” Katrina yells back at Kol’s angry stance.
“Ex-husband,” I correct the vile bitch. I’ve been fighting her tooth and nail for a divorce, and since that fucking kiss with Em, I’ve been pushing even harder for her to bring this marriage to an end.
“I haven’t signed the papers!” Her vindictive response makes me homicidal. That must have been what my lawyer called about last week. I haven’t had time to get in to see him.
“Married or not, you don’t randomly get to attack people. Arrest her for assault.” Kol’s move gives me a small measure of satisfaction.
“You can’t do that! Noah!” I shake my head at her—she did this to herself—and follow Kol into his office.
“What the hell was that?” he questions before the door is even closed.
“Trina’s off her rocker. I had new divorce papers sent to her last month. She refused to sign them, so I set up a court date for next week. I need her out of my life, man.” I’m fucking livid I allowed this mess to touch Ember. I can’t imagine what she’s feeling right now.
“Because of Ember?” Our eyes meet, and I don’t say a thing. “Don’t break her heart, man.” He appears to understand.
“I’ve been trying not t
o. Been putting your sister off for months so I could get this mess dealt with.” Rubbing a roughened hand across my jaw, I stare at the closed door. “I think this might have been the last straw, though.”
Shaking my head at Kol’s silence, I get the feeling he agrees and walks to the door just as Thea enters, shooting me a glare as she passes.
The evening started out so fucking promising. Now, I’m without the girl I’ve been too damn afraid to admit I love and an ex who is likely going to cause a shit-ton of fucking trouble for Em and me.
Staring down at my phone, I debate calling Ember. Needing her to know that Katrina and I have been over far longer than when I left the marriage.
I also recognize, she doesn’t need this shit storm in her life.
So, with a heavy heart, I decide to leave her be. Allow her emotions to settle while I get Katrina out of my life once and for all.
A fresh start is what Ember and I need.
I just hope she can forgive me for the decision I’m making without her input.
1
Ember
Three Months Later.
Heartache.
Betrayal.
Depression.
They’re my constant companions. Sitting on my shoulder like little devils, taunting me anytime I take a full breath. Infiltrating my soul when I experience one single second of happiness.
I feel the loss of Noah like a missing limb. He isn't just the man I've loved for so many years, he's an extension of myself. Hidden for so long that when I was able to have him, even for those few days, hope blossomed, and I thought this would be my happily ever after.
After discovering he was a married man, his silence has spoken louder than if he were yelling from rooftops. I've waited, for days, to hear anything from him.
A phone call.
A text.
Smoke signals.
Anything at all to say, we’re not over.
For Noah Brennan, I would have waited forever.
Until the end of time, I would have been his.
Now, I’m an empty shell of a woman who is just beginning life.
Kol and Arsen raised me after our parents died. I was the surprise baby, so I’m a decade younger than Kol, but they never treated me like an inconvenience.
Even so, I’ve been waiting a long time to ease my brothers' burden. And over the past few months, I’ve been forced to slap on a brave face, so they don’t realize how much Noah’s rejection is eating at me.
I feel slightly ill as I walk up the path to Kol and Thea’s house for a birthday dinner for Kol. Every year, for as long as I can remember, we’ve always had family dinners on birthdays. Friends always included.
Which means Noah will be here.
My stomach is already doing flips, making me nauseous, knowing I’ll be in the same room as him. Listening to his voice. Looking into his soulful eyes that fill me with a desperate kind of passion.
“Oh god,” I stammer out as I slowly walk up the steps to their door, debating turning around to leave.
My options are stolen as the door opens, and my sweet nephew Jake stands there. “Aunty Ember!” He flies into me, almost knocking us both on our asses.
“You grew again!” I laugh with him. I love this kid so much. He went through hell before Arsen and Marina adopted him. They all lucked out finding each other, and now, he’s thriving.
A blush works up his cheeks at my comment. “I’m almost taller than Mom now.” We share a quiet chuckle before entering the house.
“Hey, kid.” Arsen wraps me in a tight hug as Jake runs off. “You’ve lost weight.” His comment stings. Not because it’s insulting, but more the reason behind it.
“I think you’re just getting bigger in your old age,” I tease him instead. Not wanting him to worry about me.
He eyes me critically before chuckling and shaking his head. “Sassy as ever, I see.”
“Ember!” Thea and Marina squeal at the same time. Seeing how far Thea has come since Kol barged his way into her life makes my heart happy. She loves so freely now.
“Girls, how are you?” They share a look, and I know they think the same as Arsen. I’ve lost weight. I look like crap, and the bags under my eyes, either from too much sleep or a lack thereof, are weighing heavily on me.
I’ve been avoiding Thea and Kol for so long now that I’m sure my appearance is shocking to her.
“Is everything alright, Em?” Marina wraps an arm around my shoulders, and the way she speaks to me, holds me, has tears surfacing. It’s the motherly embrace I’ve been missing in my life for far too long.
“Not here. Not now,” I tell both. With another shared look and a skeptical nod, they leave me alone.
“Kol’s out back,” Marina says, and I immediately go in search of him.
“Wait!” Thea calls. “So is–” She doesn’t need to finish her warning. I see Noah sitting next to my brother, cold beer in one hand…
…a dark-haired woman in the other.
Before I can spin around and rush to the bathroom, Kol notices me and calls my name. “Ember!” Noah’s head pops up, and I see guilt quickly flash in his eyes before he masks any emotion.
He looks good.
Too good.
I look like shit.
Approaching my brother, I swallow the bile working its way up my throat. This is embarrassing enough without me vomiting all over the yard because I can’t stand that the man I love is here with another woman.
I'm not sure if I expected him to be as miserable as me or if I wished him to be happy, and now, I’ll never know. He doesn’t look exhausted from lack of sleep. He doesn’t look heartbroken.
He’s moved on.
And I can’t.
“Happy birthday, Kol.” I force a smile on my face, and I know he can see right through it but doesn’t say a word. He knows I’ve been struggling with Noah’s distance. His silence.
“Thanks for coming.” He hugs me tight, whispering, “It’s not what you think,” before pulling away, but I just don’t care anymore. I can’t.
For my health and my sanity, I have to let Noah go. Like I should have done the first time he rejected me.
Clearing my throat, I ignore Noah and the woman on his arm to focus on the lie I’m about to tell. “I can’t stay. I haven’t been feeling well, and I’d hate to get anyone sick.”
Kol’s eyes narrow, and I know he can sense my deceit. “You sure? Maybe Arsen and I should drive you home.”
That’s code for they want to know what’s going on with me. My entire life, they’ve looked out for me. Fought every battle. But this is one time, I have to handle it on my own.
“No, stay. Enjoy your party. Thea has your gift. I’m going to grab some tea and soak in a nice hot bath before hitting the bed. I have to go out of town the day after tomorrow for a recital, so I need to get better.” But I’ll never be better.
I’ll never love again.
“If you’re sure…”
“I am. Happy birthday, Kol.” Stepping up on my tiptoes, I kiss his cheek and slowly back away. Avoiding looking at Noah again, I leave through the side gate, not wanting to lie to everyone else.
I’m almost to my car when I hear the gate again, and I know it’s him.
“Em, baby, wait,” he calls tenderly, and my body wants to halt. I want to listen to him. But I can’t. “Ember!” He snaps my name with more authority, and my steps falter.
Unlocking my car, I don’t stop until the vehicle is between us. Before a word can escape, I notice the woman standing at the side of the house, peeking around. Not like she’s trying to hide, but like she doesn’t want to interfere.
“I can’t, Noah. Not now. Not ever,” I tell him. No emotion can be detected on his face.
“You don’t look very well, Ember. Have you been to a doctor?” I can’t make sense of him.
“I’m fine, Noah. Go back to her.” I wave a hand back at the woman.
“Cali. Her name is Cali.” His words are like a knife thro
ugh my sternum, shredding through my heart.
“She’s stunning.” Painfully so, if I’m honest.
“Yeah, she is,” he confirms, and I think I’m going to be sick. “Can we talk?”
Sighing, my head drops, and my eyes close. I can’t look back up at him as I tell him, “No, Noah. We can’t. We have nothing left.”
And right there, on the street, in front of my brother’s house, I leave my splintered heart on the asphalt as I drive away.
Noah
I’ve always been a little intense. Quick to anger. Slow to forgive.
Never have I fucked up nearly as much as I have with Ember. From the first time I met her until five minutes ago when she went speeding off with tears streaming down her face, I keep fucking up.
“She doesn’t look very well, Noah,” Cali, my cousin, comments beside me. She's all the family I have left. I brought her because I knew Ember would be here. I wanted her to meet the only other important woman in my life.
If fucking backfired because she thought Cali and me were an item.
“She’s lost weight. A lot of it. And she’s not sleeping.” Depression has taken Ember hostage, and it’s all my fault.
“I could kill Trina for you if you want,” Cali offers, and I’m not entirely sure she isn’t serious.
“Much as I’d like to take you up on that offer, I can’t. I’d have to arrest you.”
She pats my arm. “Sure you would, Noah. Go after her.”
Fuck do I want to. Need to. I want to show Ember that I haven’t forgotten about her. That everything I’ve done has been for her, but I'm a fucking idiot who handled it all wrong.
