There is a well-known furniture chain that holds on to every customer order for seventy-two hours before putting it through to the home office. Why? Because it found that over 60 percent of people, within three days of a major purchase, will come back to change their mind about the color, a fabric, or the design. With too many choices most people freeze and take forever to decide, and once they do make a decision, their brain often churns with Did I make the right choice? Unless you’re in a retail situation where competition mandates selection, offer no more than three options, with two being ideal. No choices can lead to a person’s feeling his freedom is restricted and cause him to back off. Any option, even one, gives him a sense of empowerment and you want him to believe that he’s in control.
2. Give a Deadline
Giving a deadline for action fulfills three separate and very important psychological motivations for fostering action.
n A task will expand or contract depending upon how much time you allow for it. The world operates on deadlines and expiration dates because if there is no immediate need to move forward most people will not. It is human nature to wait until conditions become more favorable, or until we have more information, or until we are in a better mood before taking an action. It’s important to give a clear-cut deadline and let the person know that the action must be taken now because he may not have a chance to act later.
This also invokes another psychological motivation in that we don’t like our freedom to be restricted. Whenever we are told that we cannot have or do something we end up desiring it more. So by letting an individual know that he may not get the opportunity to act in the future, you create a larger incentive toward moving now. There is another well-known though less scrupulous retail store that puts “sold” tags on items that it wants to get rid of. They do it for this very reason. When we see a “sold” tag on something we are unconsciously driven to desire it more. Then when we find out that another “just like it” may be for sale we jump on the opportunity to purchase it.
Consistent with this law are numerous studies that show that human beings respond to that which is scarce and becoming scarcer. I’m sure you find this to be true in your own life. When something is the latest or hottest and everyone wants one, it becomes that much more desirable. And when the window of opportunity to act continues to shrink, we are driven to desire it that much more. We place value on that which is scarce. Diamonds, gold, and oil are not essential to our well-being yet they are highly valued—but only because of the perception that they are scarce. Think about it. Platinum is worth more than gold and gold more than silver and silver more than copper. All because of how much of it is available to us.
3. Use the Law of Inertia
Sir Isaac Newton first informed us that objects in motion tend to stay in motion, and objects at rest tend to stay at rest. He might well have added that people in motion tend to stay in motion and people at rest tend to stay at rest. If you are able to get the person moving in the right direction, either physically or mentally—starting with something easy and/or fun—he will likely continue to follow through. Why is this so?
Human beings have a strong need for consistency with their actions. Several studies in this area clearly illustrate how effective this psychological factor can be when applied to motivating a person. They show us that when someone is presented with a small request and subsequently does it, he is infinitely more likely to agree to a larger request—the thing that we wanted him to do in the first place—what we really wanted him to do. However, if he is not first presented with, and subsequently doesn’t complete, the smaller request, then he has no unconscious motivation for consistency.
Called the “foot-in-the-door technique,” the following study demonstrates the tendency for people who have first agreed to a small request to comply later with a larger request. Freedman and Fraser (1966) asked home owners if they would let them place a huge drive carefully sign in their front yards. Only 17 percent gave permission. Other residents, however, were first approached with a smaller request. They were asked to put up a three-inch be a safe driver window sign. Nearly all immediately agreed. When approached a few weeks later the home owners were asked to place the gigantic sign on their front lawn. This same group overwhelmingly agreed—76 percent consented—to having the unsightly sign in their front yards.
When we take a small step in one direction we are driven to maintain a sense of consistency by agreeing to larger requests. Simply, those who had agreed to the smaller request had reshaped their self-concept to include the definition that they were serious about driver safety. Therefore, agreeing to the larger request was just doing something for a cause that they already and firmly “believed” in. Effective fund-raisers know the number-one rule for raising money. The easiest person to get a donation from is someone who has given money before.
Quick Point: Music has an impact on the speed of our actions. Consider the study done by Milliman (1982), which showed that slow-paced music played in grocery stores increases sales because shoppers walk more slowly down the aisles. The flip side of this is also true. Fast-paced music furnishes an unconscious motivation for acting quickly. Roballey et al. (1985) found that if fast music is played while people eat, they respond with more bites per minute. If possible, have fast-tempo music playing in the background to increase the feeling and urgency for taking action. To increase the benefits of this law try speaking faster. You will notice that if you ask someone a question slowly, he will respond the same way, and vice versa. Others will be guided by your sense of urgency and speaking fast increases this feeling of necessity.
4. Expectation
The law of expectation states that people will do what you expect them to do. Speak and act directly, clearly, and confidently. Also, take the appropriate corresponding physical action. Whether it’s moving toward the door, picking up a pen, or dialing the phone, people will respond to your assuredness and act accordingly. In other words, you can use more than just words—use your actions as well—to spark action. If, for example, you want someone to follow you—literally—begin walking without looking back “to make sure he’s coming.” Your words and actions must convey confidence and expectation that the person will comply.
5. Processing Information
It is crucial to this process to know how people process information. The good news is that we all do it in the same way. In my book Never Be Lied to Again I talked about this concept and how it gives us a dramatic insight into human behavior. Remember above when we spoke about starting with something easy and simple to enact the law of inertia? Let’s take a look at another application of this process. When it comes to doing something that we like, we do what’s called single-tasking. When we think about things we don’t want to do, we do what’s called multitasking. What does this all mean? Well, if you have to pay your bills but never feel like doing it, what are the thought processes you might go through? You think, I’ve got to get all of the bills together and organize them into different piles; get out my checkbook, stamps, and envelopes; address each letter; write out the check; balance the checkbook; and so on. When it comes to doing something you enjoy doing, you internalize the steps in larger groups. For example, if you enjoy cooking, the steps might be, go to the store and come home and make dinner.
If you hated to cook, everything from waiting on line at the supermarket to cleaning the dishes afterward would enter into the equation. Fine, but what’s the practical use of this? Well, if you want someone to take immediate action, you’re going to show him that it’s simple and easy. If you want to discourage a behavior, you need only stretch out the number of steps into a long, boring, and arduous process. It’s the same event, but depending upon how it’s internalized, you’ll generate a completely different attitude toward it.
6. Additional Incentive
But wait...that’s not all! How many times have you heard this familiar phrase at the end of a commercial or late night infomercial? The “add-on” is a highly effective
tool for generating action whether on TV, in person, or on the phone. So use it. It’s estimated that the use of this technique increases the response rate from these programs by as much as 35 percent. It gives the person an extra benefit for acting, and the most fascinating thing is that it almost doesn’t matter what it is. Once you’ve presented your request by employing the tactics above, use an “add-on.” It can be any small additional benefit that the person gets for taking action now (i.e., “We can get ice cream”; “I’ll have a loaner car for you”; “We’ll go to dinner afterward,” etc.). You’ll be amazed at how efficient this psychological tool can be.
The language that you use can also invoke the law of inertia. Seemingly innocuous words such as: as, while, and during are such powerful motivators that they are often used in hypnosis. Remember that when a person is already in motion—either in thought or physically—it’s easier for him to continue. For example if you want compliance, you’re better off saying something such as, “While we’re out let’s go by Jim’s house, okay?” instead of, “When we go out, do you want to stop in and see Jim?” Do you see how easily the first sentence flows with the idea of seeing Jim?
Strategy Review
• Narrow a person’s options to avoid extensive deliberation. Fewer choices mean that he will make a decision faster and be less likely to dwell on it afterward.
• Give a deadline for taking action. A deadline restricts freedom and increases our desire to gain what is rare and becoming scarcer. This greatly motivates us to move forward and to take immediate action.
• Engage the law of consistency by first having an individual commit to a smaller request. When we take a small step in one direction we are driven to maintain a sense of consistency by agreeing to larger requests.
• Use your words and your actions to engage the law of expectation.
• Maximize the law of inertia by reducing what you want a person to do to simple, easy-to-follow steps to get him to begin moving in the right direction.
• Offer any small additional benefit for taking action now. This will significantly increase your chances of gaining compliance.
• Keep in mind that the number-one psychological rule that determines if someone will do something for you or even with you is that she must, to some extent, like you and, preferably, trust you. So glance at Chapter 1, Get Anyone to Like You...Every Time, in order to round out your psychological strategy for this section.
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14
Get Anyone to Take Your Advice
You’ve got a great idea but nobody is listening to you! This can be extremely frustrating but by following a specific psychological strategy you can virtually ensure that anyone will listen to what you have to say. The three main factors of influence here are (1) emotions, (2) strategy, and (3) consequences.
It’s been clearly established, through numerous studies, that you need to appeal to a person’s emotions in your attempt to persuade. No matter how rational and logical your argument is, if you do not arouse emotions you will have great difficulty influencing him.
Ninety percent of the decisions we make are based on emotion. We then use logic to justify our actions. If you appeal to someone on a strictly logical basis, you will have little chance of persuading him. You need to translate the facts into an emotion-based statement—and give clear and specific benefits that appeal to the person’s emotions.
Studies show that in addition to arousing strong emotions you will be especially effective when you offer a specific game plan with a clear-cut course of action for proceeding. When we are passionately motivated to take action and move forward, it is essential that we understand the direction and the method for proceeding. It makes us feel comfortable and secure knowing that the path is clearly lit and laid out. When you want someone to listen to your advice, provide more than just the desired destination; also give her a map for getting there.
It has been shown that if you add to this how your idea will prevent negative or unpleasant consequences you will be infinitely more successful in your attempt to persuade (Leventhal, Singer, and Jones, 1965). A well-known sweepstakes company used to have a slogan that said: You can be a winner. It did very well with this for a long time. But then, I’m sure after consulting a psychologist or two, its slogan changed to You may already be a winner. This greatly increased their success. Why? Because now the person receiving this envelope became fearful that he might lose something that he already had. Throw out an envelope that contains untold riches? No way! This was different than gaining something new, as the old slogan implied. Now he risked losing something. This is a much more powerful motivator. Therefore, focus on what he will be saving himself from (i.e., the heartache, money, energy, etc.) rather than what he has to gain from listening to you.
Four other psychological factors to consider
• People tend to respond more favorably to solutions if they believe the plan of action came from them. Try to remind someone that it was he who first had the idea or put you in the right direction, etc.
• Let him know too that this new way of thinking is really consistent with who he is. Remind him of other things he’s done that are consistent with this current belief or action. You may recall from a previous chapter that all human beings have an inherent need for order and consistency. If he views this as a continuation of his thinking and not a departure from it, you’ll increase your chances of getting compliance.
• Nobody wants to hear advice from a “know-it-all.” One of the very best ways of offering advice is to let the person know that you don’t believe you have all the answers. You’ll be perceived as infinitely more credible and sincere. A great way to phrase your advice is, “There are things I think I know, and there are things I know I know. And this is something that I know I know.”
• Above all, remember enthusiasm is contagious. The more excited and passionate you are about what you’re saying the more excited he will become about it.
Follow this strategy for sure-fire success, but before you do, let’s take a look at one of the biggest mistakes that people make when giving advice. This aspect of human nature is responsible for more “stubborn” thinking than anything else. Research in human behavior shows us that when we feel our freedom is being restricted or limited we tend to move farther toward what is being limited.
The name given to this is called reactance and it occurs when we feel that someone is trying to limit our freedom. And it can be so powerful that Rhodewalt and Davison (1983) found that people may do the opposite of what you are asking—just because of reactance.
In situations that are likely to generate reactance you will meet with great resistance if you promote a hard sell. No one will listen with an open mind to what you have to say, if he feels he’s being forced into it. And in fact, that makes sense. Why listen if you feel that your own wishes aren’t being considered? Therefore, the best approach is to let the person know ahead of time that he has the final say on what he ultimately does. Then lay out the facts, presenting both sides—the pros and the cons (you’ll see in another chapter why this is necessary) and follow the rest of the tactics in this section.
Strategy Review
• Ninety percent of the decisions we make are based on emotion. We then use logic to justify our actions. You must arouse emotions in your attempt to persuade.
• Offer a specific game plan with a clear-cut course of action for proceeding.
• Add to this how your idea will prevent negative or unpleasant consequences. This is more effective than explaining what someone will gain by listening to you.
• If true, remind him how he is in some way the one who first gave you the idea.
• Let him know too that this new way of thinking is really consistent with who he is. Relate the things he’s done that are consistent with this current belief or action.
• Don’t come across as a “know-it-all” and you’ll be perceived as more credible and sincere in this situation.
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p; • Remember that enthusiasm is contagious. If you’re not excited about the idea, he will not be excited about it either.
15
Get Anyone to Follow Through on a Commitment to You
http://getanyonetodoanything.us/vid00051.html
“But you promised!” If you’re tired of saying this, the following strategy will help to ensure that you’ll be able to get any person to follow through on anything that he’s promised to you.
The most effective psychological tool for getting someone to follow through is to let him know that you believe that he is the type of person who does follow through. Using phrases such as “You’re the kind of person who...”; “You’ve always impressed me with your ability to...”; or “I’ve always liked the fact that you...” invokes the powerful psychological law of internal consistency.
These phrases make the person feel compelled to follow through because you involve the ego and create a sense of desired consistency. People have an inherent need to perform in a manner consistent with how they see themselves and with how they think others perceive them. That’s why one of the biggest mistakes people make is saying things like, “Come on, please do it”; “I just knew this was going to be a problem”; “I just knew you weren’t going to do this”; or “I don’t know why I bothered to count on you.” This does not generate any psychological motivation to prove you wrong. These comments address someone’s actions not her identity and force her ego to come up with reasons to justify her behavior, not to change it!
Get Anyone to Do Anything Page 6
