by Kris Bryant
“Come closer to the edge.” I was impressed with how I was controlling the situation and how well she responded. She scooted until she was at the edge. The angle still wasn’t great and we were both frustrated. I pulled her off the desk, kissed her hard, then turned her around. She gasped when I bent her over the desk. I had to not think and just let instinct take over. We were both too aroused to think. I spread her legs apart with mine and slipped two fingers into her. She groaned in appreciation. “Shh,” I reminded her. She grabbed the front of the desk for better leverage and pushed back into my hand. I placed one hand on her bare ass to hold her down and pushed into her, slowly and as deep as I could go.
“More,” she whispered hoarsely. I slipped a third finger inside her and we both moaned. She was so tight. I leaned over and nipped at her waist and the small of her back while her body grew accustomed to my third finger. “Now, Lily.”
That was my cue. I pumped into her, hard, afraid I was hurting her, but her soft moans of appreciation and the fact that she begged me not to stop kept me going. Her legs stiffened and she bit down on her forearm to keep from crying out when her orgasm hit. Her whole body tensed up, her core squeezed me, and she collapsed on the desk. I was frozen in awe. I stood over her and rubbed her back while her body settled.
She started laughing quietly. “Well, I wasn’t quite expecting that.”
I backed away immediately. “I’m so sorry, Hope. I didn’t mean…”
She rolled over and stared at me. She didn’t care that she was sprawled naked in full daylight. “Are you kidding me? That was fantastic. You should come by my office more. I always knew my office had potential with you in it.” She pulled up her panties and pants and sat back on the desk. I watched as she fastened her bra into place and buttoned up her shirt. “Come here.” I stood between her legs again. I was slightly shaking from the intensity of the moment, afraid I did something wrong or was too rough with her. She pulled my arms around her so I was close. “That felt incredible, Lily. It was perfect. It was what I wanted, and what I needed.” She kissed me until the tension left my body.
“I was worried I went too far.” I touched my forehead to hers.
“I loved it. I really did.” I felt a smile tug at the corner of my mouth. “I need to get back to work, but I don’t want to.”
We both jumped when Hope’s office phone rang. She cleared her throat and answered it. “Okay, I’ll be down there in a few minutes.” She put her arms around me and pulled me close. “I have to go. Will I see you later?”
“Sure, if you can. I’m free.” I refrained from blurting out different options. I needed to give her space and let her come to me. Today was incredible, but it also exposed my neediness. I hoped to salvage some of my integrity by giving her the option to decide if she wanted to come to my place, or wanted me at hers. I followed her out and told her to call me when she was free. She nodded, winked, and headed to her appointment. I stepped into the bathroom to clean up and straighten my clothes. I smiled at myself in the mirror. I never thought I would be somebody’s girlfriend. I definitely didn’t think I had it in me to go to her work, bend her over her desk, and take what I wanted while giving her the pleasure she desired.
Chapter Twenty-one
The refrigerator was stocked. The house was clean, and I even brushed Clio and got him a little bow tie to wear. He said no in his special way that involved claws and some hissing. I gave up. He batted it around the floor until it ended up underneath the cabinet. He gave up, too. I had a television installed in my bedroom so that if we never wanted to leave the bedroom, we didn’t have to. Our staycation was going to be perfect. No interruptions. I was ready to cuddle with my girlfriend for the next forty-eight hours. I expected her at nine, but she surprised me by showing up at eight fifteen.
“You’re early.” I pulled her inside. I kissed her soundly until she relaxed against me.
“That’s okay, right?” she said as she pulled away from me to shut the door. We had a habit of making out in the doorway, much to my neighbors’ surprise.
“It’s wonderful.” I grinned at her for no other reason than I was happy to see her.
“What?” She looked down at her outfit and then smoothed down her hair. “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing. You look great. I’m just happy you’re here.” I grabbed her bag and set it down beside the couch. Clio was perched on the armrest, like always, to greet her.
“How is this handsome guy? Hello, big boy.” She leaned down and patted his head. I rolled my eyes at his gentleness toward her. She didn’t know the battle Clio and I had an hour before. She would, hopefully, find my battle scars soon.
“If you want, I can make us dinner. Or I can order from across the street. You decide. You are my guest, so whatever you’re hungry for, I’ll make it or order it.”
“I’d rather get started on the cuddling, so how about you order Chinese and we can relax until it gets here.” She sat on the couch and pulled me down next to her.
I grabbed my phone, punched in our order, and set the phone on the table. I gave her my undivided attention, as did Clio, who climbed over both of us until Hope petted him. He wasn’t going to be allowed into the bedroom later, or this weekend at all.
Hope told me about her day and how the concert was pushed back a week because of both student and staff summer vacations. She said it was going to be the best one yet. Miles was going to play a song with Tyson, which was something I was looking forward to. And one of their new students was ready for a solo. The excitement was written all over her face.
“Do you ever go on vacation, or is the Leading Note everything to you?” I was curious when her last real break was. I was even more curious to find out who it was with.
“Really, I love it so much it doesn’t feel like work.” She held my hand and rubbed my palm with her thumb.
“When was your last vacation?”
“I went to Vermont with my ex-girlfriend about four years ago.” She shrugged apologetically.
I found that it stung just a little bit even though it was a long time ago. “That sounds nice.” I gritted my teeth and kept a small smile plastered in place. This was jealousy. I couldn’t help but wonder if she and her girlfriend did the same things we did.
“What about you? When was your last vacation?”
I snorted. My last vacation was twelve years ago when my grandparents took me to Florida to play on the beach. I hated the sun, I hated the sand, and I hated that everyone in my life was trying to force me to be a normal teenager. I’d just gone through a major meltdown, and nobody cared. Well, my parents did, only because it forced them to focus their attention elsewhere like getting jobs and their own lives. My grandparents thought I could just stand up, dust myself off, and be okay. After that disastrous trip, they decided I needed more therapy. “A long time ago. I went to Florida with my grandparents. It was okay.”
“You didn’t take any trips in college? No wild and crazy spring breaks?” She bumped her shoulder against me, forcing me to put my arm around her. She snuggled up close.
“No. I pretty much went to school full-time. Even on breaks I worked on projects. I didn’t have any friends in college, not that I would have gone anywhere with them.” I wasn’t sad. It was just a matter of fact.
“My college was kind of crazy. I worked a lot, but I did have tons of friends. I’m sorry you didn’t. You are such a nice person.” She squeezed my hand.
“Thank you, but I didn’t really miss out. If I’d met people like you and your friends in college, maybe I would have been more interested in a social life.” I kissed the back of her hand. The intercom buzzed, signaling dinner had arrived. I’d ordered us large portions of orange chicken, fried rice, and lo mein with pork because I knew we’d nibble on it later. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. I have a surprise for you back in the bedroom.”
Hope lifted her eyebrow at me and smirked. “Tell me it’s something fun to try in bed.”
I blushed and s
tammered nonsensical words. “Um, no. Nothing like that, but something else. I can show you after dinner.” I looked down at my plate. I wanted to slip under the table and disappear.
“You’re adorable, Lily. So innocent, yet only about certain things.” She looked at me and winked.
I blushed harder. I thought about Wednesday in her office and bending her over the desk. That was so unlike anything I could ever imagine, but now that it had happened, I couldn’t stop visualizing us in different positions, in different rooms, in public places. I was obsessing about it. I’d let my instincts take over the other day with her and was handsomely rewarded. I decided to follow my instincts again.
“Wednesday was nice,” I said like it was a walk in the park. I took a bite of orange chicken and chewed, not breaking eye contact with Hope.
“You called me love in my office,” she said.
I choked on that piece of chicken and jumped up from the table. I did what? Hope raced over to my side. She patted my back as I coughed to dislodge the food that was stuck in my throat. Little did she know my heart and stomach were there, too. I replayed the scene. I sure as fuck did call her love.
I waved her off as if her smacks weren’t helping, but I really just needed a moment to calm down and let everything settle. I walked to the window and looked out while my stomach returned to its rightful place. My heart wasn’t budging, though. Hope handed me a glass a water and I drank it in ten seconds. I took a deep breath and turned to her.
“I said what?”
“It was a caught-up-in-the-moment kind of thing. Don’t worry about it.” She stood beside me and rubbed my back.
It was soothing, but I was so on edge from what she said that I couldn’t appreciate it. I took a step away from her. A flash of disappointment crossed her face, but she nodded at me and retreated back to the table. I was such an insensitive jerk. This could have been my moment. The moment when I told Hope that I loved her and maybe she would say it back to me, but no, I had to brush her off like her comfort wasn’t appreciated. The special moment was gone no matter what I did to try to salvage it. I walked back over to the table.
“I’m sorry. You caught me off guard.”
“Are you okay?” She seemed genuinely concerned.
“Yeah, that was a tough swallow.” I cowardly decided to ignore what she said and grasped at anything else to discuss. “So, I tried to dress Clio up for you tonight, but he wouldn’t cooperate.” Lame. “I’ll show you the battle scars later.” I was so bad at this.
“Dress up how?” At least she played along.
“I got him this super cute yellow and blue bow tie, but he thought I was trying to choke him and put up quite the fight. He shoved it under the cabinet somewhere.” I pushed my plate away from me. My appetite was gone. “Look. I’m sorry I’m bad at girlfriend stuff.” I held my hand up when she began protesting. “I’m learning and I know I’m not easy, but I really am trying. My social skills and how I communicate are awful. I know this, but please know that I’m trying.”
Hope stood and came over to me. She knelt in front of me and took my hands in hers. “Listen to me. I knew going in that you’re shy and you don’t have a lot of experience hanging around people. I’m glad you’re not silver-tongued and can just spew out the perfect thing to say. As bad as this is to say, it’s actually kind of fun to see how you react in certain situations. I shouldn’t have sprung what you said Wednesday on you. That wasn’t fair. The time will come and then we can joke about this.” She cupped my chin and kissed me softly.
“You are too good to me, Hope.”
“Are you done eating for now? We can box this up and try again in about an hour when we’re both hungry again. You know what they say about Chinese food.”
I smiled. She shooed me away to the couch and cleaned up. I sat and closed my eyes. Clio jumped on the couch and curled up on my lap. Even though he favored Hope, he always knew when I was having one of my meltdown moments. He calmed me. By the time Hope joined us, my heart rate was back to normal and I could look her in the eye.
“Thank you.”
“It’s no problem. Tell me about this surprise you have for me.” She sat on the couch next to me.
“Wait. It’s a surprise I have to show you.” I motioned for her to get up.
She groaned. “Really? You couldn’t have said this before I got comfy?”
I stood and pulled her up. “It’s really not that big a deal.” I grabbed her bag with my free hand and playfully pulled her into my bedroom.
Her eyes locked on the television. “Oh, this is nice, Lily. We’ll never leave this room. Ever.”
Hope always said the right thing.
“Go put your pajamas on and I’ll find us something to watch.” I found the remotes for the television and the sound system. I removed some of the pillows from the bed, put Clio outside the door and closed it, and crawled under the covers.
“Honestly, I didn’t pack pajamas, so I hope this works,” Hope said.
I looked at her and my jaw almost hit the floor. She was wearing black panties and a black lacy camisole. Hope D’Marco was stunning in black. Whatever movie I found for us to watch was forgotten the second my hands touched her body.
***
“Are you sure you have to leave in an hour?” I playfully whined.
Hope was tucked in the crook of my arm and we’d just finished breakfast in bed with one another for dessert. It was almost noon on Sunday, time for her to get up, get ready, and spend some time with her family. It was their weekend ritual and I didn’t want to interrupt it. She invited me along, but I quickly declined.
“Come shower with me. We’ve been in bed so long, I think I’ve forgotten how to move.” She dragged me from the bed.
“Oh, I think you moved just fine all weekend long.” My mind flashed back to all the different positions we tried, liked, and repeated over and over again. I was sore everywhere, but I wasn’t going to let it slow me down. I wasn’t even going to let Hope know my body was tested.
“Come on. We’ll conserve water.” She winked at me and tugged my hand until I caved and got off the bed.
“Remember what happened the last time we conserved water?”
She answered by kissing my neck, gently biting the soft skin.
I shivered. “I guess you do remember.”
“How could I forget? You were so delicious pressed against the back of the shower.”
I shuddered again. Last night, Hope turned me and bent me over slightly so she could taste me at a different angle. It was so decadent and I felt so wanton that I came within just a few minutes. I’d had eight orgasms that weekend, and number nine was going to happen soon. She pulled me under the stream of hot water and ran her hands over my body to ensure every part of me got wet. She ran her fingers up and down my slit, then slipped between the swollen folds. I moaned my appreciation.
“Remember, you’re the one on a schedule,” I said.
“Remember, you’re the one who can come in thirty seconds.”
“Checkmate.” I spread my legs to give her better access and leaned back so the water sprayed over my hair and down my back. Every part of me felt fantastic. Hope was right. It took less than a minute to feel the first quivers of my orgasm. She slipped a finger inside me and continued to rub her thumb on my clit. I grabbed her shoulders and pulled her to me when I came.
“I can’t tell if I’m jealous or if I’m the best lover in the world because you come so hard and so fast.” She slipped out of me.
“Best lover in the world. Best lover to me.” We both smiled, knowing she had been my only lover. I whined again when she turned off the water. “Are we done here?”
“In the shower? Yes. I can’t have orgasms standing, and I definitely want another before I have to leave. Let’s go back to bed.”
She handed me a towel and I quickly dried off.
I knew we were pressed for time, but I needed to taste her because I wouldn’t again until next weekend. The concert
was Friday, so Hope would be busy with extra practices all week. I crawled on top of her slowly, touching her everywhere. She grabbed my towel, opened it, and pulled me into her. For the next twenty minutes, we communicated, but not with words. I missed her warmth when she left the bed to get ready.
“Are you sure you don’t want to join me?” She leaned back to look at me from the vanity. She held her mascara brush in one hand and dabbed her finger on her bottom lip to smooth out her lipstick with the other. Her hair was pulled back in a long ponytail. I took my time appreciating her form. She rolled her eyes at me. “So, I guess that’s a no.”
“One day I might. Baby steps, okay?” I pulled my T-shirt over my head. I wanted to at least walk her to the door.
“Have you seen my phone?” Hope picked her towel up from the chair and shook it. She made her way around the room, lifting pillows and piles of clothes we’d discarded.
I joined in but gave up the search after about ten seconds. I picked up my phone and dialed her number.
“What are you doing?”
“I’m calling you. Your phone has to be here somewhere. We’ll hear it.” I smiled at her.
“No, Lily. Don’t.”
It was too late. From underneath my pillow came the chords of “Stars at Twilight in A Flat Major.” It was slow and hauntingly beautiful. I’d forgotten how easily it stirred up my emotions. I knew the song by heart. I knew it because I wrote it and the recording was me playing it. Her ringtone for me was my own music. Well, Jillian Crest’s music. She stopped moving and stared at me, her eyes large with fear.
Another shift was taking place inside me, but this time, I was back onstage, and all the broken pieces I had painfully put back together over the years shattered. The blood rushed from my head and I was overcome with a cold so frightening I had to sit down.
