Tvril was giving instructions to a group of his staff when I arrived. I stopped just beyond the open door, listening idly but not interrupting or making my presence known, as he told a young woman, No. There wont be another warning. When the signal comes, youll have one chance. If youre still near the shaft when it comes He said nothing more.
The grim silence that fell in the wake of his words was what finally caught my attention. This sounded like more than the usual instructions to clean rooms or deliver food more quickly. I stepped closer to the doorway to listen, and that was when one of Tvrils people spotted me. He must have made some sort of signal to Tvril, because Tvril immediately looked my way. He stared at me for half a breath, then told his people, Thank you; thats all.
I stood aside to let the servants disperse through the doorway, which they did with a brisk efficiency and lack of chatter that I found unsurprising. Tvril had struck me as the type to run a tight ship. When the room was clear, Tvril bowed me inside and shut the door behind us in deference to my rank.
How may I help you, Cousin? he asked.
I wanted to ask him about the shaft, whatever that was, and the signal, whatever that was, and why his staff looked as though he had just announced an execution. It was obvious, though, that he preferred not to speak of it. His movements were ever so slightly forced as he beckoned me to a seat in front of his desk and offered me wine. I saw his hand tremble as he poured it, until he noticed me watching and set the carafe down.
He had saved my life; for that I owed him courtesy. So I said only, Where do you think Lord Relad might be about now?
He opened his mouth to reply, then paused, frowning. I saw him consider attempting to dissuade me, then decide against it. He closed his mouth, then said, The solarium, most likely. He spends most of his idle time there.
Tvril had shown me this the day before, during my tour of the palace. Skys uppermost levels culminated in a number of platforms and airy spires, most of which contained the apartments and entertainments of the fullbloods. The solarium was one of the entertainments: a vast glass-ceilinged chamber of tropical plants, artfully made couches and grottoes, and pools for bathing or other things. Tvril had not led me far inside during our tour, but Id caught a glimpse of movement through the fronds and heard a cry of unmistakable ardor. I had not pressed Tvril for a further look, but now it seemed I would have no choice.
Thank you, I said, and rose.
Wait, he said, and went behind his desk. He rummaged through the drawers for a moment, then straightened, holding a small, beautifully painted ceramic flask. He handed this to me.
See if that helps, he said. He could buy himself bucketsful if he wanted, but he likes being bribed.
I pocketed the flask and memorized the information. Yet the whole exchange raised a new question. Tvril, why are you helping me?
I wish I knew, he replied, sounding abruptly weary. Its clearly bad for me; that flask cost me a months wages. I was saving it for whenever I needed a favor from Relad.
I was wealthy now. I made a mental note to order three of the flasks sent to Tvril in compensation. Then why?
He looked at me for a long moment, perhaps trying to decide the answer for himself. Finally he sighed. Because I dont like what theyre doing to you. Because youre like me. I honestly dont know.
Like him. An outsider? He had been raised here, had as much connection to the Central Family as me, but he would never be a true Arameri in Dekartas eyes. Or did he mean that I was the only other decent, honorable soul in the whole place? If that was true.
Did you know my mother? I asked.
He looked surprised. Lady Kinneth? I was a child when she left to be with your father. I cant say I remember her well.
What do you remember?
He leaned against the edge of his desk, folding his arms and thinking. In the Skystuff light his braided hair shone like copper rope, a color that would have seemed unnatural to me only a short time before. Now I lived among the Arameri and consorted with gods. My standards had changed.
She was beautiful, he said. Well, the Central Family are all beautiful; what nature doesnt give them, magic can. But it was more than that with her. He frowned to himself. She always seemed a little sad to me, somehow. I never saw her smile.
I remembered my mothers smile. She had done it more often while my father was alive, but sometimes she had smiled for me, too. I swallowed against a knot in my throat, and coughed to cover it. I imagine she was kind to you. She always liked children.
No. Tvrils expression was sober. He had probably noticed my momentary lapse, but thankfully he was too much the diplomat to mention it. She was polite, certainly, but I was only a halfblood, being raised by servants. It would have been strange if shed shown kindness, or even interest, toward any of us.
I frowned before I could stop myself. In Darr, my mother had seen to it that all the children of our servants got gifts for their birthing days and light-dedication ceremonies. During the hot, thick Darr summers, she had allowed the servants to take their rest hours in our garden, where it was cooler. Shed treated our steward like a member of the family.
I was a child, Tvril said again. If you want a better recollection, you should speak to the older servants.
Is there anyone youd recommend?
Any of them will speak to you. As for which one might remember your mother bestthat I cant say. He shrugged.
Not quite what Id hoped for, but it was something Id have to look into later. Thank you again, Tvril, I said, and went in search of Relad.
* * *
In a childs eyes, a mother is a goddess. She can be glorious or terrible, benevolent or filled with wrath, but she commands love either way. I am convinced that this is the greatest power in the universe.
My mother
No. Not yet.
* * *
In the solarium the air was warm and humid and fragrant with flowering trees. Above the trees rose one of Skys spiresthe centralmost and tallest one, whose entrance must have been somewhere amid the winding paths. Unlike the rest of the spires, this one quickly tapered to a point only a few feet in diameter, too narrow to house apartments or chambers of any great size. Perhaps it was purely decorative.
If I kept my eyes half-lidded, I could ignore the spire and almost imagine I was in Darr. The trees were wrongtoo tall and thin, too far apart. In my land the forests were thick and wet and dark as mysteries, full of tangled vines and small hidden creatures. Still, the sounds and smells were similar enough to assuage my homesickness. I stayed there until the sound of nearby voices pushed my imagination away.
Pushed sharply; one of the voices was Sciminas.
I could not hear her words, but she was very close. Somewhere in one of the alcoves ahead, concealed behind a copse of brush and trees. The white-pebbled path beneath my feet ran in that direction and probably branched toward it in some way that would make my approach obvious to anyone there.
To the infinite hells with obviousness, I decided.
My father had been a great huntsman before his death. Hed taught me to roll my feet in a forest, so as to minimize the crackle of leaf litter. And I knew to stay low, because it is human nature to react to movement at eye level, while that which is higher or lower often goes unnoticed. If this had been a Darren forest, I would have climbed the nearest tree, but I could not easily climb these skinny, bare-trunked things. Low it was.
When I got closejust barely close enough to hear, but any closer and I risked being seenI hunkered down at the foot of a tree to listen.
Come, Brother, its not too much, is it? Sciminas voice, warm and cajoling. I could not help shivering at the sound of it, both in remembered fear and anger. She had set a god on me, like a trained attack dog, for her own amusement. It had been a long time since Id hated anyone so fiercely.
Anything you want is too much, said a new voicemale, tenor, with a petulant edge. Relad? Go away and let me think.
You know these darkling races, Brother. They have no p
atience, no higher reason. Always angry over things that happened generations ago I lost the rest of her words. I could hear occasional footsteps, which meant that she was pacing, toward me and away. When she moved away, it was hard to hear her. Just have your people sign the supply agreement. Its nothing but profit for them and for you.
That, sweet Sister, is a lie. You would never offer me anything solely for my benefit. A weary sigh, a mutter I didnt catch, and then: Go away, I said. My head hurts.
Im sure it does, given your indulgences. Sciminas voice had changed. It was still cultured, still light and pleasant, but the warmth had left it now that Relad clearly meant to refuse her. I marveled that such a subtle change could make her sound so different. Very well; Ill come back when youre feeling better. By the way. Have you met our new cousin?
I held my breath.
Come here, Relad said. I knew at once he was speaking to someone else, perhaps a servant; I couldnt imagine him using that peremptory tone with Scimina. No. I hear you tried to kill her, though. Was that wise?
I was only playing. I couldnt resist; shes such a serious little thing. Do you know, she honestly believes shes a contender for Uncles position?
I stiffened. So, apparently, did Relad, because Scimina added, Ah. You didnt realize?
You dont know for sure. The old man loved Kinneth. And the girl is nothing to us.
You really should read more of our family history, Brother. The pattern And she paced away. Infuriating. But I did not dare creep closer, because only a thin layer of branches and leaves separated me from them. This close, they would hear me breathing if they listened hard enough. All I had to count on was their absorption in the conversation.
There were a few more comments exchanged between them, most of which I missed. Then Scimina sighed. Well, you must do as you see fit, Brother, and I shall do the same, as always.
Good luck. Was this quiet wish sincere or sarcastic? I guessed the latter, but there was something in it that hinted at the former. I could not tell without seeing him.
And to you, Brother. I heard the click of her heels along the path stones, rapidly fading.
I sat where I was against the tree for a long while, waiting for my nerves to settle before I attempted to leave. My thoughts, too, though that took longer, as they whirled in the aftermath of what Id heard. She honestly believes shes a contender. Did that mean I wasnt? Relad apparently believed I was, but even he wondered, as I did: why had Dekarta brought me to Sky?
Something to ponder for later. First things first. Rising, I began to make my careful way back through the brushbut before I could, the branches parted not five feet away, and a man stumbled through. Blond, tall, well-dressed, with a fullblood mark: Relad. I froze, but it was too late; I was standing in plain sight, caught in midcreep. But to my utter amazement, he didnt see me. He walked over to a tree, unfastened his pants, and began voiding his bladder with much sighing and groaning.
I stared at him, unsure what to be more disgusted by: his choice to urinate in a public place, where others would smell his reek for days; his utter obliviousness; or my own carelessness.
Still, I had not been caught yet. I could have ducked back down, hidden myself behind a tree, and probably gone unnoticed. But perhaps an opportunity had presented itself. Surely a brother of Scimina would appreciate boldness from his newest rival.
So I waited until he finished and fastened his clothing. He turned to go, and probably still wouldnt have seen me if I hadnt chosen that moment to clear my throat.
Relad started and turned, blinking blearily at me for a full three breaths before either of us spoke.
Cousin, I said at last.
He let out a long sigh that was hard to interpret. Was he angry? Resigned? Both, perhaps. I see. So you were listening.
Yes.
Is this what they teach you in that jungle of yours?
Among other things. I thought I might stick to what I know best, Cousin, since no one has seen fit to tell me the proper way Arameri do things. I was actually hoping you might help me with that.
Help you He started to laugh, then shook his head. Come on, then. You might be a barbarian, but I want to sit down like a civilized man.
This was promising. Already Relad seemed saner than his sister, though that wasnt difficult. Relieved, I followed him through the brush into the clearing. It was a lovely little spot, so meticulously landscaped that it looked natural, except in its impossible perfection. A large boulder, contoured in exactly the right ways to serve as a lounging chair, dominated one side of the space. Relad, none too steady on his feet to begin with, slumped into this with a heavy sigh.
Across from the seat was a bathing pool, too small to hold more than two people comfortably. A young woman sat here: beautiful, nude, with a black bar on her forehead. A servant, then. She met my eyes and then looked away, elegantly expressionless. Another young womanclothed in a diaphanous gown so sheer she might as well have been nudecrouched near Relads lounge, holding a cup and flask on a tray. I made no wonder that hed had to relieve himself, seeing this; the flask was not small, and it was nearly empty. Amazing he could still walk straight.
There was nowhere for me to sit, so I clasped my hands behind my back and stood in polite silence.
All right, then, Relad said. He picked up an empty glass and peered at it, as if checking for cleanliness. It had obviously been used. What in every demons unknown name do you want?
As I said, Cousin: help.
Why would I possibly help you?
We could perhaps help each other, I replied. I have no interest in becoming heir after Grandfather. But I would be more than willing to support another candidate, under the right circumstances.
Relad picked up the flask to pour a glass, but his hand wavered so badly that he spilled a third of it. Such waste. I had to fight the urge to take it from him and pour properly.
Youre useless to me, he said at last. Youd only get in my wayor worse, leave me vulnerable to her. Neither of us needed clarification on who he meant by her.
She came here to meet with you about something completely different, I said. Do you think its a coincidence she mentioned me in the process? It seems to me that a woman does not discuss one rival with anotherunless she hopes to play them against each other. Perhaps she perceives us both as threats.
Threats? He laughed, then tossed back the glass of whatever-it-was. He couldnt have tasted it that fast. Gods, youre as stupid as you are ugly. And the old man honestly thinks youre a match for her? Unbelievable.
Heat flashed through me, but I had heard far worse in my life; I kept my temper. Im not interested in matching her. I said it with more edge than I would have preferred, but I doubted he cared. All I want is to get out of this godsforsaken place alive.
The look he threw me made me feel ill. It wasnt cynical, or even derisive, just horrifyingly matter-of-fact. Youll never get out, that look said, in his flat eyes and weary smile. You have no chance.
But instead of voicing this aloud, Relad spoke with a gentleness that unnerved me more than his scorn. I cant help you, Cousin. But I will offer one piece of advice, if youre willing to listen.
I would welcome it, Cousin.
My sisters favorite weapon is love. If you love anyone, anything, beware. Thats where shell attack.
I frowned in confusion. Id had no important lovers in Darr, produced no children. My parents were already dead. I loved my grandmother, of course, and my uncles and cousins and few friends, but I could not see how
Ah. It was plain as day, once I thought about it. Darr itself. It was not one of Sciminas territories, but she was Arameri; nothing was beyond her reach. I would have to find some means of protecting my people.
Relad shook his head as if reading my mind. You cant protect the things you love, Cousinnot forever. Not completely. Your only real defense is not to love in the first place.
I frowned. Thats impossible. How could any human being live like that?
He smiled, and it made
me shiver. Well. Good luck, then.
He beckoned to the women. Both of them rose from their places and came over to his couch, awaiting his next command. That was when I noticed: both were tall, patrician, beautiful in that flat, angular Amn way, and sable-haired. They did not look much like Scimina, but the similarity was undeniable.
Relad gazed at them with such bitterness that for a moment, I felt pity. I wondered whom he had loved and lost. And I wondered when I had decided that Relad was as useless to me as I was to him. Better to struggle alone than rely on this empty shell of a man.
Thank you, Cousin, I replied, and inclined my head. Then I left him to his fantasies.
On my way back to my room, I stopped at Tvrils office and returned the ceramic flask. Tvril put it away without a word.
9
Memories
THERE IS A SICKNESS CALLED the Walking Death. The disease causes tremors, terrible fever, unconsciousness, and in its final stages a peculiar kind of manic behavior. The victim is compelled to rise from the sickbed and walkwalk anywhere, even back and forth in the confines of a room. Walk, while the fever grows so great that the victims skin cracks and bleeds; walk while the brain dies. And then walk a little more.
There have been many outbreaks of the Walking Death over the centuries. When the disease first appeared, thousands died because no one understood how it spread. The walking, you see. Unimpeded, the infected always walk to wherever healthy people can be found. They shed their blood and die there, and thus the sickness is passed on. Now we are wise. Now we build a wall around any place the Death has touched, and we close our hearts to the cries of the healthy trapped within. If they are still alive a few weeks later, we let them out. Survival is not unheard of. We are not cruel.
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