Valaine gave me a long look, and I found warmth in the dark pits of her black eyes. This was an odd sense of comfort I was getting, but I’d take it. I needed her with me, and she needed me. There was no denying that. Valaine’s journey was the hardest. The pain it caused her was excruciating, and I knew she’d do anything for me, just as I was willing to do anything for her. I felt my lips stretch into a smile. I pressed them against her temple and froze.
Her skin felt cold. Perhaps too cold for an Aeternae, and certainly not the way I’d felt her before. “Are you okay?” I asked.
“Why do you ask?” she replied. Her breathing was shallow.
“Your skin is like ice.”
Morning immediately reacted, almost shoving me out of the way as she got between us and put her hand on Valaine’s forehead. “Oh crap,” the Reaper murmured.
“What is it?” Phantom asked.
“It’s coming,” Morning said, giving me a startled look.
“I’m confused.”
Valaine grunted, wobbling on her feet. “No… oh no, not now…”
“What’s happening?” Nethissis managed as Seeley and Rudolph pulled her away from us. Valaine, Phantom, Morning, and I were left behind, the temperature dropping around us as though a blizzard were about to fill the tunnel with ice and snow and death.
“Darkness… it’s coming out,” Valaine cried out, dropping to her knees. Though terrified of the pain that it would bring upon my body and soul, I knelt in front of her, clutching her hands. “No, Tristan… get away from me.”
She tried to pull back, but I wouldn’t let her. “We’ll get through this, Valaine.”
“You don’t understand.” Phantom gasped, her galaxy eyes wide with what I could only describe as fear. Unimaginable fear. “If she unleashes it now, she risks killing every single living creature within her reach. I’m not saying she can kill you specifically, since you’ve already survived multiple episodes, but she’ll release Black Fever. The Aeternae aren’t safe.”
“Plus, we don’t know what such concentrated darkness will do to the Rimians and the Naloreans,” Morning added. “It’ll show above, as well. The death that comes out of our sister’s suffering… it’ll give our position away.”
As the Reapers spoke, I felt Valaine’s hands softening in mine. Her shoulders slumped, and the corners of her mouth turned downward as she looked at me. I saw the suffering in her eyes, and I felt it, too. She was terrified of what she might release, of the damage she might inflict upon the innocents we’d sworn to protect. They were all within her range, and the tunnel had to act as a kind of conduit, making everything infinitely worse.
“Valaine, look at me,” I said, cupping her face and bringing her lips closer to mine. “You’re going to get through this. Listen to my voice, darling. Breathe in and out. Don’t leave me here, okay?”
She nodded, but she had trouble concentrating. Her eyelids were drooping, and it was only a matter of time before she’d pass out and give in to it all. The worst part was that I could feel it. The darkness. It was oddly familiar. The kind of pain I’d felt before, deep within my bones. I wasn’t ready to feel it again, but what could I do? Run? No, Valaine needed me.
If I could absorb even a fraction of what she was about to release, I might be able to protect at least some of the people in the tunnel. My sister and Kalon were the closest and in clear danger. I couldn’t let anything happen to Esme.
The urgency of our situation amplified as Seeley and Rudolph took Nethissis farther away, and Phantom and Morning got down on their knees, joining us on the ground and gripping Valaine’s shoulders, as if preparing for what would undoubtedly come next.
I looked to my left, seeing Esme and Kalon not far ahead of Seeley. The Visentis boys were close to Kalon, so they also risked catching the Black Fever. My stomach churned, an ache spreading through my torso as my lips parted.
“Run, Esme! All of you! Run!” I shouted.
Despite our need for silence, I couldn’t keep quiet while the darkness oozed out of Valaine and spread in every direction. My muscles hardened as my chest was constricted by an invisible force. Black ink seemed to fill my veins, visible through the pale skin. The fever was quick to follow, setting my flesh on fire as I struggled to remain upright.
Valaine was as stiff as a board, the whites of her eyes black, dark veins spidering around the eyelids. Her breathing was barely audible, the cold air biting into my hot skin. This was it. The darkness. The result of millions of years of suffering caused by the Spirit Bender. Valaine was consumed by it, so much so that it was now looking to feed on someone else. No one was safe. Not even me.
But as I held on to her, as I braced myself for the nothingness to swallow me whole, I knew we had another shot at digging through her memories. “Valaine, I need you to listen to me,” I whispered in her ear, knowing she wouldn’t be able to respond anymore. Catatonia had already taken over. “I need you to listen, Valaine,” I repeated. “I need you to follow my voice, because we are not letting this… this suffering claim any more lives.”
My confidence was impressive, considering how my body was already succumbing to the Black Fever. I wrapped my arms around her and looked at Morning and Phantom. Neither appeared reassured, so I had no certainty about what would happen next. All I had was my faith in Valaine.
I hoped it would be enough. I hoped it would save us all.
Esme
I was told to run, but my feet had suddenly turned to lead.
Looking ahead, I saw Nethissis being dragged away by Seeley and Rudolph. She didn’t want to go with them, but she didn’t have much of a choice. Soul and Kelara were working hard to zap the Orvisians farther through the tunnel with a clear sense of urgency. Behind us, I could see Tristan and Valaine on their knees. My brother looked pale—his face as white as a sheet of paper, black veins darting across his face. Valaine seemed stiff, her eyes fully black with dark veins stretching around them.
Morning and Phantom were there, too, but they were helpless. Horror filled my soul, and my instincts flared as I understood what was happening.
“Esme, that doesn’t look right,” Kalon said.
“I don’t think we should be here,” Ansel added, holding Tudyk’s and Moore’s hands. The rest of the crew kept moving through the tunnel. We weren’t even halfway there, and I had a feeling our problems were about to get worse.
“Ansel, take your brothers and run as fast as you can,” I said to the boy. “Don’t look back. Keep running and tell everybody else to do the same.”
“What’s happening?” Moore asked, glancing back at Valaine.
“The darkness,” Kalon muttered, his voice low and raspy and dripping with fear. “Ansel, do what Esme told you. Now! Run!”
The air grew heavy, supercharged with electrical particles that crackled through my hair. The energy rippled over my skin, sending icy shivers down my spine as I gripped Kalon’s shoulders.
“What about you?” Ansel asked Kalon.
“He’s right. You need to go, too,” I said, my voice breaking. “Once the darkness hits, you’ll be susceptible to Black Fever.”
“I’m not leaving you!” Kalon argued.
“You have to! Dammit, Kalon—I can’t let my brother stay behind alone, and I’m a vampire. The Black Fever might not kill me.”
“We both know what’s coming out of Valaine might be a lot worse than just the normal curse,” Kalon snapped. “I can’t go without you.” He paused to look at his brothers. “Ansel, go!”
The boys didn’t want to leave, but they had no choice. Ansel started running, dragging Moore and Tudyk away with him. Having Kalon with me under these circumstances didn’t feel right, but I couldn’t stop him. My heart thudded almost painfully in my chest as I looked over my shoulder.
Phantom and Morning were shouting something, but the sounds never made it to us. Time seemed to slow down, the tunnel darkening as the torches Ridan had left behind on the walls died out, one by one. With every flame tha
t died, I felt closer to the cold embrace of death, and I didn’t want to be anywhere near it.
But I couldn’t leave. I needed to get to Tristan. The longer he held on to Valaine, the worse he looked, and the harder it got for him to even keep his head up. There was no way to describe the forces that came out of Valaine’s Aeternae vessel. They thickened the air and drew layers of frost on the tunnel walls. Steam rolled out with every exhalation.
“Tristan!”
He couldn’t hear me. He wrapped his arms around Valaine and held her close. There were tree roots poking out through the tunnel walls, and they began to blacken and rot before gradually drying and falling off like gangrenous limbs. I remembered Tristan’s description of Valaine’s previous bout of darkness, and the similarities were downright terrifying. I knew he had to stop her, to help her get back to the surface of her consciousness, but she was hurting him.
I couldn’t let that happen.
Kalon’s voice broke through. “Esme, don’t!” he shouted, though I was already running toward Tristan. I reached my brother in a single short breath, and the disease hit me like a physical blow. Hard and merciless, right in my chest. I heaved, struggling to retain my senses as I grabbed Tristan’s hand and tugged with all my strength.
There wasn’t much of it left, however. My arms were soft, like jelly.
“Esme, get away!” I heard my brother say.
“No, I’m not leaving you!” I screamed.
“You’re getting sick,” Phantom murmured, her voice echoing in the back of my head.
Valaine’s lips parted, her head tilting back. “What’s happening?” I asked, nausea raising bile in my throat. Smoke… black smoke came out of Valaine’s mouth. It smelled like smoldering tar, and it felt like the purest form of suffering. It broke my heart to see her like this. The symptoms of her Unending condition were getting worse with every one of these episodes.
Tristan inhaled some of the black smoke, and his eyes rolled up into his head, white as marbles. He froze, just like Valaine.
“What the hell is happening?!” I gripped his shoulders and shook him as hard as I could. Morning swiped out a hand, releasing a flash of light that briefly blinded me. I was thrown back, hitting the ground.
“Get away from him,” Morning said.
I scrambled to get myself back up, and I started running. Adrenalin coursed through my veins, but I didn’t stop running. Looking over my shoulder, I saw Tristan. There wasn’t anything I could do to get my brother away from Valaine. She wasn’t listening. She couldn’t hear him. She’d lost all control, and the darkness spreading out of her was killing everything in its path, including the trees growing above. I could think of no better trail to leave for the Darklings, no better proof that Valaine was dangerous.
Of course, I also understood that none of this was her fault and that freeing her was absolutely imperative, but… this was my brother. Tristan was falling apart, stricken by the Black Fever, and I wasn’t sure he’d survive it, even though he was a vampire. This was a whole new level of intensity for this disease-like curse, and I worried that none of us were safe.
Valaine’s suffering was lashing out against all forms of life now, not just the Aeternae. I couldn’t be anywhere near her, so I bolted through the tunnel, desperate to put more distance between us. I couldn’t let anyone else get hurt like this. It killed me to leave my own brother behind, but I had no choice.
My legs gradually softened, and panic struck me hard. I fell. My whole body surrendered to the disease. Black ink filled my veins, dancing beneath my white skin. The fever burned through me like the fires of an inferno, and I understood there wasn’t much time left. Something dragged me farther away, and I struggled to free myself. Glancing up, I caught a glimpse of Kalon.
“Kalon! We need to go! Now!” I cried out.
“I know!”
We both glanced back to see what I’d left behind. Though smaller in the distance, I could still see them. Tristan and Valaine were leaning on each other, tendrils of black smoke stretching and swirling around them. Phantom and Morning had pulled back, staring in disbelief as the smoke swelled and swallowed my brother and Valaine.
I heard myself scream. It echoed through the tunnel. I froze. There was a thud behind me. Moments passed in agonizing silence as I managed to pull my gaze away from that lethal darkness. Coughing and heaving still, I looked down and found Kalon on his side. Black blood trickled from the corner of his mouth. He quivered, sweat dripping from every inch of his skin. He looked awful. This was the Black Fever hitting him. It was spreading faster through the tunnel than I’d originally anticipated. My symptoms were getting worse, as well.
“Oh no,” I whispered, my mind switching gears.
Tristan was stuck with Valaine. I wanted to save him, but I couldn’t touch him anymore. Kalon had already fallen under the Black Fever’s influence, and unless I got him as far away from here as possible, I’d lose him.
Grief threatened to tear me apart, but I found a sliver of strength somewhere deep inside me, and I hooked my arms under Kalon’s shoulders. Planting my boots firmly into the ground, I pulled him up and started backing away, my leg muscles twitching and burning under our combined weight.
Unable to take my eyes off Tristan completely, I witnessed everything that happened as I struggled to get Kalon out of harm’s way. The black smoke moved around my brother and Valaine, forming a strange ball, like a revolving planet. Morning and Phantom stared at it, their scythes out and glistening. Whatever this was, it was filled with rage and tears and approximately five million years of misery. It wouldn’t be easy to overcome.
“Kalon, hang in there,” I mumbled, my lips moving slowly.
I was growing sluggish. All the effort I’d put in was withering away, leaving my body frail and unable to react. The Black Fever had taken a firm hold over me, its symptoms settling in and sabotaging my attempt to at least save Kalon.
“No, please… no, just a little while longer…” I sobbed, tears rolling down my cheeks.
I landed on my back with Kalon’s upper body on top of mine, pinning me down. Lifting my head, I watched the black smoke dissipate, revealing my brother and Valaine. Tristan collapsed in front of her, his head resting in her lap.
“Tristan …”
A peculiar kind of warmth enveloped me. It tasted bitter, like surrender. My muscles softened. My bones gave out. My very soul broke as I witnessed the end. It was coming for us all, dark and infinite, inconsolable and wretched. Tristan loved Valaine too much to give up on her. Kalon loved me too much to watch me die. I loved Kalon too much to watch him die... The things we did for love were incredible and scary and baffling all at once.
I passed out, clinging to a twinkling thread of hope that maybe, just maybe, the universe might not give up on us. That it might reward us with salvation because the sacrifices made in the name of love were the noblest of all.
I fell into the darkness, feeling that hopeful thread as it slipped through my fingers, leaving me with nothing. An absolute and empty nothing.
Tristan
“I’m so sorry, Tristan.”
Valaine’s melodious voice was crystal clear in the middle of this vast nothingness. It wasn’t death. It wasn’t suffering, either. It was a familiar kind of limbo. I was tempted to worry about the physical world. I’d caught a glimpse of my sister crying and falling. Tree roots rotting and blackening. The darkness that had taken over Valaine was much stronger this time. It was different, too. More intense… weighing me down in a way it hadn’t in the past. I wanted to get back to the surface, but I understood that we were here for a particular reason.
Yes, she was having another episode, but this time it had taken us deeper, somewhere we’d been before. She’d triggered a trance state, and I didn’t have the time or the energy to wonder how she’d done it. All that mattered was that we were here, and we had to make the most of it before people on the outside died.
“Can you hear me?” I called out, though
I had no sense of myself.
“Yes.”
“I can hear you,” I said. It was peaceful here, in the nothingness. I’d missed this feeling.
“I don’t know how we got here,” Valaine replied. “But I can’t see you.”
“Neither can I. I mean, I can’t see you or myself… it’s like I left my body out there in the real world.”
“That’s probably what happened.” Valaine sighed. “I’m hurting people, Tristan. How do I make it stop?”
It was a difficult question, with an equally difficult answer. There wasn’t a solution in sight—at least not one that might satisfy all our requirements. It broke me to have to tell her this. “Valaine, I don’t think you can make it stop. My guess is that we can only ride the wave and see where it takes us.”
“But your sister, Kalon… all those innocents out there…”
“Let’s see where this darkness leads us, Valaine. We must be here for a reason,” I said. “Maybe it’ll eventually lead us back to the surface, ideally before it’s too late. How are you feeling now?”
She took a moment to answer. “I’m fine, actually. I feel fine. Calm. At peace, even. There’s nothing here, and I can’t explain it.”
“It’s weird, yeah. It’s a peculiar place, but I think it serves as our starting point just like it did before,” I replied. “We can’t do anything for the outside world, but we can do something here. Do you think Phantom or Morning are with us? Maybe they just can’t hear us.”
“No, I don’t feel them.”
“Then we’re alone. All the more reason for us to go through with this, Valaine.”
Silence settled between us once more. I basked in it. I found peace in it, just as she did. I wondered if death would be like this when my time came. All things had to end at some point. We vampires only had the illusion of immortality, not the true sense of it. I was more than happy to settle for that, but I also had to wonder what lay beyond that last breath. Would it be like this? Empty and quiet? Devoid of absolutely everything?
A Shade of Vampire 84: A Memory of Time Page 4
