She smiled at me. “Being a single father isn’t easy, is it?”
“Hell nah,” I grunted with a shake of my head.
“Look, Coop! I did it!” Joy beamed as she pointed at her homework sheet with her pencil.
I looked down at Joy’s attempt to write out three-letter sight words. “Good job. Now finish the rest.”
She nodded. “Okay!”
“He’s a good baby, though,” I told Angel.
“Yes, he is,” Angel cooed as she smiled into Keyes’ face.
Looking around the living room, I noticed some moving boxes tied together and lying against the wall. “What’s with the moving boxes?” I suddenly got nervous that she was running away from the bad memories in Chicago and moving away.
Finally, I saw a genuine smile on Angel’s face. “Joy and I are moving in with Russell.”
Relieved, I smiled. “Word?”
She nodded lovingly. “Yep.”
“That’s what’s up.”
“It is. I’m happy to have him. He’s so good to me.”
“Good for you. Have you heard from Jameel?”
Angel’s eyes rolled. “On my voicemail,” she grunted. “He’s been demanding that I hand Joy over to him. I’m just waiting for the moment that he shows up at my front door to take her away from me. Luckily, I’ll be moved out soon, and he doesn’t know where Russell lives. I just pray to God that I win custody at court.”
“I can handle that for you.”
Angel looked at me for a long time. As she gave me that stern look, I saw so much of my baby, True, in her face. She and True were not twins, but they did share similar features and made the same facial expressions. Instead of sadness, I felt like True was finally in the room with me, and it felt good.
Angel sighed long and deeply as she tore her eyes away from mine. She knew I was a street nigga, so she was aware of how I intended on handling Jameel had she even looked like she wanted me to. “No,” she said, but I heard the reluctance in her voice. “I don’t need you to handle Jameel. Don’t go back anywhere near him, Coop. Do you hear me?”
She looked back at me, and I was too much of a man to lie to a grieving mother, so I said nothing.
“Coop,” she fussed. “I’m serious. You’re lucky you didn’t end up in jail for damn near beating him to death. I’m still waiting on the cops to show up over that shit.”
I shrugged nonchalantly. “They can show up. That’s a case I’ll be glad to fight.”
“No. The last thing Keyes needs is to lose another parent for any reason. You no longer have permission to do anything that will land you in jail or the grave. Do you hear me?”
Still, I didn’t have any answer, so she sat up on the edge of the couch as mothers do whenever they wanted to be taken seriously. She leaned towards me with a tight jaw. “Coop.”
I chuckled. “Okay.”
“Promise me you won’t touch him,” she insisted.
“I won’t.”
Despite me giving in, she went on, “You have a rec center now. You’re supposed to be an example now.”
I laughed at the way she fussed with her eyebrows curled. I had never had a mother figure, and it was funny to me to have such a tiny woman calling herself telling me what to do. “Okay, okay.”
Watching my smile, she sighed with relief and went back to admiring Keyes. As I watched her, I realized that although Keyes had lost his mother, he still had a mother figure. And even Joy would have a father figure because I didn’t plan on going anywhere.
Just then, Angel’s doorbell rang, and a smile crept on her face.
“Be right back,” she told me as she stood.
Carrying Keyes with her, she disappeared out of the living room towards the front door. Because of her smile, I assumed that Russell was ringing the doorbell. I looked around at all the moving boxes with a grin. I was happy Angel had found Russell and now, she had someone to look after to her. I would always look after her too, but being the man in her life, Russell would look after her in a way she had needed years before that day.
But as I heard a familiar, feminine, sweet voice enter the house, I knew it wasn’t Russell. I could feel her. I could smell her. Goosebumps covered my dark skin against my will. I suddenly got nervous. I looked up towards the hallway as her voice came nearer, anticipating seeing her again. I was holding my breath until she appeared in the doorway, and I finally, finally exhaled. I felt like I had been holding my breath since that last time I’d seen her, and finally, just now, I was breathing again. She was beautiful. She was wearing the best foundation all over her body; her natural, glowing brown skin. If I were to hang her picture in heaven, so many angels would hide their faces in envy. And even though her beauty captured me, it was her amazing soul that left me speechless.
It had only been a week and a half that I had been avoiding her, but in that moment, I realized it felt like an eternity.
REMI
“C-Coop,” I stuttered. And then to avoid the way his eyes were burning a hole into my soul, I whipped my head around to Angel’s smiling face. “You didn’t tell me that Coop was going to be here. What’s going on?”
Angel placed a hand on my shoulder. “Have a seat on the couch, Remi.”
With interrogating eyes, I slowly walked towards the couch. I nervously avoided looking at Coop. I was unbelievably happy to be in his presence again. Too happy. My attraction to him was overwhelming me, and guilt was suffocating me.
I suddenly felt so vulnerable. I was wearing a pair of yellow, cotton Bermuda shorts and a matching cropped tank. But I suddenly felt naked sitting across from Coop as he sat on the floor, adorably helping Joy with homework.
We weren’t speaking or looking at one another, which was odd. We had gone from spending every day together to having no words between us. The tension between was thick. The sexual tension was impenetrable. Yet, the guilt was smothering.
I heard a giggle and looked up to see Angel shaking her head. “Okay,” she finally spoke. “I have something for both of you.”
She walked over to an end table and picked up a folded piece of paper. She then told Coop, “Get up and sit next to Remi.”
His eyes held as many questions as mine did as he did what he had been told. As he sat next to me, I felt so much energy between us. That same intensity had been between us as we spent so many late nights comforting one another and forcing ourselves to ignore our mutual attraction.
“Now, I want you both to please keep an open mind,” Angel instructed.
Coop and I stared at her intensely, waiting for her cure our curiosities. She handed me the letter, and I took it from her slowly, staring into her eyes blankly.
“You all should read it together,” she told us. “It’s from True.”
Hearing that, I starting to unfold it quickly, as Angel sat on the chaise. Coop quickly scooted closer to me. I leaned over into him so his eyes could read the words as well.
Dear Coop and Remi,
I knew you both would not be able to take heed to these words while I was alive, so I waited until after I was gone to tell them to you. Coop, I love the man that you became. I want you to be happy. I want you to have the love that you felt for me with a woman who can give you the happily ever after that I couldn’t. You deserve a woman who can spend a lifetime with you, and my son deserves a mother who can spend a lifetime with him. I want you to permanently have that feeling that changed you into the man that you are today. I fear that if you don’t, my son will have to watch you turn back into the man the streets once feared.
Remi, I did not have the opportunity to know you for very long. But I saw you care for my family and in particular, my children and Coop, in a way I hoped someone would come into their lives and love them once I was gone. It’s only right that you finally get in return the unconditional love that you have shown so many in your work and personal life.
I was able to pass peacefully because I knew my mother had Russell, my kids had Coop and my mother, and that
you two had each other. I was not too sick to see the chemistry between you two. I could feel the attraction you shared. I know you both respected me too much to act on it, and I love you both even more for that. But I want you to know that you have my blessing. Not only do you have my blessing, but I am asking you to please be there for one another in the way that only two people in love can. Be with each other, take care of each other, and love on each other so that I can truly rest in peace.
With love,
True
As I finished reading the letter, my hands shook. “W-what?” I had read it with my own eyes, but I was still in disbelief.
“Wait a minute.” Coop snatched the letter from my trembling hands and began to reread it as if he had read it wrong.
Rocking Keyes with a satisfied smile on her face, Angel told me and Coop, “She wants you two to be together. Not just for her, but for each other.”
I was speechless. Never had someone been so thoughtful. True was so selfless. Her words resonated in me and sparked tears. Admittedly, I felt some happiness. I felt relief that I could explore this attraction to Coop without the guilt. But, even though we had her permission and Angel’s blessing, it still felt so wrong.
“Man, this is crazy,” Coop grunted as he slammed the letter down on the couch.
He was obviously against this and, even though I understood why, I immediately felt the sting of rejection and disappointment.
“Why is it crazy?” Angel argued. “You’re attracted to her, aren’t you?” she challenged.
He couldn’t even look at me. Frustration filled his expression. Rather than feel touched, like I was, True’s words had left Coop angry.
“This is some bullshit,” he growled as he jumped up.
As he began to storm off, Angel called after him. “Coop!”
He kept storming out of the living room. Angel jumped up to follow him, but stopped when I stood too.
Embarrassment left me stuttering. “I-I should go.” Rejection was leading me to flee.
The sympathy in Angels eyes made matters even worse for me. She called out for me as I headed out of the living room. “Remi, don’t go.”
She struggled with deciding to follow me or Coop as I ignored her. I lightly jogged towards the door, hoping that Coop hadn’t run outside as well. Luckily, he hadn’t. I raced out of the house, hearing Angel calling me and Coop.
Making it to my truck just as the tears began, I flung the door open, wondering why no man ever chose me. Even when it was right and made sense, no man ever chose me.
ANGEL
“Finish your homework, Joy. I’ll be right back.” I scurried towards the hall. First, I ran to the front door to see Remi peeling out of the driveway. Sucking my teeth, I closed the door and then rushed through the house looking for Coop.
“Coop! Boy, where are you?!” I called out.
Once in the kitchen, I saw that my back door was opened. I rushed towards it and through it to find Coop plopped down on the patio couch, pouting like a big baby.
“Boy, what the hell is wrong with you?” I fussed as I sat beside him.
He grunted as he threw his face in his hands.
I understood his shock, but I hadn’t expected him to be so cold.
I couldn’t believe it myself when I’d finally read True’s letter that morning. However, as I thought about the times I’d seen Remi and Coop interacting, it was evident. I then remembered all the times True had forced them to be together alone. She had been orchestrating this shortly after meeting Remi. She must have seen their attraction to each other and their connection even though they had respected her enough to hide it.
Keyes started to squirm, so I rocked him as I berated Coop. “Why would you run out on that girl? You made her feel bad.”
Coop’s glaring eyes whipped towards me. “Exactly! Why would True put me in that position? She knew how I felt about getting involved with another woman. I’m not on that shit.”
I shook my head at his stubbornness. True had been right. He was already turning back into his old self. “Why not?”
His jaw clenched as he replied, “Because I avoided that shit for a reason. I ended up falling for True, and she only proved that my reasons for staying away from feelings and love was right. I just wanna raise my son and make my money. I ain’t trying to be involved in anything else that will take me off my focus from that.”
“You sound like me.” Coop sucked his teeth and turned away from me. I gently grabbed his chin and turned his eyes back to me. He respected my authority and gave me his attention. “I avoided men for years after my husband passed away. I had different reasons, but I felt strongly about it. But when I met Russell again, he changed my life. And I know you and True didn’t work out, but maybe that was because meeting her was supposed to lead you to the true love of your life… who may possibly be Remi.”
That’s when he pulled his chin out of my grasp and stood up. “Maaaaan…”
“I saw the look in your eyes when she walked in earlier,” I pushed. “I saw the relief. You have feelings for her.”
He grimaced but didn’t deny it. “That don’t mean I have to be with her.”
I sighed, saying, “Coop, don’t be…”
I stopped as he bent down and pried Keyes out of my arms. “No disrespect, Angel, but I have to go.”
I watched him in total shock of his temper tantrum as he walked away. He didn’t even go back into the house. He cut through the grass and stomped towards the gate. I shook my head as he stormed off. True had been absolutely right. I only had known the loving and devoted Coop. But True had told me the type of man that he had changed from. I couldn’t see it then, but it was undeniable now.
With a sigh, I went back into the house. My heart went out to both Coop and Remi. When my husband had passed, I had only hoped to have someone close to me to be there for me who understood my pain. My daughter was there for me, but there was nothing like the support of the person in love with you. That support is different and desperately needed. But I believed my late husband had sent me Russell. It had taken a few years, but I had gotten my happily ever after. Fortunately for Coop, he would get his, sooner than later, if only he would open up his heart to it.
I felt so bad, like I had failed at the task True had given me. But I didn’t plan on giving up. Yet, I knew better than to push Coop or Remi at the moment. I had just laid something pretty heavy on them. Therefore, I planned on giving them a few days to think about it before I started to nag.
“I’m finished!” Joy announced as I entered the living room. She stood up and waved the homework sheet in my face.
“Good job, baby.” I smiled as I looked it over. The tracings were sketchy, but for a five-year-old, that’s all her kindergarten teacher was going to get.
Just as I got ready to ask Joy what she wanted for lunch, the doorbell rang. I raced for the door, hoping it was Remi, Coop, or better yet, both. But as I peered through the peephole, my hope was crushed, and my heart was broken. With shaky hands, I opened the door for the two police officers standing on the other side of my door.
“Angel Jenkins?” one of the officers asked me.
“That’s her,” Jameel’s bitch ass confirmed behind them.
I trembled with fear, praying to God that this wasn’t the moment that the last family member I had to hold on to would be taken from me. “May I help you?” I asked the officers.
Jameel ripped, “Yeah, you can stop holding my daughter hostage!”
The Black officer cringed as he turned and gritted, “Sir. Please.”
The Hispanic officer spoke up, “I’m Officer Lopez, and this is my partner, Officer Brown. Do you have his daughter in your physical custody?”
I sighed deeply, contemplating what to do. I faulted myself for not going into hiding with Joy the moment True passed. I gritted, confessing, “Yes, but—”
“But nothing. I’m her father, and I have shared custody,” Jameel interrupted.
My eyes narrowed
as I glared behind the cops at Jameel’s punk ass. “Which you never shared until you were tired of paying child support. You don’t pay now. She’s dead. You’re free, so go!”
Officer Brown lifted a hand to stop my rambling. “Ma’am, legally, he has parental custody of the child.”
“But—”
“If you feel as if you have a right to custody, you can file for it and fight it out in court. But as for today, you have to give the child to her biological and legal father or we can arrest you for kidnapping.”
Tears stung my eyes and quickly began to flow. I stood firmly in the doorway holding the doorknob, refusing to budge.
With a slight step towards me, Officer Lopez urged, “Ma’am, please relinquish the child peacefully or we will arrest you and make this situation even harder. It’s your choice.”
Sucking my teeth, I lowered my head, feeling so defeated. “Okay,” I whimpered.
Reluctantly, I left the doorway. I heard their footsteps following me, so I spun around. “That son of a bitch is not allowed in my house.”
Laughing, Jameel shrugged. “Whatever.” He stood in the doorway, taunting me with his grin.
“Fuck you!” I spat as Officer Brown stood between us. “You would wait until my daughter is dead to pull this shit, you scary motherfucker!”
As he continued to laugh, Officer Lopez walked towards him to quiet him as Officer Brown guided me away from Jameel and into the house. With tears streaming down my face, I walked into the living room. I wanted to appear like everything was okay so Joy wouldn’t be scared, but I couldn’t. My heart was broken for myself and her. Her mother had already been taken from us. Now, they were about to separate us all because that punk wanted to be vindictive. At that moment, I felt regret for not allowing Russell and Coop to kill that motherfucker.
“Joy, baby, your father is here for you.” She looked up at me with confusion. I bent down, took her hand, and guided her to her feet.
When My Soul Met A Thug Page 22
