by H. L. Burke
“Nice try, kid.” His fist rocketed forward, slamming into Jake’s gut.
Jake wheezed as every ounce of air escaped his body. He crumpled. The baton slipped from his grasp and rolled across the floor.
Carter raised a booted foot over Jake’s head.
A figure exploded through the door behind Carter, and he crashed into the wall on the other side of the unit.
“Don’t touch him!” a surprisingly familiar voice snarled.
Fade?
Carter lurched to his feet, teeth bared. “Who’s gonna stop me?”
Jake scooted out of the way as Carter charged Fade like a bull seeing red. His fists cut through the DOSA hero as if he’d been vapor, but Carter didn’t stop raining down blows.
Jake desperately searched the unit for anything that could help. There! The stun baton. He snatched it up.
“Fade, catch!” He hurled it across the room.
Fade caught it mid-air then jabbed forward, towards Carter’s stomach. Rather than impact, the baton impaled, pushed into his body by Fade’s powers. Fade released it. Carter’s eyes went wide. He grasped at the suddenly solid again baton extending from his gut, whimpered, then toppled to the floor.
Jake collapsed, his whole body shaking uncontrollably. His mind flailed for an anchor. His uncle’s voice echoed through his brain, taunting him.
You’re nothing without the gang. Loyalty is everything. Without it, we’re nothing, any of us, but especially you.
All his life he’d believed that, believed in his destiny as a part of the whole the Sand Foxes provided. It was something to fight for, something to depend on, something to belong to.
But now the family had cut that anchor from him in the cruelest way. Now he had no one, and what did that make him? Nothing.
Not worth the risk. Safer for them to cut their losses. Not worth the risk ...
Fade crouched beside him, his grip like iron on Jake’s shoulder. “Are you hurt?” he asked, his voice tense.
Jake managed to shake his head before a sob wracked him. Shame flooded his chest.
So weak. So useless. No wonder they didn’t want me. No wonder I wasn’t worth the risk.
“Easy. Deep breaths. It’s okay,” Fade soothed. “Let’s get you—”
“Nobody wants me!” The words escaped from Jake in a wail.
Fade recoiled, dark eyes widening.
Jake jerked away from Fade and covered his eyes with his hand. “I gave everything to the gang. I never would’ve ratted them out. Not in a million ... I wouldn’t. They didn’t have to ... why?”
“Because they’re criminals, Jake.” Fade’s voice hardened. “Criminals don’t value life. While you were useful to them, they used you, but they didn’t value you. They don’t value anything that doesn’t immediately advance their business.”
“But they’re my family—” Jake struggled to hold onto it, to believe it again, but it fought him like a drenched cat, angry and uncontainable.
“Men like Vic Lucas don’t have family. They have victims and they have accomplices and not much else in between.” Fade nodded towards the exit. “We need to get out of here. The Sand Foxes might have other agents in the area. We need to get back to the safe house.”
“It doesn’t matter.” Jake kicked at the floor. “I’m screwed wherever I go. DOSA’s just playing me until I break and testify against the gang, and I’m not ... I’m not gonna.” He crossed his arms over his chest, mostly to steady his still trembling hands. “I’m not a rat. I don’t care what Uncle Vic is, but I’m not ...”
I’m nothing. I have nothing and no one and I am nothing.
His vision blurred.
“I’m not going to pretend DOSA hasn’t been pushing you to do that, but whether you do or not, you still have a place at the camp.” Fade took a step towards him.
“For now!” Jake’s throat closed in on itself. “I’m not going to last. I can’t cut it. I don’t belong here, Fade. I’m not like Princess Laleh or Marco or you—I don’t have what it takes to be a hero, and apparently I’ve failed as a villain. I ... I’m ...”
Worthless. A failure. Unwanted.
“Whatever I am doesn’t matter because no one wants it.” He hung his head.
“Prism and I—”
“I’m your job.” Jake forced a derisive snort. Even if Prism had believed in him, he’d given her all the proof she’d need to see that he wasn’t hero material. Lying, sneaking away, consorting with criminals. Even she would have to give up on him after this. Fade, with his natural skepticism and knowledge of the villain world, had to see it already. “You can’t fix me. I’m not workable. Stop pretending you can make a hero out of me. It’s ... dumb.” He ended lamely. Only Fade’s presence kept him from rushing out the door. Maybe he could make it on his own. He had powers. He knew how to take care of himself. If he could stay a step ahead of whoever the family sent next, as well as DOSA, maybe—
“You have a good heart and a strong spine.” The words barely reached Jake’s ears, so quiet he thought he might’ve imagined them.
He frowned at Fade. “What?”
Fade let out a breath. “You’re wrong, Jake. Not about Laleh and Marco. You’re not like them, and you’ll never be. You’re not like Prism or most other sables I’ve met either ... but me? Yeah, you are.” He placed one hand on each of Jake’s shoulders. “Twenty years ago, I was just as messed up as you are now, just as alone, just as unwanted. I believed with every fiber of my being I had nothing to offer the world but my skills as a thief. I believed I’d never have a place, never have people. But you know what? I was wrong. It took someone telling me that over and over again before I believed it, and maybe it’s my turn to do the same for you.”
Jake squirmed, his gaze darting for the door.
“Look at me,” Fade said, his voice firm.
Jake’s eyes cut unbidden back to the older man’s.
“You have a good heart and a strong spine. Whatever else you are, whatever else you’re lacking or think you’re lacking, if you have those two traits, you can make it as a hero, and you’re wrong about another thing. Job or not, whether you testify or not, I do want you and I’m going to do whatever it takes to keep you safe and keep you on the right path. Not because it’s my job but because I care about you. Doubt yourself. Doubt the system. Doubt whatever you want, but don’t doubt that. Never doubt that.”
Jake’s hands shook. He fought for words, fought for reasons why Fade was wrong, but an overwhelming need to be wanted grabbed him about the throat and wouldn’t let go. Unable to hold back anymore, he broke down, weeping, as Fade pulled him into an embrace, pressing Jake’s head against his shoulder. No pride left, Jake returned the hug, sinking into the heartache radiating through him rather than fighting it.
“Come on,” Fade said. “Let’s get you home, all right?”
Jake pulled away. His eyes adjusted to the darkness, and he found himself staring at Carter’s body. “He was supposed to text my uncle when he was done with me. What if they send someone else?”
Fade flipped on the flashlight feature of his cell phone and searched Carter’s body. He found a phone and pressed Carter’s finger against the fingerprint sensor. It unlocked. He spent a moment texting then glanced up. “Okay, I just told your uncle the job is complete. I’m calling in a DOSA clean up team. As much as I’d like them to stay out of this, we’ll probably need their help.” He let out a breath. “We’re going to have to fake your death, kid.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jake’s head ached as he limped up to the door of the DOSA safe house. Several black SUV’s were parked in front of the residence—not the most inconspicuous way of handling things, but that was DOSA for you.
Fade set his hand on Jake’s shoulder. “Get inside and get some rest. We’ll take care of everything else, okay?”
Jake managed a weak nod before he stumbled up to the front step. The door popped open, and Laleh stared out at him. She whimpered then leapt forward, her
arms circling his neck.
“You’re okay? You’re not hurt? You’re okay?”
He squeezed her back. “Yeah. I’m okay. Thanks to Fade—I ... I didn’t get the money though.” He glanced past her to where Marco stood, Prism right behind him.
“It doesn’t matter.” Laleh’s hold on him tightened.
“She’s right.” Prism stepped forward. “Laleh told me about your blackmailer. Based on where she said his camp was, the man was squatting. That land belongs to the camp. He had no right to be there in the first place, so any possessions he lost were his own doing. I’ve already called up to the Deschutes county police. They’re going to make sure he’s cleared out before we return.”
Jake’s face heated. So he’d dragged himself and his friends into this mess for nothing.
He released Laleh and faced Prism. She stared tearfully into his eyes, and shame overwhelmed him.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“Next time you have a problem that big, come to me,” she said, her voice cracking. “I would never let you face something like that on your own, Jake. You’re ... you’re my responsibility.”
Weak-kneed, Jake accepted her embrace. “I’m sorry,” he said again. “I really am.”
A car horn honked, and Laleh’s nose wrinkled. “That’s my mom. Prism wants me and Marco to stay with her until this all cools down.”
Marco stepped closer. “Are you going to be okay by yourself?”
“Yeah.” Jake swallowed. He didn’t want to say goodbye to his friends right now, even temporarily. What if Laleh’s mom wouldn’t let her come back to camp because of what an idiot he’d been?
Prism squeezed his shoulder. “It’s all temporary. We’ll get back to Oregon and everything will be all right. I promise.”
He smiled weakly but couldn’t bring himself to watch as Marco and Laleh walked towards the waiting SUV.
“Come on. Let’s get you inside.” Prism took his hand and led him into the living room. Several pillows and a stack of blankets had been piled on the couch. She waited for him to sit. “If you’d rather go to bed, that’s fine too, but I suspected you might be a little too wound up after everything that happened.”
He winced. Understatement of the year. He collapsed onto the couch.
She sat next to him and reached for the remote. “Fade and I will handle DOSA, but I thought in the meantime, well ...” She clicked play and the Star Wars preamble began to crawl across the screen. “You need to make sure Han Solo comes out of this all right, don’t you?”
A soft feeling settled over Jake. “Yeah, that’s perfect.” Resting his head on one of the pillows, Jake fell into the world of Return of the Jedi, pushing aside real life with its trials and betrayals for just a little longer.
By the time the Ewoks celebrated their victory, he was fast asleep.
FADE STOOD IN THE ENTRANCE to the safe house’s living room. The light of early morning filtered over the space, silent except for the songs of birds in the bushes outside. Jake had fallen asleep on the couch, still in his clothes, a blanket over his body hiding him from the world.
Cyra Ashe had agreed to let both Marco and Laleh stay with her until they were certain that the Sand Foxes weren’t sending anyone else after Jake. DOSA had ordered plain-clothes patrols in the area around the safe house. Fade had taken the extra precaution of reaching out to Cody to keep an eye on the Sand Foxes’s digital communications. It all should’ve made him feel safer, but he didn’t think he could really rest until they were back in the relative seclusion of the camp.
So much for San Diego being safer.
At least the other two teens were secure with Cyra Ashe. She’d even promised to make sure Marco made his appointment with his mom. That would do the kid some good.
Soft footsteps padded towards him before Prism entered the room. She cast him a weary smile before coming to his side, her focus also on the sleeping Jake.
“Ruby’s finally asleep,” she murmured.
A knot formed in Fade’s stomach. “Are you sure you two don’t want to bunk with the Ashes tonight? Or another safe house?”
“It’s fine.” She placed her hand on his upper arm. “While I know better than to trust DOSA in everything, securing a safe house is well within their abilities. Also, it may not be logical, but I just have this feeling that our family needs to be together right now.”
“Yeah.” In spite of the current calm, anxiety roiled in Fade’s chest like a rising storm. He tried to push it off, label it paranoia in the face of potential danger, but it wasn’t an attack he feared. Something else was going on, something he was terrified to put a name to, something he’d felt before in different circumstances, but couldn’t reconcile with the current one.
Hearing that Jake was in danger had sent a jolt through his system, but somehow the aftermath, seeing the boy broken in heart and spirit, believing himself to be alone, had been worse. The overwhelming need to never see Jake in that state again, to never let him feel that again, had him in a headlock. He couldn’t shake it, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t return to the previous norm where Jake had just been one of his charges, a responsibility for sure, but not ... more. He wasn’t sure where it had happened, but somehow along the way, Jake had become more.
“Fade?” The quiver in Prism’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and he turned towards her.
He glanced down at her and recoiled. Tears glistened in the morning light dancing across her face.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” He pulled her into a hug. Sensing she wanted to talk, he drew her out of the room and into the hallway beyond, so they wouldn’t risk waking Jake.
She rested her head against his chest, drawing deep breaths, before she spoke again. “I’m worried this is going to come across as a stupid, emotional reaction to what happened today, but I swear I’ve been thinking about it for a long time, and today just sort of hammered it home. Still, I know we joked about me getting too attached—”
Fade’s heart rate quickened. Could she possibly be on the same page as him? How?
“And I know they aren’t mine. Marco and Laleh have their families, and there will be other kids who will come and go from our lives. I understand that. It’s what I signed up for, even knowing the goodbyes would hurt, but this is different. Jake—” She raised her eyes to his, her bottom lip quivering. “Jake is ours, Fade. He has to be. We can’t let him go.”
His hold on her strengthened instinctively. “Luce—”
“Before you argue, I know this isn’t going to be easy. DOSA’s got their claws in him, and the Sand Foxes aren’t going to quit, so we’ll need to take a lot of precautions—”
A smile quirked the corners of his mouth. “A few.”
“And maybe I’m being naive to think he will even want to be part of our family, but ... but Fade, what I’m feeling right now is so strong, even if I know it will sound weird if I try to explain it.”
He cupped her face in his hands. “Try.”
She closed her eyes and let out a gentle sigh. “It’s ... it’s like I’ve fallen in love. Do you remember that moment when we first saw Ruby? That overwhelming sensation that we’d do anything for her? You’re caught and you’re hooked, but you don’t care because your heart has broken open and let this new tiny person into your life, and that’s all that matters?”
Fade’s chest ached, but in a good way. “Yeah, I remember.”
“This is the same but different. With Ruby it was like love at first sight, an overwhelming rush that sealed the deal immediately. With Jake, it’s been more like how I fell in love with you, getting to know him over the last few months, having him grow into my heart until one day I realized I didn’t want to ever let him go, that I’d die for that poor, messed up kid, but more than that, I want to share things with him, life and hope and truth and the chance to really live.” She ran her hands up Fade’s shoulders and onto his neck. “We’re a team, though. I’m not asking you to accept what I’m saying right now, but if
you could give it some thought and prayer—”
“I already have.” He leaned into her, resting his forehead against hers. “You’re right, Luce. He’s ours. I ... I was actually trying to figure out how to tell you.”
Her eyes widened, but delight danced within them. “You were?”
“Yeah.” He kissed her. “I’m not sure of the next steps, but the goals? I’m with you. I want that too, and if we can convince Jake to let us love him—he’s ours. He has to be.”
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Jake stood at the kitchen sink, scrubbing at the residue on a frying pan. The scraps of eggs didn’t want to come off for anything.
“You’re taking forever.” Laleh whipped her dishtowel at him, but he accessed his powers, and it went right through him.
“Because I’m doing a good job.” He held up the pan to show her. “You want to switch jobs? I’d much rather dry than wash.”
“Nice try. It’s your turn,” she said.
“K, then shut up and let me finish.” He flipped the sponge to the scratchy side and washed harder.
Marco burst into the kitchen. “Look, guys!” He triumphantly exhibited a basket full of eggs. “They’re really laying now! I think this is the most we’ve ever gotten.”
Laleh gagged. “Eww, is that poop on that one?”
Marco peered into the basket. “Yeah, but it’s just on the shell. It’s not like it got inside.”
“Still gross.” She shook her head.
Jake laughed. It had been almost a month since their ill-fated trip to San Diego. At first, he’d worried that DOSA might use his screw ups to shut down the camp, but somehow Prism had spun it to convince them that this made her work even more necessary. He wasn’t sure how she’d managed that. Even more miraculously, Laleh’s mom hadn’t pulled her out of the program—something that surprisingly relieved Jake. As irritating as the girl had been initially, she was part of his family now, and he couldn’t imagine life at camp without her.
