Serenading Heartbreak

by Ella Fields

  “That test says differently.”

  The words raced out, scraping over my tongue before I could think better of it. “If I am pregnant, we both know it’s not yours.”

  Aiden stopped, and so did I. Passersby moved around us as color leeched from his face.

  That freaking face that hadn’t changed, save for the thick coat of stubble that now seemed to be a permanent feature.

  His eyes, dark and impenetrable, closed, then reopened and focused on the ground.

  “I’m sorry.” It was a rasp. “But you’ve been gone for months, Aiden.”

  “Five months, which, apparently, is long enough.” His chest heaved with a loaded exhale. “Everett?”

  I didn’t want to say it. Didn’t like how even thinking the word felt like a betrayal. To both men. Even though I’d done nothing wrong other than fall for them both.

  So I said nothing and left, holding my purse close to my chest until I was locked behind the comfort of our bright blue front door.

  I slid down it, my purse falling to the floor, the tests inside spilling out as my hand sank into my hair, tugging.

  Real. It was all too damn real.

  I’d gone on the pill. I’d made the doctor’s appointment after the first time Everett and I had sex in his tiny room.

  Time sped by as I stared at the boxes, counting and measuring all the ways life would change if those tests were positive. Then it slowed when I thought about them being negative.

  Either way, choices would need to be made.

  What was Aiden doing here? The season wasn’t over yet.

  Squeezing my eyes shut at the thought of telling Everett that Aiden had returned, that I’d taken these tests, and that I could be pregnant caused an ache to bloom behind my skull.

  I forced myself off the ground, forced myself to pick the tests up, and forced myself into the bathroom where I carefully read the instructions.

  Ten minutes later, I was trying to swallow a knot the size of my fist as I stared at all three tests. All three—very much positive—tests.

  I was fucking pregnant.

  After letting the shock, fear, and a small kernel of excitement drip from my eyes, I spent the next hour with them as I tried to go over all the things I’d need to do next.

  Number one was tell Everett, but he wouldn’t be home for hours, and I wasn’t about to text him news like this.

  Number two was call the doctor.

  Number three was call my mom and have her come and hold me until this mess got figured out.

  Unfortunately, I could only do one of those, so I called my doctor and scored an appointment for the next afternoon after work.

  I ran myself a bath, ignored Gloria’s call, and sent her a text saying I was fine, then I curled up in my robe on my bed and stared at the wall.

  Everett. The band. Aiden. My degree.

  What the hell were we going to do?

  Gentle hands brushed hair from my face, and I blinked open weighted lids to find Everett seated on the side of my bed.

  His eyes were rimmed in red, exhaustion pulling at his plump lips. Golden light danced across the dusty blond hair curling around his face, bathing him and the room in peach as the sun approached the horizon.

  “You finished early?” I found that hard to believe.

  “You didn’t answer my calls or texts.”

  Oh. I reached for my phone, but it wasn’t there. It was in his hand.

  “I got worried.” The subtle note of wariness to his voice had hair rising on my arms.

  I pushed them beneath me and rose to sit.

  My hands shook, combing through my hair while I contemplated how best to tell him the news. “I, um, I need to tell you something.”

  He didn’t move or speak for an extended minute, but then he handed over my phone and stood from the bed. “Does it have anything to do with Aiden texting you?”

  “What?” I lit up my phone and saw what he was talking about. I had two texts from Everett, asking how I was, if I was okay, and then three missed calls.

  Above those was a text from Aiden.

  Prince: Pregnant or not, I still need to talk to you.

  He hadn’t gotten a new number then. He’d just blocked mine.

  “Pregnant?” Everett roused my foggy brain. “Is that true?” With his eyes skating over my flat stomach, he began pacing my room, his undone laces slapping against heavy boots. “And how the fuck would he know?”

  “I ran into him when I was leaving the drugstore today, and one of the tests fell out of my purse.” I snorted. “Awesome timing.”

  Everett didn’t laugh, not that I’d expected him to.

  I sighed. “According to three tests, I am. I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow afternoon to confirm.”

  His pacing ceased. “You went on the pill.”

  “After we’d had sex. We didn’t exactly follow the rules.” I puffed out a half-laugh. “Ever.”

  That earned me a glimmer of a smile.

  “Come here,” I whispered. “Don’t leave me alone in this.”

  “Fuck,” he groaned, his hand in his hair as he returned to me. He dropped his hand, then dropped to his knees beside the bed. “I’m being a dick, only thinking about how I feel about this. I’m sorry.”

  While I wasn’t exactly over the moon, the idea of having his child had beads of warmth planting in my stomach. “You don’t want to go through with it.”

  His eyes widened, and he pressed his lips to mine, kissing me several times. “No, it’s not that. I’m shocked, Clover. You and a baby, I would never have dared to hope for something like this. I just…”

  “Just?”

  He released me, and I watched the green of his eyes fade as worry crept close to the surface. “I just hope I can be enough for you.”

  “Are you going to be here?”

  “Yes,” he said instantly.

  “Then that’s enough.”

  He frowned. “What about school?”

  “I can finish online or after the baby is born.” I smoothed my hand over his cheek. “Let’s wait until I’ve been to the doctor before we get too carried away.”

  He nodded, turning to lay a kiss on my palm, then he lowered his head to my stomach, his lashes lowering as I ran my nails through his hair.

  “You’re tired.”

  He ignored my comment. “Aiden. Are you going to see him?”

  He’d see right through my lies unless they held some truth. “I would love to hear what he has to say for himself, but I don’t need to.”

  “Why?” Gazing up, he narrowed his eyes. “Why do you want to hear it?”

  I swallowed, mulling over an answer that might make him understand, even if only a little. “He hurt me, Everett.”

  “I was there, right here.” Anger laced his voice. “I know.”

  I nodded.

  “Don’t see him.” The words were a rushed plea. “I don’t want him anywhere near you.”

  “Ever,” I tried.

  “No. I know that makes me a controlling dick, but so be it.” His eyes and his tone were hard. “No, Clover.”

  “You have nothing to worry about.” The lie tasted foul on my tongue. I would never hurt Everett like that, but emotionally, when it came to Aiden, I still was. I still hadn’t let go. And after seeing him that morning, I was worried I might never be able to.

  “I do. You’re not seeing him. What time is this appointment tomorrow?”

  I blinked. “Three forty-five. But you have to be at the studio.”

  “I’ll meet you there.” He stood, pulling me off the bed, his arms banding around me as he sang low to my lips. “Now let’s get you fed before I feed you my cock.”

  “So bossy and crass.”

  He squeezed my ass.

  I laughed when he turned, causing my back to meet the closed door, and framed my face with his hands before devouring my mouth.

  True to his word, Everett met me at the doctor’s office where they ran tests and called me
back two days later for the results.

  He made sure he was there for that too as the doctor gave us a rough due date of the tenth of February, then handed over a mountain of pamphlets. Which meant the lighter period I’d had in May wasn’t just a light period. I’d been spotting, as I was apparently ten weeks along already.

  I had a moment when I did the math in my head, counting back to when Aiden and I had last been together at my parents’ house over Christmas. Then I laughed like a crazed woman, realizing how stupid the thought was. It was impossible. I was relieved, if only for the fact that every time I thought of Aiden, I still remembered the way he’d left me crumpled and discarded on the sidewalk at the start of the year.

  After my unnecessary freak-out, I felt like the biggest idiot. Adela had a good laugh over it too. To say she was shocked when I’d told her I was pregnant would be an overstatement. She’d jumped off the couch, screaming with her arms in the air, hollering that Dale owed her a hundred dollars.

  Now if I could just tell Gloria and Sabrina and maybe my mom without throwing up, that’d be fantastic.

  As it was, I wasn’t feeling nauseous, but my boobs ached, which I’d attributed to hormones when Everett had squeezed them too hard.

  Turns out, I didn’t need to say a word.

  “You’re pregnant,” Gloria greeted, hands on her hips when I walked into work that Friday.

  “Uh, hey?” I blinked; the door slammed behind me, wind chimes dancing.

  “When were you going to tell us?” Gloria’s eyes were doing that weird rounding thing they did when she was getting pissed.

  “When you didn’t look like you might kill me?” I offered a weak smile.

  Sabrina finished with an arrangement, then set it down and opened her arms. “Oh, she’s just messing with you. Come here.”

  I went to her, my emotions climbing as her scent and arms enveloped me.

  Gloria clucked her tongue, then groaned. “Fine, but I wanted Aiden.”

  I could feel Sabrina give her the eyeball over my shoulder, and then Gloria was hugging me too.

  I started blubbering like a baby, and they began to coo and pet my hair as I mumbled out incoherent things. “Didn’t know. And I don’t know if I’m ready. And Aiden’s b-back. I’m not even twenty-one yet. And I don’t want to see him. And oh, my God, I’m having a fucking baby.”

  The wind chimes sang as a customer walked in. “Um, I just came by to grab some—”

  “Later, Allen,” Sabrina said. “Shoo.” The chimes sang again as he retreated. “Have you told your mom yet?”

  “No.” I stepped out of their embrace, thanking Gloria when she handed me a tissue. “I don’t know how. Everett and me…” I blew my nose, then dabbed at the mascara trails beneath my eyes. “We’ve only just gotten to a place where we feel like we’re finally able to do this.”

  “Having a baby won’t make anyone mad at you, darling.” Gloria rubbed my back.

  “Your mom might even be excited,” Sabrina offered. “When she gets over the shock of becoming a grandma of course.”

  “Not helping.” Gloria glared.

  “Why don’t you head home for the day?” Sabrina tucked some hair behind my ear. “Put your feet up, or hey, maybe—”

  The door opened again, and I looked over to see Everett walk in wearing a megawatt grin, the kind rarely seen on him.

  It fell when he caught sight of me, and then he was rushing over, collecting me to him. “What happened?” His tone was sharp but not accusing.

  Ensnared in the crisp clean scent of his black T-shirt with his arms around me, I struggled to remember why I’d been so worried. “I was just having a moment. I’m okay.”

  Framing my face, his hands tipped it back to search my eyes. “A moment?”

  I nodded, sniffing and smiling. “I guess my hormones are going to be crazier than normal.”

  His thumbs brushed beneath my eyes, removing the wet smudges, and his lips pressed into a tight line. “You should’ve called me.”

  “It only just happened.”

  He peeked over my shoulder at Gloria and Sabrina, then returned his attention to me. With his hands brushing up and down my arms, he drew in a ragged breath. “I fucking hate seeing you cry.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  His brows furrowed, lips twitching. “Don’t apologize.”

  “What are you doing here?” The way he kept bailing when he needed to be recording this album wasn’t right. They’d barely gotten started, and I wasn’t sure how Jack and the rest of the band kept allowing it.

  Then again, it was Everett. He did what he wanted when he wanted to.

  “I have something for you.”

  I tilted my head, my gaze questioning, then I looked at Gloria and Sabrina, who were wearing secretive smiles. They knew about whatever this was.

  Everett clasped my hand, and his smile returned, curving his lips and warming my chest. “Come on.”

  Outside, I stopped on the sidewalk when he pulled a set of keys from his pocket and hit the key fob, unlocking a Volkswagen SUV. “Um…”

  “It’s yours,” he said, opening the door.

  “What?” I dragged my eyes from the excitement dancing over his face and carefully stepped closer to the red car. “It’s mine?”

  “Did you really think you’d be able to get around town with just a stroller?” He laughed. “We need a car, Clover.”

  Perched on the back seat was a baby seat, still in the box. My hand rose to my mouth, my eyes watering yet again. “Holy shit, Everett.”

  He rubbed my back. “Red. It was that or yellow, which they didn’t have. I couldn’t picture you in anything dull.”

  “How did you…?” I stopped, glaring at him. “You used your advance? God, Everett, that’s to help you live until this album starts making some money.” He couldn’t work at the hardware store with the kind of hours they had to put in at the studio.

  “It’s fine.” Sincere and firm, he said, “Trust me.”

  Those two words had my shoulders relaxing. Marginally. “You could have bought something cheaper. This would’ve been expens—”

  “Clover.” He groaned. “Would you quit riding my ass and get in the damn car?”

  I planted my hands on my hips, ready to ream him out, then stopped when his mouth caught mine. His hands sank into my hair, and he kissed me until I could hardly breathe, let alone remember what I’d been worried about.

  “Where are we going?” I asked after he’d tucked me inside.

  “Studio. If I’m gone too long, they’ll have a tantrum.” He turned the car around and headed through town toward the highway. “Besides, I like it when you’re there.”

  “Just…” My eyes were zigzagging everywhere. The gear shift, the stereo, the leather seats. “Wow.”

  “You over your shock enough to admit you like it?”

  With my fingers gliding over the center console, where two bottles of cold water were perspiring, a small laugh tumbled out. “I fucking love it.”

  Everett slipped on his sunglasses. “I love you. Now drink some water. You’ve been crying too much.”

  I did as I was told, and for the first time since we’d found out about this pregnancy, I felt like everything really would be okay.

  “I guess things are getting serious,” Graham drawled around the butt of his cigarette, wearing a shit-eating grin as he watched us cross the lot to the refurbed warehouse.

  “Mind your business, G.” Everett lit up his own smoke, then waved at the door. “Head inside, I’ll be there in a few.”

  Waves of heat curled over the ground, raising goose bumps on my skin. I pushed the door open, relieved the A/C was up high.

  “Well, look who it is.” Hendrix gave a slight smile from where he sat on a blood red leather couch, tuning his guitar. “How you doing, Steve?”

  “Good.” I turned in the open plan space. “Where is everyone?”

  A thud from the window across the warehouse made me jump, and there was New
Guy and Dale behind the window of the control room, waving.

  “How’s it coming?”

  “Slow,” Hendrix grumbled.

  “Why? Something happen?” I moved to the couch, taking a seat near him.

  “These things take time. A lot more work than any of us would’ve guessed, but aside from that.” He eyed me a moment, then shook his head. “Your boyfriend keeps happening.”

  About to ask what he meant, I paused when a guy I didn’t know came in through a side door with a headset wrapped around his neck. “Ready yet?”

  “Yeah, he’s back.” Hendrix stood, looping his guitar strap around his neck.

  The guy nodded, heading into the control room with barely a glance my way.

  “Did he seriously buy you a car?”

  My hands became interesting, and I ran my fingers over each other. “He did.”

  Hendrix laughed, a low, gruff sound. “Well, at least he’s doing one thing right.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means exactly what I said, Steve.” He sighed. “Look, I’m over it. I really am. You two being together. But he’s the master of half-assing shit, and you know it.”

  “He’s been working hard,” I tried to defend.

  “Right. When he’s here, and when he’s here, he’s only half here.”

  “I’m pregnant,” I blurted.

  “Excuse me?” Hendrix backed up a step, his eyes layered with exhaustion, bulging. “For real?”

  I nodded. “We found out about a week ago, so it’s my fault he’s probably been distracted.”

  Hendrix scrubbed at his mouth. “Huh.”

  I wasn’t expecting him to be happy about it, but it felt good to tell him the truth instead of hiding it for a change. “I’m not quite three months along yet, so…”

  Hendrix nodded. “Yeah.” He nodded again. “Yeah, I won’t say shit. Mom and Dad know?”

  I brushed my hands over my blue polka-dotted skirt. “Not yet. We’ve been trying to wrap our heads around it first.”

  “What about school?” he asked. “You’re what, only halfway done?”

  “Hendrix, don’t.”