“Sit down!”
Glancing at the clock on the stove, I realized I should’ve been at work by then. It was probably Kristi or Alesha trying to find out where I was. Dammit, I hoped someone at least realized I wasn’t there and watched over my kids. And maybe notified someone that I wasn’t there. That would be nice.
With that in mind, I grabbed myself by my big girl pants and tried to think of something to stall her.
“If you and Maddox were together, why would he have me move in?” I tried to act confused, not confrontational.
“Because everything backfired. You didn’t listen, he was a sappy fool, and neither of you took me seriously.” Jesus, she’d been the one responsible?
“You did that to my car? And the eggs on my new car? And the pictures?” Horror filled me as I remembered all the things that’d happened.
“In the end, it was less the threat than the fact that I hated you. Now I’m sick to death of you plaguing me. Since the day my brother died.”
She began rambling, and I fought not to watch the clock.
When my phone started ringing again, I hesitated. “Do you want me to go get that?”
“No!” She looked torn. Maybe she was thinking about whether she should leave it there or bring it with us.
It stopped, then started again. For several minutes, it rang off and on. We sat there in silence.
“Let’s go,” she finally said.
As I was pushing the chair back, it scraped on the floor. The sound made her jump, and the gun wavered in her hand.
Sweet baby Jesus, don’t let her shoot me here in his home.
In the moment that I might die, I was worried about him having a mess to clean up. Where the hell was my brain?
The garage door opening had me swiveling my head to see who it was. My stomach bottomed out when I saw Styx step in. Behind him, I could see the garage door was open. Knowing I hadn’t heard it open, I wondered if he had somehow left it open when he left.
“Sabrina? What’s going on?” Sabrina? Things started to click in my head. Bri was the Sabrina that he worked with. What the actual fricken-frack? And how the heck was he home? He was supposed to be at work.
Then it dawned on me. “You’re a nurse?” I asked in surprise.
“After Billy died, I switched to nursing so I could save people. Since you didn’t even try,” she spat nastily.
“Bri, I did, but there was nothing I could do,” I cried.
“You’re a liar! You take away everyone I love! You’re such a selfish whore! I hate you. The world would be a better place without you! You’ve taken everything,” she screamed at me. My breath hitched when the gun in her hands shook.
“Sabrina. Calm down. Let’s leave Gwen out of this. How about if she leaves and you and I talk?” Styx tried to reason with her.
“No! Because she has you fooled. She does that. She twists everyone into believing she’s so innocent and sweet. She’s a manipulative bitch, and I don’t trust you, because she’s already got you brainwashed.” Her eyes were wild as she yelled at him. It made me wonder how she’d held her crazy together long enough to function as a nurse.
“Well, then that’s all the more reason to get her out of here. You talk to me. You make me see what’s going on. Just me and you. Okay?” His voiced never wavered. He sounded calm and reasonable, whereas I was on the verge of peeing myself.
Except she ignored him, focusing on me. “You took everything. You took his time, you took his future, you even took his school and his dreams! You stole his entire life!” Angry tears coursed down her face, leaving ugly black trails.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw confusion flash briefly over Styx’s face as he looked from her to me.
“I only wanted to honor his dreams, Bri. I never meant to disrespect him or his memory. I loved him. I never meant to hurt him like that. It wasn’t supposed to end that way, but we were young, and a long-distance relationship never would’ve worked. I thought I was doing what was best for us both.” Sad tears followed my confession.
“Shut up!” she shrieked. The gun shook with her volatile emotions, and I froze.
“Sabrina! Look at me!” Styx demanded.
Flashing eyes obeyed his commanding tone, but the gun stayed trained on me. I held my breath.
“Maddox,” she cried. “You were supposed to be mine. Our relationship was barely getting started before she came into the picture. I love you. But just like Billy, she stole you. She ruined it, like she ruins everything.”
“Then let’s get her out of here. We don’t need her. Put the gun down and talk to me. We can work this out. I had no idea how you felt. You never told me. You should’ve told me, Sabrina,” he quietly chided. “Now, Gwen, get out of here. I don’t want you here. Sabrina and I have things to discuss.”
Though I knew he was playing her to try to get me to safety, I hated hearing those words. Hated them as much as the thought of him being there with her unprotected.
Instead of leaving like he urged me, I reached for his hand to make him see I wasn’t abandoning him to her insanity. “No,” I whispered as I struggled to breathe and crumbled to my knees.
Belatedly, I realized there’d been a deafening noise. My ears rang as I slowly lowered my gaze to my chest to see why I couldn’t breathe. My head swam as I fought to suck air into my burning lungs. The dark red was spreading at an alarming rate.
Before I knew it, I was facedown on the floor, unable to move. My words were trapped in my head as I stared at Styx on top of Bri.
Blackness started to close in around the edges of my vision as he rushed toward me and turned me to my back. He was talking on his phone. I heard him giving his address, talking about an entry and exit wound and a bunch of other crap.
His words were fuzzy as he pushed harder on my chest. I barely felt it. I was numb.
And oh, so cold.
Funny, I never thought my life would end like that.
“Brand New Numb”—Motionless In White
I’d seen a lot of things over the years. Between combat and the shit that came through the ED, I’d become somewhat desensitized to trauma and gore. Whether that was good or bad, I had no idea. What I did know was seeing the woman I loved bleeding out on the floor with a sucking chest wound had me fighting to keep my clinical side functioning.
Going through the appropriate motions to stabilize her the best I could, I waited. It seemed to take the paramedics forever to get there and take over. Once they did, my control began to unravel.
“You’ve gotten my statement; I’m going to the hospital with my wife.” I lied to the cop and followed the paramedics as they rolled the gurney to the ambulance. They allowed me to ride along, and I was thankful.
She didn’t regain consciousness the entire way. I was so worried; she’d lost so much blood. In my mind I could still see the deep red fluid soaking her hair where it fanned around her shoulder. It was obscene, and anger began to settle in.
For the millionth time since Sabrina had shot Gwen, I regretted that I hadn’t killed her. She’d been loaded up in a second ambulance for assessment before taking her to jail. I hoped I at least broke her damn jaw when I punched her to knock her ass out.
“Once we get here, you know the routine, man. You’re going to have to sit out in the waiting room until they get her situated. She may go straight to surgery as soon as they figure out what all they need to do.” The EMT was taking to me, but my eyes never left her.
“I know how it goes.” Didn’t mean I liked it. We’d gone straight to the ED I worked in. The thought that I could’ve been working when she came in if Alesha hadn’t called Truth turned my stomach. I’d have gone into shock if she’d rolled in on my shift.
Alesha hadn’t had my number, so she called Truth, telling me I was right about them. Truth had called me to let me know she hadn’t shown up for work. If I lost my job because I told them I had a family emergency and hauled ass, I didn’t give two fucks.
Thank God I had, t
oo. All the lucky breaks that we’d gotten that day blew my mind.
She was rushed into Trauma One, and I waited helpless outside the door as one of my coworkers squeezed my shoulders as he went by. Everything was a blur after that.
It wasn’t long before all my brothers were pouring in the ED while I stood there helpless, even though this was my job. I didn’t even question how they knew to go to the hospital.
“Styx, brother, how is she?” Smoke hugged me as the rest waited around us.
Shaking my head, I could only stare at him. She’d been dead at least once. They didn’t tell me if it was more, and I didn’t ask. That was almost more than I could take, and I liked to think of myself as a tough motherfucker.
Then something that hadn’t happened in forever. Everything hit me, and I lost it. Sobbing, I crumbled, and Smoke’s strong arms caught me.
Was this what love felt like? Because if so, it was painful. The thought of losing her had me unraveling. Shattered. Lost.
“Bro, you know your coworkers are doing everything they can for her. Do you need a drink? Something to eat?”
The thought of putting anything in my stomach make me sick. I shook my head.
Terri came out from the trauma room, and I watched her make a beeline for our group. She stopped in front of me.
“Maddox, they’ve stabilized her, but we need to transfer her to Dell Seton. She needs a higher level of care than we’re able to give her here.” I knew the routine.
“Okay, I’m heading there now. Tell them if they want to fire me, I don’t care. I’m going.”
“They understand, and we have it covered. Go be with your girl. I’m going to keep you in my prayers.” What she didn’t say but I saw in her eyes was that she was going to need it.
Fuck.
Slice had driven his truck, anticipating me needing a ride. Thank God. I’d never have made it on a bike. I was a fucking mess.
Everyone followed us as we headed down.
What I loved about my club was that they really were like family. Everyone came and filled the OR waiting room with me. Raiven even showed up for a little bit while she had Mattie watch the kids and brought us all food.
“She’s going to be okay. I have faith,” Raiven said as she hugged me with her brightly tatted arms. Hair pulled up in one of her signature pinup styles, she pulled back and held me at arm’s length. “This is the one, huh?”
Running a hand over my face, then smoothing my beard, I fought all the emotions roiling through me before I looked her in the eye. “Yeah.”
Her smile was brilliant. “Good. I’m excited to corrupt her in all the best ways.” She gave me a playful wink before kissing my cheek. “I gotta get back to the kiddos. You need anything else before I go?”
Looking around for nothing in particular, I returned my gaze to hers. “No, but thanks again, sweetheart. You go give my niece and nephew my love. Mattie too, even though she’s getting too old for that.” My smile fell a little flat.
“I got you. Don’t worry about us, you concentrate on your ol’ lady.” With a last soft smile, her hand reached out to Lock’s outstretched one and they walked hand in hand to the elevator. It hurt to watch them, so I turned my back to pace some more.
“Bro, you’re gonna wear holes in that carpet,” Slice said from where he was slouched in a chair. Truth sat next to him, his forearms resting on his thighs. He looked up when I stopped in front of them.
“I can’t help it. I can’t sit still.” My head dropped. A firm hand clasped my shoulder and squeezed.
Looking over, I met Smoke’s gaze and knew this was hard on him too. He’d lost his wife to a drunk driver when Mattie was less than a month old. Happened right in front of him when they got out to check their tire that was going flat. So the entire situation wasn’t identical, but the sense of loss was renewed.
We didn’t speak; we silently shared our pain.
It seemed like a million hours before an exhausted-looking surgeon came through the doors. Still in surgical scrubs, he looked at our party. The expression he had was unreadable other than the weary aspect of it.
“Mr. Wright?” He addressed our group, and I stepped forward. His gaze took in my blood-covered scrubs I’d yet to change out of. He motioned me to the side, and I wasted no time getting to him.
He proceeded to tell me that they had everything temporarily stabilized but that she’d need another surgery soon with the orthopedic surgeon to plate her clavicle and scapula. The bullet had luckily hit one bone and ricocheted to hit the other, but missed her heart and any arteries. They’d repaired the soft tissue damage the best they could. He explained the rest of it, damage and recuperation, and I listened. Nothing I didn’t know and understand, but it being on my woman made me sick.
“All in all, she was incredibly lucky that you were there when it happened. Without your prompt actions, I wouldn’t have had a patient to operate on. It was a miracle that the damage was as minor as it was. She was a very lucky woman.” We shook hands, and I thanked him for everything he’d done. He nodded and returned through the doors he’d entered from.
For several days she was out of it. In and out of her second surgery, and high as hell on pain meds. I’d stayed and taken care of her. Helped her get in and out of bed to walk, bathed her, and helped her eat when she couldn’t do things with one arm.
I’d held her when she cried, or when she woke in pain or from a nightmare and fought my own tears every step of the way.
But I was proud of her. She was tough, and she didn’t quit even when I knew she was hurting. Even when she thought she was bleeding to death because her wounds were draining.
“They already gave me three transfusions, I don’t want to waste that and bleed to death,” she’d said as tears ran down her face. I’d kissed her lips and reassured her.
“It’s normal drainage, babe. I promise. If it wasn’t, you know I’d have those fucking doctors in here STAT. Okay?”
She’d nodded.
I’d braided her hair one day to keep it out of her way, and she’d looked at me like I was crazy. “What? Who do you think braids mine when I pull it back?”
Wide-eyed, she’d shrugged, then winced at the pain. Through clenched eyes and gritted teeth, she said, “I don’t know, I thought maybe some Viking chick named Helga came over and did it.”
“Helga is German, so it would have to be Dagmar or something,” I teased.
She laughed, then chewed my ass for making her laugh, because it hurt.
Each night I slept on the pullout next to her so I could hold her hand.
And each night I thanked the good Lord above for sparing her.
“Better Days”—Breaking Benjamin
“Styx, you need to go and video it for me.” I’d been stubbornly insisting he go to the Straight Wicked Concert with the club, but he’d just as stubbornly refused.
“Hell, no! Are you crazy? I’m not leaving you here in the hospital and going to a fucking concert.” He was looking at me like I was out of my mind. The thing was, I was doing tons better, and if I kept doing this well, I’d be discharged soon. Except even if I was discharged right that minute, there was no way I’d be up to going to a concert. Oh, and my doctor would have my ass.
I’d been so excited to go too.
“We’ll have the guys do some live videos, and I’ll watch it here with you,” he tried to bargain.
Pouting and grumbling because I was tired of hurting and not being able to use my left arm, I glared at him. “That’s not the same.”
“I don’t care, I’m not going. It’s good enough for me. Next year when they come back, we’ll go,” he replied.
“But you won’t get to meet the band. They hooked you up with a great deal. It won’t be the same,” I insisted.
“End of discussion. I already gave my tickets away to one of the guys at the tattoo shop Raiven works at.” He shut me up with that.
“Fine,” I conceded. Barely. “So, do you think Raiven will tattoo so
mething to camouflage my scars?” I asked as I picked at the blanket and tried not to move too much.
“When they’re healed enough, I know she will.”
“’Kay.”
“Gwen, I love you. I’m staying by your side through this. Please don’t be mad at me for not leaving,” he pleaded.
“I’m not. I just feel guilty. Like it’s my fault all this happened and screwed things up.”
“What the fuck?”
“If I had taken everything seriously, maybe she would have been uncovered before it got to this.” My throat still hurt when I swallowed, thanks to the tube I’d had down it in the beginning. He saw me wince and handed me a bite of ice chips to soothe it.
“Thanks,” I said after they melted and ran down my throat.
“You want me to have the nurse get you another throat lozenge?” he asked, trying to be helpful.
My nose wrinkled in distaste. “No, thanks. Those are disgusting.”
By the time the concert kicked off, we set up his tablet and watched the live videos the guys were posting for us. It was a kick butt concert, and I couldn’t even imagine being there in person. The guys and Raiven all waved at me and Styx several times and tried to tell us how much they wished we were there. It was so loud, we barely made out what they were saying.
Laughing at them as they made their way out of the stadium, we closed down the tablet. It was late and I was tired. I’d actually dozed off a couple of times during the concert. Styx acted like he didn’t notice, but I knew he did.
Using my pain button, I loaded myself up and drifted off to sleep as Styx chastely kissed me.
“Hey, babe, you might wanna wake up.” Styx’s voice interrupted the vivid naked dream I was having, and it irritated me. Moaning, I grumped and scrunched up my face as I fought to open my eyes.
“What time is it?” Blinking at the too-bright light coming from the bathroom, I rubbed my eyes with my good arm.
“Two in the morning.”
“What? Why’d you wake me up? Are you nuts?”
Styx and Stones: A Demented Sons MC Texas Novel Page 23
