I casually walked, feeling in my pants pocket, just to make sure that I had the weapon that was specially made for this moment. My palms had been itching to kill this nigga since the very first day that I saw his bitch ass come in. I learned from the OG’s back in the day that if you ever planned to do a nigga dirty, to make your move in silence. I didn’t give Dino any reason to feel like I was going to harm him. I simply ignored him, but if he was smart, he would have feared my silence because that only meant that I was plotting something, and I was up to no good.
I made it to the kitchen area and found him with the mop in his hands, cleaning the floors. His back was toward me, but I didn’t want to just run up on the nigga from behind. I wanted him to actually look me in my eyes as he took his last breath. He must have been able to feel my presence because he eventually turned around. Damn near thirty seconds went by, and neither of us said anything to each other. I couldn’t believe that a nigga who I literally grew up with was going to be added to my list of bodies. We had robbed together, came up with our gang together, fucked some pretty ass bitches together, and then it all had to come down to this. Wow!
“What you in here for?” I asked him.
I could see the huge lump in his throat that he’d swallowed. I also peeped the way his big ass started sweating.
“Shit, assault! I would have made bail, but I had a warrant out for my arrest that I didn’t even know about. Them crackas talking about my fingerprints matched those that were found at a robbery that took place a few months ago,” he said, talking all nonchalantly, although I knew his ass was shaking in his fuckin’ boots.
Dino knew that I didn’t have anything to lose. I wasn’t getting out of this bitch ever, so a man like me should be feared.
“Oh yeah? Who you assaulted?” I asked him, as if I didn’t know.
“Come on, Trip. Why you doing this shit?” he asked.
“Fuck am I doing? I’m just asking a fuckin’ question. I want to know who you assaulted because word on the streets is that you put your hands on my baby mama. I know you not foolish enough to do that. Tell me these niggas lying on you, so I don’t have to do you dirty in here,” I said.
He didn’t respond. A whole fuckin’ minute had passed, and still… nothing!
“Trip, it wasn’t even supposed to go down like that. She started talking crazy, and I just snapped. You know I would never do that to Shae. She’s like a sister… and… anddd… come on, man.” He started crying and begging for his life as I got closer to him.
It’s like I blacked the fuck out. I grabbed the shank that was in my pocket, and I just started jamming it in just about every part of his fuckin’ body. I didn’t stop until I felt his body stop moving. Blood was leaking out of him something serious. I could hear Raynell off in the background, telling me to stop and that was enough, and that’s when I was able to come back to my senses and let his body drop to the floor. I felt nothing as I stood there and watched an old best friend of mine just lay there and die.
“Give it to me. I’ll get rid of it,” Raynell said, referring to the shank that I was still holding.
I quickly passed it to her, and like nothing happened, she walked behind me, escorting me back to my cell. I felt relieved. It wouldn’t change the shit that happened, but it proved the love that I had for Shae. I wasn’t the best nigga in the world, but I actually did love that fuckin’ woman. I had risked so much shit by committing that murder in the kitchen area, but it was worth it to me.
Raynell used her keys to let me into my cell.
“We make a good team, shorty,” I let her know.
“What were you talking about earlier? This dangerous thing that you had in mind?” she questioned.
“I’m thinking about escaping. Me and you. Let’s get far away from this bitch. I don’t have all the details right now because I just started thinking about it a couple of weeks ago,” I let her know in all seriousness, and then she burst out laughing.
“Nigga, are you serious? Who the hell do you think you are? They will kill your ass before you even get off the premises. Go to sleep, Giovonni, because you’re talking crazy,” she whispered.
“I know what’s at risk, Raynell. That’s why this shit is going to take a lot of thought. Please, don’t knock it yet. When me and you first started fuckin’ around, didn’t you tell me that you used to have dreams about us being together? You know, actually able to be a couple in the outside world. If I think this shit all the way through, shorty, we can do that. Go somewhere far, far away. Just me and you. Get married, have kids together. We can start all the way over, man. I’m tired of this shit, yo. I done spent almost eleven years of my life in here doing the same shit. I can’t do this life sentence. It’s either this or Ima fuck around and kill myself in here. I done watched my son die, my baby mama moved on to a nigga that I was cool with, and now I got a daughter that I didn’t even know existed. Every time something happens on the outside that involves me, and I can’t do something about it, I die a little inside. I swear to God I do!” I said, and my voice cracked.
I didn’t even realize that I was crying until I felt a tear hit me on my chest. I quickly wiped it because I didn’t want to cry in front of a woman. I could see in Raynell’s eyes how much she sympathized with me. Everything that I’d just finished saying to her was the truth. I wasn’t just expressing these things to her because I wanted her to feel bad for me. Suicide has definitely been something that’s been taking up the majority of the space in my head these past few months, which is why it was so important for me to escape this shit. I knew that my black ass risked getting killed if I got caught, but because suicide was an option, I felt like I was going to die anyway. Plus, I wouldn’t know the outcome unless I tried.
“You gotta think, Giovonni, and think very fuckin’ hard. What you just did in the kitchen didn’t take a lot of thought. That shit happens around here almost once a month, so I won’t even give you credit for that. If we do this, I need you to plan something extreme. I need to hear an outline from you about how we plan to do this, and if it doesn’t move me, I’m out. I’m only giving you one chance to convince me. One chance, and I mean it. Think about it. My shift is over. I don’t work this weekend, so I’ll see you Monday morning. Take care.” And with that, she was gone.
With a smile on my face, I flopped down on the bed, and my mind went into overdrive, just thinking about all the shit that I would have to do to pull this off. Since I’ve been in here, this has been the most hope that I’d had so far. I actually had a chance to get the fuck up out of here. I stayed up all night with my pen and pad, writing things down in code, just in case they decided to do another sweep. This shit had consumed me because not once did I even pull out my phone to call anyone from back home. The one person that I did have to talk to had just left.
Ever since I texted my ole girl Jashae’s address, I hadn’t heard back from her, I couldn’t get Jashae to pick up the fuckin’ phone for a nigga, I had no fuckin’ words to say to Krystal’s ass, and the best friend that I did have, I had just killed his ass. As I wrote things down, my mind went to my daughter. I couldn’t help but wonder what she was doing. Was she with Jashae? If she was with Shae, then I would be at peace because I knew that Shae would make sure that little girl was protected, even though she probably hated my ass.
I knew Jashae inside and out, therefore I knew that she would love Maya better than her own fuckin’ mother loved her.
Jashae Johnson
“Jashae, baby, I get it. Trust me, I get it. She’s a little girl, and you don’t want to just throw her to the wolves, but this isn’t, and it shouldn’t be your responsibility to raise her. By accepting this child as your own, you are putting yourself in a situation where you have to deal with Trip and his shit for the rest of your fuckin’ life! I know that’s not what you want.
“Vonte would have been eighteen, which by law would have made him an adult. If he were to continue his relationship with Trip, that would have been his doing. Y
ou wouldn’t have had to be involved. We’re talking about a five-year-old little girl here, so it’s different. She may want to see her dad; therefore, you’re going to be back in the picture, taking her down there to see him. What about her mama? What about when she finally gets her shit together and decides that she wants her daughter back. Then what? What about actually going down there to the courthouse and filing for temporary custody of her? Are these things that you actually sat and thought about?” My grandmother hit me with question after question.
Truth is, I’d been avoiding her, my daddy, and Mahogany as much as I could because I didn’t want them to question what was going on. Whenever the three of them told me that they were coming over, I always came up with some excuse about how I wasn’t feeling well or some lie about me not being home because I didn’t want them to judge me. Leave it to my grandma to just pop her ass up on me this Saturday morning unannounced.
When she came over, I was caught red handed because Maya was in the kitchen eating breakfast. Do you know that I was going to lie and say that Maya was Miami’s daughter, Taniya, because I just honestly thought that it would go over her head, but then again, I had to remember who the hell I was dealing with. I ended up leaving Maya in the kitchen so she could eat her breakfast while I went in the office downstairs and explained everything to my grandma. It sucked because Miami was at his rec center, so he wasn’t even there to have my back in all of this.
“You want to know the real reason why I don’t want to drop her off? I remember I was in the eighth grade. Shit, what was her name? Manushka. Yeah, that was her name. She was Haitian. A really quiet girl. Never really said anything to anyone. She always sat in the back of the class, but she was smart as hell. I remember she would finish her test in like ten minutes, and then she would lay her head on the desk and wait for everyone else to finish. She was so weird to me. At least, in the beginning, I viewed her as weird. It would be one hundred degrees outside, and she would have jeans on under her school uniform skirt, and she always wore big ass sweaters to school like we lived in Antarctica or something. You can only imagine the way she was bullied in school. She was like a mystery because really no one knew anything about her. She was a loner. It wasn’t until this new club at my school was introduced. Remember the Girl’s R Us club that you had me join?” I asked, and she nodded yes.
“We just talked about basic things about being a girl. Pretty much every girl in the classroom shared something. We were all surprised that Manushka was there because her ass didn’t participate in anything. We were even more surprised when she started to share. I believe that everyone in that room was crying after she finished speaking. She talked about being given up for adoption from the moment she was born. She basically grew up in foster care.
“When she turned ten, she was adopted, and she lived with a married white couple and their four boys. She talked about the many nights she was beaten and raped. We thought the big clothes that she wore were because she was weird, but little did we know, she was covering herself up, to steer any guy away from ever looking at her. Also, because she was covering up bruises. I remember my teacher, Ms. Jackson, who was over the club jumping into action right there. Cops were at the school, CPS, it was a real big thing. Weeks had gone by, and I remember asking Ms. Jackson about what happened to Manushka, and all she said was that she was back in foster care and that the parents were in jail. The two older boys who were raping her had been arrested as well. We never saw or heard from Manushka again.
“Ma, I’m in situation where I can take care of Maya. If I put her in foster care, for the rest of my life, I’ll be questioning it. I know it’s not my responsibility to even care, but she’s been with me almost a week now. Her mama don’t want her, and Trip cannot do a damn thing with her. Would it hurt that bad if I kept her?” I asked.
The look on my grandmother’s face screamed that I was somehow getting through to her. I could tell by the way her face had softened. Moments ago, when she came in the house and saw Maya, it was on and popping because she kept questioning who the hell this little girl was that I had in the kitchen.
“Here’s what I feel like you should do. Get a lawyer. We need paperwork signed by her sorry ass mammy that basically shows that she agrees to give away her rights as her mother. This is also to protect you from her popping her ass up five years from now, screaming that she’s ready to be her mother again. Chillllddd, you are better than me. When I was your age, honnneeeeyyy, the way I would have read into Trip, his mama, and that sorry ass baby mama, they would have never in their fuckin’ lives played with me again,” my grandma said.
“You say that because the shoe isn’t on your foot. If I was on the outside, looking in, I probably would have said that I wouldn’t have taken the child in either, but I’m actually living this, so it’s different. Will you watch her for me? Just for like an hour. I need to go and tell Miami something. He’s at the rec center, and it’s no telling when he’s going to bring his ass home,” I said, and she looked at me with a smirk on her face.
“I hope you getting ready to tell that man that your ass is pregnant,” she said.
“Maybe. Maybe not.”
I opened the door, so we could walk out of the office where we had been talking for the past ten minutes or so.
“You don’t have to talk around the subject with me, baby. I’m old fashioned. I see pregnancy all in your damn face. I’ll watch her until you get back,” she let me know.
We made it back to the kitchen where Maya was. Since she’d been living with me, I found out that this little girl loves her some damn bacon, so this morning, I cooked bacon, eggs, and grits for her. I looked down at her plate and saw that she’d cleaned it. She had been a little bit better these past couple of days. After the first night, I think it kind of hit her that her mama wasn’t coming to get her, so at night, I would have to stay in the room with her while she cried herself to sleep. She barely talked, and when she did, it was always to ask me if I could call her mama for her.
Of course, whenever I would call Krystal, the bitch would never answer the phone. Although Maya was five, which wasn’t technically a baby, I felt like she was still a lot of work. I was changing the sheets almost every morning because no matter what, she was still peeing in the bed. I’d be damned if I allowed her to go to bed with a pull-up on, so this was something that we were still working on. Her vocabulary really wasn’t that strong, so often, when she wanted something, she would point to it, which is something else that I was working on with her. I was trying to get her to use her words.
Krystal didn’t teach this little girl any damn thing, which was so fuckin’ sad. Miami’s daughter would be landing later on tonight, so maybe with Maya around another child, she’d show some kind of life. I never got to meet Tahira, and I wasn’t even sure what the hell happened on the phone that night when I walked in on Miami snapping on her because I never asked. All I knew was that it had Miami pissed off to the point that he didn’t even care to see her the next day, so we still hadn’t met.
“I’m going to leave for a few, but I’ll be back. My grandma is going to watch you until I get back. You okay?” I asked Maya.
She just always seemed so sad. Miami and I took her to the park yesterday, thinking that it would be good for her, but she stayed up under me the entire time, too scared to play with the other kids. Eventually, Miami ended up carrying her over to the swings, where he pushed her back and forth, and even that wasn’t too exciting for her. That little girl wanted her mama badly. Pretty soon, I was going to need Krystal to drop a location because we couldn’t just keep doing this to this little girl. I just felt like Maya wasn’t going to be content until she saw Krystal.
“I’m fff… Fine,” she let me know.
My grandma didn’t know she stuttered, so when she heard her, her face resembled the way mine must have looked the first time that I heard her speak. As if she belonged to me, I kissed her forehead, letting her know that I would be back, and within seconds
, I was out the door, making sure that I had what I needed in my purse to show Miami. He wasn’t going to let me live this down. I couldn’t wait for him to get home; I had to actually pop up on his ass and show him this in person. This information was going to rock his damn world.
Miami’s rec center was right smack dab in the middle of the hood, and since I was coming from his house, which was far from the hood, it took me about forty minutes to get to where he was. He drove his truck today, which was parked in the reserved parking spot, and I found an empty spot right next to him and parked there.
Like always, it sounded like a damn club from the loud, rap music that was blasting through the speakers. There were maybe fifteen to twenty rings in there, and each one of them was occupied. Miami taught a teenage class in the mornings on the weekends. The boys loved him, and they looked up to him something crazy. There were all types of people in there from little boys, to younger boys, teenagers, guys who looked to be in their middle twenties and thirties, and even a few older guys. Coming here and seeing all of Miami’s hard work always made me so happy for my man. I loved everything about the way he gave back to the hood.
Miami was a millionaire; therefore, he didn’t have to do any of this. We’re talking about a man who was willingly coming back to the hood and feeding these young boys all the knowledge and skills that they would need when it came to boxing, so that one day they could potentially follow the same path as Miami.
I scanned the large room and spotted him from the back. His shirt was off, so how could I not recognize that back? I just had my legs wrapped around his waist early this morning, and my fingernails were just digging in his sexy, muscular back late last night. Like a woman who knew she was lucky, I smiled as I made my way over to him. He didn’t see me yet, but his student did. He pointed his head in my direction, basically telling Miami that I was standing behind him. It was no secret that I was his woman.
Down With the King of the South 3 Page 8
