by Emma Renshaw
“We have to think of something,” she states firmly. “For both of them.”
I nod my head, but I know it’s futile.
We stay silent for long moments. “Now you know everything.”
“You’re still the best man I know, James. Even with everything from your past.”
“I should go to the gym and work today, but I want to stay here with you and just be with you all day,” I say honestly.
Tatum doesn’t answer. Instead, she curls into my side as I wrap an arm around her, breathing easier than I have my entire life.
Chapter 40
Tatum
I lay down on the weight bench I just disinfected, throwing my arm over my eyes and grumbling. “This isn’t fun.”
“I didn’t say it would be fun,” James chuckles. I’ve cleaned three benches in the time James has wiped down almost half of the equipment in the gym. After each one I’ve done, I’ve collapsed onto the bench in exhaustion. I really don’t like mornings.
“It’s too early,” I complain.
“Tate,” James muses. My nickname sends a flutter through my belly. Since he confessed everything, he’s let the nickname slip a few times. I love when he says it in gruff voice, but I love sunshine and my full name from him even more. He’s the only one to call me Tatum and that feels special. “I tried to let you sleep in on your day off, you wanted to see what it’s like to open the gym.”
“Why does Sirius get to sleep?” I mutter. We took Sirius with us to Raise the Bar. He’s curled up sleeping in James’s office. There’s a little over an hour until the gym opens. It’s just the two of us and Sirius.
“He doesn’t have opposable thumbs. He can’t get the gym ready,” James says much closer than he was. I take my arm off my face and open my eyes. He’s standing above me smiling with his hands on his hips. “Do I need to entice you to work?”
My breath hitches wondering if he’ll entice me in a fun way. James’s pupils dilate as he stares at me and a low rumble begins in his chest before he bends in half claiming my mouth. He moves to the front of the weight bench, dropping to his knees without breaking our connection.
I slide forward to the edge of the bench, spreading my legs, allowing his body to come in between them. His hands land on my knees and coast up my thighs to my waist and stop just below my breasts. I moan into his mouth when his thumbs rub over my extended nipples.
James breaks our kiss, breathing raggedly. “Take off your clothes.”
I whip my shirt and sports bra over my head. James ducks his head, pulling a nipple into his mouth, sucking hard. I cry out as I weave my fingers into his short hair. He takes his mouth away and tugs on my shorts and panties. I lift my butt from the bench, helping him get rid of the material. I toe off my sandals, kicking them away.
“Wider,” James growls. I’m sitting in front of him completely naked while he’s still clothed. I spread my legs wider, but reach forward and yank on his shirt. When his shirt is next to my clothes on the ground, he leans forward touching our torsos together. James sighs when our skin connects and he wraps me tightly in his arms as his head sinks into my neck. He breathes deeply and kisses my pulse point.
I wrap my legs around his body and tuck my face into his neck, holding him to me. When James leans back, I lift my head, and move to kiss him. His tongue invades my mouth sending me on the path of destruction with only his kiss.
I whimper as his mouth starts to move down my body, driving me crazy while he avoids every part I want him to touch. He hovers over my wet core, looking up at me with bright silver eyes. “Watch in the mirror, Tatum.”
My eyes leave his, looking behind him at the wall of mirrors. My gasp turns into a moan when he sucks my clit hard. His big, rough hands glide up my body until they reach my breasts. He tugs on my nipples as he plunges his tongue inside of me.
James’s back muscles ripple with each of his movements. My chest is heaving and I can see that the blue of my eyes is flaming brighter.
“James,” I chant his name, rolling my hips to meet his mouth. His scruff scrapes against the inside of my thighs as he devours me, groaning as I start to convulse around him.
“Please. I…I…Jam—Yes. James,” I cry out as I explode into a million pieces. James stands pushing down his basketball shorts and ripping off his shoes. I’m trembling on the bench, the aftershocks still rolling through me. James’s eyes are on mine.
“Fuck,” he grinds out. “So fucking beautiful.”
He lifts me and sits on the edge of the bench and bringing me onto his lap. I collapse on him, leaning my back against his chest. James spreads my legs, making them fall over his muscular thighs. His thick, hard cock is between my legs. I reach down, wrapping my hand around him. A deep groan leaves his lips as he kisses along my neck.
My fist tightens around him, sliding up and down his shaft. Wetness floods my core again as I watch us in the mirror. His face is tucked into my neck kissing me.
“James,” I call. “Baby.”
He meets my eyes in the mirror.
“Yes,” I hiss, jerking him faster. He tugs my hand away, and uses my hip to lift me slightly. “No condom,” I breathe.
He nods his head in agreement then urges me down on him. I sink onto him slowly, letting him fill me inch by inch while our eyes stay connected in the mirror. One of his hands skates over my stomach, up past my breasts, and rests at my throat, turning my face toward his.
“Kiss me,” he demands
My lips land on his, sucking his bottom lip into my mouth and grazing my teeth across it. James pulls back looking into my eyes. His hips are rolling slowly as he makes love to me. My breathing is erratic as I watch James’s gray eyes moves all over my face lovingly. The grip he has on my neck gets tighter.
“You’re mine.” His breath skates over my skin as he speaks.
“You’ve owned me since our first kiss,” I admit.
“I’ll fall to my knees and sacrifice everything for one minute with you. I can’t give you up. You belong to me. I’ve never belonged to anyone before, but I’m yours, just as much as you’re mine.”
Unshed tears fill my eyes. “I’m keeping you, James Harris. I don’t care what I have to do or who I have to fight. The mafia. You. It doesn’t matter. I’m keeping you.”
“Christ,” he mutters, bringing my lips to his in a deep, wet, passionate kiss. I sink everything I am and everything I feel into that kiss. He starts bucking into me faster, taking his mouth from me, and leans his forehead against mine. “Turn your eyes to the mirror, sunshine. Watch me fuck you. Let me see you come all over my cock. You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen, see what I see.”
I turn my head toward the mirror and watch him power into me until we’re spent and calling out each other’s name. In that moment, I know what he sees when he looks at me. A woman insanely in love and he’s right, it’s fucking beautiful.
Chapter 41
James
I lift the bar over my head, holding for a couple seconds before lowering, and repeating the process. I can feel each movement in my muscles and it still feels so good. I’ve been out of physical therapy for weeks, but still haven’t adjusted to the fact that I can do this.
“I don’t think I can take you seriously with that dog,” Corbin says. He’s standing behind the bench, spotting me as I lift the weights. He’s almost done with his physical therapy and should be able to play by the championship game next month.
I glance down at Sirius, chuckling. He’s on my stomach. Each time I raise the bar over my head, he stands, and when I lower it to my chest, he lays down. He’s doing his own form of a workout. His tongue is poking out of his mouth and he wags his tail when he notices me watching him.
I’ve never had a pet, wasn’t sure I ever wanted one, but I really enjoy Sirius running and sliding across my wood floors when I get home. He’s entertaining and cute. Over the past couple months, he’s become my constant companion.
“He’s badass,” I say.
Corbin hoots before doubling over and cracking up. I meet Sirius’s eyes, he wags his tail and cocks his head to the side. I smile, lifting the bar again and feel Sirius stand on my stomach and lower as I bring down the bar.
“How many dogs do you know that can do that?” I ask.
“But, he’s so small. He’s a girly dog, like in movies when girl’s carry their dogs in purses.”
“Sirius is not going in a purse,” I assert. “He may be small, but he’s a badass.”
“Whatever you say,” Corbin laughs.
I place the bar on the rack, use my hand to hold Sirius, and sit up. I move Sirius to my shoulder, his favorite place to perch. Corbin hands me a towel to wipe off the sweat. He has the disinfectant and paper towels in his hand.
It’s something small, but it’s respect for the equipment, the gym, and me. “Thanks, man,” I say. As I stand, he begins to wipe the bench and bar.
Corbin nods, pausing mid-stroke, and clears his throat. “James?”
His hands are still frozen on the bench, but the one holding the towel is grasping it tightly, letting the paper crumble under his fist. When his eyes don’t meet mine, I crouch down, setting Sirius at my feet and tell him to stay.
“What’s up?” I keep my tone light. His face is still hidden from view, but there’s tension radiating off of him.
“If…if I play in the championship game, will you come?” I pat his hand a couple of times before pulling it away.
“Even if you can’t play and you’re on the bench, I’ll be there,” I promise.
His head whips up and searches my face for a lie he won’t find. Corbin swallows and nods his head once, looking back down. “That’d be cool,” he says.
“What would be cool?” Tatum asks rubbing her eyes. I stand from my crouched position as she gets closer. She’s been sleeping on the couch in my office since I opened the gym. She stumbles into me, burrowing her head in my chest, and wrapping her arms around my waist.
“James said he’s going to the championship game,” Corbin responds. His tone is nonchalant, but he rolls forward on the balls of his feet and his lips are twitching.
“We’re both going,” Tatum says.
“Really?” Corbin asks in wonder, rocking back.
“Yeah, definitely. I’m going to make a sign and everything.”
Corbin shakes his head. “Don’t do that, it’ll be embarrassing.”
Tatum shrugs and I feel her cheeks move against my chest, so I know she’s smiling. “What are you doing for Thanksgiving next week, Corbin?”
His hand releases the bottle of cleaning fluid and scratches the backside of his neck. “No plans. My fosters are going to visit family, so it’ll just be me.”
Tatum tenses in my arms. “You’re coming with us to my parent’s house.”
Corbin opens his mouth to argue and I grin when Tatum slices her hand through the air, cutting him off. “No arguments. It’s settled.”
She picks up Sirius and walks back to my office. I turn to Corbin. His eyes are huge as he stares after her. “It’s best not to argue,” I say honestly. “She’ll get her way in the end.”
Chapter 42
James
“J-man,” Corbin calls from the backseat.
“Don’t call me that,” I mutter.
Last week when Tatum and I found out that Corbin was spending Thanksgiving alone, Tatum stepped in, insisting he come to her parents’ house with us. His foster family is spending the holiday with their family. They don’t bring any of the foster kids. The other children in the house are spending the day with some friends, but Corbin planned to be alone.
I could tell when we picked Corbin up that he was nervous. Those nerves only grew when we pulled up to her parents’ house, but the moment he heard her grandfather cursing up a storm, he relaxed. That’s what did it for me when I met them, too. That crazy old man. The rest of the day was spent laughing and having a good time.
“Since I beat you in pool, I think I should get a reward.”
Tatum laughs next to me, bringing her hand down on my arm and squeezing.
“Reward?” I ask.
“Yeah, like a prize.”
“There’s no prize for winning a game of pool. I let you win.”
I didn’t. That kid swindled me. When I glance in the rearview mirror, Corbin’s head is thrown back, clutching his stomach, as he laughs. “Whatever you need to tell yourself, J-man.”
“Don’t call me that.”
“Okay, J-man.”
I glance at Tate, smirking. She’s beaming. Her hand slides down my arm, linking our fingers together and resting our hands on my thigh. I release her hand when my phone starts ringing from the cup holder.
Unknown. My thumb hesitates for a split second over the screen, my gut clenching. It’s been a good day. I brace myself for something to come crashing down and ruining the day. That’s the way it works.
I answer the call. “Yeah?”
“Connor. Long time, no talk, brother.”
My veins fill with ice. An anvil drops in my stomach, stealing the air from my lungs. The dark road in front of me turns blurry as I process whose voice I’m hearing. Callan.
Fuck.
No.
This can’t fucking be possible. He’s still speaking, but I can’t hear a fucking word he’s saying. A small hand squeezes my clenched thigh.
Tatum.
Fuck. My focus returns, and I glance at her. Her eyebrows are drawn in with her head tilted. The stunning blue of her eyes grounds me.
Tatum.
I have to get her home. And, Corbin. I need to get him home, too. Fuck.
My eyes swing back to the dark road, and I pay attention to every word Callan is saying.
“Happy Thanksgiving, brother. You remember the last Thanksgiving before you died? We rented that shitty-ass motel room because it had that little kitchenette. Our oven was fucked, and I wanted to give Braelyn a nice holiday feast. The kind of shit neither of us had. We bought that turkey,” he laughs.
We didn’t buy the turkey. We stole the turkey. Who knew a fucking turkey could be so damn expensive? Braelyn was barely old enough to remember anything, but we did want to give her something. If this was a different life, I’d be laughing with him. If I didn’t have so much on the line, I’d be laughing with him. But, I’m not. Not even fucking close.
I’ve pretty much stalked Callan online from the moment I left. He and his baby sister are the only things I miss from that old life. I can’t laugh about that fucking turkey because of the person sitting next to me. This can’t touch Tatum.
“We thought it would be so easy to cook. All those recipes you found at the library made it sound so damn easy. Our potatoes were bricks, the turkey was black. We ordered Chinese food. I fucking missed you, man.”
He laughs again, but it’s not a happy laugh. It’s dark and angry. “I got some shit to say. First, fuck you, Connor. James. Whatever the fuck your name is.”
I swing my SUV around a turn, pointing it toward Tatum’s. “James?” she asks softly. I can’t bring her back to my place. I need to get her home right now.
“Fifteen minutes,” I manage to say. My voice is so low, I wonder if he even heard me before I hang up.
“Who was that?” Tatum asks.
“Wrong number,” I reply, not looking at her. Anger and panic flood my system, neither knowing which should take precedent. My mind is racing with possibilities and plans. I can’t think with Tatum’s jasmine scent next to me. Her safety is the only goal.
Tatum opens her mouth to reply, but I shake my head once, clutching the wheel with both hands. Corbin is completely silent in the backseat. My eyes meet his in the rearview mirror. He swallows thickly, noticing the rising tension.
“Stay in the car,” I say to Corbin when I pull up in front of her place.
“Bye, Tate,” he mumbles. “Thank you for today.”
“Anytime you want to go over and shoot pool with Pop Pop, I know he’d l
ove to have you,” Tatum says with a forced smile, turned in her seat so she’s facing him. Her hand reaches through the seats to pat his leg. She winks at him. “See you later.”
I step out of the car without meeting her eyes, and when she gets out of the car and stands next to me on the sidewalk, I grab her hand and go to the front door at a clipped pace.
“James, what’s going on?”
“Headache,” I lie.
She opens her mouth, but I crash my lips to hers, cutting off her words. Tatum lets me take complete control, resisting fighting me, like I know she’s itching to do. I banked on her not doing it while Corbin is waiting in the car.
I hold her to me as tightly as I possibly can, running my hands up and down her sides, relishing the feel of her beneath my palms. “Tatum,” I whisper, savoring every syllable of her name. “Tatum.”
My lips land on her neck, sucking hard and marking a piece of her. I want so much more. If my life was different, if I had a different past, if I wouldn’t be looking over my shoulder until my dying breath, I’d give this girl everything. Every worldly possession. Every piece of me. Heart. Body. Soul. Every damn fucking thing. I’d sign over my fucking life to her if it meant I could keep her for just five more minutes.
The only thing she’d have to give me is herself. That’s all I want. It’s all I need.
I can’t keep her, though. Not even for five more minutes.
Not even for thirty more seconds.
The fifteen minutes I demanded sits like a guillotine above my head, sliding closer to end me with each passing second.
“Bye, sunshine.”
Chapter 43
James
Corbin is in the front when I slide behind the wheel. I step on the gas, racing down the street toward his house. He’s staring at his hands. They’re fisted in his lap, and breaths are coming out heavy. Kid is too observant for his age. I know what’s coming before he even opens his mouth.
