It’s nice that she lets me know that she’s there.
She closes the door and within a few minutes she’s back out and kisses me on the cheek before heading back to her seat.
“Just another hour or so.” She assures me, winking at me.
I don’t even know where we are, but it feels like we’ve been on the plane forever and I don’t know if I can stay in my seat any longer.
I think about Vicky and the hard time that she had growing up. It’s not her fault. The choices that were made when she was younger had nothing to do with her, but it still affected her and that’s what most people don’t get.
The choices that my mother has made makes me want to throw up in my mouth. The poor choices had nothing to do with me.
I wonder what it would’ve felt like to live a normal life. A mother that always wanted to be around. One that only wanted to spend time with me.
I don’t think about it long though, I can’t miss something that I never had. It sounds cold, but it’s the truth.
It’s not long before I feel the plane going down. I can’t wait to get off the plane. It’s dawn outside when we touch down and I realize that we’ve been on the plane for a full day and a few hours. I haven’t eaten much of anything.
When Vicky gets up I do too and get my luggage. I think that I’m going to just take a bus to Vegas and then a cab to the address that Corinne has given me.
Just like Vicky has promised she’s waiting for me at the gate. There are a lot of people and so glad that I don’t have to search her out.
“Everything is going great.” She hugs me to her, glad that she can put her arms around me again. I can see the glow in her eyes.
“Yes, one stop and then another. Is your father picking us up?” I ask her.
“No, we’re going to take a cab and he’s going to pay for it.” She assures me.
I nod my head and watch her take out her own phone.
It’s nice to know that she knows a little bit of the surroundings.
I hear her calling for a taxi and we go out front to one that just pulls up looking for anyone that might need one.
“First come, first serve.” The cabby yells out to us.
I look at Vicky and she nods her head.
We put our things in the trunk. She takes the front seat while I take the seat behind her. The cab smells like cigarette smoke, the cab driver looks like he hasn’t slept in days. A creepy sight in itself.
I don’t say anything as I lean my head against the window.
We pull up to a rickety house that looks more like a shack and I don’t say anything. I promised that I wouldn’t.
I was warned, but I never thought that it would be this bad. There’s a car in the driveway, but it doesn’t look like it’s been working in years.
I take money out of my wallet and give it to the cabby when he tells us what the fare is.
“Keep the change.” I tell him.
Vicky looks embarrassed that I had to do this. I don’t mind it at all. I don’t have to worry about any expense. It’s just a cab fare.
“I bet the lights got shut off.” Vicky groans as we get our luggage and head for the house. The cabby drives off before I can even ask him to wait around.
I was going to pay for the extra, but it doesn’t look like he cares. Time is money and I get that. I guess I wouldn’t care either.
I follow her up the gravel driveway and watch her step down onto the stairs. I’m glad it’s morning and it’s not pitch-black out.
Vicky knocks on the door and then she pushes it hard. The door opens and I can see that no one is home.
“Dad?” Vicky calls out even though she knows that no one is here too.
“I think that maybe they went to the store?” I ask her.
“No, I know what happened.” Vicky grunts, shaking her head.
She doesn’t tell me, and I don’t ask her. She looks at the fireplace. It’s not been used in days. The food left on the counter.
She goes to the fridge and when she turns it on there’s no light. She’s right. The lights have been shut off.
“He knew you were coming, right?” I whisper to her as if it’s a secret.
“Yeah, he knew I was coming.” Vicky mutters, almost snapping at me but I don’t say anything. She’s not mad at me.
She’s mad at the situation and there’s nothing that I can do to help her.
“Well, we can stay here for the night or we can get a hotel in town?” I ask her.
“I don’t want to use anymore of the money that I’m sure you had set aside for yourself. There’s still some wood here though and I know how to make a fire. It looks as if he’s left in a hurry with his new family.” Vicky starts making a fire because it’s cold in here.
I will have to say that she knows how to survive. It’s not long before she has a roaring fire going and we can sleep on the couch.
“It folds out to a bed.” She tells me, seeing that I’m staring at it.
I grin at her and nod my head.
I’m hungry but I don’t tell her that. I hear her stomach growling already and know that I’m not the only one.
“We can at least order something to eat.” I don’t want to go any longer without something greasy in my stomach.
“Pizza?” She asks.
“Yes, I only eat cheese. You have something different if you want though.” I point out to her, letting her know that she doesn’t have to get what I do.
“The only one I will eat is cheese too.” I hear the words come out of her mouth and we laugh together.
Even during the worst times, we can laugh knowing that we’re going to get through it.
I order the food, making sure that I look up the nearest pizza joint.
“A half hour. I’m not sure that I’m going to last that long.” I tell her, rolling my eyes.
“I’m going to die of boredom here.” She shakes her head.
“I’m thinking we should take a bus the rest of the way. Spend the day here and then head on through.” I suggest to her.
“I like that.” She nods her head.
She’s happy that I’m putting the time with her into consideration too. If her father was here that’s what we would’ve done anyways even if it was longer than a day.
“Do you have any idea where he might have gone?” I ask her.
Vicky doesn’t answer me. Instead she walks down a narrow hallway and down to one of the bedrooms. She’s in there so long I head down after her.
“He packed their clothes. Look at this place.” She shakes her head.
“I’m sorry.” I whisper to her.
“It’s not your fault. I should’ve known that this was what he was going to do. He hasn’t changed. He didn’t want to be called out on his lies. That’s what it’s about. He can’t even afford to keep the lights on so I’m sure he got kicked out.” She guesses.
I think it’s more than a guess though. She knows her own father.
“What about the car?” I ask her.
“That car hasn’t been working since the last time I saw him. I don’t even know why he didn’t just junk it. At least that would be money. I guess I feel bad for his new wife. I wonder if she knew what she was getting into when she met him. He promises them the world and then when he has them wrapped around his finger is when the promises refuse to happen.” Vicky’s voice is cold, it’s strange to my ears.
I can see why she’s so strong though, why she doesn’t let a lot of people in. She’s afraid they are going to be like her father so what’s the point.
“Thank you for paying the fare.” She tells me.
“Don’t worry about it. I have money for our bus tickets too.” I assure her.
“You must have a good paying job.” She laughs a little.
Before I can answer though there’s a knock on one of the windows and it makes me jump.
“Food.” I tell her, heading up the hallway and taking the money out of my wallet as I go to the front door.
<
br /> It saves me from the comment of money.
Chapter Ten
I bring the pizzas to the table and Vicky has found candles so that we can at least eat by some light. I think it’s fun almost like camping, but I can see that she’s not happy at all as she chews her food.
Since I’ve known her, I haven’t seen her this silent before. I don’t like it. I wish that I could put her in a happier mood.
“You should try calling him.” I suggest.
“He’s not going to pick up and if he does, he’s going to have some lame excuse like he always does. I don’t know why I thought he would be different this time around.” She growls, being hard on herself.
“It’s not your fault.” I whisper to her.
“I know, it’s just that I really wanted to see that he changed. I had that slight hope that he was different this time. That he was really getting his act together.” She explains to me.
“You can’t blame yourself for having that. You’re human. He made this decision knowing how it was going to affect you. We can’t go on what our parents do. We just have to make ourselves better.” I point a finger at her as I take another slice of pizza.
I can’t believe that the first one is almost gone before we stop eating and I feel like a pig, but I’m happy that my belly is full.
“We have card games if you want to play. I found them in the closet in the bedroom.” She tells me.
I’m not bored at all and I don’t like card games.
“I think we should just sit and spend time with each other. I don’t care too much about cards. Besides, this is fun for me if we are spending more time together.” I grin at her.
From the flicker of the candles I see a smile come across her face. Not a very big one, but still a smile and I will take that as a win.
She walks out of the kitchen and goes to the living room. She pulls the couch out and it does fold out to a bed just like she said it would.
“You want to help me move this? I figure that if the bed is facing the fire, we will be able to stay warmer that way.” Vicky tells me.
“Yes, agreed.” I grin, feeling the cold going through my jacket. It’s not a very heavy one, but I didn’t think that we would need to be this prepared.
We move the couch quickly and I sit at the foot of the bed. I can’t even take a shower which I want to so badly.
“I will get the extra blankets. They didn’t take the ones off the bed and that’s the warmest blanket.” She tells me.
“We can take it with us if you want to.” I call out to her as she heads down the hallway.
“I don’t want anything of his. I won’t take any of it.” Vicky’s voice is heard again when she returns with the blankets.
I nod my head.
“Like I will borrow things, but never take them. He can have all of it. He doesn’t even exist to me anymore.” The venom in her voice makes my heart ache for her.
I can’t say that what she’s saying is a lie. I feel the same way when my mother just takes off on me. I don’t like it and it hurts me inside, but I come running every time she calls me to let me know that she wants to see me.
It’s not my job to run, I’m her child even if I am grown.
“We will be warmer if you want to cuddle.” She tells me, getting on the bed and under the covers.
“That would be good. I want the warmth.” I giggle at her.
It goes without saying that I want more than that. I just wish that we were in front of her father so she wouldn’t have to be so heartbroken over it.
Quickly I get under the blankets with her and we use the cushions as pillows.
“I’ve never done this before.” I giggle as we hold each other tightly, our mouths just inches away from each other.
“Never?” She looks shocked.
“I didn’t have a lot of friends growing up and the friends that I did have I wouldn’t allow at my house. I didn’t want them that close to knowing about my real life.” I sigh.
“I get that.” Vicky agrees with me as we hold each other tighter.
“The bus is going to be slow we will have different layovers I’m sure, but in the end it’s cheaper.” I don’t want to take the bus myself.
I’ve never liked even taking the city bus.
“It’s fine, we’ll be able to at least sit with each other.” Vicky tells me, the soft voice that I’m used to now.
“Everything is going to be okay Vicky, I’m here.” I whisper against her ear.
“I know, I know it will be.” She reassures me that she’s okay.
I close my eyes and don’t realize that I drift off to sleep in that moment that we continue to hold one another.
Not until she moves away from me and I feel the coldness again.
“Where did you go?” I complain, bringing the blanket closer to me.
“I had to put more wood on the fire so that it wouldn’t go out. If we use it all up, I’m going to have to go out to the garage and get more.” Vicky makes it sound like a chore.
“If you have to, I will go with you.” I don’t want her to lug all of it in herself.
“Before it gets dark?” She asks me, looking out the window.
Her backs to me when I open my eyes and I can see that the clouds are gray. I look at my phone and see that I’m on low charge. I came very well prepared for my trip at least. I have an extra battery in the power pack that I’ve brought.
“Yes. If you want, we can do that now.” I tell her, pulling the blanket off me and letting the cool air get to me.
There are three pieces of wood left. That’s not going to last through the night and someone’s going to have to tend to it.
“It’s going to be a very long night.” Vicky looks at me.
She can see the same thoughts on my face.
“Yes, we’re going to be really tired.” I nod my head at her.
“You think so.” She pushes me playfully and helps me up so that we can go out to the garage.
There are boxes upon boxes of junk. From old car parts to magazines and trash. I can see that her father wasn’t one for keeping things clean.
We see the wood in the corner of the garage in the back. There’s a lot of it. We could stay if we really wanted to, but that’s the last thing that Vicky wants to do.
Vicky loads my arms up with wood and then fills a small sled with her own wood. I let her go first since she’s the one that can open the door.
Vicky drops the wood in the kitchen, and I do the same.
“It’s not like we’re going to be here tomorrow morning. We don’t have to worry about that.” She shrugs.
I warm my hands up by the fire. It seems as if it’s gotten colder out there and I don’t like the feel of my fingers growing numb.
“You want another blanket?” She asks me.
I nod my head, feeling my teeth chattering. This is a journey that we will definitely remember even when we’re old and gray.
Vicky hurries down the hallway with her phone that has a flashlight and comes back with an even bigger blanket than the last one.
I go to the bathroom and come back quickly I don’t even bother to look around. At least there’s toilet paper on the roll.
Going back out to the living room Vicky is already in bed with one arm tucked behind her head and the other one resting on the blanket that’s now up to her neck.
“I’m sorry that you have to deal with this tonight.” Vicky whispers to me.
“There’s nothing for you to be sorry about. You thought he was going to be here, he wasn’t. I only suggested the idea of a hotel room. I didn’t mind it, but in the long run I know that it will save money.” I pull the blanket back and get into bed.
I lay close to her and I love watching the fire that’s growing. The flames look comforting and yet I know that within a second fire can turn dangerous and burn down a house.
“I was just wanting something different than what we have. I should’ve saved the money to get my own hotel while I w
as here, I didn’t think of it as a backup plan because he assured me that he was going to be here.” Vicky puts her head on my shoulder.
I wrap an arm around her knowing that she needs comfort right now. She needs to be held. She’s been here for me and there’s no question that I’m going to be here for her as long as she needs me.
Tomorrow is coming up quickly and I know that there’s going to be a big disappointment no matter if Corinne is there at her house waiting for me or if Vicky is going to be hanging around to see how things go.
I try not to think about it as I kiss the side of Vicky’s head. Pulling her closer to me.
There’s a small smile on her face and the glow of the fire makes her face look angelic. Something that I’ve never seen before.
“You worried about tomorrow?” Vicky asks me, lifting her head slightly.
I shake my head no.
“Good.” She grins.
“I’ve put that to the back of my mind. It’s not about me right now.” I assure her, I’m the type to only think about me, me, me.
“I know.” She murmurs and closes her eyes.
I fall asleep staring at the flicker of the flames and hearing the crackle of the wood that it’s burning through.
It could be worse. We could be out in the middle of nowhere in the snow. Not knowing how to keep warm.
There are people out there that are worse off than us. That’s what I’ve always told myself since I was younger.
No matter what was going on in my life someone had it worse off than I did. Even on the rainy days when my mother wouldn’t come home for hours at a time as if she forgot that she had a child at home.
It wasn’t like I was always alone, but I never had any real friends, and no one asked me if I wanted to have them over anyways.
At one point I would have invited someone random over to get to know them if I had the courage to show them how my home life used to be.
Only at the same time if I had complained about anything, they would tell me that I was crazy. That they could only dream to have the life that I did and think that I was ungrateful. I never was. I never took anything for granted, maybe that’s why I’m so humble now.
If I hadn’t gone through all that I had I don’t think that I would be the same person that I am today. I would expect everything handed to me.
A Love Like Ours Page 6
