She touched a hand to her heart to calm the frantically beating organ.
“What are you doing here?” Had he shouted that demand, it could not have contained more fury and power than that steely whisper.
Eve wetted her lips. I should leave. I should race off and pretend this meeting never occurred and pray he doesn’t sack me from my post for defying his orders. “You do leave your rooms,” she said, unable to keep the faint accusation from that statement.
Lucas flared his eyes, but said nothing.
Did his family know their son and brother escaped deep within the manor when the house slumbered? Did they know and were content to allow him his secrets? Or did they sleep and live, failing to see the true depths of how Lucas had been changed by life? Uninvited, Eve entered the parlor and pushed the door closed behind her. The hinges squeaked noisily and that sound jolted him into movement.
He surged out from behind the bench and the legs scraped along the hardwood floor. “You were instructed not to wander the halls past midnight.” Had his voice been sharp and furious, mayhap she would have yanked the door open and darted back to her rooms. A servant stealing about her employer’s home in nothing more than a wrapper and nightshift would be turned out of any respectable household.
Yet, there was a faint entreaty to his retort that urged her closer. “It is because you wander the halls during these hours,” she said softly, at last piecing together the reason for the peculiar orders she’d been issued. There were no ghosts here. Not of the otherworldly sorts. Rather, there was the ghost of a man who lived within this world, alone, determined to keep all out.
Lucas warily eyed her approach. He dipped his eyes. His hot gaze briefly lingered on her breasts and a wave of heat went through her. Never had she felt beautiful. Tall, plain, and brown-haired when blonde ringlets were in favor, she fit not at all with Society’s vision of beauty. Yet, with Lucas, with a single look, he showed her a feminine power she’d never believed herself capable of, and it was heady stuff, indeed.
Eve stopped on the opposite end of the bench. “You play beautifully,” she said when she trusted herself to speak. She promptly warmed at that pathetic compliment that did little to capture the depth of his mastery of that instrument.
“I was a French prisoner,” he said quietly.
She stilled. He’d been imprisoned by Boney’s forces. Oh, God, what had they done to him? Eve bit down hard on the inside of her lower lip, as pain filled her...and awe for him, this man who’d survived, despite the cruelties visited upon him. What hell must he have endured?
“I was kept in a small room that had nothing more than a bed,” he continued, as though he’d followed the path her unspoken questioning had wandered as he’d always done through her time here. “There was a table, chair, and a pianoforte.”
To give her restless fingers something to do, she trailed a hand along the top of the magnificent piece.
“There were times I hungered for that goddamned instrument more than I did food and water,” he murmured that last part, his gaze trained beyond her head.
Eve’s heart wrenched. “You are free now,” she said on an aching whisper, willing him to see that those chains had been broken. She gestured to the room. “This is your home. The only person imprisoning you now is you, Lucas.”
A bitter laugh escaped him as he came around her. “Are we ever truly free?” No, he was correct on that score. Her breath hitched, as he layered his front against her back, bringing their bodies flush. “What of you?” his deep voice rumbled in the quiet.
Her lashes fluttered as she leaned into him. The intoxicating sandalwood scent that clung to him flooded her senses. There was a strength and power to this man that wrought havoc on her; filling her with the desire to know all there was about him. “What of me?” she made herself ask. Gentlemen didn’t put intimate questions to servants. To those men, they were largely invisible. Or that is how it had been with the previous peers she’d served under—until Lucas.
He angled her around, forcing her gaze to his. “You are no servant,” he said with a sobering bluntness.
Eve opened her mouth to counter that accurate supposition, but the sharp challenge in his green eyes quelled those words. She wet her lips and his gaze fell to her mouth. He’d predicted as much the day she’d stepped inside his chambers. “It does not matter who I am,” she said flippantly. Of course it mattered. She was a hated Ormond. The family who’d betrayed him and his kin and there could be no forgiving those past transgressions. A viselike pressure squeezed about her lungs. For when he ultimately discovered that truth, he’d cut her from his life as easily as a bothersome, dangling thread. It doesn’t matter. He is nothing to me. She briefly closed her eyes. Liar. “I am a serv—”
“Do not.” He pressed his fingertips to her lips, silencing her. “You are more than that, to me.”
To me. Oh, God. A dangerous yearning sprang to life in her heart; for all that could never be with this man. “You've known me but a handful of weeks,” she said around a powerful swell of emotion clogging her throat.
“Yes,” he concurred. “And yet, after those short weeks you know more about the man I now am than even my own family, who I’ve known the whole of my life.”
A bond was shared between them that only those who’d witnessed the hell upon those battlefields could understand. A connection that bound them.
He slowly lowered his head, giving her time to draw back. Her lips ached to know his kiss once more. He needn’t know the truth. I can remain here or go elsewhere with him never the wiser... Eve curled her hands, that hungering a palpable force within. For ultimately, she could not lie to him. “I am no widow,” she whispered and their breaths melded as one.
Lucas froze. Her family had wrought enough pain upon him and his kin. He cocked his head at such an endearing, boyish angle that her heart ached. This is who he would have been prior to his captivity. Prior to Talavera.
Unable to meet his piercing gaze, she slipped away from him and retreated over to the fireplace mantel. The gladius gleamed bright, mocking her with its very presence.
“What?” His question rumbled in the quiet of the room.
Never had she hated her father more than she did in this moment. For if life had moved differently and he’d been an honorable captain upon the fields of Europe, she would be more than a servant. She would be a woman worthy of a man like Lucas Rayne. A man who didn’t see rank or gender as marks upon her character, but rather a person. There is still my surname, which would have always divided us. “My father was a...” She curled her toes into the soles of her boots. “Commanding officer in Spain. At Talavera.” That admission emerged faint to her own ears. Mayhap he’d not heard. Mayhap he’d not known
“At Talavera?” he repeated slowly, his voice the same hollow it had been a fortnight earlier.
Pain ravaged her insides and she forced her gaze to his once more. “He turned over the battlefield plans to the French.” Her heart ached. “He was hanged as a traitor.”
That admission hung heavy, sucking the life from the room.
Invariably, it was there in Lucas’ eyes. As it always was when her connection to that famed traitor was discovered. Only this time it gutted her in ways it never had before. Shock. Denial. Disgust.
It was both deserved and too much, because of it.
“Your father was a traitor,” he said bluntly. Her stomach lurched at having him repeat the truth aloud.
“I will leave,” she said quietly, making for the door.
***
When Lucas’ brother-in-law, the powerful Duke of Devlin, had seen him traded over to the hands of English forces, Lucas existed in a haze. Details had swirled about his capture: the gunshot that had pierced his side and knocked him from his horse at Talavera. The Frenchmen who’d dragged him from the fields and who’d ultimately sold him for a small fortune. But from there, he’d retreated. And so, he’d never known there had been a traitor who’d sold the plans at Talavera. Nor had
his family shared as much with him.
Then, he’d carefully snipped them out of the fabric that was his existence.
Now, he stood before Eve, daughter of a traitor. A man whose crimes had seen many British killed on that bloody field in Spain, and others, such as Lucas, dragged away as a prisoner of the French. With her revelation, she’d offered him everything he’d asked of her since she’d arrived—her resignation.
No longer. Now, the possibility of her leaving filled him with a greater terror than his days at the hands of the French. She was the only person who had treated him again as a man. She’d boldly challenged him at every turn. A woman who’d seen more than the caged monster he’d become, to the man he’d once been. And she expected he should hate her for her birthright. Mayhap a fortnight earlier, before knowing her, he would have. For he’d subsisted more than two years on hatred alone. He’d allowed it to consume him, feed him, and shape him into an emotionless bastard, who kept even his family out. That isolation was easier than the pity.
Until Eve had stepped into his life and thrown his well-ordered world upside down.
How many people had so judged her for crimes that belonged to another? Disappointment filled him at that low-opinion she had of him. The uncertainty in her eyes gutted him. “Do you think I’m a man who’d hold you responsible for the crimes of your father?” he quietly asked, unable to keep the hurt from creeping into those handful of words.
Her lips parted and she fisted the fabric of her wrapper, her knuckles white under the force of her grip. “Everyone before you has judged me.” How matter of fact she was. Lucas silently damned every bastard before who’d quashed her sense of self-worth. “Why should you not?” she countered, her voice threadbare.
At that hint of frailty from this undaunted woman, his stomach muscles knotted. “Did you turn the English plans over to the enemy?” he asked, already knowing the answer.
Eve flared her eyes and shook her head frantically. “No,” the denial emerged, as though ripped from her lungs.
A woman of her resiliency and courage could never act in cowardice or with self-serving motives. “No,” he repeated. “You were the woman taking care of fallen soldiers in the fields after battle. The woman haunted by those same sights and sounds of war.”
A tortured sound spilled from her lips. “But had I paid attention to what he was doing and who he was meeting, I would have known.” So much guilt she carried.
“No,” he said quietly, that calm utterance breaking across her trembling voice. “You would not have.” Lucas took her by the shoulders and she stiffened, momentarily resisting his touch. He drew her back against his chest and some of the tension seeped from her frame as she leaned into him. The hint of lilac and lemons that clung to her skin wafted about with a cleansing purity. How right Eve felt in his arms, as though she belonged there. As though she’d always been meant to be here. He briefly rested his chin atop her brown, silken tresses and rubbed. “You could never have known to look for that evil, because you yourself were never capable of it.”
Eve turned to meet his gaze. Her abrupt movement knocked his arms back to his sides and he mourned the warmth of her tall, slender frame. Had he truly ever seen her as plain? How, when she radiated more beauty than any woman he’d had in his arms before her? Tears filled her eyes and the sight of those crystalline drops ravaged him. She blinked furiously. Did she seek to hide those signs of her grief? Warmth filled his chest. How very proud she was.
“I share his blood, Lucas. As such, those crimes cannot be separated from who I am. I—”
“You are your own person and cannot take ownership of anyone’s decisions but your own,” he said gruffly.
Chapter 8
...You cannot take ownership of anyone’s decisions but your own...
Lucas’ words echoed between them as Eve stood there, allowing them to wash over her.
How long had she done precisely that? The muscles of her throat worked and, God help her, she fell in love with Lucas Rayne. Loved him for seeing her as a person removed from her father’s crimes. She loved him as a man who didn’t see a servant but rather a woman—a woman of value and strength—who’d helped her see those gifts within herself.
He opened his mouth once more, but she went up on tiptoe and kissed him. He went still. Then with a groan, Lucas guided her back against the wall and slanted his lips over hers again and again.
There was nothing gentle about this meeting. Eve moaned, tangling her fingers in his hair and layering herself against him. She parted her lips to receive him. He cupped her buttocks and she moaned again, but Lucas swallowed that sound. He ran his hands searchingly over her, coming up to palm her breast and through her modest nightshift, her nipple puckered under his ministrations.
“Lucas,” she pleaded, as he trailed his lips down the curve of her neck, sucking at the tender flesh where her pulse pounded.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered, his breath fanning her skin. The fire of his touch spread like an out of control blaze, threatening to burn with desire for him.
A bang penetrated the haze he’d cast and brought them apart. Their chests rose and fell in a like frantic rhythm. The distant footfalls of an approaching servant drew closer.
Lucas fixed his gaze briefly on the door and panic riddled his features, replacing all earlier desire.
Her heart tugged, hating the chains that bound him still. “Go,” she urged gently.
He hesitated and then with several long, silent strides, marched across the room and drew open a panel door built into the wall. And just like that, he left.
With Lucas gone, she wandered over to the hearth and gripped the stone mantel.
Lifting her gaze, Eve found that gleaming sword affixed above the mantel. It stared back, mocking her with the truth. With her lies. With the barrier that would forever exist between her and him. For no matter what bond they shared or how deeply he’d slipped inside her heart, she would always be an Ormond and he a Rayne. And love was not enough to ever—
The door opened, and she spun around. Her heart promptly sank to her toes. “Mr. Rayne,” she finished lamely. In a bid to shield herself, she folded her arms at her chest.
The tall, commanding gentleman stood framed in the doorway. His midnight black jacket and breeches enhanced the edge of danger to his dark good looks. Where Lucas’ gaze warmed her, this man’s iced her from the inside out. How was it possible for these two to share blood?
Mr. Rayne flicked a cool stare over her and briefly shifted his gaze over to the point beyond her shoulder where the gladius rested. Then he returned his eyes to Eve. “Miss Ormond,” he greeted and slowly yanked off his stark white evening gloves.
Desperate to place distance between her and Lucas’ brother, Eve cleared her throat. “If you’ll excuse me?” she murmured and took a step to leave, when his words registered. Her stomach lurched and she spun to face him.
His face was set in a hard, unforgiving mask. “Yes, that is right, Miss Ormond. I know precisely who you are,” he murmured, folding his arms at his chest.
Oh, God. She shot a hand out and steadied herself with the stone mantel.
“You see, my family has been robbed of our due too many times in history.” Mr. Rayne flicked a hand. “I’ll not bore you with the details, as I expect, you, being an Ormond, well knows them.” Abandoning that relaxed pose, he took a step forward and Eve sidestepped his advance. “My sister saw the gladius rightfully restored and hung here after Lucas’ return as a testament to our reversed fortune.” He flared his nostrils. “I have not, however, forgotten the battles waged and won for this sword and, as such, I’m far more suspicious of strangers who are granted rights to this home. I took the liberty of uncovering the details of my brother’s latest servant and returned the moment I pieced together who you, in fact, are.”
Understanding dawned. “You believe I’m here for the gladius?” she blurted. Of course, it made sense and he was deserved of that suspicion.
Mr. Rayne snapped his eyebrows into a single black line. “Are you saying you’re not?” Not allowing her to respond, he flicked her white sleeve. “Wandering inside this room where the gladius is held, in the dead of night in your nightshift.”
Heat burned her cheeks and she balled her hands. She’d rather be thought of as a thief than a whore meeting his brother. Eve cast a desperate look beyond Mr. Rayne’s shoulder, searching, hoping—
“I want you gone,” the gentleman stated bluntly, wringing a gasp from her.
She shook her head as panic set her heart beating a frantic staccato. He’d order her gone and never again would she see Lucas. What would happen to Lucas and all that slight forward momentum he had made? Eve fought for a semblance of calm and found pride when her words emerged smooth and unaffected. “I am no thief,” she said coolly, favoring him with an up and down glance that earned another hard frown. She may be the daughter of a traitor but she was not responsible for their crimes. Lucas had shown her that. “Nor are you my employer. I’m here in your father’s employ and in Captain Rayne’s.” Lucas will not send me away.
“I raced here as soon as I learned your identity. My family is close to follow, at which point my father will order you gone.”
Oh, God. She drew in a jagged painful breath. “What about what Lucas...?” His eyes narrowed at that familiar address. “Captain Rayne,” she swiftly amended, “…wants?”
“Tell me,” he asked with a casualness that set her teeth on edge. “Do you truly believe my brother will want you here when he discovers who you are?”
“Yes.” The answer sprang immediately to her lips. A man who could see past her connection to the traitor who’d landed him in a French prison, was a man who could forgive her birthright.
Mr. Rayne tightened his mouth. “Very well. My father, however, will not. His love for the legend and power of that sword,” he motioned to the weapon at her back, “runs deep and true. And your insisting Lucas choose you over his own sire, proves the selfishness in your soul.” He sneered at her with that same derision that had stripped her of so much pride through the years. “Then, sacrificing my family’s peace for your own well-being? What else would one expect of a traitor’s daughter?”
Only For Her Honor Page 6
