by Lacey Reah
trash, the boat explosions, and more. In a flash she felt the river’s pain and saw what Vera had seen in him, something to look at that wasn’t horrible and tragic. In Vera he could hang onto some kind of innocence.
But it couldn’t last forever, Gina explained to the river spirit, remembering her lost love, the ghost who came from another dimension. You can’t love someone and think it will stop you from ever feeling pain. You can’t decide to become mortal and think you can forget what being human really means. To be human is to be in pain. Yes, there’s love and devotion and innocence, but there’s also heartache and wanting things you can’t have and losing things that can’t stay. To be mortal is to desire and crave. You take the things you love for granted when you finally have them and cry in anguish when you realize they’re gone. You can’t ignore that any more than you can ignore the fact that your home is right there in front of you and you can barely even look at it.
Gina knew about these things all too well. She had communicated with far too many spirits and tried to bridge the gap between their relationships with the living. She had felt, seen, and experienced heartache enough times to acknowledge it.
Ol’ Man River quivered as Gina ranted and raved until the river spirit finally raged out into the water, a great, powerful presence of sparkling light. In its wake, a wave of spray seemed to rise up to the moon, who finally took notice.
Good job, the voodoo spirit remarked in shock.
He had appeared worried by Gina’s dramatic approach, but she knew there was no other way to reach a great elemental spirit. She had to summon every feeling she had inside her just to do it.
She was rewarded by the presence of the royal moon spirit. The lunar embodiment seemed to have a face of pure light as she stood high into the night sky with great authority. Do you have something to say? Her silent words carried to Gina but were intended for someone else.
Ol’ Man River said, No, very loudly. However, Colin took no notice.
Then why did you bother to summon me? the great moon thought.
Show me Vera, Ol’ Man River demanded.
She belongs to me now.
You’ve trapped her?
No, of course not! I do not trap spirits. She came here for you, because you wouldn’t. She’s doing your job, though she could be better at it, I think. But alas, she’s just a human.
Between the moon and the river, Gina could sense the courageous spirit of a woman who loved the river. Of course she would do whatever it took to keep it flowing with the tides. She’s not a prisoner, Gina explained to the river spirit. She’s just really busy. It’s a lot of work for a human soul to constantly dance with the moon and balance those forces.
Ol’ Man River quivered in place between the water and the spirit’s human shell, Colin. He knew what he had to do, but he was frightened. It wasn’t all in vain, Gina cajoled. You loved her, I know. But you can’t deny who you are or who she is. You can’t ignore the whole picture just so you can look at the one thing you want to see.
Suddenly, something jolted Gina out of her usual trance with the spirit world. She felt the touch of real flesh and blood. It was Colin. He had reached over and given her a long, sensual hug. Thank you, she thought she heard the river spirit say, though Colin said nothing. He looked content, like all had been said, but he lingered against her. Before she could react, she felt the warm sensation of tangible lips on hers—her first human kiss. It was sweet, soft, and grateful. Then, just as easily as he held her there, he let her go and threw himself into the river.
Gina ran to the railing, knowing there was nothing she could do. Colin was where he wanted to be. She watched as he waved to her and disappeared. Well done, the voodoo spirit whispered, but she brushed him off and ran home. She didn’t know why she felt so upset. She spent what was left of her night listening to old tunes, eating ice cream, and finally crying herself to sleep.
When she woke up, she felt as if a train had hit her. She listened to the messages on her phone asking her to talk to the ghosts of haunted houses or to the relatives of sad humans who had passed on. She ignored them and sulked for a few more hours before finally picking herself up. She took a shower and plodded over to the corner flower shop where she felt compelled to buy a dozen roses.
She took the streetcar back to the waterfront and saw him there, Ol’ Man River, doing his dance with the moon. It seemed the waterfront attracted more people that day, including a blues musician who played a song on his guitar, dedicated to the Mississippi.
Gina put the roses on the edge of the railing, a message in any dimension, and felt Vera thanking her. The woman’s spirit seemed glad to have the river back, and there was a strange peace in the forces of nature, at least for the time being.
Gina looked up at the moon and felt her radiance. It occurred to her that the grass, the trees, and the birds also had a soul of their own. Even the rocks and dirt had a spirit. Gina could feel their presence, their peace, and their anguish when the balance of nature was tipped. She could also choose to ignore them, except that she was lonely. Even with the company of her spirit friends, she still felt alone. Well, she thought, it’s all part of being human, isn’t it? At least that’s what she told the river spirit.
No, she realized. They were all in it together, and they were all moving in a dance with nature. With that knowledge, she grasped that sometimes it was when she felt the most alone that she felt the most connected to everyone and everything.
