“Well, I am.” He plucked his shirt. “I’m also sorry I’m so dirty and sweaty, but appearances were the last thing on my mind. Still, I have some money in my pocket, so let’s go get something to eat.”
Jane walked with Levy to the air-conditioned restaurant and slid into a booth with a sigh. “I’m still beating myself up.”
“That makes two of us.” Levy removed his straw hat and placed it beside him on the booth seat. “I keep wondering...” He trailed off.
“Wondering what?”
“Wondering if I’m cut out to be a father.”
“No one is cut out to be a father—or a mother—when it first happens.”
“Then how do people do it?”
“They learn on the job, how else? The only difference between you and other people is you didn’t have nine months to mentally prepare yourself like most dads do.”
“True.” He stared at the cutlery on the table. “This made me realize how much Mercy has come to mean to me. I’ve grown to love her so much. I suppose that’s another thing new dads do.”
“Of course.” Jane closed her eyes for a moment. “I’m the same. She’s such a lovable baby. Despite the oddness of how she arrived, it’s like she was meant to be here.”
When she opened her eyes, she saw Levy watching her. “That’s something I hadn’t thought of,” he admitted.
“What’s that?”
“That you—as the nanny—might fall in love with Mercy.”
“I’ve taken care of a lot of babies over the years, but never as a full-time job. It’s an occupational hazard I didn’t anticipate.”
“Then how will you—” He was interrupted by the waitress, who came to take their order. After she departed, Levy continued, “How will you handle it when it comes time for you to leave this job?”
“I don’t know.” Pain stabbed her in the heart at the thought of leaving Mercy...and Levy. “I haven’t thought that far ahead. Falling in love with Mercy wasn’t what I’d planned.”
Levy sighed. “Life certainly has a way of becoming complicated. I’m a simple man. I prefer a simple life. I didn’t anticipate something like this.”
“It’s been a stressful day,” she acknowledged. “And depending on how long the tests may take, I think I’ll spend the night here. You’ve got work to do on the farm, including milking the cows. I’m the logical person to stay with her.”
He nodded. “I won’t argue. I’m grateful, Jane. I don’t know how I’d do this without you.”
When the food was delivered, Jane bowed her head and prayed for Mercy’s health. Then she unfolded her napkin and glanced around the restaurant. “I wonder how many people here have friends or relatives in the hospital.”
“I don’t like hospitals.” Levy bit into his hamburger. “They remind me of when my parents were killed.”
She couldn’t imagine the pain Levy must have been through in his life. No wonder he was so adamant about keeping Mercy despite all the difficulties involved.
She looked at him, sitting across the table from her. He was not pleasing to the eye at the moment. His face was streaked with grime from the day’s work, his shirt was filthy, his hair plastered to his head from the shape of the straw hat.
Yet he had strength and maturity in his face, a sense of purpose and determination. The burdens and responsibilities he took on in his life, he took very seriously.
She compared him to Isaac, and realized with a sense of shock that, next to Levy, Isaac was still a boy, at least in her memory. Levy was a man. And despite the dirty clothes and face, he was a handsome man.
She sighed as she took a bite of her own food. The last thing she needed was to start thinking about her boss in that way. She had enough on her plate right now—and so did Levy.
When they returned to the hospital, Mercy was still undergoing tests and the receptionist instructed them to be seated. An hour passed, then two. Finally a doctor emerged from the swinging double doors. “Mr. Struder?”
Levy bounced to his feet. “Ja?”
Jane rose too.
“I’m Dr. Forster.” He shook hands with Levy, then Jane. “I want to let you know the baby is stabilized. We have her on an antibiotic IV drip and we’ve managed to control her fever. The good news is we’ve ruled out meningitis, which was the most serious threat.”
“Thank Gott,” whispered Levy, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Do you know what caused the fever?” asked Jane.
“Are you the mother?”
“No, I’m the nanny.”
“The baby’s mother is my sister,” explained Levy. “She is...well, I don’t know where she is. A few weeks ago she sent the baby to me to raise. I hired Jane to care for her.”
The doctor nodded. “That helps us decide a couple of things. I’ll be honest, Mr. Struder. The baby may have a condition she picked up from her mother during the birth itself. Since we don’t know your sister’s prenatal health, we have to make sure the baby didn’t pick up a pathogen of some sort. This can mean mild symptoms for the mother, but much more serious implications for a baby.”
Levy paled. “How serious?”
“Try not to worry.” The doctor held up a hand. “Much of what we’re doing is ruling out what she doesn’t have. But because newborns with high fevers can be at risk, we tend to be pretty aggressive in our evaluation and treatment. So far we’ve ruled out meningitis and pneumonia, but some of the tests require lab cultures, and those take time. This is why I recommend we keep her here in the hospital until we get the test results back, which won’t be until tomorrow, or the next day at the latest.”
“I’ve already told Levy I’ll stay with the baby,” Jane told him. “He has farm animals to take care of.”
“That’s fine. We can provide a bed for you in the baby’s room. Since the baby is familiar with you, she’ll be calmer under your care anyway.”
Levy looked at Jane. “I’ll have to figure out some way to get home...”
“How did you get here?” inquired Dr. Forster. “Did you use a horse and buggy?”
“No, an Englisch friend drove us in.”
“I can call a car to bring you home,” offered the doctor.
“Thank you, I would appreciate that.”
After the physician left to make arrangements, Levy dropped into a chair. “I’m trying not to think how much this will cost,” he muttered.
Though medical costs were often shared by the community, Jane understood the reluctance to add to anyone’s financial burden. “It’s better to have a healthy baby,” she told him. “It sounds like it could have been very, very serious if we hadn’t brought her in.”
“Ja, you’re right. And Gott will provide us the way to pay for everything. But it also means I’ll need to work harder at the farmer’s market.” He quirked a grim smile at her. “Those pints of raspberry jam will be very welcome in the booth.”
“Well, I won’t take any money for the ones that sell.” Jane dropped down into the chair next to him. “It will all go toward the hospital costs.”
He didn’t argue.
A nurse emerged. “Mr. Struder, a car will be here in a few minutes to bring you home.”
“Can I see Mercy?”
“Of course. But don’t be alarmed by her appearance.”
Jane’s stomach clenched as she and Levy followed the nurse into the bowels of the hospital.
Stepping into Mercy’s room, they saw her lying in a crib. Wires connected her to monitors. She was sleeping.
“She’s tired out from the tests,” said the nurse. “Sleeping is the best thing she can do right now. It’ll help her heal.”
“I hate seeing her here,” Jane confessed.
“But she’s improving. Unless she takes a turn for the worse, and we don’t expect that to happen, we’ll keep her on antibiotics
for another twenty-four hours or so. By then we’ll have some of the lab results back. If things look positive, we can release her while we wait for the rest of the cultures to come back.” The nurse smiled. “I expect you’ll be able to bring her home twenty-four hours from now, though she’ll need some follow-up visits.”
Levy nodded and Jane saw him swallow. “It scares me to think what might have happened if we hadn’t brought her in.”
“Older babies can spike a fever of unknown origin, and while it’s a little scary for the parents, it generally passes without a problem,” said the nurse. “But in newborns, fevers can be life-threatening. We may not find out what caused it, but the critical thing is to either treat—or rule out—the very serious illnesses.”
Levy reached out and gently cupped Mercy’s head with his hand, and Jane saw his lips move in prayer. Then he stepped back. “I’d best get home. I have a lot of work to do.” He looked at Jane. “I’ll come back with the buggy tomorrow afternoon.”
“Ja.” She watched as he turned and made his way out of the hospital room. “He’s so worried,” she murmured.
The nurse heard. “He’s the uncle, right?”
“Ja. And part of his worry stems from not knowing where his sister is, the baby’s mother.”
The nurse’s expression was sympathetic. “He seems like a good man.”
“Ja, he is.”
The nurse grew brisk. “I’m assuming you don’t have a change of clothes, but we can give you a hospital gown to sleep in for the night, if you like. We also have a small library if you’d like something to read while you’re here.”
“Thank you.”
The nurse showed Jane where the bookshelves were located, then departed for her duties. Jane chose a few books as well as a Bible, then returned to Mercy’s room.
It seemed very strange to sit in a chair beside the baby’s crib, confined to a cheerful but serious hospital room full of unknown equipment.
With some relief, she heard Mercy stir and whimper, then the whimper turned into a thin fretful cry. A different nurse came hurrying in.
Jane felt helpless. “Is she okay?”
“Seems so.” The nurse read various monitors over the crib. “Yes, I think she’s just hungry. And wet.”
“Can I change her? And feed her?”
“Of course. Holding her is about the best thing you can do right now, though you’ll have to be careful of her IV tube and the wire connections.”
The nurse provided a tiny disposable diaper, which Jane—used to cloth diapers—managed to fit onto the baby. The nurse showed her how to avoid tangling with the tubes and wires while she picked Mercy up and cradled her.
She sank down into the room’s comfortable glider rocking chair while the nurse prepared a bottle of formula. Mercy was fretful until Jane slipped the tip into the baby’s mouth. Immediately she started sucking.
“Ah, that’s a good sign. She has an appetite,” said the nurse. “Hold her as long as you like. She’ll enjoy the body contact. I’ll check up on you in a few minutes.”
Jane leaned back, watching the infant’s face as she nursed. Mercy’s eyes stayed closed, and she seemed tired, but there was no question she was hungry. She nearly finished the bottle.
Jane flipped a hospital towel over her shoulder and lifted Mercy onto her shoulder, careful not to touch the IV tube and monitor wires, and patted her back until she burped. Then Jane slid Mercy down onto her chest and rocked as the baby relaxed into sleep.
Slow tears trickled down Jane’s face as she realized how much Mercy had come to mean to her. She blessed her Aunt Catherine for encouraging them to take the baby to the hospital right away. What would have happened if she had kept her home, only to have her take a turn for the worse?
Now thanks be to Gott, this precious, vulnerable bundle was still alive and resting against her chest. Jane didn’t want to let her go.
Exhausted, she dozed until the nurse came in. “Everything all right?”
Jane blinked. “Ja. She fell right asleep after her bottle. Should she go back to her crib or can I keep holding her?”
“Oh, hold her, by all means. Babies do best when they’re held and loved.” The nurse moved about the room, taking notes, straightening some items. “Can I bring you some dinner?”
“No, thank you, I already ate.”
“Some tea, perhaps?”
“Oh, thank you. That would be wonderful.”
So the nurse brought Jane a paper cup of steaming water and a little basket filled with tea bags and sugar packets, which she placed on a small sturdy table near the rocking chair. She helped prepare the tea, since Jane was unable to use both hands to make the tea herself. Then she brought the small pile of books Jane had borrowed and set them on the table as well.
“You look like you’ve done this before,” Jane said, smiling.
“Yes, we often have parents staying with their sick babies. They usually don’t want to do anything but hold them.”
Jane rested her hand on Mercy’s back. “I can understand why.”
“But she’s not your baby? You’re the nanny?”
“Ja, but it’s not hard to fall in love with something this precious.”
The nurse smiled. “This baby is in good hands.”
Left alone, Jane sipped her tea and managed to thumb open one of the books. Mercy breathed easily, and the horrible fever heat had left her body.
The words of the book blurred as Jane’s thoughts wandered. It was true what she’d just admitted to the nurse: she had fallen in love with Mercy. She supposed it would be hard not to love the vulnerable motherless infant with such a sweet disposition.
Back in Jasper, as her friends started to get married and have families, Jane felt left behind. Her Gott-given gift to soothe babies had been appreciated by her friends whenever they’d needed an extra pair of hands, but Jane had never fallen in love with the babies she’d cared for. She’d never experienced motherly love and, after Isaac married Hannah, she wondered if she ever would.
Until now.
A slow tear leaked out of the corner of her eye. This baby wasn’t hers. It wasn’t even Levy’s. It was Eliza’s. If the mysteriously absent sister ever decided to return to Grand Creek, wouldn’t she want her baby back?
Levy was another difficulty. Despite his prickly personality and touchiness over how he’d raised his sister, he was a good man...a fact not lost on Jane. She’d seen him at his worst, and his worst wasn’t bad. She was trying hard not to fall in love with him. Levy saw her as a useful person, just as Isaac did. Not as a potential wife. Falling in love with him would be as painful as losing Isaac.
It seemed her new life here in Grand Creek was turning out to be just as complicated as her life in Jasper.
Chapter Ten
Jane ended up holding Mercy in her arms most of the night, dozing in the rocking chair and keeping the baby snuggled against her chest. A nurse came in every couple of hours to check on Mercy and examine the IV. She seemed pleased at the baby’s progress. Jane changed the infant’s diaper once and fed her twice during the night.
“A healthy appetite is a good sign,” the night nurse assured her when she came in during her rounds and saw Jane feeding Mercy. “She looks like she’s progressing well.”
As the sun rose over the cars in the parking lot outside the hospital window, Jane laid the sleeping baby in her crib and stretched her cramped muscles. Heavy-eyed, she stumbled into the bathroom, removed her kapp, splashed water on her face, tidied her hair and made herself neat. Looking in the mirror, she winced at the dark circles under her eyes.
By the time the doctor came in on his morning rounds, Mercy was awake and quiet.
“Let’s see how she’s doing. She looks better,” said Dr. Forster. He went to the baby in the crib and did a brief exam while Jane watched. The physician took Mercy’s temp
erature, listened to her lungs, examined her eyes and mouth, and smiled.
“She’s a fighter, this kid,” he told the hovering Jane. “I think we can take her IV tube out, but I’d like to keep her on the monitors. We’ll get some of the lab results back today, which will give us some indication what may have caused the fever. But if she continues improving and shows no more signs of fever throughout the day, I see no problem with discharging her this afternoon.”
“That’s a relief. I’ve been so worried.” She closed her eyes and whispered a prayer of thanksgiving.
“You look like you were up all night with her.” The doctor eyed her.
“Ja, I just dozed in the rocking chair but held her all night.”
He smiled. “I wouldn’t be surprised if that contributed to Mercy’s improvement. Many people underestimate the importance of holding a baby as a factor in their healthy development. I see a lot of mothers who put their babies in cribs or strollers or playpens, but seldom hold them. Physical contact is especially important for babies who are bottle-fed.”
“I use this a lot too.” Jane rummaged in the diaper bag and plucked out the sling. “I can carry her around while doing chores.”
“Excellent.” Dr. Forster glanced at his watch. “You’re probably in for a boring day until Mercy is discharged this afternoon.”
“I have books to read.” Jane gestured toward the pile. “Do you have many Amish patients?”
“Of course. Since I’m a pediatrician, I treat many farm kids for injuries or illnesses.” He smiled and then left Mercy’s room to continue his rounds.
As predicted, it was indeed a boring day for Jane. Hours later, Dr. Forster came back, holding a file, just as the nurse poked her head in the door. “Dr. Forster? Mr. Struder is here, the baby’s uncle. Did you want to talk to him?”
“Yes, can you bring him in?”
The nurse disappeared and reappeared a few minutes later with Levy. He was much cleaner than yesterday and wore a fresh shirt, though he also had circles under his eyes. Jane’s heart jumped when he walked in.
Dr. Forster shook his hand. “Did you have a bad night’s sleep?” he quipped.
Amish Baby Lessons Page 11
