by Lolah Lace
“That’s not in dispute. I know he’s the best. He has me in contact with my feelings. Dr. Glass is the real deal.”
“If this gets out to the public, it’s on you.”
“No one knows who I am or where I am. You took my old mobile. I have zero contacts in this bloody new iPhone.”
“You need to beg his forgiveness and reassure him that this will never happen again. Tell him you’re clean and committed to his program.” There was silence. “Are you clean?”
I could hear in his voice he was fishing for something that wasn’t there.
“Yes, Glynn, I’m Persil clean. I haven’t even had a sip of wine. I had hot sex and fell asleep. All my tests will come back negative. There isn’t anything in my urine or my blood.”
“Fine. Beg. Tell him you’ll obey his rules. No drugs. No alcohol. No sex.”
“No sex. Why?”
“Jag, what the fuck man? Is it really that hard? You don’t care about this forty-year-old mother. You only need to be celibate for two more months. After you’re done with rehab you can fuck all the groupies, starlets or middle-aged woman you want.”
“I don’t want any groupies or starlets. I fancy Kat.”
“You fancy the old lady. What is wrong with you? You’re twenty and she’s forty-whatever. She’s old enough to be your mother.”
“You’re middle-aged. You’re old enough to be my father.”
“Yes, I am. I want to make it to fifty without an ulcer, a stroke or a massive heart attack. I have to spend all my time babysitting you, Archie, Winston, and Colin. You're supposed to be the good one.”
“Pure rubbish! I’ve never been the good one.”
“Okay well, you’re the captain. You need this recovery process in order to move to the next level with the record executives. You have to drop this bullshit job and the random woman.”
“I don’t want to give up Kat. I don’t think I can physically do it.”
“Why not?”
“She’s fucking fire.”
“In two months I can get you five more just like her.”
“Listen, I already did it. I shagged. I sort of transferred my drug addiction into her fanny. You do not understand but there is literally only one Katrina Sweet. She’s my new drug. I’m addicted, bloody hell, cut me some slack.”
“Katrina Sweet, that’s her real name?”
“Yes. She’s beyond gorgeous. I’m totally infatuated. I’m going to give it a proper go. I can’t help it. My mind is set on it. I’m not going to waver. I have to have this one thing or I’ll quit. I’ll quit everything. I’m already a wealthy bloke. I can go independent and sell records without a major label.”
“Calm down. Okay, look, I will talk to David and tell him that you violated the no sex rule. I will ask him if he can make an exception. Jag, man, I don’t know what else I can do.”
You can manage because you’re my bloody manger!
“I appreciate it. I don’t want to leave rehab. He’s really helping me.”
“Go there now. Go to David. He’s going to test you. Don’t make a fucking liar out of me. You’re clean right?”
“Yes, I swear.”
“Go back to the house now.”
“Okay. I am.”
I listened as my mobile went dead. I guess it was time to pay the piper. Rebel Yell started playing again.
Chapter 14
JASON
Grueling, that's how I would explain my two-hour therapy session with Dr. David. I was piss tested first. I passed with flying neon colors. I could tell David thought I would fail. He didn't know me well. I didn't have any reason to lie to him. The record label was paying for his services.
After the results, we sat and I explained to him how it wasn’t planned. How I felt a connection with her. How she was a positive influence on me with her normal and minimalist approach to life. I made him feel like I needed his approval. I wasn’t his average celebrity client. I watched people my entire life. I knew people. There was a reason he didn’t have a kid. I was sure I was his first and only young client. I wasn’t some old washed up rockstar that was trying to make a comeback. I was a kid in his eyes that hadn’t lived up to my full potential. He wanted to help me and guide me on the path to happiness.
I negotiated with him until we made a gentleman’s deal. We settled on two hours a day of therapy, drug tests on-demand, instead of once a week, or when he thought I messed up. He issued a curfew of midnight. I was allowed to keep my job. I had to talk about my relationship with my boss in our sessions. It seemed like a good deal because all I wanted to do was talk about Kat.
I was emotionally drained from the first session. David wanted me to pay for my desertion. Some of my best performances have come when directors were yelling at me. So the good doctor’s brand of reprimanding wasn’t too much to bear. I was a veteran fuck up and a model citizen all rolled into one bloke.
I was able to hop on my bike and ride back into town. The sun was hot as balls. The air was fresh. I estimated that I dropped a pound of cum inside Kat. Everything in my life was good. I had a lingering clear image of Kat in her open dressing gown. That was an image I couldn’t seem to shake. I didn’t want to forget the image but I also didn’t want to have a rock hard cock in the middle of the day.
I didn’t want her to get the wrong idea about me. What was that American saying? I wasn’t trying to hit it and quit it. I’d done that when I was on the road but this was a completely different experience. I’d taken the time to get to know her and I liked every single thing about her, bloody everything.
I had been judged my entire life. There were so many misconceptions about me. One that privately came up quite often was the rumor that I was gay. I didn’t know where it came from. There was nothing wrong with being gay but this industry tended to hold on to secrets. Sometimes they’d make them up from nowhere. I didn’t date publicly and I was always too busy to have a steady girl. I was on the road all the time. I was flying from country to country. I never had the available time to put into a relationship. Not having a public girlfriend equaled being gay for a few celebrities. I believe my female fans knew I was straight. Some media outlets labeled me as closeted. All that meant was every man and woman tried to bed me. The media always had it wrong.
Later I found out that a lot of the children from Kiddie Kingdom had fallen prey to child predators. My mum always hovered around me. She was what they called a helicopter parent. She was always on the set of every tele show, commercial advertisement shoot, and all the music gigs. I had a very strict routine that didn’t include industry parties. I wasn’t allowed behind a closed-door without my mum. I never thought about it until things started to spill out in the media. Kids were being molested right on the set of Kiddie Kingdom. They were getting robbed of their youth. I was unaware of these things because of the shield that my mum and my aunt Linda built around me.
I arrived at the Sweet Treats at eleven. I made sure I texted Kat that I was on my way. She left the back door unlocked for me. I entered feeling good regardless of the tiff I got into with my warden. I shouldn’t call him that. It was his job to look after me. If I failed he would take it as a personal failure. He was one of those kinds of guys. He was in touch with his feelings.
I placed my backpack on the floor behind the counter. Kat was sitting in the chair on her laptop.
“Hey.” I kissed her cheek and tried to measure if that was the right thing to do.
“Hey.” She smiled as she looked up at me. That glitter lip-gloss made my bell-end twitch.
Remember, I am an American with a west coast accent.
“Have there been a lot of customers?”
“No, not yet.” She looked me over and went back into her laptop screen.
“Kat, is this awkward?”
“No. Is it awkward for you?” I had her full attention once again.
“No. I just wanted to make sure you were going to talk to me today.”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
/>
“I don’t know.” I flipped my palms up and then back down to my sides.
“Did you get into some kind of trouble with your uncle?”
“No, I wouldn’t call it trouble.”
“I’m sorry if you did.”
“Honestly, it’s all good. I didn’t come home. My uncle is a little excessively concerned for me. He has a good reason. Sometimes it’s hard to convince people that you’ve changed.”
“Because it’s pretty damn hard for people to change.”
“Really?” I decided to poke at her with my brain instead of my cock. My cock would have another go later.
“I’m not saying it’s impossible but it’s hard. Most people like the way they are, good or bad. They’re comfortable. They don’t want to improve or do better internally.”
“Do you think I need to improve?” I wanted to know what she thought of me.
“I don’t know. I only know what you want me to know.”
“I’m working on me. I’m making improvements.”
“I am too.”
“Why? You are perfect.”
She giggled. “I’m far from that.” She was embarrassed. It was adorable. I’m totally obsessed with this woman.
We were both distracted by the older lady that entered the store with her two children. The little boys were probably her grandchildren. Would I even live long enough to have grandchildren?
I moved away to help our new customers. I loved that Kat would let me do most of the work. It was her shop but she didn’t try to take over. I wanted to occupy my time. She didn’t know how much I needed this job.
Although I tried to push the cravings from my mind, they were there. They lingered. They would appear when I least expected them. I did have issues. I had a substance abuse problem. I guess it was time to stop denying it.
After ringing up a pound of red Swedish fish, half a pound of gummy worms, and half a pound of watermelon Jolly Ranchers, I sent the customers on their way to the ultimate sugar high. I popped a few gummy worms in my own mouth. I hated thinking about heroin. These tarty worms weren’t a good substitution but they would have to do.
There was a rush of people into the shop. We had a steady streak of about seventeen or more customers. The place was buzzing for forty minutes. It was a slight relief when the customers were all gone.
I walked out the front door of the store to see how hot it was outside. I waved to an older bloke. He was the owner of the flower shop across the way. He was watering all of the colorful bouquets of flowers that sat on the outside of his shop.
I decided to go over and buy some for Kat. It was a nice fragrant bouquet of white Oriental Lilies. The flowers matched the woman.
I walked back into the store where Kat was leaning on the counter. Her breasts were pressed into the top of the glass. I was going to make an effort to keep my eyes above her neck.
She eyed me curiously and glanced at the flowers.
“These are for you.” I handed them over.
“Thank you.” She seized them and took a whiff. “I love the smell of Oriental Lilies.”
She knew what kind of flowers they were. I was rather impressed. She was a very smart lady. I already knew that about her.
“I saw a vase in your bedroom. It was empty. I thought they would look nice in your bedroom by the window.”
Her smile scorched my chest. “That’s a great place for them.” She grabbed my shirt and pulled me into a sideways hug. “This is very sweet. Watch the store. I’m going to put them in water.
She pulled away. Her lovely arse bounced as she made her way to the steps that led to her upstairs apartment.
After a few minutes, she was back. She sat in the open chair next to me. I could see her eyes on me.
“What’s the look for?”
“Did you pay for those flowers?” She asked.
“Yes, do you think I would steal from that geezer across the road?”
“I never see you with money.”
“Am I supposed to wave it around?” I gestured with a wave of my hand.
“I’m not trying to be nosy or anything but I went over the bank statements for the store.”
“All right.” I shrugged.
“I happen to notice that you haven’t cashed any of your checks.”
“My checks?” I had no idea what she was talking about.
“Your work checks. I’ve paid you three times already and you haven’t cashed any of the checks.”
“Oh, yea.” Now I remembered the checks. I never opened the envelopes. I just tossed them in the drawer by my bed. One of them could still be jammed in one of the zippers of my backpack. “The checks, yea, I haven’t gotten around to it.”
“You haven’t had a chance to cash them?” Her flawless face distorted but remained attractive.
“No, didn’t do that yet.”
“Do you have a bank account?” She lifted her body from leaning to gape at me.
Not in this town. That didn’t seem like a proper response. I needed to say something proper.
“I do.” I didn’t handle my finances. I had a guy for that.
“You can just go to my bank and cash it. They won’t charge you. It’s just a few blocks down right here on Main Street.”
“Yea, all right.”
“Are you saving them up?”
“Uh—” I shrugged unsure about the proper response.
“If you are saving them, they have an expiration date on them. You have to cash them within ninety days of issue. I want to remind you. I don’t want you to have a problem later.”
“I’m not saving them. I’m sure I won’t have any problem.” I shrugged. I wasn’t going to take her money. Money was the one thing I didn’t need. I needed sex, drugs and rock and roll. Fuck! No drugs! I forgot.
“Jason, you seem so unconcerned with money.”
“Isn’t it the root of all evil or something?” I joked.
“I have never in my life come across a young person that didn’t want to have their hard-earned money right away.”
“You always say I’m different.”
Kat twisted her glossy lips. Something about my delivery wasn’t convincing.
“You live in a nice house with your uncle. Are you rich or something?”
I paused thinking about an adequate yet amusing answer. I didn't want to lie any more than necessary. I hated having to lie to her in the first place.
“No, no, I’m not rich.”
“Right, because why would you work in a candy store if you had a lot of money? You would probably work from home doing something, or selling something. I don’t know.”
“Believe me, I’m not rich.” I didn’t feel it was a lie. What made one rich? Was it having a net worth of 3 million? My net worth was high in the double digits. Anything over 10, 20, 50 would make you wealthy I presume. I was over 50 million so I could consider myself wealthy. Being rich just seemed like an understatement. Therefore, I wasn’t being dishonest. “No, no, I’m not rich.” I was properly proud that I wasn’t lying to Kat about something else.
The fake American accent was wearing me down. I felt like such a fraud and I was slipping up and mixing my native lingo with my Californian dialect. I was also mashing random British slang with American slang. I wasn’t going to be able to keep this up for very long. It was so easy with her. So my dialect started slipping into the realm of easy.
The deception seemed cool at first. Now I find myself stumbling around without a clue. It was much easier to act like an American with a script, an autocue, a fancy director, and a dialect coach.
Kat was watching me intensely. “I believe you. This job isn’t all that special.”
“I don’t know. I sort of love this job.”
“Right.” She rolled her chocolate eyes around.
“I had loads of fun last night.”
“Did you?” She asked.
“Yes, you were amazing.”
Her cheeks bloomed into a bright smile. “Y
ou were,” Her brows raised. “You were a surprise.”
“I will take that as I compliment. Do you want to talk about it?”
“If you want to.” Now she was skittish and trying so hard to give me zero eye contact.
“Yes, don’t be shy. I was inside your body only a few hours ago.”
“That’s true.” She crossed her arms under her chest. “I’ve never had a conversation like this. I have never done something like that with someone that—”
“With someone my age?”
“Yeah that, but I meant with someone I wasn’t dating.”
“We spend almost every day together. It’s very similar to dating.”
“I wanted to say I’m sorry about your back.”
“My back?”
“The scratches. I didn’t know I did that. I saw it this morning when you were putting on your t-shirt. It looks painful. I’m sorry.”
Her apology was darling. “It’s okay. Scratches are par for the course. I’m sure I deserved it.”
“No, you didn’t. You don’t. Honestly, I just haven’t had sex in a very long time. So ah, I got carried away.”
“I understand. I was celibate up until yesterday.”
“Celibate but you had a condom with you.”
“I had one. It’s a habit. It’s been in there for months.”
“Oh, okay. We had sex more than once.” She reminded me, but there was no way I would ever forget.
“Yeah so, I only had to one rubber. I know you’re on the pill.”
“I am but—” She gave me a stern sneer.
“I’m completely clean.”
“How do you know that?”
“I get tested regular.”
“Why do you get tested regularly? What’s regular?”
The bells rang on the front door. We had a customer. Saved by the bell. This group of kids was right on time. We were talking about sexual diseases and that quite frankly wasn’t my favorite topic.
Time moved faster than I hoped. Our banter stayed light. I snuck a few kisses and had to stop myself from bending her over the candy jars. When everything was locked up tight I had a slight panic. The shop was closed, so now what? I wanted her and I wasn’t sure how to make that happen. I usually had answers but today I couldn’t think straight. When she walked past me I grabbed her wrist. I wanted her to know what I wanted and how I felt.
