by David Horne
Sawyer smiled and leaned in to kiss me. It was soft, gentle and I felt my entire body swoon before Sawyer stepped back. “See you in a bit,” he said before he walked away, and I watched him disappear up the stairs and toward our suite. Something was happening here, and I didn’t know what to do about it.
Chapter Twelve
Sawyer
Carter was leaving his room to head back downstairs when I’d reached the door to our suite. He must have seen something on my face because his brows furrowed, and he rushed over to me. I was hoping I could get in my room and have some space to think but it seemed that wasn’t going to happen.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked as he studied my face.
“It’s nothing, I’m just tired,” I said and looked away, but Carter wasn’t stupid.
“Nope, no way. Something is wrong. Come on, let’s head inside so we can talk.”
“Carter-” I began but he held up his hand to stop me from speaking further. He was simply a commanding thing when he wanted to be.
“No. Something is going on with you and I know how you get. You’ll sit in here and drive yourself crazy thinking about whatever is you’re thinking about and somehow talk yourself out of something that might actually be good for you. FYI, I’m pretty sure the look on your face has to do with Logan and I’m not going to let you ruin something good for you because you want to mope like an idiot and convince yourself that you’re no good together.”
I blinked rapidly as he took my key card from my hands and opened the door to the suite. Had I been being that obvious? Had Logan seen what was happening in my heart and head?
I followed Carter inside and went to sit in the living room area while Carter grabbed us some drinks from the mini fridge. I had so much going on in my head and it probably wasn’t a good idea to use my brother as a sound board. He handed me a soda before he sat across from me and just stared. I stared back and we sat like that for three minutes before I sighed and tossed up my hands.
“When did you become so stubborn?” I grumbled and Carter only smiled as he sat patiently and waited for me to gather my thoughts.
I wasn’t sure where I wanted to begin or how to work out everything that was going on in my head so I just spoke what was on my heart.
“I’m falling for him,” I said, and a small smile appeared on my brother’s face. “He- he gave me a bracelet. It’s cheap but beautiful and… I don’t know Carter. Something clicked in me when he put this damn thing on my arm.” I waved my arm where the bracelet sat on my wrist. I didn’t ever want to take it off and wasn’t that a revelation.
“He gets under my skin, ya know? And I like him there. I like teasing him and watching his reactions. Then today, that fucking instructor was looking at Logan like he was a pile of meat and I wanted to rip his balls off. The thought of anyone touching him makes me murderous. I don’t get jealous Carter. I’ve never been a jealous guy.”
And it was the truth. I’d never been jealous in my other relationships. I’d had no reason to be. I’d been so confident in who I was that I knew my partner’s thought I was the best thing in the world. But with Logan, I wasn’t sure of that. And a lot of it had to do with the fact he’d spent years being in love with my brother. Would he look at me and only see Carter? Would he secretly wish I was Carter? It was driving me insane and I hated it.
“I’ve never seen you like this. Not even with Hayden.”
At the mention of my ex, I felt my heart steel itself. And Carter saw it.
“Don’t,” he growled. “Don’t you do that Sawyer. Logan is nothing like Hayden. He doesn’t deserve for you to push him out because of what Hayden did to you. It isn’t fair. So, wherever your head is trying to take you, turn the fuck around. If you let him be the reason you miss out on something amazing then you deserve to be alone.”
My eyes slammed shut as memories of Hayden and I rushed to the surface. He’d been my best friend. We’d grown up together, gone to medical school together and all that time, I’d been hopelessly in love with him. He was everything to me and then one day, I told him. And he’d told me he loved me too. He was my entire world. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. I was sure that he was it for me and that we’d be together forever, and I’d asked him to marry me. He’d said yes and I’d never been happier in my life. I had the man I loved, and we were going to get married
We’d gone back home after we graduated and started planning our wedding. The entire town had been buzzing about it. Then, a week before our wedding, a man showed up at our house. He sat me down and told me he’d been sleeping with Hayden for almost four years, that he loved Hayden and how Hayden didn’t really want to get married.
I’d been devastated and so damn angry. The man left and when Hayden came home, I confronted him. He’d cried and pleaded. Said it was a mistake that he’d never do it again. But the trust was gone. My faith in him was gone. My heart was destroyed, and I didn’t think it would ever be healed again. Hayden had broken me. I called off the wedding and took on a job with DWB (Doctors Without Borders). I wanted to be as far away from Hayden, and I could possibly get. And I stayed gone. I couldn’t face the town and the whispers of my failed engagement. I’d told myself I’d never fall in love again. It wasn’t worth it.
Yet, there I was, pretty sure I was well on my way to falling in love with Logan. It was sudden and unexpected. But I’d felt something that first night we’d hooked up. Something that had settled deep in my gut that I didn’t want to put a finger on. Our connection had been off the charts. I’d never felt so strongly about a stranger. And it’s only grown with every second I’ve spent in his presence.
“This is insane,” I grumbled. “It’s been days, Carter. People don’t’ fall in love in days. This isn’t a fairy tale.”
“I knew I loved Kimmy the first time she smiled at me.”
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “You were fourteen years old.”
Carter shrugged and grinned. “True but it didn’t make my feelings any less real. I love her as much today as I did then. Hell, I love her more. All I’m saying is, I don’t believe there should be a limit on love. You’ve seen the kind of person he is. You like what it is you see, and I find nothing wrong with that. Should you guys take your time and get to know each other better? Absolutely. But don’t push what you’re feeling away, just because you feel a little scared. You could be missing out on the best thing that’s ever happened to you.”
I thought of Logan and the smile he wore after his dive. He’d looked so beautiful and peaceful that I found myself wishing I could keep that look on his face for the rest of my life. The need to make him happy was so damn strong that it shook me. Then he gave me that sweet as fuck kiss and I wanted to protect him with all that I had. It was unexpected and scared the hell out of me.
“What if he can’t love me back?” I asked and didn’t dare look my brother in the eye. I didn’t like feeling insecure and I sure as shit didn’t want him to know that I was feeling like this because of him. But Carter again proved to me that he was a whole lot smarter than I gave him credit for.
“You mean because of his crush on me?’
My head snapped up and found Carter grinning. “You know?” I asked and he sighed.
“Of course, I know. I’m not an idiot. Look, Sawyer hasn’t had a lot of good people in his life and I was one of the first people he allowed himself to get close too. I figured he latched on to his feelings for me because I was good to him. I never thought much of it and figured he’d get over it eventually. I never said anything or called him out on it because I didn’t want to embarrass him. I remained his friend. I never made him think otherwise and I knew that one day, someone would come along and he’d forget about me. Little did I know it would be you.”
I stared up at the ceiling as all of my emotions hit me in waves. This was crazy, all of it. “Carter, this is insane. How can I be in love with a man who was in love with my little brother?”
Silence filled the room and I listed
my head and saw Carter had gone pale.
“I-in love with me?” he said before he shook his head. “Logan wasn’t in love with me Sawyer. It was… it was just a crush. Right?”
“Fuck,” I grumbled and watched Carter’s eyes go big before his and covered his mouth. “Carter-” I began but tears were already building in my brother’s eyes.
“He was in love with me?” he asked, his voice only a whisper. “He was in love with me and I… holy fuck Sawyer. I talked about Kimmy all the time. Every day I was basically throwing it in his face that I’d never love him, and I didn’t even realize it. Oh fuck. He must think I’m a horrible friend. I feel like a horrible friend, then I dragged him on this trip, and he has to watch me with Kimmy. Oh, God.”
“Carter, calm down,” I said and placed a hand on my brothers bouncing knee. I hadn’t realized Carter didn’t understand how deep Logan’s feelings were for him and I felt like a tool for letting it come out the way it did. Yes, I believed Carter deserved to know, but not like this.
“Listen, I think he’s getting over his feelings for you and I’m sure he’ll realize it wasn’t really love. Like you said, he isn’t used to having good people in his life. Maybe he just latched on to you because you were all he had. But he thinks the world of you dude. You’re his best friend and nothing will change that. So please, stop freaking out and don’t make things weird. He doesn’t need that right now. I’m sure he’s probably having a lot of mixed emotions as well and we don’t need to make it worse.”
Carter sucked in a deep breath before letting it out slowly. He did this a few times before I saw him calm. “Sorry, that really just caught me by surprise. I promise, I won’t make things weird.”
Just then the door opened, and Logan stepped inside, rolling in a cart. “They were serving a buffet for lunch, so I grabbed a little bit of everything. By the way have you seen Carter? Kimmy’s looking for him.” He glanced up and spotted Carter on the couch and frowned as he glanced between us. “Everything all right?” He asked as he rolled the cart to a stop in front of me.
We both watched as he produced an empty plate and began piling it with food before he handed it to me. Logan probably didn’t realize what he’d done or that it was at all a big deal, but it was for me. He’d served me before Carter or himself. He made sure I was okay before anyone else in the room and my heart exploded.
“You hungry?” he asked Carter with a wave to the cart. “There’s plenty, help yourself. I need to hit the can.” Then he leaned down and kissed me. Another of those sweet, heart bursting kisses. “Eat up, you look pale.” And with that he disappeared into the bathroom.
Carter and I stared after him and Carter chuckled. I glanced at him and found he was smiling and relaxed. “Okay, I think you’re right. Whatever he felt for me, I think that just proved, it’s gone now.”
I stared at the plate on my lap and then back at my brother. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with him.”
Carter left a little after Logan emerged from the bathroom. He said he was going to go downstairs and eat and that he’d catch us later. Carter whispered something to Sawyer on his way out and Sawyer grinned before he patted Carter’s shoulder and sent him on his way.
“What was that about?” I asked and Logan only shrugged. He made his own plate and sat next to me on the couch.
“Thought you were going to sleep,” he said as he took a bite from his plate. “Or did you just want to get away from me?” he paused after he said and then he stood. “Fuck.” He grumbled and placed his plate back on the cart. “I didn’t even think about that. Sorry, I should have realized you just needed space.”
He began to move toward the door and I was on my feet in seconds. I placed my plate on the table and ran to stop Logan from leaving.
“Stop, I promise you baby, that’s not it.” Logan didn’t meet my eyes and I placed my hand under his chin and forced his eyes to meet mine. He looked sad and worried and there was no way in hell I was letting that look remain on his face. I stepped in close so our bodies were touching.
“Logan, I don’t want space. Not from you.” He studied my face for a long time before he spoke.
“You sure? I know we’ve been sort of forced together and I don’t want to get in your way if you’re getting sick of me always being around.”
“I like you being around. In case you haven’t noticed.” I placed my hand on his hip and pulled him closer. I pressed my dick into his and he groaned at the contact. “I’d keep you in this room for the rest of this trip. But I’m not that selfish.”
I brushed a kiss along his jaw and he sighed. I felt his body relax into mine and I wrapped my arms around his waist. “Don’t ever question whether I want you around or not. The answer is I do. I definitely want you around.”
His arms wrapped around me and his hands began roaming my back before they landed on my ass and squeezed. I moaned and decided to take a handful of my own. I felt his dick begin to lengthen and I didn’t have to will power to walk away.
“Tell me I can touch you,” I growled. “Fuck, Logan, please tell me I can touch you.” I almost sounded desperate but I didn’t care. I needed my hands on him.
“Yes,” he whispered and I groaned as my hands slipped beneath his shirt and felt the warmth of his skin. “Touch me, Sawyer.”
I pulled his shirt up over his head and was greeted with his naturally tanned skin. His chest was sculpted to perfection and I wanted to lick every inch of him.
My hands pressed again his six pack and slowly ran themselves over each ripple of muscle. Logan shook at my touch as if desperate for more and I wanted to give him everything he desired.
“What do you need, baby?” I asked as I continued to make my way up his chest. My thumbs brushed over his nipples and he hissed in pleasure. I did it again and Logan moaned a curse. “You like that?” I asked and he nodded his head quickly. “Good, get on the bed, I need to taste your skin.”
Logan’s breathing was harsh as he moved toward the bed, his heated gaze, never leaving mine. He kicked off his shoes before he pushed himself to the middle of the bed.
I stood at the edge and looked down at his golden skin and ripped muscles. He was truly something right out of my fantasies. I wanted him desperately.
I placed a knee on the bed before I crawled over to him. He watched me with lust filled eyes and I lost the remainder of my patience. I started as his nipples, licking and sucking until he was begging me to touch him.
“Fuck. Sawyer, please baby, touch me.”
Who was I to deny him?” I kissed down his over his chest and down his abs, licking at the muscles there. I teased the skin ear the waist band of his shorts before I flicked the button and pulled the shorts from his body. His dick was forming a tent in his briefs and I groaned at the sight of it. I’d have loved nothing more than to straddle his waist and ride him until we both came but I had other plans. I needed inside of him. Needed to claim him as much as he’d claimed me.
I ran my hand over his hard erection, and he groaned at the contact. I stroked him through the fabric over and over again until he was thrusting into my hand.
“Off, take them off. Need to feel your skin on mine,” he groaned as he continued his thrusts.
I made quick work of removing his briefs and tossing them over my shoulder. I took in his body in all its naked glory. He was seriously the sexiest man I’d ever laid eyes on.
“Are you gonna keep staring like you want to eat me? Or are you going to do it?”
I grinned at his sassy words and took him in my hand. He groaned as I tightened my grip on his shaft and began a slow stroke up and down his hard length. He as hard as steel and my chest puffed up knowing I was the reason he was so aroused.
The need to taste him filled my head and I bent over his body and licked the pre-cum from his slit. Logan and I both groaned for different reasons. I’d almost forgotten how good he tasted, and I needed to get reacquainted. I took the head of his cock in my mouth and began
to swirl and taste it with my tongue before I began to lap and suck at the rest of his length.
Logan groaned and moaned above me as I moved up and down on his hard length. “Right their baby. Oh fuck, your mouth is so good.”
I loved the praise and doubled my efforts. I stroked him with a tight fist as I sucked and soon, he was moaning and mumbling incoherently. I loved the way I was making him feel and knew I could do better. I sucked and stroked him until his knees began to shake and I knew he was close to orgasm.
I pulled off and continued to stroke him gently. “Fuck, you’re going to kill me,” he said through heavy pants. “Need you Sawyer. Need you inside of me.”
“On your knees. Ass in the air,” I growled, and Logan whimpered as he did what he was told. My dick was pulsing, and I knew I needed inside of him. I quickly removed my clothes before I grabbed a condom and lube from the bedside table. I quickly popped the cap and drizzled some onto Logan’s hole. I rubbed the lube in with my thumb and Logan groaned as I began working my thumb inside his tight hole.
“Fuck,” I groaned as his warmth surrounded me. He was incredibly tight, so I took my time working in my finger. I opened him up as much as I could, loving the sounds that were coming from him.
“Want my dick, baby?” I asked as I began sliding the condom on.
“Yes, fuck yes,” he groaned.
I was aching with my need for him. Aching so bad that I was trembling with it. I needed him. I needed him more than I’d ever needed anyone. I needed this to be good for both of us because I had no intention of ever letting Logan walk away from me. I’d never been this desperate for another person. It was consuming me, and I didn’t mind it.
I pressed the head of my cock to his hole and slowly began working my way in. My head flew back as I pushed past the first barrier of muscle and was met with tight, slick heat. Logan groaned as I gripped his hips and began to slowly move in and out of him.
“You’re so tight,” I groaned as I worked myself in and out. He was gripping me hard and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I blew my load. He felt incredible and I knew it wouldn’t be the last time I’d slide inside of his perfect body.
