by Nique Luarks
“You have a wonderful weekend.” She handed me my bag.
Smiling, I grabbed it. “You too.” Stepping around Quindelle, I walked out of the store in search of Foot Locker.
“You were going to shoot her, Chance?” Love cracked up. “True has destroyed you.”
I giggled, taking a bite of ice cream. “You know I can’t fight.”
She laughed harder. “You don’t know that. You’ve never had to fight. Yo’ ass going straight for the kill.”
I chuckled.
“Yep, True is definitely your best friend.”
After buying Chase and Chasity way too many pairs of shoes, I left Foot Locker and stopped at Lush. There, Love called and told me Quindelle had called True and told him I had disrespected her. After she congratulated me for sticking up for myself, I invited her to meet me for ice cream. It was an invitation I was happy I had extended because, since we’d met up ten minutes ago, Love had been making jokes nonstop.
“She really tried to play the victim, though. True had her on speaker, talkin’ ’bout you embarrassed her in front of her friend and the clerk.”
Shaking my head, I picked up my phone to text Haze back. After he showed up at True’s bar, I chose to take a step back from him as well. Just like it wasn’t cool for True’s friends to come at me, it wasn’t okay for mine to approach him.
I replied back to his “wyd” text.
Me: Out with my sister
“True told her ass she was lucky you didn’t shoot her ’cause you’d been on one lately.”
I smiled. Even when we weren’t talking, he knew me better than anybody else.
“Speaking of my ugly brother.” Love took a playful bite of her birthday cake slash peanut butter ice cream. I’d told her that was a weird combination, but she wasn’t trying to hear it.
Staring back at her, I grabbed my napkin. “What about him? And he’s not ugly.”
She rolled her eyes. “What are you guys doing?”
“Co-parenting.”
Love squinted. “That’s all?”
“That’s it, My Love,” I giggled.
Haze: I’m in town for the month...
Me: Ok
“He talks about you all the time. How he hopes you ain’t been overdoing it at work. He wants the baby to be a girl so bad,” Love cheesed. “It’s really cute. He’s already been getting the twins’ room together at his house.”
“Twins?” I scooped up some ice cream.
“I mean, technically, you and Nisha’s babies are twins.” She laughed out loud at her own corny joke.
“Ha-ha,” I frowned.
Love covered her mouth with a napkin. “I’m just playing,” she snickered. “But for real, he said if it’s a girl, he’s naming her Truleigh, you know, like ‘Truly’.”
I chuckled. “Yeah, he texted it to me. I told him we’d work on it.”
“And...” Love sang, “he’s letting you name Nisha’s baby. You gon’ stick with C’s or T’s?”
I shrugged. I wasn’t in a rush to name Nisha’s son, and if I was being completely honest, I really didn’t want to. My mom thought it was a great idea, though. My dad and I were on the same accord.
“I still can’t believe True bouta have four kids,” Love sighed. “But I’m happy one of them is by you,” she beamed.
At least one of us was.
True
“Daddy, Chase won’t let girls on the bouncy thing!” Chasity ran towards me full speed.
“Stop snitching,” Jaliyah chuckled.
Chasity jumped into my arms. “Can you get your son?” she asked as I scooped her up.
Handing her a small water off the table, I started for the bounce house. The inflated balloon took up a decent amount of space in the park. It had a huge slide and a basketball goal. It was big enough to fit all twenty kids at the party and a few grownups. Chase was going to make me kick his ass; he couldn’t even act right on his birthday.
As I neared the bounce house, I noticed all the girls were standing in the grass, and the boys were blocking the entrance.
“See,” Chasity pointed, pouting.
“Chase!” I shook my head. “Come here.”
“What I do?!” he yelled back, frowning. “She lyin’.”
“Yeah, she a liar,” Rajon’s little badass co-signed, bouncing up and down.
“C’mere, dude.” I put Chasity down, and she took off towards the playground, with the other little girls following.
Really, Chassy?
I watched her lead the way, giggling.
“What?” Chase asked, out of breath from running.
“Let yo’ sister play on the bounce house.”
He smacked his lips. “She keeps falling and getting stepped on.” He crossed his hands on top of his head. “I told them not to jump on her when she falls, but they kept doin’ it. I’ma knock them niggas out if they make my sister cry,” he said in a flat tone before looking towards the playground.
I chuckled. Chasity thought he was being a bully when Chase was just protecting her. He could fuck with her all day, but if anybody else tried, he wasn’t having it.
“There go Channy,” Chase grinned. “Chance!” he yelled, taking off.
My gaze followed him to my Jelly, and I smiled. She looked flyy in a pair of black biker shorts, a light pink Ivy Park bodysuit, and matching slides. She was sporting her real hair in its natural, curly state, stopping right above her shoulders. The shades on her face hid her eyes, but her smile was almost as bright as the sun. My eyes landed on her small bump, and my heart fluttered on some punk shit.
Chance was hitting the five-month mark, and unlike Nisha at the stage, she was showing. Chase wrapped his arms around her waist, then stepped back to rub her belly. They exchanged a few words, then Chasity ran up and hugged her. She handed Chance her water, then took off towards the playground again. Chase took a gift bag from her, then hooked his arm into hers as they headed in my direction.
“Wassup, Jelly?” I licked my lips.
My baby mama is bad, boah.
From her pretty, neon-colored toes to her shiny, fluffy hair.
“Hey, True.” She looked around. “This is a nice turnout, champ,” Chance stated, smiling down at Chase. “Is she here?”
I looked on in confusion.
Chase grinned bashfully. “Yeah, she over with Chasity.”
Chance coolly looked towards the playground, then back down at him. “All right.” They high fived. “She looks like her pictures. That’s always a good thing.”
Chase shook his head, still grinning. “You funny.”
“Son, go put your present on the table.” I tossed my chin up.
“A’ight.” He sprinted off.
“You a matchmaker now?” I touched her baby bump.
She giggled. “He really likes her. To the point where he made amends with her brother.”
“Oh, li’l mama got it like that?” My young life was growing up.
“How y’all been?” I placed both palms flat on her stomach. “Daddy’s baby is growing.” I rubbed slowly.
“Making me fat,” Chance sighed.
“You ain’t fat.”
She pouted. “I feel fat.”
I fixed her necklaces.
“True, I’m ready to sing happy birthday!” Jaliyah yelled across the park. “Tell the kids to come on!” She scowled with her hands her on hips.
Chance chuckled. “I’ll get the ladies.” She spun around and switched towards the playground.
“Did you talk to Chance?” Quindelle sat down next to me.
“About what?” I asked, resting my elbows on the picnic table.
She huffed. “About that shit she pulled at Nordstrom.”
I watched Chance blow bubbles with Tone and Erin’s oldest daughter, Sanaa.
“Nah, and I don’t plan to, so leave it the fuck alone. Leave her the fuck alone. Why I gotta keep repeating the same shit, Quin?” I faced her.
“She acts like she’s better than the rest of us.
”
“’Cause she is,” I told her with a straight face. “She makes her own paper, she looks out for my shorties, and my family loves her. And she bouta give me a baby.”
Quindelle’s face dropped.
“Leave her alone.”
“Fuck you, True.” She hopped up. “I’m out.”
I faced forward again.
“What’s wrong wit’ you?” Jaliyah asked, sipping from a red cup.
“Don’t worry about what’s wrong with me. And don’t be callin’ my daughter names,” Quindelle popped off.
“Fuck is you talkin’ ’bout?” Jaliyah continued sipping coolly from her cup.
“Chasity told me you called her a snitch. Just because she don’t know the prison rules you live by don’t make her a fuckin’ snitch.”
“Quindelle...” I looked up at her. “Take yo’ ass home.”
“I’m taking my daughter with me then. Y’all not ’bout to be mistreating my baby.”
I stood up and grabbed her by the back of the neck. “Do I need to walk you to your whip? Or I can drag you. The choice is yours, shorty.”
Jaliyah laughed, and that was all it took for Quindelle to steal off on her. Jaliyah sent a blow back, and I shoved her back, making her fall. Her crazy ass up jumped right back up and charged at Quindelle. She swung, and when her hit connected, I pushed her away harder. Her sister helped her up.
“Nah, let me at that bitch!” Quindelle hollered, gaining everyone’s attention.
Roughly snatching her hardheaded ass by the front of her tank top, I pulled her towards the parking lot.
“Let me go, True!” she screamed, trying to yank free. “Let me the fuck go.” Her body twisted, and she fell. Grabbing her hair, I yanked her through the grass, kicking and crying.
“True!” Chance yelled, nearing us. “Stop!”
Quindelle continued kicking and screaming. Since she had on a skirt, her ass was out.
When Chance reached like she wanted to break it up, I stopped moving. “Jelly, move back.”
“Chasity is here, True. Don’t do this.” Her eyes pleaded for me to listen.
I gripped Quindelle’s hair tighter and kept on to the parking lot. She whimpered, begging me to let her go.
“Mommy!” Chasity cried. “Daddy, stop it!”
“Chassy, baby, come here.” Chance grabbed her.
“True, ouch,” Quindelle sobbed loudly. “You’re hurting me.”
I was done telling Quin the same shit repeatedly. These bitches thought shit was sweet. They must’ve forgotten who the fuck I was. I was down to remind them, though. If I had to go hard on a bitch every day until they got some act right, then so be it.
We reached the parking lot, and I dragged her all the way to her car.
“True Jones!” Granny Ann’s panicked voice rung out. “Let that girl go, right now!”
“No, her ass don’t know when to shut up.”
“Hush, Love!” she snapped. “True!”
We made it to her driver’s side, and I snatched the fanny pack off her waist. Letting her go, I dug in it until I found her keys. Unlocking the door, I opened it and stuck the key in the ignition. I didn’t know who was crying louder: Chasity or Quindelle. Grabbing her up, I forced her into the driver’s seat and shut the door.
“Take yo’ ass home,” I stated calmly, then went to shut the party down.
9
Why are we reckless when we care so much?
Chance
I couldn’t believe True had handled Quindelle in that manner...and in front of Chasity. My godbaby cried herself to sleep in True’s arms as he consoled her. Granny was so ashamed and disappointed, she made me take her home, refusing to be around True any longer. It had happened a few days ago, but the images of Quindelle being drug, Chassy crying, and True acting like a raging bull were still heavy on my mind. Even though she made my life hard sometimes, no woman deserved to be yanked through a park by her hair.
Three taps on my office door took my mind off that mess of a birthday party momentarily.
“Come in.” I put my computer to sleep.
The door opened slowly, and Piper stuck her head in. “Hey, Chance, are you busy?”
“No.” I motioned for her to come in all the way. “Everything all right?” Her puffy eyes told me it wasn’t, but I didn’t want to overstep any boundaries.
Piper entered and shut the door behind her. “I wish I could say it was.”
I pushed away from my desk and stood up. “Have a seat.” I fixed my blouse. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
She hung her head and sniffled. “I just have a lot on my plate and no one to confide in. I know this is inappropriate.”
Taking a few Kleenex out of the box, I walked them over to her. “Here ya go.” I sat down on the corner of my desk.
“Thanks.” She dabbed her eyes.
“What’s the matter?”
“My ex-fiancé. He’s been making these last couple months so hard for me.”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” I empathized. “Do you need a little time off?”
Piper cleaned her nose. “No, I just needed a good cry. I really miss him, ya know? Our relationship wasn’t always bad. We shared a lot of great times.”
I smiled. “Most loving relationships are like that. The man I’m pregnant by used to be my best friend and biggest supporter in the entire world.” I stared down at my stomach. “Now, we only see each other at doctor appointments and birthday parties.”
Leaning forward onto her legs, Piper sighed. “Why does love have to be so hard?”
“Anything worth having is worth fighting for. You just can’t be the only one fighting.” I placed my hand on her shoulder.
“But how do you know when to stop fighting?” Piper whispered. “Like, how do you know when enough is just too much?”
I let her question sit for a minute because I’d asked myself that same thing numerous times. However, I still didn’t have the full answer. Everyone’s “enough” was different. We were all wired to deal with whatever our own minds, bodies, and souls could handle. No human being on planet Earth hurts the exact same, but we all experience the same emotions.
“I guess”—I crossed my arms—“when you start losing sight of who you are. When your days are filled with sadness and gloom and sleepless nights consume you.” I blinked, and tears lined the brim of my eyes. “When you just can’t seem to get through to that person, no matter how much you sacrifice.”
Piper looked up at me. “Wow.”
Standing up, I swiftly removed a Kleenex.
“You really loved him, huh?”
Love...
I dabbed my eyes, then balled up the tissue.
I really love him.
“Thank you for that, Chance. I really needed somebody to pour my heart out to,” she chuckled. “I’m a little embarrassed. You’re pregnant, running two businesses, and I’m whining about a relationship that I ended.”
I waved her off. “No problem. We’re family here at Chance’s Truth. I can’t thrive without you guys, so anytime you need a shoulder to cry on, or a listening ear, my door is always open,” I said sincerely, retaking the seat behind my desk.
Piper got up. “Well, I appreciate it.”
I nodded, watching her make her exit. Once the door shut, the tears poured down. I hated how fucked up things were with True and I. I hated all the regret I had, especially toward my unborn child. I wanted to be a mommy, but not like this. Not at the expense of losing my everything.
Slowly pulling myself together, I took a few deep breaths. Reaching for my cell phone, I went to my contacts and dialed Erin up. If there was anybody who knew how I felt, it was her. She’d been through this two times with the same man she was now married to. Tone and Erin had been to hell and back twenty times, yet they still shared an eternal love for one another.
Erin was also one of the most positive people I knew other than Granny Ann. People judged her off her tough exterior, but E was patie
nt and sweet. If she really cared about you, there was no limit to her loyalty. We’d only known each other for a few years, but I took pride in saying she was a close friend, almost like family, and I had True and his connection to Tone to thank for that.
“Hello,” Erin answered.
“Hey, E.” I wiped my cheek with the back of my free hand. “What you doing?”
“Girl, layin’ across Rome’s bed, looking stupid. I’m so ready to drop this fuckin’ baby,” she chuckled. “What’s up?”
Ezias was due any day now, and I couldn’t wait to see how cute he was going to be.
“Nothing, at work. Hormones getting the best of me,” I giggled.
She chuckled lightly. “You wanna talk about it?”
I shrugged as if she could see me. I didn’t want to mess up her good mood, especially since she was spending quality time with Tone’s little sister, Rome. “Not really, I just wanted to ask you a quick question.”
“Shoot.”
“When you’re in love, and it hurts, no matter what you do, how do you know when enough is enough? You know, to just let it be?” I sniffled. Warm tears trickled down my cheeks. I’d been doing so good without True, I didn’t understand why I was so sad all of a sudden.
Thanks, Piper.
I rolled my eyes.
“That’s simple. When you ain’t got no more fight in you,” Erin sighed. “If you truly feel like you have no more energy or time to give up, then give in.”
And just like that, a sudden rush of relief washed over me. That short, easy answer gave me my second wind.
“Thank you, E.”
“You’re welcome. Call me later?” I knew that was her way of waiting until she was alone to really dig deep into how I was feeling.
I smiled. “Later.”
Ending the call, I unlocked my computer to start payroll.
True
“Granny!” I walked through her house. It was quiet for it to be eight at night on a Friday. Her spot was usually full of badass kids, tearing shit up.
When I got halfway down the hallway, Love and our cousin, Delaney, were heading towards me. Love looked back at the kitchen.
